Episode 5 - Causalities

Hi everyone, I am back with another chapter. I couldn't update earlier due to work. This morning I had set out to edit this chapter and I am glad the way it turned out and I hope you do too. I have nearly finished writing season 3, I have a couple of episodes to write. I can't wait to write Rose into the story!

Without anymore babbling, enjoy reading episode 5!

August 1918.

Emma was in the library, already putting Pride and Prejudice down on the table and she stood up to stare out of the window with a good view of the grounds. She had been doing this a lot for the past few months, just staring through the window at the grounds, ruminating...

She didn't know how much time had passed since she had staring past the window when she felt a quick wave of dizziness through her head, it was like her vision was moving funnily and there was a swoop of coldness and the next thing she knew was that she had blacked out...

'Emma?'

'Can you hear me, Emma?'

'Emma!'

Emma's eyes fluttered open and she glanced around to see her parents and Sybil.

'What happened, Emma?' Robert asked her gently, as he sat on the edge of her bed.

Emma winced as she tried to sit up and looked around to see she was in her bedroom, and the sun had gone down.

'I-I don't know. I remembered being in the library and then I felt...dizzy...and a feeling of pure coldness.'

Cora and Sybil glanced at each other.

'What?' Emma asked.

'Just earlier, Mary said she also felt cold out of nowhere.'

The news came in late that night. Everyone knew that someday, something like this could happen. Although everyone prayed that it would never come. Emma was stone cold and frozen on the spot, even her facial expression of neutrality was still.

'I didn't know what else to do when I saw the telegram. I knew it was urgent. So, I hope it was right.' Moseley said shakily, as the family gathered in the small library.

'Quite right,' said Robert, 'Mrs. Crawley won't mind my opening it. The main thing is, he's not dead. Not yet, anyway. "We have patched him up. They're bringing him to the hospital in Downton."

Emma chewed the inside of her mouth.

'When do they think he'll get here?' Cora asked Robert worriedly.

'It doesn't say.'

'But how do we contact Isobel? And how will she get back?'

'One thing at a time. I'll ring the war office in the morning.' Robert soothed his wife.

'Maybe they know she's out there. Perhaps she's with him now.'

Emma shook her head and said emotionlessly, 'They wouldn't have sent a telegram here, and she'd have rung.'

'No, it's the usual bulls—usual mess up, I'm afraid.' Robert said, agreeing with Emma.

'Ahem. Beg pardon, my lord. But we're all very anxious to know the news.' Carson asked, nodding his head over to the staff waiting outside of the room.

'Yes, of course.'

Robert walked over to the door where the servants are gathered.

'It appears that a few days ago, Captain Crawley and Major Montgomery were wounded. It's serious, I'm afraid, but he's alive and on his way home to the hospital in the village.'

'Where there's life, there's hope.' Mrs. Hughes said.

'What about William? Is he all right?' Daisy asked timidly.

'I'll find out what I can tomorrow. I'm not sure there's much more we can do tonight.'

'William's father would have had a telegram if anything had happened.' Bates said.

'I'll drive over in the morning.'

Robert nodded to Carson and everyone left. Mary went over to her father and said, 'Whatever you discover, tell me. Don't keep anything back.'

Robert kissed Mary's cheek and she left.

Emma swallowed and she held her head high and walked over to her father and placed a comforting hand on his arm.

'Get some sleep, Papa, you'll need your strength for tomorrow.' Emma said.

Robert looked over at his daughter and gave a weak smile.

'As should you, darling girl. We don't know what has happened, but we better brace ourselves for the morning.'

Emma sighed and placed a kiss on his cheek and left the library.

Emma awoke early in the next morning. She was determined to go to the Hospital and help with aiding James. She dressed herself in a simple white shirt and a grey skirt and she took her bag and collected a few things that she could use later to keep occupied. She had just grabbed her Midsummer's night dream book when she heard someone come in.

'I wanted to take some things down to the hospital, then I could wait and sit with him until he and Cousin Matthew arrive. I've studied that it is vital not to leave them alone when they're first wounded, so no signs go unnoticed. They can't spare nurses to watch over every man.'

'Your mother had written to Grace and Lavinia.' Robert said.

Emma glanced up at her father and she asked, 'Is Mary going to the Hospital?'

Robert nodded, 'Yes, she is going to try and aid Matthew's health.'

'Good, I can catch the same ride as her.'

Emma's jaw locked at the thought of Grace. She was a little upset at her mother for writing to Grace, although James was engaged to her, not Emma.

'It was polite of Mama to write to Grace. She should know.'

Emma saw her father giving her a sympathetic expression.

'Anyways, I'll ring before I head back.' She said passively, and she walked out of the door with her bag.

Just as she reached downstairs, she heard her grandmother's voice speaking loudly and she was a little curious at what her grandmother was saying, so she leaned over a pillar and listened.

'Yes! Ye- the minister! Do- Well, how many Marquess of Flincher are there? Y- Wh—Is this an instrument of communication or torture? Well- Hello? D- Shrimpy? Y- It's Aunt Violet! Y- Very well, very- Y- And Susan? Y- Oh, well g- good. Good- I won't beat about the bush, dear. Who might we know on the board of Leeds General Infirmary?'

Emma shook her head and she saw Mary, dressed simply, and they both went over to the garage where Branson was and he had taken them straight to the Hospital.

Emma was filling a pitcher with water when Dr. Clarkson came in and said, 'Right. They're here.'

'May I stay to settle him in?' Sybil asked.

'Very well.' Dr. Clarkson nodded.

'We want to help, too.' Emma said, putting the pitcher down on the dresser table.

Dr. Clarkson hesitated at the door before striding towards Emma and Mary.

'Lady Emma, I appreciate your good intentions, but I'm concerned that Captain Crawley's and Major Montgomery's condition may be very distressing for you. Might I suggest that you hang back until the nurses have tidied him up a little?'

'I'm not much good at hanging back, I'm afraid. We won't get in your way, I promise.' Mary said.

'However, we will stay,' said Emma, gesturing to Mary and herself, 'You have volunteers, don't you? Well, that's what we are. Volunteers.'

'All right. Everyone to their posts!'

Lady Sybil said to Emma and Mary, 'You stand there.'

Emma stood where Sybil indicated and watched as Matthew's body in a stretcher came in. he was white as a ghost, covered in scratches and his eyelids were bruised and he was lowered to the bed.

Emma and Mary went over to him instantly.

'Take him under his feet,' Sybil instructed her two older sisters.

Emma and Mary did so and helped to lift him off the stretcher and onto the bed.

'Cousin Matthew? Can you hear me?' Sybil asked clearly.

'He is breathing, but he's not been conscious since we've had him. They filled him full of morphine, same with the Major.'

'Thank you.'

The ambulance driver left and Emma turned to see the second stretcher coming in.

Emma helped the officers transfer James's body onto the bed next to Matthew and she looked over at his injuries her body went ice cold.

'Oh my God.' Emma whispered.

James's face was battered with black and blue bruises and especially his eyes.

Emma turned to glance at her sisters.

'What does it say?' Emma asked Mary, who was holding a label attached to Matthew's clothing.

'Possible spinal damage.'

'It could mean anything,' Sybil reassured, 'We'll know more tomorrow morning.'

Sybil picked up Matthew's uniform and a small stuffed toy that Emma recognised from her youth fell out.

'What's this doing here?' Sybil asked, picking up the dog.

'I gave it to him for luck.' Mary

'If only it had worked,' Sybil remarked.

'He's alive, isn't he?' Emma said, then she turned to James and she took the label into his hands and turned it and gasped.

'Emma?' Sybil asked.

'The label...it said,' Emma started but she couldn't find the words to them.

'Yes?'

Emma dropped the label and turned to her sisters and said, 'Potential blindness.'

That evening, Emma and Mary arrived back at Downton and Emma went to one of the guest rooms where she was told by Carson that William was in the guest bedroom. Emma knocked timidly and she went inside and saw Edith tending to William. Mr. Mason and Mr. Patmore watching William sleeping with raspy breaths.

'I came by to see William,' Emma whispered gently, 'How is he?'

'H-He won't make it,' said Edith, 'He only has days...'

Emma nodded and glanced sympathetically at William.

'Why don't you go home now, Mr Mason? We'll see you tomorrow.' Edith said.

'Are you sure you don't mind sitting up with him?' Mr. Mason asked Edith.

'He won't be alone. Not for a moment. I promise.'

Mr. Mason glanced at his son.

'He looks so perfect, lying there.'

Mr Mason left the room.

'But he does look perfect.' Mrs. Patmore said softly, 'Are you sure they've got it right?'

'I'm afraid so. If only I weren't.'

The next morning, Emma and Mary went back to the hospital where they saw Matthew was awake and they had arrived in time to see the bed was cordoned so the doctor and Matthew had privacy. Mary insisted in being there with Matthew and Dr. Clarkson had no objections, so Emma went over to James and saw he was still unconscious. Emma desperately wished he would awake soon. She held his cold hand and heard boots footsteps coming close and Emma saw Robert staring at James sympathetically.

'He hasn't awakened yet.' Emma said, keeping her eyes on James.

'My darling...' Robert started.

'I'm not leaving him,' said Emma, her eyes brimmed with tears, 'I want to be here when he's awake.'

'I know.' Robert said gently and he placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

Emma blinked and sniffled and she said, 'We should see Matthew.'

She stood up and they both peeked over through the screen and saw Dr. Clarkson examining Matthew's spine.

'Do you feel that?'

Matthew nodded 'Mm-hmm.'

'What about that?' Dr Clarkson asked, his hand over his lower back.

'No.'

Robert opened the screen and Mary looked up and saw someone behind Emma. She turned and saw Lavinia across the room.

'And that? Mm?'

'No, nothing.'

'Nothing at all?'

Emma, Mary and Robert went over to Lavinia and Mary smiled comfortingly at her as she took her hands and kissed her cheek.

'Do they know any more yet?' Lavinia asked Mary anxiously.

'They're examining him now.'

'So he's conscious?'

'Just about.' Emma said when Mary didn't answer.

'Have they found out what happened?' Robert asked his daughter.

'A shell landed near them. The explosion threw Matthew against something and James screamed out in pain.'

'Go on.'

Mary hesitated and said, 'Dr Clarkson thinks...there may be trouble with his legs.'

Emma's mouth dropped at the same time as Dr Clarkson joined them.

'Well?' Robert asked anxiously.

'Not good news, I'm afraid. I'd say the spinal cord has been transacted. That it is permanently damaged.'

'You mean he won't walk again?' Robert asked earnestly.

'If I'm right, then no, he won't.'

Lavinia burst out crying and Robert had put a comforting arm around her shoulders and Emma's shoulders sagged and her heart dropped.

'It's a shock, of course, and you must be allowed to grieve, but I would only say that he will, in all likelihood, regain his health. This is not the end of his life.'

'Just the start of a different life.' Mary said uneasily.

'Exactly. Lord Grantham, I wonder if I might have a word.'

Robert stepped into the corridor with Dr Clarkson and Emma and Mary stepped forward to comfort Lavinia.

'Have you got a handkerchief? I never seem to have one in a moment of crisis.' Lavinia cried. Mary pulled one out of the pinny she was wearing.

'Thank you.' Lavinia blubbered and gathered herself and she walked bravely toward the screens around Matthew and Robert returned as Mary made a step toward them.

'Give them a moment together.' Robert said softly to Mary.

Mary nodded, then she asked, 'What was Clarkson saying?'

'Nothing to worry you about.'

An hour later, Matthew went back to sleep, Lavinia left the hospital whilst Mary stayed to continue nursing Matthew and Robert left soon after. Emma was back at James's side and she saw he was stirring from his bed and groaning. Emma was resting her head at his bed when she heard him and she stood straight up and called for Dr. Clarkson. Emma watched closely as James's familiar blue eyes appeared and Emma nearly burst out crying.

'James? James? Can you hear me?' Emma asked tenderly, squeezing his hand.

'Hmm?'

James narrowed his eyes at the ceiling and Emma saw his eyes weren't the exact same familiar blue she adored, his eyes were slightly lighter.

'Emma?'

Emma nodded and gripped his hand and said, 'Yes, it's me.'

'Where am I?' James asked, his eyes still staring at the ceiling.

'You're at the Downton Cottage Hospital, you're safe.' She said.

Emma saw heard the screen opened and she saw Dr. Clarkson with a clipboard.

'Lady Emma, I would need to ask Major Montgomery some questions, can I ask you to give us a little privacy?'

Emma nodded and she stood up.

'I'll still be here,' Emma murmured to James.

'Good...' James mumbled.

Emma left them in privacy and she saw Mary wiping Matthew's brow with a cloth gently, then she glanced at her sister and asked, 'How is he?'

Emma sat next to Mary and stared at Matthew.

'He's awake, Dr. Clarkson is examining him.'

'That's good,' said Mary.

Just then, there was hurried footsteps and Emma turned to see it was Grace, looking rather panicked and she stopped when she saw Emma. Emma stood up and went over to her and she noticed Grace's red eyes and she hugged her.

'Oh Emma,' she said, 'Where is he?'

Emma swallowed and she said, 'Dr. Clarkson is just asking him questions.'

Grace nodded and she glanced down, 'He's awake?'

'He is.'

The screened opened and Dr. Clarkson came over to them and he had a grave expression.

'How is he?' Emma asked the doctor anxiously.

'It's not good... I had given him an examination and it turns out he has lost his sight.'

Grace gasped and her face had whitened.

'He's blind?'

Dr. Clarkson nodded, 'the shell exploded and some degree of blast damage had gotten into his eyes.'

'But, you can do something, right? It's not permanent?' Emma asked hopefully.

'There is a small percentage of chance that he could regain his eyesight. It has been known that causalities had experienced blindness and regaining their sight. But I wouldn't want to give high hopes in case it will not happen.'

Emma nodded and Grace whimpered.

'Emma, could you leave us be, I would like to be alone with James.' Grace asked.

Emma glanced at Grace, almost annoyed and a little envious that Grace wanted to spend his waking hours with him.

She nodded and left to be with Mary and Matthew.

An hour later, Emma saw Grace left without saying a word and Dr. Clarkson went back inside to re-examine James and Emma hovered anxiously behind the screen. A few minutes passed and Emma waited and she felt a comforting hand on her back and saw it was Mary.

Dr. Clarkson came out and he avoided Emma.

Mary and Emma exchanged glances and Emma stepped inside the small private area and she saw tears pouring down his eyes.

'James?'

'Emma?'

Emma went over to him and held his hand.

'Where's Grace?' Emma asked.

'She wanted to go and unpack.' He said groggily. 'How's Matthew and William?'

Emma sighed, 'Matthew survived, although it seems he may never walk again... and William is not doing well. He only has hours left.'

'He saved me,' James said, his eyes still staring in front blankly, 'William saved Matthew and I.'

'I know. Matthew told me. Mary's with him now.'

'I don't what's going on with my eyes, I can't see clearly, but I can make out some blur... there is some dark blur. Did Dr. Clarkson say what it could be?'

Emma swallowed and she sat straight on her chair, 'We should wait for Dr. Clarkson to come back and maybe he would explain everything.'

'Emma,' said James, 'Please tell me.'

'I-You haven't been here for a full day yet, nothing is set in stone. Right now, you need to rest.'

'Emma.'

Emma glanced down and chewed her bottom lip before telling him. 'Dr. Clarkson said your eyesight is damaged, and...there is a possibility of permanent blindness had occurred.'

'How long will it take to recover my eyesight?'

'You can't expect them to put timings on that sort of thing.' Emma said weakly.

'But he did say it would get better? In time?'

'He says the first task is to rebuild your health, and that's what we have to focus on.'

James didn't say anything.

'And he says there was no reason why you should not have a perfectly full and normal life.'

'Only as a blind man.' James said resentfully.

Emma's lip trembled and she stood up and said, 'I haven't had anything to eat, would you like something as well?'

'Thank you for telling me. I know I'm...bawling like a child, but I truly mean it. I'd much rather know than to live in falsities.'

Emma sniffled and said, 'I know. Besides, bawl all you want. You've been through hell.'

'Can I ask you something?' he said.

'Of course, anything.'

'Can you ask Grace to come back, there is something I need to ask of her.'

Emma left quickly and she finally cried when she left the room.

That night, Emma heard sniffles coming from Grace's bedroom at the end of the corridor and Emma knocked and stepped in.

'Grace?'

Emma finds Grace crying in bed.

'Go away,' said Grace, wiping her tears.

'What happened?' Emma asked reassuringly, placing a hand on Grace's shoulder but Grace shrugged it off.

'How can you show your face to me? After when I found this?' Grace said angrily.

Emma was stunned at Grace's behaviour and she saw Grace pulled out a familiar silver ring. It was a little dirty and a bit dented.

'Oh,' said Emma, she took the ring and saw her name on it. 'I gave it to him a long time ago.'

'Do you love him?' Grace asked bluntly.

Emma glanced up at Grace and saw her serious expression.

'You must understand that-'

'Do you or do you not?' Grace asked persistently.

Emma didn't say anything. She didn't want to reveal her feelings for James, not to Grace.

'James's told me to go home. He says he won't see me again. He feels he has to set me free, as he put it. I've tried to tell him I don't care, but he won't listen.'

'Then you must keep telling him.'

'Yes, but you see, it isn't just not his eyesight. Today he told me we couldn't get married, he said he wouldn't be able to see me in my wedding dress, to see our child, or even tailor fabric into clothing. He wants me to forget him. But I can't.'

Emma sat on the bed as she tried to process this news.

'And he feels it would be a crime to tie me down, to tie down any woman to a blind man. He thinks I'd hate him in the end. I'm sorry if I've shocked you, but there's no one else I could talk to about it, and when you came in, I—'

'I'm not shocked. I'm just astonished. And greatly poignant.'

'I'll die if I can't be with him.' Grace said.

Emma felt her phrasing was strong and clear, hen she remembered how she felt. They day they broke up and Emma felt a part of herself was gone, after four years, if never came back.

'I must ask you something, I want to you stay away from him.'

Emma saw the envious expression.

'I'm only nursing him,' said Emma, 'I'm not that kind of woman to come in between a man and a woman who are set to be married.'

Grace shook her head.

'Sometimes I feel like we are competing for him. I know you have feelings for him, your eyes say everything...but James doesn't want anyone to be with him, let alone a woman.'

Emma frowned, 'He should be able to tell that to me, not you...'

'Regardless, you have been doing so much for him, you should take a break. I'm his fiancé, even though he has broken ties and he's in a dark hole, I will marry him when he sees sense.'

The next morning, Grace left the house and Emma had just sat down next to Edith when she had helped herself to bacon, eggs and fried tomatoes when her father was reading the paper.

'I saw Grace leaving early, did something happen?' Mary asked, sipping her tea.

'James broke the engagement off with Grace. She's distraught.' Emma said, unable to look at Mary.

'That makes two engagements are called off,' Mary mused.

'Good God Almighty. "The engagement is announced between Lady Mary Josephine Crawley, eldest daughter of the Earl and Countess of Grantham, and Sir Richard Carlisle, son of Mr and the late Mrs Mark Carlisle of Morningside Edinburgh."

Mary looked at her plate awkwardly as Edith and Emma stared at Mary in shock.

'Is this why you went to see him?' Robert asked, 'Why didn't you say it'd be in today's paper?'

'I didn't know.'

'Well, surely he asked your permission?' Emma insisted.

'I don't think asking permission is his strongest suit.'

Emma was flabbergasted as well as Robert.

'That's very high handed. You can't let him get away with it.'

'Well, it's done now.' Edith stated.

Mr Carson stepped forward.

'What is it?' Robert inquired.

'William's wedding, my lord. If it can be arranged for this afternoon, the indoor staff would like to attend.'

'We don't yet know if Mr Travis will agree to do it.' Robert said.

'I'm afraid he has very little time to make up his mind.'

A tense mood settled around the room at the butler's words. Emma glanced down sadly at her breakfast. She was sad that William was on his deathbed. She closed her eyes and exhaled for a second then she opened her eyes and looked at Carson.

'Carson, can you ask for the motor to come around, I'll talk to Granny, see if she can persuade Mr. Travis to agree marrying William this afternoon.'

'Certainly, Milady.'

Emma was glad that Violet and her plan to corner Mr. Travis to marry William as soon as possible. Emma had telephoned Violet about the dilemma and Violet agreed on calling Mr. Travis to arrive at the Dowager House within the hour, so Emma had to quickly leave. Once she arrived, she saw Mr. Travis was seated across from Violet, with a stern expression.

'I hope I am not too late,' Emma said.

'Not at all, my dear, we were discussing about William's wedding ceremony.'

'This boy is an extremist. How can we know that these are his true wishes? Maybe the kitchen maid somehow hopes to catch at an advantage.' Mr. Travis said.

Emma sat down and asked, 'Well, what advantage would that be?'

'Some widow's dole given by a grateful nation?'

'Mr Travis, can I remind you William Mason has served our family well. At the last, he saved the life, if not the health, of my son's heir. Now he wishes before he dies to marry his sweetheart.'

'Yes, but—'

Emma interjected, 'You cannot imagine that we would allow you to prevent this happening in case his widow "claimed her dole".'

'No, but—'

'I have had an interest in this boy. I tried and failed to save him from conscription, but I will certainly attend his wedding. Is that an argument in its favour?' Violet asked in a portentous tone.

'Of course, but—'

'Finally, I would point out your living is in Lord Grantham's gift. Your house is on Lord Grantham's land, and the very flowers in your church are from Lord Grantham's garden. I hope it is not vulgar in me to suggest that you find some way to overcome your scruples.'

Emma smirked at Violet.

The bed was woven with vines of flowers. Daisy and William held hands. Emma, Edith and Violet attended along with Mr Mason, Anna, Bates, Mrs. Hughes, Carson, Mrs. Patmore, Thomas Barrow, O'Brien, and another maid.

'Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God, and in the face of this congregation to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony, which is an honourable estate, instituted of God in the time of man's innocency, signifying unto us the mystical union of Christ and—'

Emma saw Violet dabbed her eyes with a handkerchief from the corner of her eyes.

'If any man can show any just cause why they may not lawfully be joined together, let him now speak, or else hereafter forever hold his peace.'

William gave Daisy a small smile and she gave one back.

'Hand me the ring.'

Mr Mason pulled the ring out of his vest pocket. Anna and Mr Carson were also on the verge of tears. William had placed the ring on Daisy's finger. Edith saw Violet crying and had put her hand on her shoulder.

Violet sniffled and said, 'Cold.'

'You may now kiss the bride.'

Daisy leaned over the bed and kissed William.

Straight after the wedding, Emma got dressed and she went straight to the hospital where she saw James, all alone on his bed looking pale. Emma explained what had happened between them and James told her that he had broken things between them.

'She's better off back in London without me.'

'If you believe so.'

'Do you know why I broke the engagement?

Emma nodded and said, 'I believe I do.'

'Then you'll know I could never marry her. I couldn't marry any woman, being this this.'

Emma privately disagreed with him and said, 'And if they should just want to be with you? Regardless of any conditions?'

'No one rational would want to be tied down to me. Including myself. Oh, God. I think I'm going to puke.'

Emma picked up the sick bowl and helped James sit up.

'It's all right.'

Emma rubbed his back as James threw sick into the bowl.

'It's better out than in.' Emma said reassuringly.

James lay back down and started to chuckle as Emma wiped his mouth clean.

'What's so funny?' Emma asked with a small smile.

'I was just thinking it seems such a short time ago since I turned you down, and now look at me. Blind and reeking of vomit. What a setback. You have to admit, it's quite comical.'

'Well, I'm not laughing.' Emma said. 'All I'll admit is that you're here and you've survived the war. That's enough for now.'

'It's not enough,' said James.

'There is something you should know...Grace...she found the ring.'

James frowned blankly, 'What ring?'

'The one I gave you, after the concert.'

'Ah... that would explain why she was increasingly more upset.'

Emma rose her eyebrow and muttered, 'As she was with me.'

He frowned and asked, 'What did she say?'

Emma shook her head, 'It's nothing...she was only upset.'

'Emma.' James said in a warning tone.

Emma sighed and said, 'She didn't want me to see you anymore... she said she we were competing for your attention, and that it should be her job to look after you, not me.'

'Well, she's not my fiancé anymore.' He said edgily.

'But did she understand the message?' Emma asked him, and the mood dropped into a uncomfortable manner.

Well, that is a wrap up for episode 5 - Causalities. I was saddened by William's death. He had a heart of gold. Matthew cannot walk and James is blind. I wasn't sure if I should let James be injured, but I thought to be realistic and to let something happen since it was war and there are causalities for soldiers and families. Let me know what you think :)

Feel free to comment, vote, add the story into your libraries <3

Until next time!