here are some things I never told you
there's no one on this earth that I love more than you and grandma
and I think you should know how much some things hurt that you say
grandpa,
I know it's difficult to understand my world
I know you've got your own and it seems right to think in black and white,
but that's just one point of view of so many perspectives
I know you don't like me talking in english, you don't like me praying to God
you don't like me kissing a girl
and
especially you don't like me telling you that people from other countries aren't the major problem of society
or a problem at all
I want to add that seeing two boys kissing and calling them 'schwuchtel' is no okay-thing to do
and it also wasn't fifty years ago just because it was a common thing to say
and
I'm okay if you don't like the scars on my arms, but why do you need to say it every time I visit your house?
with 13 you called me pregnant just because I'm not that skinny type
with 15 you called me a slut because I stayed longer at my girlfriend's house than at home
oh and with 19 you called me crazy because I started going to therapy,
but
surprisingly you were absolutely right for the first time
there's a story behind my scars and a meaning behind the words you sometimes doesn't want to understand
and I know
your world is not mine
but
on the contrary to you
I don't want to correct your way to love, to feel pain, to live
I just wish you'd be able to do the same
cause I am so thankful for the things you and grandma did and still do for me
I know I'd never be the woman I am today without you
you were able to teach me the power to live life
and that's why
no discriminating comment wasn't ever able to change me
you should know that
difference doesn't mean danger
and
changes come with time
still some things can stay the same
for example
that I love you no matter what
and at least I hope you can agree with that