Chapter 18

SABINA

I didn’t even know I’d fallen asleep until I woke up to the sun’s rays warming my face. But before I could even think about getting up, the memories of last night held me still.

The way Aboloft kissed my back, the way he held me as we both cried. It all flowed through my mind like a river.

But along with it came a wave of fear, washing over me, threatening to pull me under. It was morning now.

Last night, the only light was from the candles, and that’s how Aboloft saw my scarred back. But what about now? Now the sun was out. What would he say to me now?

The other side of the bed was empty. Aboloft was already gone. After he’d finished kissing my back, he untied me and pulled me into his arms, where we cried together.

I held him close, savoring the feel of him against me. Eight years. I didn’t realize how much I missed him until I touched him—his face, his arms, his chest. Aboloft was perfect.

Now, it was morning, and he was gone. How long ago did he wake up? And why didn’t he wake me?

I sighed as my hand brushed against bare skin. I was naked. I couldn’t just get out of bed like this. What if someone saw me?

My heart jumped when the door to my room opened and Aboloft walked in. I caught my breath as I took in the sight of the king standing before me, dressed in navy blue robes.

This king had kissed me last night; me, just a slave. He’d cried in my arms. He’d slept with me.

“Good morning, Bluebell,” Aboloft said.

It was only when I managed to tear my eyes away from his handsome face that I noticed what he was holding. Bluebells. A whole bunch of them, looking as fresh as if he’d just picked them from the garden.

The beauty of the bell-shaped flowers always took my breath away. To me, Aboloft was the most beautiful person in the world; but these bluebells were a close second.

Aboloft smiled as he walked over and laid down next to me on the bed. With a secretive smile, he gently touched the delicate flowers before plucking one from the bunch.

I gasped as I watched the poor little flower being torn away.

I’d survived cruelty, and I’d seen people being cruel to animals and humans, but there was something about seeing a flower being plucked that hurt me.

“Wh—” I couldn’t finish my question because Aboloft ran the now-separated bluebell over my cheek, caressing me with it. My eyes widened as I felt the soft petals against my skin.

Aboloft smiled before leaning in and giving me a gentle kiss, sending a thrill through my body.

“My queen. My Bina,” he said, dropping the flower and cupping my cheek. “I can’t believe you’re finally here, with me, in my home.”

What did he mean by that? I’d been in this castle for a long time. Why was he talking like he’d just found me and brought me here?

“I know it’s been three weeks since you arrived, but it feels like I’ve just gotten you back. You’ve been here for a while, but to me, last night was when we really connected, the way I wanted.

“I treated you like an animal before, not how I should have, and I will make up for all the pain and misery I’ve caused you, my sweet.”

“Aboloft, you don’t have to earn my forgiveness. You’re the king…”

“No! I’m not a king. I’m just Aboloft to you, Bina, like I was eight years ago. You will never call me King Aboloft or anything like that. You will only call me by my name. Aboloft. Do you understand?”

I knew if I disagreed, he would be angry. I knew that Aboloft expected only one answer: yes.

But could I do that? Could I turn back time eight years and be the Sabina who always smiled when he was around? Could we go back to the way we were?

“Yes. As you wish, Aboloft.” I nodded, unsure if it was the right thing to do or not.

“Good girl. Now, there are a lot of things I need to talk to you about, but first you need to get dressed. Your personal maids will be here soon, and they’ll take care of you.

“Wear the dress they give you and don’t question them. They have their orders from me, so I don’t want any defiance from you. I’ll come back when you’re dressed,” he told me.

He was about to get up and leave, but I stopped him by putting a hand on his arm. “Wh-what do you need to talk to me about?” I asked.

“Bina, I didn’t see you for eight years. And now that I have you back, I want to talk to you about everything that happened and everything that will happen.

“I’ve got my girl back now, and I’m going to be the only one who takes up her time and attention, her heart and mind, her bedroom and bed.”

With a quick kiss to my lips, he smiled and walked out of the room, closing the door softly behind him.

Without thinking, a smile spread across my face, and I felt things I hadn’t felt in eight years: happiness, peace, light, and most of all…hope.

It was all there. Aboloft had my heart then, and he had it now. He was my happiness then, and he was my happiness now. With just one kiss and a warm hug, he made me feel safe.

After a few minutes, the door opened again and seven women walked in. They were all wearing gray dresses that reached just below their knees.

They must be the maids Aboloft mentioned. One of them stopped in front of me and bowed slightly, making me feel uncomfortable. Why was she bowing to me?

“Lord Aboloft has ordered us to give you a bath. We’ve already prepared it for you. If you’ll come with me, please,” she said.

“Where is the bath?” I asked.

“Your bath is ready, just outside your room, your highness,” she replied.

“Don’t call me that,” I said.

“Please, follow me,” she offered, extending her hand.

“I need something to cover up with,” I told her.

“Of course.” She went to the cupboard, rummaged a bit, and came back with a shawl. I wrapped it around myself before getting out of bed.

“Lead me to the bath.” I wouldn’t have needed her help if I knew where it was.

She gave a soft smile, then turned and left the room. I followed, the shawl draped around my naked body.

Just as she’d said, the bath was right next to my room. Another maid opened the door for me.

The sight of the steamy water, flowing like a pond, took my breath away.

It was like stepping into a cave. The walls were solid stone. There was plenty of room to move around, and in one corner was a pond, surrounded by rocks.

Five maids walked over to the pond and stripped down to their white chemises. They took off their shoes, but left their hair tied up, standing still, waiting for something.

“After you, your highness,” one of the maids standing with me said.

“That’s the bath?” The water looked so inviting, I wanted to jump right in. But I held back, needing to be sure.

“Yes, your highness. I’ll take your shawl,” the same maid said.

I nodded and walked over to the edge of the pond. I took a deep breath, handed her the shawl, and slowly stepped into the water.

The water was unlike anything I’d ever felt. It was so warm and soothing, I let out a sigh of relief.

I’d never bathed in water like this. Was there something special about it? Was it from another kingdom?

As far as I could remember, I’d always bathed in cold water that left me shivering, especially in winter.

If I wanted hot water, I’d have to heat it myself. And it would cool down within minutes in the dropping temperatures and falling snow.

So this water was a luxury, a luxury I’d never experienced before.

Once I was in the water, three of the maids joined me, while the other four stayed outside, preparing things.

I would’ve felt strange being there alone, but having three other women there made it better. Still, I was uncomfortable with them seeing me naked.

“We’ll wash your hair, your highness,” one of the maids said, gently untying my hair. I’d never had someone else take care of me like this, and I didn’t want to.

I hoped this wasn’t a regular thing. I couldn’t stand having others tend to my needs. Ever since I was old enough to help my father with his crops, I’d taken care of myself.

I’d never had anyone to help me or do things for me. So having someone now felt strange. Very strange.

***

I stood in front of the mirror, looking at my reflection. She looked like me, but also like a stranger.

My hair was tied in an intricate knot. A green silk dress flowed down my body, adorned with countless jewels.

Emeralds hung from my ears and wrapped around my wrist, making me feel weighed down.

After the maids washed me, they wrapped me in a soft sheet and helped me back to my room. I thought it would be just as I’d left it, but it wasn’t.

There was a dress hanging in one corner, and the vanity table was covered in things I’d never seen before.

The maids sat me down and started working on my face and hair. They had me put on the dress the king had chosen for me, did my hair, and even did some things to my face.

It would’ve been uncomfortable if the girls hadn’t been talking and laughing. They included me, telling me about their lives in the castle.

When they were done, they said goodbye and left, leaving me alone with my reflection.

I couldn’t believe it was me in that expensive dress and jewelry. If I sold the emeralds I was wearing, I could feed so many poor people.

My eyes darted to the door when I heard it open. My heart leapt as Aboloft walked in, a soft smile on his face. Did he seem more peaceful than the last time I saw him?

“That’s how a queen dresses.” Aboloft hugged me from behind, kissed my ear, and rested his chin on my shoulder.

I looked at us in the mirror, standing together like lovers, not friends.

Seeing us together like this made my heart ache. It wanted something it had no right to. But I wanted it. I wanted Aboloft to be mine.

“I’m not a queen, Aboloft,” I said softly.

“You are. It’s just not official yet. But it will be soon, my beautiful goddess.” He nuzzled my neck, making me want to moan.

“I’m not—”

“Shh.” Aboloft put his fingers on my lips. “You are a goddess. Look at yourself.” He made me look at myself in the mirror again.

“See how beautiful you are. The men in Wilsden wanted you. They wanted to do unspeakable things to my queen. But they didn’t, and they never will.” His face hardened, then softened.

“A goddess doesn’t have scars,” I said.

“You’re wrong, my sweet. A goddess is called that because she has the strength to overcome anything. And that’s exactly what you did.

“Bina, you’ve been through hell and back, and yet you still manage to make me smile. You’re nothing short of a goddess to me, my beautiful goddess.” Aboloft gently cradled my chin, tilting my face up to meet his before pressing his lips to mine.

The kiss was unlike anything I’d ever felt before. As Aboloft’s lips parted mine, it was as if he was parting the veil to my soul, laying me bare before him.

The way he explored my lips felt like he was exploring my heart, touching every corner of it. And when he claimed my lips, it was as if he’d claimed my mind.

His lips were the only part of him touching me as his arms held me close, but it felt like he was touching me everywhere.

“Those men, they wanted to hurt you, wanted to do things to you that no one should ever have to endure. But only I will do that.

“Only I have the right to do sinful, unspeakable things to you. And I will.” His whispered promise sent a rush of heat to my cheeks.

Tears welled up in my eyes, a mix of overwhelming emotions and confusion. “You’re going to hurt me.”

“No, Bluebell. No more pain. And no more tears.”

I believed him. His words rang with nothing but sincerity.

“I don’t know how I’ll ever move past this. My father, the people of Wilsden…” My voice broke, the words trailing off into silence.

“You’re not alone anymore, my sweet. You have me, and I won’t rest until I’ve healed every single scar that mars your soul,” he pledged.

I turned to face him. “I wish I’d never left you, Aboloft.” A few tears slipped down my cheeks as Aboloft pulled me into his comforting embrace.

“I wish the same, Bluebell. I wish the same.”