I got home really late post filming on Friday night and only dropped Joong a quick text to check in on him but there was no response. I figured he was sleeping and left it at that. The next day, we all reported at 9am to get our hair and makeup done and a final practice before our debut act.
I watched as Joong got his hair and makeup done but the nervousness seeping through. Once he was done, he came towards me to go to his bag, and I held onto his hand. He looked at me, his eyes even more accentuated by the light eyeliner and carefully tousled hair which played up his looks even more.
"It will be fine. You are doing great, remember that." Joong nodded. The next few hours were a blur as we got ready to deliver our acts. It was terrifying but we all did so well and going by the response of the audience, they really loved it so much too! As each of us took our own individual bow, the audience erupted into loud applause and cheers! I do not know if Joong realized it, but he had received the loudest cheers and applause! We took one final bow before walking offstage to go back to our dressing room. All of us stepped into the room and looked at each other and started squealing like some excited fan club! We hugged each other, congratulating ourselves on a job well done! Aou held onto me tightly and Santa even kissed my cheek! I just laughed as I let go of him and turned to Joong who was just standing there quietly waiting for me.
"You, ok?" I asked. He nodded, just coming forward to give me a brief hug thanking me for believing in him. I did not say anything and just held on for a bit before he pulled away, but I had noticed his teary eyes as he walked away. The other two boys were preoccupied and did not notice anything. I watched as he grabbed a change of clothes and said he was going to change and come back. The other two just nodded their heads. I decided to go check on Joong and slipped out, looking for him. I saw him sitting right near the vending machine, just looking out into blank space.
"Joong.." I called out. He looked up, saw me and quickly stood up plastering on a smile that barely reached his eyes.
"Are you ok?" He nodded yes, smiling.
"Stop lying to me. You think I cannot tell if you are lying?"
Joong looked at me before he just broke down. I just ran forth covering the gap between us and hugged him tightly.
"What is going on? Did something happen?" I was starting to worry seeing him cry. He just held onto me tightly murmuring, "I.. I did not expect that response earlier from the audience. I have been so hard on myself, but I realized the audience, they are really so kind. They accepted everything we gave them wholeheartedly and it was just touching to see them being so supportive. I do not know what I was expecting but that, I did not. It... it made everything seem so worth it. And you... if you have not been there for me, I do not know if I could have pulled through that performance."
"We are bandmates, colleagues and friends, Joong. I will always be there for you, and I did tell you are doing well. You need to have more faith in yourself. You did well today." Joong cried harder hearing that. I never realized he could be such a softie, and it was starting to tickle my heart. We pulled away from each other and he looked at me. We were actually evenly matched in height but for some reason, this fellow just looked tiny today.
"You feeling better now?" Joong nodded, this time his smile shining in his eyes too.
"Good. Go change and come back. We are going to go have supper together! Let's celebrate. We deserve it."
Joong went off to change while I just watched him go off. This guy was way softer than he let on. Why did I feel like I was seeing a new aspect of him only now?