44. Laylaâs loneliness
Before I hated my Grandpa, I was so clingy to him. I loved my Grandpa who uses some strange techniques who liked to spoiled me earnestly.
Grandpa showed me the strange technique⦠Sealing Techniques, as if it were magic tricks.
When I was a kid, I was simple, so when I saw his technique of putting out rings and jewels from a piece of paper, I fell in love with him.
Seeing such a mysterious technique, I decided to become a Magician.
I strongly admired the Sealing Technique used by Grandpa. I tried to learn it, but I gave up knowing that I didnât have the Mana for it.
Of course, I didnât give up easily, I imitated my grandpa all day⦠but, I knew I couldnât really do it, and the next day I was crying all day.
Every year, in the Tenzaka Month, I came to with Grandpa and spend our time together there for a week. [TN: itâs the fifth month]
Grandpa, who seemed to be busy all year round, stayed with me for a least seven days every year. He bought me anything I asked. Clothes, stuffed animals, anything⦠I didnât know since when, but one day I felt like I only used my grandpa for money, and I instinctively hated it even when I was a kid. So, when I was about⦠seven years old, I didnât ask him for anything on our trip.
â¦And on the last day of our trip on that year, Grandpa bought a stuffed animal without me asking for it.
It was an ugly⦠weird-looking teddy bear.
To be honest, it wasnât to my liking at all, but since Grandpa left home for hours only to bought me one stuffed animal. When I thought he was probably very worried and decided to give something to me, I received it and laughed at that ugly teddy bear. Then Grandpa smiled as if he was relieved.
Grandpa said he was worried because he didnât know what to do since I didnât ask anythingâ¦
Even so, I couldnât believe that he chose that ugly stuffed animalâ¦
Yeah, he was basically a clumsy person. He rarely talked, and always looked lonely⦠somehow empty. He had a sad face.
â¦But only when I was on his lap he was laughing as if something was filled.
Grandpa always cared for me and often asked, âAre there any abnormalities in your body?â, âAre there any pains?â, he persistently asked me. So I told him that he worried too much. Still, every time I met him, I heard the same thingâ¦Â He was really a worrywart.
It might be weird to say this myself⦠But, Grandpa was fond of me. I felt tremendous love from him⦠me too, I was returning the same affection to my grandpa.
Grandpa who was kind⦠and I loved so much.
ââThat person⦠betrayed me.
Committing the worst sin⦠a human experimentationâ¦
ââââââââââââââââ
After I left Seal, I went back home and went into my room, the frustration I feel since a while ago didnât go away.
â⦠Seal Zettaâ
Suddenly, I see an ugly stuffed animal on the bed.
I trample it, and his face come to my mind.
âSeal⦠ZETTAâ¦! â
What is this feeling?
I just, canât forgive his existence.
I canât forgive that face of him, He who learned Sealing Technique, and looked like as if he knew everything about Grandpa.
ââãâI need to tell you this⦠Your Grandfather is deadâ¦.âã
âIt doesnât matterâ¦â¦â
I hate Grandpa.
I lost everything because of that personâ¦!
âI donât care⦠I donât care!â
I kick the stuffed animal many times.
Again⦠and againâ¦â¦
âIâm not sad⦠Iâve a grudge against Grandpa, I despite him, I really hate himâââ
ââIâm not sad.
I take my feet off the stuffed animal.
The stuffed animal still looks the same even after I kicked it so many times⦠it seems, I was unconsciously held my strength.
âSealing Technique⦠Why you could? Why you, know that Grandpa diedâ¦â
The technique that I longed for, that I wanted to have no matter what I lost⦠He has it all.
Well, of course⦠he doesnât know how much I wanted it.
You, who is a complete strangerâ¦
I definitely donât want to lose.
I want to deny this.
Grandpaâs disciple, his existence, I canât forgive ââ no matter what
At first glance, his ability is not that high.
There was almost no magical pressure, I couldnât feel the atmosphere peculiar to the strong man.
The girl next to him seemed stronger than him.
ââ¦..â
My right arm that I used to block that girlâs kick is still a little numb.
Well, Iâve been away from magic for a long time, so my senses are dull. But itâs okay, I can regain my senses in five days.
That guy⦠Seal, is probably about the same level as a âThree Starâ in the Magic Academy. And I, a âOne Starâ level. Heâs not my opponent. Iâve never lost in a mock battle. Iâve won against both senior students and teachers.
Iâm confident that I will never lose as long as Iâm conscious.
The last existence left by Grandpa, the only disciple of Grandpa. The existence that taught by Grandpa about that technique-ââ All of it, everythingâ¦Â Iâll deny it and break it.
All my hatred for My Grandpa, Iâll vent it all to you.
âIâll bully you to the fullest⦠Seal-kun.â
The light slowly disappears from my eyes.
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