Lunchtime Lingering

Yuu had survived a lot since arriving at Night Raven College.

Ghosts. Magical overachievers. Dorm rivalry chaos. Nearly getting crushed by flying furniture during an alchemy explosion. She’d even survived Kalim’s surprise parties, which, in her opinion, were scarier than any monster the Mirror could conjure.

But nothing—nothing—could prepare her for the way Rook Hunt kept smiling at her now.

Ever since The Shower Incident, which she had mentally locked in a vault labeled NEVER SPEAK OF AGAIN, the Pomefiore vice-warden had undergone a transformation. Before, he had been vaguely present. She’d seen him in hallways, class, potions tutoring. He was actually quite helpful if you needed to know—well, almost anything. Of course, his answers usually came with extra information, riddles, poetry, and him watching people around him like a very fashionable owl.

Now?

Now, he was worse.

“Ah, mademoiselle Yuu,” Rook sang, sliding into the seat beside her in the cafeteria like he belonged there (he didn’t), “how radiant you are in the light of the soup bar. Has anyone ever told you your gaze glimmers like moonlight on wet tile?”

She choked on her orange juice. He handed her a lacey handkerchief produced from somewhere in his very-layered uniform, producing with the speed of a man who had prepared for exactly this occasion.

“I don’t recall you ever calling me by name,” she said carefully, when she could breathe again. “Is something different today, Vice-Housewarden?”

“Ah, but mademoiselle,” he said, with a tragic expression, “how could I continue addressing you in vague camaraderie, when I have glimpsed such truth? Such consuming beauty! Such—”

Behind him, Vil and Epel were approaching the table, trays in hand, and in a fit of desperation, she snatched a roll off her tray—the one half the size of his head—and shoved it as far as she could get it into his mouth.

“Afternoon, Prefect,” Vil greeted smoothly, polished smile ever in place. “Are these seats for us?”

No, she wanted to cry. Please take your very pretty madman with you and go.

“But of course!” Rook cried, beaming. “Do sit down!”

Her head flipped back to him fast enough to give her whiplash. He’d eaten the roll. All of it. Disposed of the entire, enormous lump of bread like a sword-swallowing act. He used his absolutely free mouth to carry on speaking.

“I have just been enjoying the radiant beauty with which our dear prefect has graced the lunchroom with this fine day! Have you ever seen such loveliness? Such hunger-induced pallor? I would gladly be struck down again and again if it meant one more glimpse!"

This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.

Hunger-induced pallor?

"Ah, filou! You sit there, flushed and fuming, yet in my eyes, you are as breathtaking as a rose blooming in the snow—impossible, defiant, unforgettable! I feel that since yesterday—”

Yuu lunged for the bread on Vil’s tray and shoved that one in Rook’s mouth, too, before things could get worse. This time, she was able to watch with morbid fascination, as he tucked the entire thing into his head with elegant fingers, and swallowed, smiling.

Vil blinked, clearly unsettled, glancing between the two of them.

Rook daintily patted the corners of his mouth with a napkin—where had that come from?—and gave a dreamy sigh. "I once thought beauty lived only in the nature of emotion, and in those who embodied it, but non! It lives in your attempt to suffocate me with pastry!"

“Care for another?” Yuu threatened blandly.

“What… am I witnessing?” Vil asked, eyes narrowing as he lowered himself gracefully into the seat across from her.

Epel flopped into the one beside him, already grinning like a gremlin at a school play gone terribly off-script. Yuu made eye contact with him across the table, hoping that her expression communicated the same thing that his usually did when flanked by the Pomfiore leaders:

Help!

He did not.

“Non, I must speak! Your fury is as intoxicating as your modesty—like Venus armed with a slipper. You are witnessing the birth of new understanding, Roi du Poison,” he said, turning to Yuu with the soft-eyed adoration of a man who had just been publicly bread-assaulted and liked it.

“New understanding,” Vil echoed, flatly.

Rook nodded solemnly. “A revelation! Like sunlight through the glass of my soul.”

“Rook, what exactly are you trying to say?” Vil snapped impatiently.

Across the table, Epel slowly bit into his sandwich.

“He’s been like this all morning,” he muttered to her.

“Right,” Yuu smiled brightly, sensing danger. “You guys enjoy your lunch! I’m finished here, so—”

Vil reached out and pulled her back into her seat.

“You’ve hardly touched your food, Prefect. Finish eating. We won’t disturb you.” He leveled a hard look at Rook when he said this, as though he was aware that ‘we’ in this situation, entirely depended on his vice-housewarden. “And we will be perfectly polite.”

Rook placed a hand dramatically over his chest. “But of course. A hunter must address his muse properly. Would you have me be rude?”

“I’d have you pretend that nothing happened, and go your merry way,” Yuu said with a small smile. “And, thank you, Vil, but I really am full. Tell him, Epel.”

Yuu locked eyes with Epel—or she tried to. The boy was pointedly looking at anything but her, and even more studiously avoiding the look that Rook was giving him. Even Yuu could see, however, the cheery promise of unpleasantness in Rook’s perfectly pleasant grin.

“Pretend that nothing happened?” Vil parroted blandly.

Yuu bit her tongue. She couldn’t even blame Rook for that slip-up. Time to run!

“I…have to pick up Grim from the magift fields,” she lied quickly, collecting her tray.

Once more, Vil tried to stop her. Him, by adding placations. Then there was Rook, who tried to persuade her by coaxing. And then offering to carry the tray for her. And then carrying it right behind her when she jumped up to leave.

“I can walk you out, mon ange!” Rook offered cheerfully.

“Don’t you dare.” This time, it was Rook who Vil snagged and dragged back into his seat.

The last thing that Yuu heard him say was, “Rook, I’d very much like to hear the reason for…this.”