Have you ever really wanted to tell someone something, but they wouldn't shut up long enough for you to tell them? And then you try to tell them, but they keep blocking you off and starting a new story, and then they get mad when you interrupt them but you seriously just need to tell them what happened?
That was me with Kelsey.
"--and after the play was over, Jason was so sweet about it, he didn't even get mad about the whole kiss scene thing."
"Uh huh." Come on, come on, shut up already so I can talk to you, dammit!
"I mean, I totally expected him to be mad, seeing as how I kissed, like, the hottest guy other than Jason to ever have existed, but Jason insisted that since it was just a stupid scene it didn't bother him much."
"Yeah." How the hell are you still talking? It's been like ten minutes.
"Have you ever met anyone as sweet and loving as Jason is? I mean oh my god he's just so sweet!"
It would be great if you could stop now.
"Anyway, then we went and got some ice cream at Tudy's, and--"
"Kelsey."
"--then he got butter pecan and I got strawberry cheesecake but instead of us just eating them--"
"Kelsey."
"--he let me eat like half of his and then we traded and it was so romantic, and--"
Oh, for fuck's sake! "Kelsey!"
Her blue eyes focused on me, but they were irritated. "What is it? Can't you just wait until I finish the story?"
I groaned inwardly, closing my eyes briefly and considering my options. "Yes, I can wait."
"Good," she said, contented with my response as she began her story again. "Anyway, we started sharing, and then he started talking about some of the stuff he's been doing in the past few months, and..."
She went on talking for what was probably nine years.
Finally, I couldn't take her talking anymore. I mean I loved her, but how long could one human being go without inhaling? "I'm pregnant."
Kelsey started choking on her soda.
My eyes widened as she choked and I slapped her on the back a few times.
"You--" she managed through coughs, "--what?"
I lifted an eyebrow. "I needed to get your attention," I said simply.
"I hate you," she said, still coughing.
"I was going to tell you that Corey introduced me to his family for the first time as his girlfriend," I said, sighing.
"Seriously?" she squeaked, sitting up straight. "When? How did they react?"
About two days after school had gotten out, he had asked me to become his official girlfriend. Then, two weeks later, he had told his parents and had me over for dinner with them again. I had been nervous about it, but he kept insisting that his family loved me and that there was nothing that I should be afraid of. He had been right. "A couple of days ago. You were off on your trip with Jason in North Dakota so I couldn't tell you in person."
She squealed, wiggling in her seat excitedly. "Oh my god, Ryder! That's amazing!"
I smiled. There was the reaction I wanted.
"How did they react?"
"Well, I'm not sure Emily even understands what a girlfriend is. She asked me to be her girlfriend too and when I asked what she meant she said that she wanted me to hang out with her all the time like I do with Corey. The twins started jumping and screaming something about a canon and a boat, and his parents seemed pretty alright with it. They already thought we were dating the first time I met them, so I guess it wasn't much of a surprise."
"So have you and Corey...you know...done the sideways tango?"
I stared blankly.
"The saddle-less pony ride."
"What?"
She rolled her eyes then grabbed both of my hands. "You guys have been dating for like two weeks, right?"
"Um...yes?"
"Have you slept with him yet?"
I felt blood fill my cheeks. "Kelsey! No, I haven't."
"Oh, that sucks. I mean, that's what Jason and I did for my eighteenth birthday."
"Right, since that made you legal. You already told me that."
Kelsey rolled her eyes. "My point is, you're almost legal. Have you even considered it?"
"No."
"Why?"
I shook my head. This conversation was going to go in circles, I could already tell. "Because of all of the diseases I could catch, Kelsey. I'm not going to risk my health over something that will last maybe an hour and potentially have the ability to completely destroy me emotionally. Plus, there's the risk of pregnancy--"
"Jason and I use condoms. Just do that."
"Condoms don't protect you from AIDS, Kelsey," I sighed tiredly.
She grimaced at the name of the disease. "Could you not say that? That's gross."
"That's reality," I corrected.
Kelsey sighed. "Whatever. Do what you will, my innocent virgin friend."
I snorted. Before she turned eighteen, she had been the most innocent person I had met in my entire life. Now she was calling me out?
"Anyway, what's he going to do for your birthday?"
"It's June. My birthday is in September."
"That's only three months away."
"Which is a shit load of time."
She groaned. "Don't make this like it was last year, please."
Corey was suddenly behind me. I knew it was him, because his arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me backwards against him. "What are we talking about?" he asked, his low voice rumbling just beside my ear and giving me slight chills.
"What you're going to do for Ryder's eighteenth birthday."
"That's soon, isn't it?"
I wasn't offended he didn't know my birthday; it was one of the few things that I had refused to tell him, simply because I hated it that much.
"It's three months away," I sighed.
"Not too long then," he decided thoughtfully.
"You have to do something, like, really special. Because she hasn't let me celebrate her birthday with her one time, and last year when I tried, she legitimately left her own party and didn't let me take her to the water park like I wanted to."
"I hate water parks," I growled.
"No, you love them."
Damn it, this is why I didn't like it when people knew things about me. They could always call me out on stuff. Stupid friends.
"We could go to a water park," Corey offered.
"If you throw me a party in any way, I will cut off your hands and leave them in the wave pool, do you understand me?"
"Was it a pun to leave hands in the wave pool?"
"Yes," I said, not able to help the grin. "Thank you for noticing it."
Kelsey squealed. "You two are so cute together! I hope you two stay a couple for like, forever."
Corey and I didn't say anything. We had both discussed this topic before; high school relationships weren't forever. It was a very, very rare thing, and most of the people that thought they could last forever broke up when college happened. College was distracting, and stressful, and a time for change and experimentation for most people. That meant there was an opportunity for people to grow apart. I wasn't going to be part of the teenage population that thought they were 'different' or thought that it couldn't happen to them simply because they were them.
Anything can happen to anyone.
Anything can change.
* * * * *
"And this doll is named Ellie," Emily said, pointing. "I named her like my name."
"That's clever," I said, smiling.
"Mmhmmm. I'm a clover kid."
I laughed silently to myself. She had meant clever, probably. Kids were so cute at this age.
"Alright, Emily, time to go to bed," Corey repeated for the third time as he leaned against the doorway. "I realize that you are trying to steal my girlfriend from me and all, but I really do have dibs on her, so if you could stop, that would be great."
I snorted.
Emily pouted. "Corey! Come on! Just ten more minutes?"
"You said that fifteen minutes ago. And twenty minutes before that. I told you she's mine."
"But..."
"No, Emily. Go to bed already."
She stood up, grumbling about boys being stupid, and crawled in to her bed.
I smiled and stood up as well. "Night Emily," I said softly as I turned off the lights.
"Night Ryder," she said through a yawn.
When I closed the door behind me, Corey had his hands on my waist and pressed me against the wall next to her room gently so that he could kiss me. Finally he pulled away from me and smiled a little bit. "You are really great with kids, Ryder. Even if you say you don't like them, you are actually pretty gifted with handling them. You're the only one Emily will really listen to anymore."
I smiled and pushed him lightly away from me. "We can't just kiss in front of your little sister's room, it's creepy."
He tilted his head. "Would you like to go to my room then?"
"Sure," I said with a shrug. It wasn't like I hadn't been in his room before when I was helping him babysit. We walked to his room and looked around. It was a little neater than it had been the last time I was in there, with his books more carefully arranged and his posters straightened. I sat down on his computer chair and crossed my legs crisscross style.
"Kelsey said she wanted us together forever," Corey commented, sitting on the corner of his bed.
"She's Kelsey." Really, that should be explanation enough, if you thought about it.
"Yeah, but it made me think, Ryder."
"About?"
"Us."
"This sounds like a cheesy break up conversation."
"Trust me, that's not the direction this is going."
I tilted my head, listening.
"I was just thinking. Would I even want to be with you forever? I mean, yeah, you're really truly amazing, but I've only known you for a few months, and we've been dating for a little over two weeks. That's not really much time. Plus, we don't even know half of what we should know about each other."
Okay. And? I knew this already.
"But the more I thought, the more I considered what it would be like to live without you. And that's just...I don't want that."
"I don't want that either," I said easily. "What made you think about all of this? Is this going somewhere?"
"I just..." he ran a hand through his hair. "We...I don't know, Ryder. I have no idea what I'm trying to say. I think I'm just kind of talking for the sake of talking right now. It's just been something that's been on my mind, that's all."
Moving to sit next to him, I gave myself a few moments to think. "Well," I said thoughtfully, "do you think we'll be together next week?"
"Yes."
"Next month?"
"Yes."
"Next year?"
"Yes."
I smiled. "Then that's all we need to focus on, really. We'll just play it by day; there's no reason to think about the future right now if that means that we can't enjoy living."
He touched his forehead to mine. "You make things sound so simple."
"That's because things are simple. We just over complicate things. If more people slowed down for a moment and thought about the generalization of what was going on, I think they would be a lot less stressed out in their lives."
Corey nodded thoughtfully.
I kissed him on the cheek. "Alright. I'm gonna go home now. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"
"Alright. Night."
"Night."