Chapter 11

SABINA

I held my breath as strong hands forced my head under the icy water. The cold quickly seeped into my skin, chilling my blood.

Despite the heavy hand keeping me submerged, I fought back. But the sharp ice cut into me, stopping my struggles.

I had no choice but to hold my breath and wait. Either death would take me, or King Aboloft would order his men to pull me out.

Each second felt like an eternity. I had no idea how long Aboloft planned to keep me under. Had a minute passed yet? Would it pass before or after I succumbed to the darkness?

Sooner than I expected, my lungs started to ache. The pain began slowly, creeping through my lungs before settling and multiplying rapidly.

When my body screamed for oxygen, I started to thrash. But the man holding me down didn’t let up.

The jagged ice cut into my face, drawing blood that swirled and mixed with the water.

Pain blinded me as my need for oxygen grew. Now I understood why people said drowning was the most painful way to die.

I would’ve walked on broken glass a hundred times if it meant Aboloft would pull me out. My hands were held behind my back by another guard, otherwise I would’ve tried to free myself.

Why was he doing this? What was he punishing me for this time? How long would this go on?

If death came now, I would welcome it. If I had to die in the most painful way, so be it. Anything to end this torture.

Just as I started to feel lightheaded, and my body began to relax, my head was yanked up. I gasped, finally able to breathe.

I gulped down air, falling into the arms of my captor. Aboloft held me tight, watching as I breathed in deeply. If he wanted to starve me, he’d succeeded. I was starving for air.

“Tell me why you left me. Tell me now, and all this will stop,” Aboloft said, his hand cupping my cheek, wet with freezing water.

~Just tell him. You won’t hurt anymore. This is too much. Tell him, and he’ll stop. Trust him.~

“M-my fa—” My teeth chattered, making it hard to speak. My face ached from the icy water. The chill of the cell added to my already freezing body.

If I wasn’t so scared of fire, I would’ve run to the torches that lit my cell and provided a bit of warmth. Now, I was afraid I’d be scared of water too.

“Yes, my sweet, tell me,” Aboloft cooed, brushing wet strands of hair from my face.

I wanted to tell him. I couldn’t believe how quickly Aboloft had broken me; he’d won.

And I was too tired of the pain to fight anymore. I was weak, and what had just happened proved it.

“Ple-please stop,” I begged, welcoming the warmth as Aboloft pulled me close.

“Tell me what I want to know, and I won’t hurt you anymore,” Aboloft said.

When I opened my mouth to speak, I hesitated. Could I really do it? Could I really tell Aboloft what happened eight years ago? Would I really betray my best friend?

No, I couldn’t.

Aboloft didn’t need to know what happened. He didn’t need to know what my father told me, what the people of Wilsden told me. No one had to know, especially not the man I loved.

I would keep this secret to myself. I would never tell Aboloft what I had to endure before and after I left him. He was the king. He didn’t need to know about the life of his slave.

“Sabina, tell me,” Aboloft commanded when I’d caught my breath.

I shook my head, letting my silence answer for me. Aboloft gripped my jaw tightly, causing fresh pain. He was angry, but it was better than seeing him hurt.

I would never hurt Aboloft, even if it killed me.

“Did you see that? Did you see how easy it was for me to control your breath? Tell me what I want to know, or I’ll make you beg for the air you’re breathing so freely,” he warned.

“Please m-my lord,” I begged.

King Aboloft pushed me into the arms of his guards, who forced me back into position. Without giving me a chance to breathe, the man pushed my head back under the water.

The icy water welcomed me, immediately numbing every cell, every nerve.

The blood vessels in my face felt like they were about to burst. Pain tore through me as I held my breath, fighting the instinct to inhale, to survive.

But my fight didn’t last. My senses numbed, and I opened my mouth. The freezing water rushed in, filling every part of me. Where I needed oxygen, I got water. Where I wanted freedom, I got imprisonment.

Just like before, when I started to welcome the darkness, my head was yanked up and out of the water. I coughed and spluttered, trying to expel the water from my body.

My lungs burned, crying out in pain, oxygen their only relief. The men holding me let me fall, my body hitting the cold floor. But the water I’d been punished with was colder, so I didn’t feel the chill of the floor.

“Do you have an answer now?” King Aboloft asked, his voice eerily calm.

“Please, my lord, I beg you. Please have mercy.” I knelt, breathing heavily, trying to take in as much air as I could.

Aboloft was quickly making me realize how much I took for granted. I never thought there would come a time when I would yearn for simple things like walking, eating with my own hands, breathing.

What else did I take for granted—my eyes, my ears, my voice? Would Aboloft take away my ability to see and hear?

“Again.” His command left me breathless. No, no, no. Why couldn’t he just end it? Death would be a mercy compared to this torture.

In death, pain is a one-time deal. After that, nothing and no one can touch you. But in this torture, pain was a relentless visitor, each time more brutal than the last.

I was made to stand before the same guard dunked my head, subjecting me to the torment once more.

Maybe my tolerance for pain had dwindled, or maybe my body was ready to surrender, I couldn’t tell. But when I was forced underwater for the third time, pain detonated in my chest.

Water rushed in like venom, searing my lungs. The first two times, sheer willpower had kept me conscious, but now, my willpower was spent.

Pain gradually claimed my body.

Every cell in me screamed for oxygen.

My brain began to lose the battle.

Darkness crept in. I embraced it.

And I gave in.

~“Where have you been? Do you have any idea what time it is?” my father snapped as I walked in.~

~“I’m sorry, father. I fell and hurt my knee.” I showed him my blood-crusted knee.~

~His slap was so forceful it knocked the wind out of me, sending me sprawling. I clutched my throbbing cheek as my father glared down at me. The pain in my knee faded as a fresh sting flared on my cheek.~

~“Lies! You were out gallivanting with the prince, weren’t you? You worthless slut, how many times have I told you to stay away from him? He’s royalty and you’re nothing.~

~“I have some standing in this town, and you’re making me a laughingstock!” His words lashed me, leaving fresh wounds on my spirit.~

~“Father, Aboloft is my friend,” I protested.~

~I shrieked when he yanked me up by my hair.~

~“He’s a prince! How dare you sully his name with your filthy mouth?!”~

~My father dragged me by my hair to my room and shoved me, sending me sprawling on the floor. My knee screamed as it hit the rough floor.~

~“If you ever dare to speak his name again, I’ll cut out your tongue. Do you understand?!” he roared, his eyes spitting fire at me.~

~I shrank under his glare. “Yes, father, I’m sorry.”~

~My father stormed out of my room. “I need to marry this girl off before she causes me any more trouble.” He muttered to himself, but loud enough for me to hear.~

~Tears streamed down my face as I thought about Aboloft and my father’s words. My father was right. I didn’t even deserve to speak Aboloft’s name, let alone see him every day and call him my best friend.~

~I loved Aboloft, I truly did, but I could never tell him. It would not only cause trouble for my father, but the rejection from Aboloft would be unbearable.~

~I curled up on the floor, tears slipping from my eyes. I thought about Aboloft, how much I loved him, how he was the source of my joy and happiness.~

~Aboloft, I miss you so much. I wish you were here.~

~I love you so much, Aboloft.~

My eyes snapped open, and I sat up, gasping for air. My hand flew to my chest, trying to calm my racing heart. With wide eyes, I looked around, trying to figure out where I was, only to find myself in an unfamiliar room.

~Where am I?~

The room was opulent, to say the least. Silk curtains draped the walls, and thick carpet covered the floor, hiding every inch of brick.

The bed I was lying on was the largest I’d ever seen. It dwarfed the one in the infirmary.

Plush pillows sat atop the most comfortable mattress I’d ever experienced, while thin curtains provided a semblance of privacy, something I hadn’t had since I arrived here.

“You’re awake.” My heart lurched at the sound of the king’s voice. The curtains parted as Aboloft entered and sat on the bed. I watched him with terror while he studied me, a whirlwind of emotions flashing in his coal-black eyes.

“My lord.” I lowered my gaze, my eyes landing on the soft sheets.

“Lie down.” He gently pushed me back until my head rested on a pillow. “You’re running a fever.” It was more of an observation than a question.

Suddenly, images of what happened before darkness swallowed me flashed through my mind.

Tears welled in my eyes as I remembered my former best friend drowning me, subjecting me to the most excruciating torment, all because I wouldn’t give him the answers he so desperately sought.

But I couldn’t do that; I would never tell him what he wanted to know.

Aboloft caught a tear that slipped from my eye. He held it up to the candlelight, the flickering flame making my tear shimmer.

Seeing him hold my tear shattered something inside me, releasing the flood of tears I’d been holding back for so long.

They fell one after the other, but I didn’t care. Knowing that Aboloft felt no remorse for me anymore was a pain worse than any physical torment.

I should’ve been relieved that Aboloft was no longer my best friend. The fact that I wouldn’t cause him any more trouble should’ve made me happy, but it hurt worse than drowning.

“Why are you crying, Bluebell?” Aboloft asked, leaning in close, his face just inches from mine. He cupped my cheek, wiping away the tears with his thumb, but they kept falling.

I didn’t answer him. What could I say? That I was heartbroken he despised me? That it killed me to know he found it so easy to hurt me?

That I was crying because I missed him, my best friend, the man I loved, the one I would die for? That it hurt to know we could never go back to being best friends?

No, I couldn’t tell him that.

I was the one to blame. No one else. My stubbornness was my downfall. I refused to give Aboloft what he wanted. He promised he wouldn’t hurt me if I just explained why I left him. But I was too stubborn.

I chose to be his slave, to bear his punishments, when a few simple words could have saved me and brought my best friend back to me.

Maybe I was foolish, but I’d rather endure all the pain in the world than cause Aboloft any hurt. I could never do that to him.

“Why are you so stubborn, Bina?” Aboloft asked, wringing out a wet cloth before placing it on my forehead. He kissed my temple as the cool cloth rested there.

“I-I’m s-so-sorry,” I stammered through my sobs, gripping his hand that was resting on my cheek, momentarily forgetting my status as his slave. I was apologizing for everything and nothing at the same time.

He might not understand why I was apologizing, but I was sorry for everything, even for entering his life. If I hadn’t, none of this would have happened.

It was all my fault. I wished I could change it. I wished there was something I could do. But there wasn’t. I had ruined everything for both myself and Aboloft.

~I am so sorry, Aboloft.~