Chapter 3: Worst Tutorial EVER

I took a step back as the thing lumbered towards me.

Green, tall, and stringy. Just blades of grass knitted together to form a stocky body which craved my death–probably craved my death. I didn’t take the time to ask it. The legs and arms were disproportionately long compared to the rest of the body, making it just that much freakier, and there wasn’t any real face, just slightly thicker grass forming an oblong head.

Just above its head hung a set of words.

[Grass Clippings]

[Level 0]

If I’d seen this creature in a movie or video game, I might have laughed at the idea of calling it a monster, but being there in real life really put things into perspective.

“Alfie! What the heck! You can’t just spring a monster on me. I’m not ready,” I cried, stumbling backwards from the grass-thing approaching me.

The form reminded me of the fake body some of the younger cousins made from the grass clippings left on the lawn after Grandma took over mowing when Grandpa passed away. Grandma was too old for that kind of chore, but she refused to let anyone help her which is why her lawn had been full of cut grass since she never properly emptied the bag. I was old enough that I didn’t play outside anymore, but my little brother and cousins sure enjoyed playing in the leftovers, from making piles to jump into to having grassball fights–needless to say the balls didn’t hold together all that well, but that never stopped little boys from trying.

The dog-man snorted and said nothing.

“Alfredo! Come on. Get rid of this guy and let me prepare a little first,” I pleaded.

“The best way to learn is by doing. It’s a low level monster, Ms. Madison. I’m confident you’ll perform adequately,” he said, keeping his arms crossed. “And if not, you’ll get there on the next attempt.”

“Next attempt?!? Does that mean I can’t die?” I asked, still moving away from the encroaching grass-being.

“Dying here will reset the tutorial. Dying in the Dungeon will reset you to the start. Mrs. Marks didn’t wish for any permanent harm to come to anyone,” Alfie said with a sigh, almost like he was disappointed that I was guaranteed to come out of this physically unharmed. “And given the unique nature of this Dungeon, there will be no treasure. No risk, no reward.”

That’s not to say that the emotional and mental damage wouldn’t hang around, but at least I could rest assured that I’d someday escape this Dungeon with all my limbs intact.

“There is no escape from this fight, Ms. Madison.” Alfie was several yards away since I’d continued to my trek away from the [Grass Clippings], though the monster remained honed in on me, continually making its way to me.

“I don’t even have a weapon! How am I supposed to kill it?” I pointed out.

“You don’t need a weapon. You have [skills],” the dog-man said.

“Useless ones!”

“I suppose it would be you out of everyone who would insist on doing this the hard way.”

From the corner of my eye, I watched Alfie wave both paws, and then the ground began to shake. I fell to the ground, landing roughly on my behind, but the [Grass Clippings] stayed upright, taking shaky steps towards me.

I crawled backwards, not caring about how ridiculous I must look, with my eyes trained on the monster coming to kill me. My heart nearly stopped when my outstretched hand ran into an impassable obstacle. I turned around to see that circular rock wall now surrounded me and the grass-being, trapping us close together. Alfie stood at the top of the wall, which was high enough and smooth enough that I would never be able to climb out.

“I’m sorry to do this to you, Ms. Madison, but you must fight and complete the tutorial,” the dog-man said, peering down at me from the safety of his wall.

“You suck big time, Alfie.” I glared up at him, but I didn’t have long to drill my rage into him before an arm of grass swung out towards me.

Yelping, I sank all the way to the ground, my arms flying up to protect my head. The edge of the [Grass Clippings’] arm swiped along my arm, causing what felt like a dozen papercuts along my forearms.

I tried to crawl away, but the thing was already taking another swing at me, and I was forced to flatten myself all the way to the ground in the regular non-killer grass.

“[Skills], Ms. Madison. Use your [skills],” the annoying Dungeon-master-dog-reincarnation-jerk said from above me.

As the [Grass Clippings] reached down towards me, I put both hands up and shouted, “[Push].” The fear and desperation coursing through my veins fueled the “clear intent” part of the activation, and I felt the magic dance from my palms.

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The monster flew upwards several feet and then landed four yards away on its back. I scampered up to my feet, keeping my hands pointed at my enemy.

Nervous giggles escaped as I brushed a brown stand of hair from my face that had fallen from my ponytail. “I did it. I actually did–”

The excited words were caught in my throat as the [Grass Clippings] rustled and slowly sat up. This fight wasn’t over yet.

“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me? Isn’t this thing level 0? How is it not dead?” I complained.

“You need to inflict actual damage,” the [Dungeon Manager] advised me.

Actual damage, clear intent. I wished this whole Dungeon would just go jump off a cliff and save me from enduring anymore of this stupidity and danger.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to share my current thoughts about this tutorial with Alfie as I still had a grass-monster coming after me. He made it only a couple of steps before I used [Push] on him again.

He slid backwards through the grass, but he was able to keep his feet, and it hardly slowed him down. How was I supposed to inflict real damage when all I had for skills were [Push] and [Pull]? All that they seemed useful for was kneading bread dough.

I took a breath and glanced around the small arena we were in. One thing I learned from video games was to lean into the environment when facing an overly tough boss. (And yes, I knew that this was only the tutorial, but it was my first time fighting so give me a break, okay?)

Just a ring of stone around a level grassy field. No rocks to fling at it, no columns to hide behind, nothing but the open ground and the stupid walls trapping us inside.

Wait a second, walls! I could use those, right? It would just take some proper positioning and then I could flatten this guy like a bug against the rock. Easy peasy.

I jogged to the side, putting myself dead center of the arena. I then turned back to the [Grass Clippings] and [Pushed] him away. He slid back only seven or so feet, but he was right next to the wall now.

“[Push!]” My [skill] threw him all the way against the wall, plastering him into the stone just like I planned.

Only it didn’t kill him. Sure, he froze up for a second or two, but he still managed to unpeel himself from the rock.

I put my hands back out. “[Push].”

He flung back into the wall.

Maybe I just needed to really steamroll him.

“[Push]. [Push].”

Each use pressed the [Grass Clippings] back against the wall, but it was obvious he was still alive and more or less undamaged. Clearly this was not the solution I’d hoped it would be.

“Alfie, this isn’t working. Let me out of here!” I kept my eyes on the grass-monster who was unsticking himself from the stone.

“You must finish the tutorial, Ms. Madison. That is the rule. Perhaps you should try using your second [skill] as well,” the white furred dog-man said.

I rolled my eyes. “And what? [Pull] him closer? Because that’s so helpful.”

Alfie didn’t say anything, leaving me to figure the solution to this out by myself.

That was fine. I could do this. I just had to pretend it was a really hard test problem, only this one happened to quite literally be a life or death situation.

First things first, what did I know about the problem?

Well, it was a monster made of grass, classified as a level 0, so it couldn’t be that tough to kill. I didn’t have anything sharp or else I’d just cut it since grass wasn’t durable. It was so weak, it could casually be torn apart by hand.

That was it! Torn apart! I couldn’t flatten it to death, but maybe I could rip it apart. Except that this was sharp grass that I couldn’t grab without injuring my hands, and even if I did get a good hold on it, this looked a lot tougher than what someone with [1 Strength] could tear apart.

Alfie had said to use my [skills], specifically to use my second [skill] “as well.”

“Alfie, can I use two [skills] at once?” I asked.

The dog-man huffed. “Yes. You just have to maintain concentration and make sure to use clear–”

“Intent. I understand that part. Thank you!”

I smiled at the [Grass Clippings] shuffling towards me. He was a lot less scary now. More of a nuisance honestly, but one I knew how to rid myself of finally.

Putting both hands out, I positioned them to be stacked, my left pointing at the grass-man’s head and my right pointing at his feet. “[Push]. [Pull].” I trusted the System to understand what I wanted.

A sensation fluttered through both hands–something slightly different in each, but not in a way could I possibly explain–and [Push] from my left hand grabbed his upper body while the [Pull] from my right hand took hold of the lower body.

The [Grass Clippings] was ripped in half, directly at its middle, and immediately he disintegrated into a pile of torn grass strands which scattered throughout the arena.

A small blue box appeared in the corner of my vision with white text, giving me what I took to be notifications.

[Grass Clippings Defeated]

[5 XP Gained]

I threw my hands in the air. “Let’s go! I did it! For real this time!”

The ground shook as the arena walls came down, but I managed to keep my feet.

Alfie walked towards me with a bored look on his face. “Congratulations on defeating your first opponent. This concludes the tutorial.”

The notifications box reappeared.

[Tutorial Complete!]

[20 XP Gained]

[Level Up!]

A chill passed over me, and I looked down to see that the cuts on my arms had healed, leaving the unblemished fair skin as it should be.

“Sweet! That means I'm level 2 now!” I grinned from ear to ear. He hadn’t mentioned that leveling up meant getting automatically healed. That was a great perk. “Thank you for your help by the way.”

The dog-man sighed. “It appeared necessary if I wanted you to ever move on. Now that you are through the tutorial, you will be sent to the waiting room with the other competitors until everyone has arrived. Good luck with your future endeavors.”

“Waiting room?” I asked, but it was too late.

He waved a paw, and the floor beneath me disappeared.