18

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Seonghwa’s POV

The morning sun filtered through Seonghwa’s curtains, but the warmth did little to ease the cold knot of fear sitting in his stomach. He’d barely slept, tossing and turning all night, thinking about what lay ahead. Today was the day he would finally reveal himself as Hongjoong’s secret admirer. The thought sent a shiver down his spine, a mix of excitement and pure, unadulterated terror.

Seonghwa sighed, staring at the ceiling. *What if this ruins everything?* The idea of confessing to Hongjoong was both thrilling and terrifying. The fear of rejection was like a heavy weight pressing down on his chest, making it hard to breathe. He could already imagine the awkwardness, the potential for disaster.

But deep down, he knew he couldn’t back out now. He had come too far, poured too much of himself into those letters to just give up. With a shaky breath, Seonghwa forced himself out of bed. As he got dressed, his hands trembled slightly, fumbling with the buttons of his shirt.

"It’ll be fine",he tried to reassure himself. "It’s just Hongjoong. You’ve been friends forever."

But that was exactly why he was so scared. If Hongjoong didn’t return his feelings, it could change everything between them.

When he finally made it to the kitchen, his breakfast sat untouched in front of him as he stared into space, his mind still running in circles. The sound of footsteps broke through his thoughts, and he looked up to see Wooyoung entering the room, his usual playful grin in place.

“Morning, Seonghwa!” Wooyoung greeted, though his smile faltered slightly when he noticed the pale, anxious look on Seonghwa’s face. “Whoa, you look like you’ve seen a ghost. What’s up?”

Seonghwa tried to smile, but it was weak. “Just… nervous.”

Wooyoung’s eyes lit up with understanding, and he quickly took a seat beside Seonghwa. “Ah, the big reveal today, huh? I figured that might be it. Are you excited?”

“I’m more terrified than excited,” Seonghwa admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “What if… what if he doesn’t feel the same?”

Wooyoung waved a hand dismissively. “Hongjoong would have to be crazy not to like you back. You’re literally one of the sweetest people on the planet. Trust me, it’ll be fine.”

Before Seonghwa could respond, Yeosang entered the kitchen, his calm demeanor instantly soothing. He poured himself a glass of water and leaned against the counter, giving Seonghwa an encouraging smile.

“Wooyoung’s right, you know,” Yeosang said softly. “You’ve done something incredibly brave by putting your feelings out there. No matter what happens, you should be proud of that.”

“Yeah, but what if I ruin everything?” Seonghwa asked, his voice tinged with fear.

Yeosang shook his head. “You won’t ruin anything. You and Hongjoong have been friends for so long. Even if things don’t go the way you hope, I’m sure you two will work it out.”

Just then, Yunho burst into the kitchen, full of energy as usual. He immediately noticed the tense atmosphere and plopped down next to Seonghwa, slinging an arm around his shoulders.

“Why so serious?” Yunho teased, though his tone was gentle. “You’re about to confess to the guy you’ve been crushing on forever! You should be excited, not scared.”

Seonghwa groaned, burying his face in his hands. “Easier said than done.”

Yunho chuckled and ruffled Seonghwa’s hair. “Look, no matter what happens, you’ve got us. We’ll be right there to support you.”

“Exactly,” Wooyoung chimed in. “And if things get awkward, we’ll just have to tease you both until you’re forced to make up.”

Seonghwa couldn’t help but laugh at that, the tension in his chest easing just a little. “You guys are terrible.”

“But you love us anyway,” Yeosang said with a small smile.

“Yeah, I do,” Seonghwa admitted, feeling a rush of gratitude for his friends. With them by his side, maybe today wouldn’t be as terrifying as he feared.

---

★

Dear Hongjoong,

It's time. Time for you to know who I am. I've been waiting for this moment for so long, and I can't wait to finally meet you.

Meet me at the school fountain after class today. I'll be there, waiting for you. I hope you'll come, and I hope you'll give me a chance.

With all my heart,

Secret admirer

★

Hongjoong’s POV:

Across town, Hongjoong sat at his desk, staring at the letter in his hand. His heart raced as he reread the familiar handwriting, the words almost glowing with anticipation.

“It’s time. Time for you to know who I am. Meet me at the school fountain after class today.”

He had received letters from this mysterious admirer for weeks, each one more heartfelt than the last. At first, he had been confused, then intrigued, and now, he found himself looking forward to each new letter. The idea that someone out there cared for him so deeply made his heart swell with warmth.

But now that the moment of truth had arrived, he couldn’t help the anxiety gnawing at his insides. Who could it be? The possibilities raced through his mind, each one more surprising than the last. He had tried to guess the identity of his admirer, but none of the names he came up with felt quite right.

“What if it’s someone I never expected?” Hongjoong muttered to himself, turning the letter over in his hands. “Or worse, what if it’s all a joke?”

“Talking to yourself again, Joong?” San’s voice interrupted his thoughts, and Hongjoong looked up to see his friend leaning against the doorframe, a teasing grin on his face. “That’s not a good sign.”

Hongjoong quickly stuffed the letter into his pocket, feeling his cheeks heat up. “It’s nothing, just… thinking.”

“About your secret admirer, I bet,” San said knowingly, walking over to sit on the edge of Hongjoong’s bed. “You’re finally going to find out who it is, huh?”

Hongjoong nodded, the anxiety creeping back into his chest. “Yeah… I just don’t know what to expect. What if it’s someone I don’t really know? Or someone I never thought of that way?”

Before San could respond, Jongho entered the room, catching the tail end of the conversation. “Sounds like someone’s having second thoughts,” he said with a smirk, sitting down on Hongjoong’s other side. “You’re not going to back out, are you?”

“No,” Hongjoong said quickly, shaking his head. “I’m just nervous. What if this changes everything?”

“Change isn’t always a bad thing,” San pointed out, leaning back on his hands. “Maybe this will be the start of something great. You won’t know until you try.”

Jongho nodded in agreement. “Besides, we’ll be there to make sure everything goes smoothly. If things get weird, we’ll step in.”

Hongjoong couldn’t help but smile at that. “Thanks, guys. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Probably still be moping around trying to figure out who’s been leaving you those letters,” San teased, earning a laugh from Jongho.

“Or worse, you’d be trying to figure out who left them in someone else’s bag,” Jongho added with a grin.

Hongjoong rolled his eyes but couldn’t suppress a smile. “Okay, okay, I get it. I’ll stop overthinking it.”

“Good,” San said, clapping him on the back. “Now let’s get through this school day so you can finally meet your mystery admirer.”

---

The school day dragged on, each class feeling longer than the last. Seonghwa found it hard to focus, his mind constantly drifting back to the upcoming meeting with Hongjoong. His friends kept giving him encouraging smiles and nudges, trying to keep his spirits up, but the anxiety gnawed at him relentlessly.

On the other side of the school, Hongjoong was having a similar experience. Every time he tried to concentrate on his lessons, his mind would wander to the note in his pocket. The mystery of it all was driving him crazy, and the anticipation made it hard to sit still.

Finally, the bell rang, signaling the end of the day. Seonghwa’s heart raced as he gathered his things, his hands trembling slightly. His friends walked with him toward the fountain, offering words of encouragement along the way.

“You’re going to be great,” Wooyoung said, giving Seonghwa a thumbs up.

“Just remember to breathe,” Yeosang added with a reassuring smile.

“And don’t forget to tell us every detail afterward,” Yunho said, grinning widely.

Seonghwa managed a small smile, though his nerves were still jangling. As they approached the fountain, his heart seemed to beat louder with each step.

Meanwhile, Hongjoong was also making his way to the fountain, flanked by San, Jongho, and Yunho. His friends were teasing him relentlessly, trying to distract him from his nerves.

“Think they’ll be holding a bouquet of roses?” San joked, nudging Hongjoong with his elbow.

“Or maybe they’ll be wearing a disguise,” Jongho added with a laugh.

“Maybe they’re more nervous than you are,” Yunho suggested, giving Hongjoong a reassuring smile.

When they reached the fountain, Hongjoong felt his breath catch in his throat. There, standing nervously by the edge of the fountain, was Seonghwa.

The realization hit him like a ton of bricks—Seonghwa was his secret admirer.

- um so i m back and not ded

- 2k words and will continue in the next chapter 😏🏃🏃