Elias
Outgoing Call to Mom at 5:22 PM:
MK: Hola, Corazon! Que tal?
EK: Hey, Mama. I'm walking back to the dorm. Are you busy right now? I need to ask you about something.
MK: I'm cooking, but I always have time for you. What's up?
EK: Remember that plan we talked about a couple weeks ago?
MK: Of course I do! Did you ask her yet, mijo? You're running out of time.
EK: I know! I know! I'm going to ask her right now but I wanna make it nice, you know? I haven't taken Alex on a date in almost two weeks and she's been spending more and more time with Indigo lately, so I have a lot of lost time to make up for.
MK: Two weeks!? Is she an antique or your girlfriend? You better bring that girl some roses before your love life starts sprouting cobwebs, mijo! When's the last time you two spent quality time together?
EK: I don't want to talk about it.
MK: Elias?!
EK: I've been busy okay?! You don't know how bad things have been down here. I spend so much time on the phone trying to figure out how to protect her that I barely have time to enjoy being with her. I'm about as sick of this publicity bullshit as she is!
MK: Language, Eli!
EK: I'm sorry. I'm just freaking out and I'm supposed to pull off the question of the century tonight and I feel like I'm gonna blow it.
MK: Question?! What question? The question?
EK: No, Mama, the other question.
MK: Oh, don't surprise me like that! I saw my future nietos for a second and I got excited.
EK: Mama, believe you me, when it's time to ask her that question, you will be the first to know.
MK: I better be.
EK: You will. Anyway, I really need your help for tonight or else tomorrow I'm gonna be super depressed.
MK: Don't say that, honey. No matter what things will be fine. You're a romantic so I know whatever you do, she'll love.
EK: Are we talking about the same girl here? Jersey's not like that. Half the lovey dovey things I try to do for her blow up in my face.
MK: That's because your timing is horrible.
EK: Mama!
MK: Es veridad (It's true). If you were my boyfriend--
EK: Please don't say that. It's weird.
MK: --let me finish, I'm making a point. Look, mijo, if I were her and you hadn't really spent time with me in two weeks, I'd expect you to bring me the moon and the stars to win me over again. Comprende?
EK: Si, pero (Yes, but) how do I do that?
MK: Bring her flowers and chocolates or something. That usually works wonders.
EK: She's worried about the freshman 15, Mama. Chocolates will just make her sad.
MK: Okay, then just walk into your room, sit her down, look her right in the eye, and ask her what you're going to ask her.
EK: What if she says no?
MK: She won't. She loves you.
EK: Yeah, but she could still say no!
MK: Then FaceTime me and I'll show her everything she'll be missing if she turns you down.
EK: It'll kill me if she doesn't go for this, Mama. I've been having nightmares about her rejecting me all week. She's unpredictable like that.
MK: Life's unpredictable, Eli. But you still have to make the most of it while you can.
EK: I'm trying. I'm just scared. She scares me, okay?
MK: I know. All the best women do.
EK: Yeah, but every time I have to ask her about big things, I lose it. Do you remember how many times I called you for advice before I asked her to be my girlfriend again?!
MK: That wasn't me, Eli, that was Dan.
EK: It was?
MK: Si (Yes), he told me you kept blowing up his office line having panic attacks about the whole situation. He said it was cute.
EK: You know what's not cute? My therapist spilling my anxiety stories to my mom. That's illegal, you know!
MK: Calmate (Calm down), Eli. He only told me because he knows I worry about you when you don't call.
EK: I call you all the time, Mama!
MK: Now, but when things are bad you disappear. Dr. Dan is my only lifeline to you sometimes, honey.
EK: I know. I'm sorry. I just don't want you worrying about me all the time, so I let Dan do it for you. Fair trade.
MK: Elias!
EK: I'm kidding. Anyway, I'm at my dorm now. Should I run and get flowers and come back or just walk in and ask her?
MK: Baby, you're loud. She probably already heard you clomping up the stairs, so just go in and ask her. Everything will be fine. Things always turn out fine.
EK: You sound like Dan right now.
MK: I do? That's funny.
EK: Yeah. Whatever. Anyway, I love you. I miss you and keep your phone on. I might call you back in the next ten minutes crying when she says "no".
MK: She won't say no. I have a feeling about these things. Now, go be the man I know that you are and sweep her off her feet.
EK: I'll try. Thanks, Mama. I don't know what I'd do without you.
MK: Igualmente (The same to you). Good luck, mijo!
EK: Yeah, I'm gonna need it.
Call ended.
***
You know that one Eminem song where he talks about sweaty palms, puked up spaghetti, and all that other shit that people with anxiety issues think about? Yeah, that's kinda how I feel right now.
I mean, it's not like I haven't had to ask Jersey big time questions before. Last time I did something like this I just about had a heart attack trying to work up the balls to go through with it. And that's the thing.
Asking a girl out is about as scary as it gets when you're a guy.
Especially if the girl you're asking means what Jersey means to me.
I didn't know if she'd come to my reading, hell I didn't even know if she'd agree to go out on the town after midterms. She's usually pretty cranky when she's tired and I steer clear of all major requests when she needs to snooze.
But that day, I had to max out all the cajones I had to ask her if she wanted to get back together again.
And it worked.
And things have been great, it's just now I'm back in a place where I have to ask her another one of those big-ass relationship questions.
And I'm scared outta my damn mind.
You think I'd be used to this by now.
Used to manning up and throwing requests her way. But I'm not.
I don't know if I ever will be.
The thing is, I've stood outside Jersey's door more times this year than I can remember. Whether it was me watching her walk off with Kai, or waiting for her to stumble out in that little black dress she wore on Social Night, waiting for her is always a rush. A gamble. I don't know what to feel or how I'll feel whenever she opens her door.
And right now, my heart's a couple thumps away from beating itself to pieces.
But my mom's right. I gotta do this now.
Before time gets away from me like it always does.
I lift my fist up to the door and it takes at least ten knocks for me to get a rumble and thud of an answer from the inside. The lock clicks open, and regardless of how nervous I am to see her, suddenly she appears in the doorway. Hair flattened on one side from her afternoon nap, eyes puffy and tired, lips swollen from sleeping face down on her pillow.
I remember the old version of me, the joke of a guy I was in high school just looking to sleep with the shallowest girls I could find. I wanted the magazine types, the Instagram Queens, the make-up fake-up knockouts who knew how paint and polish their skin until the only thing real about them was how superficial they were. I thought those were the "it girls", that they were the end goals, and that if I could just put enough notches on my belt, that I'd be happy. That I'd feel more whole.
But that was total bullshit. And I know that now, because standing here, outside of my girlfriend's door, staring at all the imperfect things that make her, her--the things that made me fall for her, I don't feel hollow anymore.
And it's not because of conquest, or cockiness, or anything like that. It's because I love her down to the details. The ones she hates. The ones she thinks should gross me out or turn me off. The parts of her she tries to hide.
But she could hover in front of me in her wrinkled, oversized t-shirt, with all her "flaws" and that helpless look on her face, and still make me nervous.
She could rattle my nerves with something as simple as a sleepy, sideways stare, like she is right now.
I watch her eyes slowly make their way up to mine and my whole body goes numb.
I lose control of my hands, and arms, and lips.
And before I know it, I'm holding onto her as softly as I can, lowering my mouth to hers, and within seconds of starting that kiss-- it hits me.
The way I'll make my absence up to her.
The way I'll turn this nervous mess of a night into something magical.
The way I'll ask her the question.
I pull away from her slowly, step back, turn on my heels, bolt down the stairs and out of the building without saying a word.
The confusion on Jersey's face flashes across my mind as I sprint away from Canyon Point. So I do the one thing I never could all the other selfish times I ran out on her before, I take out my phone and text her an explanation.
Text Message to Jersey:
EK: You want another kiss like that? Come find me ;).
J: Find you where? I'm tired.
EK: Tired enough to turn me down?
J: Potentially.
EK: Hey! I'm trying to set up a spontaneous date with you for the first time in two weeks and you're gonna say no?
J: What if I have other plans?
EK: Nobody else's plans matter more than a King's. Quote me.
J: Oh, excuse me, your highness, how could I forget :P. Where are you?
EK: That's for me to know and you to figure out. First clue will be outside your door in t-minus five minutes.
J: What kind of clue?
EK: Not knowing is half the fun.
J: Loser.
EK: Oh, and wear something sexy. Not that I don't love you in your PJ's but we may or may not have an audience.
J: Audience?! What audience?
EK: The most important one in the world. See you soon, J.
***
(Thank you guys once again for taking the time to read, listen, and vote for the chapter! It's awesome seeing so many of you quoting the chapters on Twitter etc. We can't wait to share the next one with you! It should be up this weekend! We'll keep you posted!)
PS: BONUS QUESTION OF THE WEEK: What do you think Elias has planned? Post your guesses in the comments below! The most creative/interesting will get a follow!