Chapter 14

SABINA

“My dad and the folks of Wilsden never liked us being together. Every time they saw us, they’d scowl and think the worst.

“They’d run to my dad with stories, even ones that weren’t true,” I began.

“Like what?” Aboloft asked gently, his thumb resting on my cheek.

“Terrible things. Things you can’t even imagine. Things we never did and never would,” I answered.

“Tell me, Bina,” he urged, his voice soft.

I swallowed hard and closed my eyes. “They told my dad I was hanging out with the prince—with you.

“They said you were wooing me. Just because we were seen laughing and smiling together, they labeled me a bad woman.”

Those memories were hard to shake, impossible even.

Every time I closed my eyes, I saw the judgmental stares of Wilsden’s people and my dad’s harsh reactions. Their cruel words echoed in my ears, each syllable a sharp stab.

“And then what? Did your dad believe them? What did he do? I mean, I know he wasn’t kind to you, but you never told me exactly what he did,” Aboloft asked.

He was right, I never told him about the hell I went through at home. He didn’t know he was my little piece of heaven, my joy. Aboloft knew none of it.

Whenever he saw a bruise or a cut on me, I’d lie and say I’d hurt myself. I knew if I told him my dad hit me, slapped me, he’d be upset. And I’d rather suffer than see him sad.

“Of course, my dad believed them. To him, his daughter was a liar, a witch.”

“What did he do, Bluebell?” he pressed.

I took a deep breath, preparing to reveal the torment I’d endured since meeting him.

“At first, it was small things, a harsh look, a snide comment. He’d tell me I was a disgrace, the worst daughter in all of Wilsden.

“He’d constantly say how he wished for a different daughter; someone who knew her place, who knew her worth. To him, I was worthless.

“I guess he was right in a way. A farmer’s daughter has no value. And a daughter like me was the worst of the worst.

“But then, when I didn’t stop seeing you, my dad got angrier. He went from words to fists. Every time I came home and he asked where I’d been, I’d lie and say I was somewhere else.

“But he’d just call me a liar and slap me. At first the slaps didn’t do much damage, but then my dad started hitting harder—hard enough to send me flying across the room.

“That’s how I got most of the bruises and scars.” Telling all this to an illusion felt freeing.

Now that Aboloft had pushed me to talk, it was like a dam had burst. I knew I wouldn’t stop until I’d told him everything.

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?” Aboloft asked, his brow furrowed, hurt shining in his eyes.

“How could I? You were my joy, and I would never tell you anything that could potentially ruin us. I was selfish about you, Aboloft.

“I wanted to see you, be with you, despite what the people of Quopia wanted. I didn’t care that my dad beat me every day when I got home, as long as I could spend time with you.

“You were my joy, my only reason for living in this awful world. So, I stayed quiet. I didn’t tell you anything. I lied to you and kept doing it until the last day of our friendship.”

“I was your friend, Sabina! You should’ve told me everything. I told you everything about my life. And you…you lied to me.

“I mean, I knew sometimes you were lying, but I never trusted my instincts, never listened to my gut. I believed you. I believed everything you told me.”

Aboloft looked like he wanted to smash something, regret etched on his face.

“Your happiness and peace mattered more to me than any obligation. And being with you made me forget my problems.

“For a few hours, they made me forget the pain I’d face when I got home. And I don’t regret my decision,” I said, smiling up at the man I loved but could never have.

Thank God he wasn’t real, otherwise it would’ve been hard for me to tell King Aboloft everything.

“You’re going to pay for this, Bina. You lied to me for so long. I won’t stand for this. You’ll be punished.” He gritted out, making me smile again.

“You can punish me all you want. You can hurt me, you can kill me. As long as it makes you happy, I’ll do it. I’ll endure the worst punishments, as long as it gives you peace.”

I raised my hand and cupped his cheek, the smoothness of his skin contrasting with the hardness of his jaw. It was strange how an illusion could feel so real.

“Oh no, my beautiful goddess, the punishments won’t be about pain. There’ll be pain, I won’t lie, but not much, and you will suffer.

“You’ll suffer for every single lie you told me,” he said, his words filled with sincerity.

“I don’t mean this in a bad way, but I suffered before when we were friends. I suffered for you then. I can suffer for you now.

“Your happiness meant everything to me then; it means everything to me now,” I told him, savoring the feel of his skin. His skin was soft, just like a king’s should be.

“And you’re going to tell me everything you went through?” That was my cue to talk about what happened. And I did.

“At first, the hurt was only at home. It was just my dad who would slap or hit me. But I was stubborn. I didn’t let the abuse keep me from seeing you.

“My dad, getting more and more frustrated, told the folks of Wilsden to treat me the same way he did. I overheard him talking to them, so I knew it was him. And things got worse.

“I couldn’t step outside without someone throwing a rock at me or shouting nasty things. Whatever they found on the ground, they’d try to hit me with it.”

Tears welled up in my eyes as I said this. The fact that my dad had told the people of Quopia to hit me hurt more than a thousand needles.

And it still hurt. No matter what I did, the pain never faded. It stayed fresh, just like the memories.

“And you just took it? Just like that? How could you be so foolish? If you’d told me what those people were doing to you, I would’ve stopped it. I would’ve put an end to all of it, even your dad!” Aboloft exploded.

“If I’d told you, it would’ve caused more problems, not just for me but for you too. You were a prince, Aboloft. You had a reputation to maintain in Quopia.

“If you’d tried to help a farmer’s daughter, it would’ve ruined you. It would’ve turned into a scandal you could never escape. I knew that, and I also knew I wasn’t worth it.

“I wasn’t worth ruining your reputation over. So, you have to understand, Aboloft, you have to understand why I did all this.”

If I had to go through all of that again, I would. Aboloft’s reputation meant much more to me than my own life.

“Stop it! Just stop it! I knew you were selfless, Bina, but this is ridiculous! How could you worry about my reputation when you were being treated like this?

“How do you think I would’ve felt if something happened to you? You cared about my reputation as the Prince of Quopia, but did you ever think about what it would do to me if something happened to you? Did you?!”

Now he was furious. I could see in his dark eyes that Aboloft wanted to destroy every single person in Wilsden, and I hadn’t even told him the worst part yet.

“I love you, Aboloft. And love makes us selfless. I would do anything for you. Absolutely anything. Just name it, and it’s yours,” I replied, not really thinking about my words anymore.

“Tell me more,” he said softly, not responding to what I’d just said.

“Remember that one day when I didn’t come to see you? The next day you were so mad, I had to spend twice as much time with you as usual,” I tried to remind him.

“Yes. I was furious. I missed you so much.”

I smiled at his words. Aboloft remembered, and for some strange reason, it made my heart flutter.

“That day was worse. I left my house to come see you when a group of men cornered me. They started hurling insults at me, and I tried to ignore them and get past them, but they had no intention of letting me go.

“And the next thing I knew, it was raining stones. They pelted me with stones of all sizes, whatever they could get their hands on. I begged them to stop. I pleaded for my life.”

“God, Bina.” Aboloft’s voice cracked, or maybe I just thought it did. I wasn’t sure.

“Yes. They stopped, eventually, when I no longer had the strength to get up. They left soon after, and I had to crawl all the way back to my cottage. I wanted to go and see you, but I couldn’t.”

A sob tore through me, followed by a flood of tears. “I had no energy. Pain was everywhere. And I was bleeding from a few places where the rocks had cut me.

“But you know, even then, even when I was crying out in pain, all I thought about was you. I knew that if I went to you, if I saw you, then I would feel better.

“That your kisses would make the pain go away. But my legs were useless at that time, so I couldn’t. I was forced to stay home and tend to my wounds alone.

“When my dad came home from work that evening, he was smiling for some strange reason. It was strange because he had stopped smiling around me. Instead, he always had a scowl on his face.”

“But that day he was smiling. He was happy.” More tears fell as I remembered that awful day and the reason for my dad’s unexpected happiness.

“I had just finished bandaging my last wound, satisfied that I would be better by the next morning. My dad asked me how my day was. Can you believe it? He asked me how my day was, for the first time in my life.

“Aboloft, I felt lighter after so long. I thought my dad cared about me. So I decided to tell him what happened, what those people did to me. And you know what he said in response? He told me I deserved it.

“He said the people had already told him what they did, and he believed that they should keep doing the same thing because it would stop me from seeing you.”

With a choked sob, I tried to roll onto my side with my back to Aboloft, but before I could move, he placed a hand on my shoulder, stopping me. Aboloft held me tighter, making me feel safe after so many years.

“I was overjoyed. The pain lessened considerably after that one question. Seeing my dad smile and him asking me about my day made me feel so much better. And I thought that maybe I could tell my dad everything.

“I wanted to tell him everything. How the people threw stones at me. The nasty names they called me.

“Thinking that my dad would help me, that he would tell the people to stop hurting me. I was his daughter. He was supposed to protect me.” Another sob shook me.

“You suffered so much. You went against everyone because you wanted to see me, to be my friend. You always wanted to meet at a place where there was no one because you didn’t want to tarnish my reputation.

“Bina, how could you keep this from me?” Aboloft’s voice was thick with emotion. He kissed the top of my head, his chin coming to rest there. “I would’ve helped you. I would’ve made sure you were happy.”

“But for how long, Aboloft?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. “How long could you have protected me? You were destined to be a king. You couldn’t have shielded me forever.

“I would’ve become a burden to you, just like I was to the people of Quopia. I couldn’t bear that.

“I can withstand anything, endure any hardship, but being a burden to someone, especially you, is something I can’t stand.”

“Bina, you’re wrong,” Aboloft said, his voice firm. “And I’ll make sure you understand that. Just wait.”

“But it’s the truth, Aboloft. We both know it. My father made sure I understood it. I was only fifteen when he told me how much of a burden I was to him and to our people.

“He said that being your friend would only cause problems. He said that you, as a prince, couldn’t afford to have problems, and I was a problem.

“He used my feelings for you against me, leaving me no choice but to accept it. So, I decided we couldn’t be friends anymore. It broke my heart to leave you, but I knew it was inevitable.

“You were a prince, and I was just a farmer’s daughter. We were from different worlds. It’s no wonder the people of Wilsden disapproved of our relationship.”

“Is that why you left me, Bina? Because your father said it would cause problems?” Aboloft asked, his voice filled with disbelief.

“Aboloft, you have to understand. I was selfish. Even though I knew it was wrong to be with you, I couldn’t stop myself.

“I didn’t care about the consequences for you, what being friends with a farmer’s daughter would mean for a prince. I knew it was wrong, but I couldn’t stop.

“Then my father said those things, and I had to face reality. That’s when I knew I couldn’t be your friend anymore,” I confessed.

“And then what happened, Bina? After you left me?” Aboloft asked, his voice strained.

“After I left you, my life turned into a living hell. I didn’t realize how close I was to death,” I said, my voice trembling as I remembered that terrible night.

“How, Bina? What happened?”

Taking a deep, shaky breath, I began to tell him about the night that had stolen everything from me, leaving me wishing for death.