Translator: Callis
The one who was seeking trouble ended up being the one who was troubled. Zong He had never thought that there would be this kind of work between a husband and wife. For a while, he didnât know what he should say.
Tang Wan gently and softly rubbed the big catâs head and casually laughed: âYou donât need to be so angry in the future, drinking vinegar at the drop of a hat. Otherwise, other people ought to call you lemon essence.â
Zong He watched him âba ba baâ speak right in front of him. Whatever he said was correct, and he didnât bother arguing back at all. Hugging Tang Wanâs waist, he held him still in his embrace and resentfully said: âI was thinking too much, you donât have to give it.â
Tang Wan flattened his lips, his face first flushing red. The Marshalâs gaze was too clear, and his grievance was also very clear. In the past, he could decline because the otherâs body wasnât well, but now the otherâs body had become stronger and he was still refusing to perform his marital duties. Tang Wan also felt that he really wasnât a man.
Zong He waited for Tang Wan to give him a word of permission. Tang Wanâs lukewarm temperament was too bothersome. If he didnât encourage him a little, he would be forever unable to take the initiative to step out of his own little defensive circle.
At this time, there was a grumbling sound. Tang Wanâs stomach had taken this inopportune moment to call out. Tang Wanâs face became even more flushed and laughed nervously a few times. âI didnât eat a lot for breakfast.â
Zong He unhappily patted his waist a few times, âEat first, then we can talk after youâve eaten your fill.â He hadnât been able to get a definite answer again. Zong He stood and hauled Tang Wan up, walking past the door. Already this skinny, if he became any skinner he would be invisible.
The corner of Tang Wanâs lips slowly quirked up. Looking at Zong Heâs tall and reliable back, his heart was sweetened. This big cat really hated to see him receive the least bit of blame.
â â â â
When Tang Wan went to eat, the kittens had already completely eaten all of the meat. Mulan took the initiative to take care of the children. She brought the smaller cats out to sun on the balcony and helped lick their fur. The other cats were lazily licking their own paws.
After Tang Wan was full, he returned to take a look and saw that the audience was still watching, spellbound. There wasnât a barrage, but the number of people hadnât decreased a bit. He really was convinced by this group of people. They really could watch for a full day. âYou guys arenât going to rest?â
The audience members replied one after another: No rest! Weâre strong!
You can go back to confess, we donât need you here, just having meng pets is enough!
Tang Wan was speechless. Who was confessing? Did his position in the household need confessing for?
âTen more minutes, then they really need to be withdrawn. Otherwise, I wonât let Xuan Feng sing for you all.â
The audience threw rewards again: Begging! You! Not! To! Close!
The live broadcast mustnât close, the song still needs to be sung!
Tang Wan couldnât help but laugh: âYou all beg a lot.â
Barrage: Thatâs right, weâre honorable!
Tang Wan ridiculed them in his heart: You all have been misbehaving like a mantis shrimp, and still are âhonorableâ.
âFeng ah, come. Sing the brothers, sisters, uncles, and aunties a refreshing song. Sing the song that the strange uncle did when he carried you, the one who danced when he sang. Do you recall the name?â
The audience roared with laughter: Luo Bing Jun!
âCorrect.â Tang Wan profoundly nodded. âYour Uncle Luo.â
The audience screenshotted it and tagged Luo Bing Jun. âTang Tang says youâre a strange uncle, asking your psychological shadow!â
Xuan Fengâs face was blank. It didnât understand what Tang Wanâs long string of requests meant? It could only understand simple commands.
Tang Wan laughed. In the end, it was only as smart as a bird and he didnât need to worry that it would become enlightened. âDonât know how to sing it? Then Uncle Luoâs song just isnât that popular yet. Then you can sing your favorite song and twirl around.â
This time, Xuan Feng understood and trembled in excitement, flying over. âI know, I know!â
When Xuan Feng pretended to be unskilled, Tang Wanâs communication device beeped twice. He opened it, and saw that Bo Li Qiao had already sent over the two million. He also sent him another reminder.
Tang Wan politely responded: Iâve received it, thank you.
Bo Li Qiao: Donât mind it, this is what itâs supposed to be. Thereâs actually something that we want to ask for your help on. We want your cat to act as our companyâs mascot. A yearâs worth of advertising fees would be around ten million. Would you accept?
Tang Wan raised his eyebrows, pleasantly surprised. If he didnât accept it, then he was a fool! However, before they spoke more about it, he couldnât speak so contentedly. Tang Wan asked: Which cat are you looking at? Iâm considering it.
Bo Li Qiao: The chubby child Jin Xiao Pang! Our boss especially likes it!
Tang Wan glanced at Jin Xiao Pang, who was so chubby that it looked like a big dango. This child really was adorable, with universal appeal. He asked: I want to know what work it will be doing when advertising. Is it exhausting?
Bo Li Qiao: Itâs just taking a few pictures. Itâs also okay if youâre the one to take the picture. Our colleague in the advertising department says that your photographic techniques are very good. You can pass it on to me, and we have staff members that specialize in manufacturing billboards. You can rest assured, there wonât be anyone willing to let it suffer any hardships. The amount of money earned will be extremely satisfying.
Tang Wan: We have a contract then?
Bo Li Qiao: Of course! If I defraud you, you can bring an army over to beat me!
Tang Wan held his forehead. There really were too many smart people. Luo Bing Jun also definitely knew his identity.
In this amount of time, Xuan Feng had already finished its song, its success making everyone laugh and applause, thanking Xuan Feng for refreshing them.
Tang Wan saw that the atmosphere was right, then spoke with everyone: âWe really have to end here this time, I need to take a nap.â
Audience: Donât want!!!
You can just go sleep, we donât need you!
Tang Tang, do you want to try for the record of the longest live broadcast? After the challenge, you can apply for the record. Others sing and dance for 24 hours, for you, it would be enough to let the cats out for 24 hours! Wouldnât that be very good???
Tang Wan answered profoundly: âI feel that what you said is very reasonable. I donât have to do it for just 24 hours. I can summon all of the meng pets, and can live broadcast one of them every day. It would be different every day of the week. This really answers Xuan Fengâs words. Who else dares to fight with me?â
The audience clapped one after another: Right right right! Just be this aggressive!
Looking at them speaking, Tang Wan clearly stood up and waved his hands, âThen Iâll go take my afternoon nap.â
This time, it was the audienceâs turn to be stupefied: He really isnât going off line? Just live broadcasting like this?
Is he really challenging the record for the longest live broadcast?
Thatâs not right, he could also be teasing us! Heâs done it before!
Heâs already said it. Anyways, itâs okay to be idle, and itâs fun to tease the fans so he could be teasing us! Weâll be ready for combat, donât relax!
The audience was nervous for half a day. They noticed that Tang Wan hadnât returned, but it was his little assistant who tidied everything up, blankly, wordlessly staring at the camera. He closed the door. They could still quietly watch the cats that had left the room to sleep.
Audience: ......The host really went to sleep!
Weâre the first audience that has been left behind by their host!
Weâll quietly draw ourselves the credentials. Today really is worth commemorating.
......
In the bedroom across the hall, Zong He had transformed into a large cat, drowsily basking under the sun on the balcony. This characteristic of cats couldnât be changed. When they were at home, they just wanted to transform into their original forms and roll around under the sun, relaxing.
Tang Wan walked over and lay down beside Zong He. He first touched the soft, thick blanket, then enthusiastically hugged the big cat, rubbing his face against him~
âI need to add tatami to this spot, then add a cushion and a rug so you can lie comfortably under the sun everyday.â
Zong He lifted his paw and pulled Tang Wan closer into his embrace, then softly licked him twice on the chin. Tang Wanâs ears turned red and he buried his face in Zong Heâs neck and used all of his strength to rub against it, his eyes glinting in laughter. He pouted, âSo dirty, I still need to do a live broadcast in the afternoon!â
Zong He used his paw to pat his head, unhappy like the evasive Tang Wan. Tsundere people really were hard to raise. It clearly was him who had first thrown himself at him. As a big cat who spoiled his partner, the Marshal would take it as his partner being embarrassed and wouldnât argue with him. âLive broadcasting for so long, arenât you tired?â
Tang Wan whispered: âIâm still okay. Anyways, we can make a lot of money.â
For Zong He, looking at Tang Wan was like looking at a little shark. âWhat are you doing, trying to earn so much money?â
Tang Wan cupped the big catâs face and pinched his cheeks, âTo support you ah. If there isnât any money, then you wonât have any meat to eat, youâll starve and then your fur wonât be proper. And you could also get worms and turn into a bald cat.â
Zong He imagined what he would look like bald and his expression darkened.
Tang Wan grinned and told him: âGood Baby Production Company wants Jin Xiao Pang to do advertisements. Theyâre giving ten million a year, enough for all of our familyâs meals. The live broadcast typically generates a little pocket money, and with selling toy designs, supporting you wouldnât be a problem.â
Zong Heâs voice deepened: âYou can sell your cats and just support me.â
âNot selling!â Tang Wan fixed his guarded gaze on the big cat in front of him. âYouâre all the same species, why are you so eager to fry the others? No matter how you say it, youâre their adoptive father, how could you be willing to sell them off?!â
Tang Wanâs emotions were clear: Your heart is dead, you wicked stepmother!
Zong He rubbed against the otherâs chin, âIâm teasing.â
Only then did Tang Wan give him a pleasant expression and explained to him: âAfter all, theyâve been extinct for a long time. If they left me, itâs very possible that they would be taken away and experimented on. I like money, but I donât want just any kind of money.â
Zong He couldnât help but rub against Tang Wanâs face a few more times. Tang Wanâs steadfastness was what moved him the most. No matter how much he was enticed, Tang Wan would remain firm and stand by his decision, adorably stubborn.
Tang Wan went and pulled over a pillow and placed it on top of the blanket. He lay back down beside Zong He and remembered the Crazy Luo Bei he had played video games with. âHow do you feel about the child I told you about at noon?â
Zong He thought about the video: âIf heâs only 16 years old, then heâs a military genius.â
Tang Wan excitedly exclaimed: âThen thatâs too good, quickly seek him out!â
Just when Tang Wan was excited, Lin Bo arrived at the doorway and rang the doorbell, saying through the roomâs broadcasting system: âMarshal, thereâs a person from the palace here to deliver a message.â
When he heard âpalaceâ, Zong Heâs expression turned serious, âWhat happened?â
Lin Bo helplessly said: âThe old Madam and His Majesty got into an argument, wanting to see FÅ«rén. His Majesty had no choice but to send a person over to deliver a message. They want you two to take a trip over.â
Tang Wan blinked. Half a day passed before he reacted and pointed towards his own nose: âYour mother wants to see me?â
Zong He pulled Tang Wan closer to himself, raised his eyebrow and asked: âWhy does my partner have to see her?â
Tang Wan sensed Zong Heâs defensive and nervous manner. He was aware that Zong He and his motherâs relationship was more than just terrible.
Lin Bo tried to pacify him: âIf they donât meet, the old Madam might go find His Majesty and make noise. At the time, the Imperial household would have to step in, and the person that would be embarrassed is FÅ«rén. This time, His Majesty already said that if you go to see her, it would be giving him face.â
Zong He was still in a bad mood, âI have to do what he says?â
Tang Wan admired him, how resolute. Man of steel Zong He, disobeying His Majestyâs words.
Lin Bo couldnât help but laugh, and he whispered: âGive His Majesty a little face ah. In the end, heâs your older cousin, and he liked you a lot when you two were little.â
There was still an expression of anger on Zong Heâs feline face. âIf she wants to go make noise, then she can go make noise. An aunt is still half a mother. Iâm already protecting the empire for him, then gifted him a âmaâ. Tell him that he doesnât need to thank me.â
âPfft!â Tang Wan couldnât bear it, pushed into laughter by his sentence, âAlso gifted a âmaâ hahahaha~â
Being stared at by Zong He, Tang Wan quickly closed his mouth. He wouldnât laugh anymore, Zong Heâs expression really was scary.
Zong He unhappily said: âWeâll talk more after he comes to find me.â
Tang Wan stealthily patted Zong Heâs neck and smoothed downed his fur, âIt doesnât need to be this troublesome. If she wants to meet me, we can meet. Donât make His Majesty unhappy.â
Achievements are greater than the lord. Tang Wan was afraid that His Majesty, who gave his wife a green hat, would give Zong He trouble.
Zong Heâs expression eased slightly, âDonât go. If you go, you could be angered to tears.â
Tang Wan was also a little fearful, âYouâve been angered to tears?â
Zong He gave a cold snort, âI angered her to tears.â
Tang Wan wordless looked at Lin Bo. Just what was the matter between the two?
Lin Bo shook his head. It was difficult to explain in a few words.
Because of Zong Heâs refusal, this matter was dropped for the time being. Tang Wan didnât get his afternoon nap. He lay down for a while, then went to take a peek into the live broadcasting room. The group of people was unexpectedly still there!
Tang Wan wanted to kneel over for them, touching so much that they got addicted!
When Tang Wan returned, the audience knew that he wanted to exit the live broadcast and they all shouted: You donât need to come! Go back and rest! The live broadcast doesnât need you! Just having cats would be enough! We can challenge the live broadcasting record for another week, you can leave!
Tang Wan didnât know whether to laugh or cry. He would be the first host to be driven out by their own audience.
However, these cats still needed to be accompanied and coaxed by people. Tang Wan teased them with a cat stick for a while, and they were all delighted. Then he had no choice but to say goodbye to the audience and left among the audienceâs urges of âYou quickly leave then.â
Tang Wan also thought that being like this was also very good. He didnât need to monitor it in any way; he just needed to let them pet the cats. He could still have a hand on his popularity, such that he didnât need to rely on the audienceâs rewards to pass his days. The advertising fees would be enough to support them for a year. As he became more popular, the advertising fees would also rise. In the future, he could also contact other advertisers, such as the Young Felineâs Special Beautiful Fur Skincare Company, Feline Powdered Milk, Feline Meat Jerky, and Combing Fur Combs. He could use his cats for anything that cats could use.
Tang Wan thought; he didnât just have to do advertisements for cats but could do them for hooved creatures as well. He had Shen Zhu Ge, the short-legged pony, and the mini donkey. They all had hooves, and he could do advertisements for good-quality hoof trimming scissors. With this scheme, Tang Wan felt that his future was bright, and supporting his family wouldnât be a problem.
Tang Wan waited until the evening to check on the live broadcasting room again. The number of people in the audience hadnât decreased, and he couldnât help but ask: âYou guys arenât going to eat?â
There came a string from the barrage: Eating while watching them ah~
Tang Wan shook his head. After feeding the cats, he looked at the clock. âItâs almost 7 oâclock already, and the live broadcast has been running for ten hours already, everyone go rest a bit.â
The audience disagreed: No! We must achieve the magnificent feat of watching the live broadcast for a week! Tang Wan, donât be scared, weâll do it together!
Tang Wan simply sat down, and sincerely and earnestly spoke to everyone: âSay, there are people addicted to the Internet, smoking, and alcohol. In the future, will there be a term âaddicted to catsâ? If you all become so addicted, will I get banned?â
The audience laughed and cried, what kind of damned addiction was this?
âSo,â Tang Wan sat still and upright, solemnly saying, âWeâll finish todayâs live broadcast here; there will be cats to see in the future. Donât let my account get banned.â
Tang Wan worried that something unexpected would happen when he slept at night, when there werenât people there. He returned them all to the system.
Although the audience was still wailing in anguish, they werenât as impassioned as they had been before. They were also tired after watching for a whole day. After hearing Tang Wan, if he said to withdraw, then they would withdraw.
It was also the first time that Tang Wan had done a live broadcast for an entire day. When he counted his rewards, he was shocked. This group of people had given rewards of more than 8 million! After he paid his taxes, he still had 4 million!
With Heavenly Emperor Luo Bing Jun present, adding on the video gameâs big shot âPrevailing Over Buddhaâ, and Tang Wanâs top-notch traffic flow, the three overlords unexpectedly pulled in so many people to give rewards. Tang Wan was quickly moved to tears, thanking the Empireâs people for his meals!
To express his thanks, he pulled out all of the pictures of the meng pets he had taken before, as well as Luo Bing Junâs autographs, and went to Weibo to set up a lottery.
Eating, sleeping, and scolding Da Zhuang: Pulling a total of sixty people. Twenty people will get Luo Bing Junâs autograph, twenty people will get the meng petâs photo album, and twenty people will get ten thousand star coins each. Thank you all for todayâs support, without all of you, I wouldnât be here today. I love you all, heart ~ @Luo Bing Junâs Studio
Luo Bing Jun was dumbstruck.
Xu Mi sighed. See, he had really sold Luo Bing Jun off!
Iâm choosing to split this chapter into two because...its almost 9k (aka 3 chapters worth) characters and Iâve never suffered more so yâall better enjoy this ã»ãã»(ãÐ`)
In the future, anything longer than 6k will be split in half for my sanityâs sake.
Also, the next half of the chapter requires a slight trigger warning so I decided to split here.