*Note: Click the Youtube link above to listen to the Audiobook Version of this chapter voiced by Kristen  (kaelking12) featuring music by Sara Bareilles. You don't wanna miss out on this audio!
Alex
One week after Belmar.
Outgoing call to Caleigh Davenport:
"Hey, this is Caleigh. Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, but if you leave your name and number, I'll get back to you as soon as I can. Leave a message in three, two--"
Hey, Caleigh.
It's Alex.
Again.
I'm sorry I've called so many times I just--
--wanted to see if you'd heard from Elias?
He's not picking up his phone or answering his texts, so I just...
...I just wanted to know if he's okay.
And where he is.
And if he said anything about where he was going.
Sorry if I sound crazy, it's just I've kind of been all over the place lately.
One minute I'm mad at him, and the next I'm freaking out wondering if something bad happened to him.
I don't know.
It's been a couple days so, figured maybe you'd seen him.
Gosh, I'm sorry I'm rambling.
I know you're probably really busy with school and everything.
But I'm sitting back in boring New Jersey trying to make sense of things.
Of him.
He just disappeared Caleigh. And I don't know if this is just something he does, or if he has his reasons, but the way he left just doesn't make sense.
I wanna hate him for it. But I can't.
I can't because I don't know if I believe that he'd just up and lie about everything we--
Sorry, I still have to tell you everything.
And I will, eventually, but right I'm just--
--worried.
And I can't stop thinking about it.
Or about him.
And, it's stupid for me to worry because I'm sure he's okay.
I just wish I could be more okay than I am.
'Cause I--
I really um...
Sorry, I didn't want to cry on the phone, but I'm kind of having a hard time because he's not---
---here.
And he said he would be.
He promised Caleigh.
Every morning I wake up and keep thinking he'll be downstairs cooking with mom or sitting at the dining room table reading comics with dad,--
--but he's not.
He's not anywhere.
And I--
--we all miss him. Mom and Dad have been asking if I've heard anything because they're worried too.
They loved him, Caleigh.
Even Dad had good things to say about him, and he hates the idea of me dating anyone.
But you should've seen the three of them together. Elias is like this total business nerd (don't tell him I told you), and he came up with a plan for Mom's restaurant all by himself.
Crazy, right?
The guy can't even string together a sentence, but he just might start a company one day.
Maybe once everything's back to normal, I'll have him show you his plans because they're pretty amazing.
And as upset and lost and confused as I am about him right now, Elias is still--
--he's still an amazing person, Caleigh.
And, he was amazing with me.
I'm sorry I didn't tell you what was going on between us, but things just kind of...happened.
And, sometimes I wish they hadn't happened because then I wouldn't have to feel this way about him.
But I do.
I do.
And, I'm not sure what falling for someone is like, or if I'm just crazy, or clueless, or stupid, but I think--I think he's that someone.
At least, he's that someone for me.
I haven't told that to anyone.
I haven't said anything because I was scared that once I did, I'd fall apart.
But, I think it's too late to avoid that because I'm already in pieces.
He took a lot more of me than I expected when he left.
And, I'm sorry I didn't tell you until now. I'm sorry I wasn't honest with Tanner either because he asked me not to get caught up with Elias, but I am.
Not because I'm sad, or broken, or looking to fix what Rory ruined.
I fell for Elias because he's good to me.
Because I've seen the ways he tries, and when he cares about something, or someone it's so beautiful.
And I know he cares about me.
He sees me, Caleigh.
He actually notices me, and I've spent everyday since Rory feeling like I was invisible.
No one else took the time to pay attention to me the way he does--
--the way he did.
I don't know why I'm talking in the past tense.
He'll probably send me some stupid text later today, and I'll feel like an idiot for leaving this message.
But even if that doesn't happen, I want you and Tanner to know the truth, so there aren't anymore secrets between the three of us.
I want you guys to know how I feel about Elias. I want mom and dad to know. I want everyone to know.
Especially him.
Because he doesn't think he matters.
He doesn't know how much he means to anyone.
And he doesn't know how much he means to me.
So, I sent you something to give to him just in case I don't get to talk to him before you do.
And I'm sure I will, and that I'm just being paranoid, but this is important to me.
It's important that he gets it, and that he reads it, because I'm scared if he doesn't, he'll disappear.
I'm scared that whatever I did to make him leave will keep him distant.
So, I really need this favor from you.
Even though I know it's not something you're 100% okay with.
This isn't about you and me.
This is about him.
Because even if he doesn't call me back, or text me back...or come back...
...he should know he that isn't nothing.
He should know that at some point, for at least one summer, he was somebody's everything.
Talk soon,
-Alex
***
(Thank you guys so much for reading/listening! @kaelking12 did an awesome performance on the audiobook so I hope you tuned in! Next update will probably be next weekend because I have a huge editing project due and I don't think I'll have time to crack out a chapter between now and Tuesday but I will keep you posted! PS: How'd you guys feel about Alex's voicemail?)