Chapter 20 of 22

to the girl i once loved dearly

i just remember feeling she was perfect.

the most perfect person. and that maybe

just

maybe

i had a chance with this perfect person

i fought for her attention

and received teasings

and i fought her approval

and received perfect love

but

no perfect love is healthy

and i truly gave her

every part of myself.

every part of myself

that i could scrape out of the bottom and throw into her greedy hands

just because i

needed

her praise

and i fed off of making her happy

i stopped caring

if there was anything left for myself

at the end of the day,

because she had all of me

and that's all that mattered.

but what sucked the most

was feeling

like even after all of this

was that i was

never enough

for her.

and i never

want to give all of myself

to someone

who makes me feel like

i'm not enough,

again.