"Would you care to stop and look at the snow outside?" Agrippina Goldshaw, the second daughter of the Goldshaws had enough nerve to sit on his brother's desk and snatch his fountain pen away and make a face. "We're expecting Michael in the evening. He'd be back."
"I just shoveled snow away," Harvey scowled with bitterness, "when you were sound asleep with drool on your chin."
"I do not sleep like that," Agrippina leaned down, whispering fiercely. "You do!"
"Actually I should have shovelled you away-" Harvey was cut short when his sister grabbed his hair and pulled his head, "you gremlin- let go of my hair!"
Harvey stood up, both his hands going straight to his sister's beautiful braided hair and pulling all the tucked strands violently. Agrippina screamed in pain, reflexively pushing Harvey down to throw in a few punches on his face.
And his brother didn't mind doing the same too, until their eldest sister came running upstairs from all the ruckus.
"Lords, Harvey- what on earth is happening in here?" Drusilla slapped a palm over her mouth, suppressing a yell as she ran to separate the two.
"Stay out of this sister, lest you wish to be hurt." Agrippina suddenly had the determination of a war soldier, while she pulled on Harvey's short hair and banged it against the wooden floorboards.
"Yes, stay out-!" Harvey winced when he did the same, but somehow, the eldest child of the Goldshaws managed to pry them apart.
"You," she said to her sister, "what sort of behaviour is this?"
"He started it!" Agrippina pointed an exasperated finger to her older brother.
"To be honest, seeing you makes me believe in Darwin." Harvey scoffed loudly.
"Harvey! Act your age!" Drusilla glared.
"Alright," Harvey stood up, stomping his feet loudly as he walked out from his room, deciding to go downstairs for some fresh air. Christmas was a day away, and winter had seen Harvey turn nineteen.
One month, exact one month passed that he had come home for the holidays, and each day, he thought about Ansel.
Harvey watched dryly as the sun set far away in the horizon, and the sky started turning lavender. How easy was it to lose track of time in Ansel's memories, and just be content with them.
Because everything about Ansel, even the way of his rejection was so calm, he could never incite any form of anger in Harvey.
"Sister said there was a letter for you," the youngest sister came running up to Harvey, when he was sitting on the porch, watching the snow fall softly.
"Me?" Harvey had received a few from Fane and Jubilant, but nothing else.
"Yes."
"But it's addressed to Drusilla," Harvey squinted before opening.
"Nuh-uhâ¦" Livilla tutted, "she said it's for you."
"Fine. I'll read it."
But his eyes widened as soon as he opened that parchment. This beautiful handwritingâ¦
Dear Drusilla,
I am not Michael. And I have been writing to you since last summer. To be completely honest, I wrote this letters in exchange of money from Michael. And I was the one who caused the horrendous misunderstanding between you and Agathe.
Please forgive me.
And I need to say some things.
One fine morning, my peace in the library was broken quite brutally by a young man, who in every intention, wanted to beat me up. But upon talking for just half an hour, he looked like a very harmless, yet an extremely irrational man.
My first impressions were that he needed to release his anger somewhere and perhaps⦠perhaps my companionship would soothe him.
I grew very fond of him, because his thoughts, his determination for life, and the love and respect he held for his loved ones were honourable. And then, I do not know when it happened, but I began to think a lot about him.
I cannot fix on the hour, or the spot, or the look or the words, which laid the foundation. It is too long ago. I was in the middle before I knew I had begun.
It was my own hesitation that pushed him away, the fear of having my heart broken again, but somewhere in this journey... it's his face that clouds my mind when I write letters these days.
I don't know the reason, but it would be hypocritical of me to ignore these feelings- for I am the one who tells people to accept them.
My name is Ansel Dawson, and I lied to you.
But someone told me, "in these situations, an apology hurts even more."
Therefore, I'll confess.
With love,
Ansel.
Harvey's hands were shaking when he finished reading the letter, and big fat drops of tears rolled down his cheeks, soiling the beautiful penmanship inked on that paper.
"And sister also told me to tell you that there's someone to see you." Livilla sighed, swinging her legs on the porch.
It didn't take Harvey a moment to dash out in the front room of his house, and beside the very clingy Michael and Drusilla, was a very familiar, dewy young man⦠sipping tea and looking extremely out of place.
"Youâ¦" Harvey turned breathless all of a sudden when their eyes met. "Youâ¦"
Ansel didn't know what face to make, and thus he smiled, his out-of-place, hesitant smile.
"He told me that he wanted to see you." Michael smiled, "And I asked him to come with me."
"For the first time Michael, you did something good." Harvey muttered, as he ran straight to Ansel, grabbed his hand and led him upstairs to his room, not caring to look behind.
"Slow down please," Ansel laughed, unsure of how to react⦠he had never been in somebody else's house before.
"You said you'll confess." Harvey glared, "you better not take it all away after making me like this."
"No," Ansel smiled brightly, brighter than the sun. "It's real."
"I read that," Harvey nodded, nearing Ansel, and this time, Ansel didn't refuse. "I read all that⦠what, I am irrational?"
"Of all the words, you had to choose that." Ansel chuckled, taking Harvey's face in his hands, "But I missed you too."
"Really?" Finally, for the first time in so long, Harvey smiled. A smile that mirrored Ansel's. "I can't believe you are real."
"Then what, should I write to you too?" Ansel shook his head.
"Twelve pence," Harvey teased, "I have the money."
"You are an idiot." Ansel laughed.
"But you love me anyway."
His letters were always expectations packed in a piece of paper, and he, Ansel, never let them down.
THE END
Stay tuned for the epilogue and some fun facts.