I left the twins and headed straight to Grandmaâs room.
I felt I should bid her farewell as well.
I wasnât sure when Iâd see her again. Asenaâs fury, her declaration never to see me again, could last a lifetime. If thatâs the case... this might be my last time seeing grandma.
-Knock, knock.
I was short on time. Before waiting for her permission after knocking, I slowly opened the door.
Grandma was sitting, looking out the window. She slowly looked up at me, and her eyes widened in surprise upon seeing my expression.
It seemed she noticed the newfound determination on my face.
She probably anticipated my decision too.
She grimaced, then stood up from her spot.
Without a word, I opened my arms and approached her.
Grandma came to me, and we gently embraced each other.
â...Cayden... Do you really have to do this?â
â........â
âWill I have to experience the pain of losing a child again?â
âIâm sorry.â
â...Didnât I tell you that you donât have to sacrifice?â
My heart tightened at her words, and simultaneously, I felt stifled.
â...Grandma, I donât know any other way. I canât say itâs the best way, but isnât it the only way?â
â........â
â...Asena is very angry.â
â.........â
âShe said sheâll never see me again... Haha. So, perhaps... this might be our last meeting too.â
â...What?â
âI told you if I disappeared from the twinsâ hearts, Iâd come back... but that might be too much to hope for now.â
âCa... Cayden...!â
âThank you for everything. For truly raising me... as if I were your own grandson.â
Grandma pulled away from our embrace and looked up at me. Her eyes were filled with an indescribable confusion.
The possibility of meeting again in the distant future and a complete farewell are different.
Thatâs why the death of a loved one is so sorrowful.
I said,
â...I donât know what the future holds. Grandma, Iâm going to the Hexter family now. I might become a commoner... but it was thanks to your promise with Count Hexter that they agreed to take me in, right? Even if I become a commoner... you said youâd support Hexters.â
â.........â
âBut if thereâs a possibility of increased conflict with Asena, you can withdraw your support. While it might not be my place to decide, Iâll try to hold my own within the Hexter family. Iâve heard that the residents of the Hexter territory already like me because I provided them with food. Additionally, Iâll keep honing my skills as a knight... I hope they accept me. But weâll see.â
â...It canât be..â
âYou have to stay healthy, Grandma.â
I took her right hand in both of mine and gently kissed the back of it.
Then, I turned away without a word.
It was only after I had turned my back that Grandma reached out to stop me.
âCayden!â
Asena had done the same earlier. She had stopped me as I was leaving. I suddenly realized how alike the two of them were and couldnât help but chuckle.
â...Cayden... do you really... have to do it this way?â
â.......â
â...If youâre going to sacrifice yourself like this...â
â.......â
â...Fine, any choice you make is okay. I was wrong. Cayden... any choice you make is okay. I canât bear to see... all my grandchildren suffering...â
I frowned slightly.
â...What do you mean?â
â.......â
She didnât respond.
Was she referring to what I had been thinking?
I shook my head.
â...No. That... that canât happen... theyâre my siblings.â
And then, I turned away.
****
Upon arriving at the stable, the stableman greeted me with a smile upon seeing my face.
âLord Cayden. What brings you here?â
It seemed he was unaware of the recent commotion inside.
âWhereâs Storm?â
âHeâs inside. Are you going for a stroll, perhaps?â
I nodded with a smile.
â...Yes. If youâd call it a stroll.â
I entered the stable searching for Storm. It wasnât too hard. All I had to do was look for the large black horse.
I approached him and stroked his head.
â...Storm. Youâve been well.â
Storm neighed in his peculiar way in response.
âYou never change.â
There was a comfort in that fact, the consistency.
I took hold of his reins and opened the wooden gate.
Just then, I heard the approaching sounds of many men clad in heavy armor. Recognizing the familiar clang, I quickly identified it.
Looking outside the stable, there stood Sir Lawrence, my mentor and the knight I aspired to emulate.
â...Lord Cayden.â
Confusion filled his voice. Beside him stood the soldiers of Pryster, all aligned.
Although called Prysterâs soldiers, they were young men whom I could also call my friends.
Having crossed swords with them during training, I could see the shock evident on their faces.
â...What have you done?â
Lawrence inquired.
â......â
âWhy have there been orders... to imprison Lord Cayden?â
So, orders for my imprisonment have been issued. Twins intend to punish me� Our relationship is truly on the brink. They must have really steeled themselves, deciding to despise me.
âLawrence. Make way. Everyone... make way.â
I didnât offer an explanation.
âLord Cayden, I was aware of the strained relations between you, the Duchess, and Lady Keirsey. There must be some misunderstanding. Perhaps you should return and discuss-â
â-Lawrence. There are reasons hard to explain. I canât go back, and I shouldnât. So, make way.â
â.........â
âYou know me, Lawrence. Thereâs a reason.â
Lawrence clenched his teeth. The soldiers beside him were waiting for his decision. Yet, it seemed they wanted to grant my request, their grips on their swords relaxing.
Lawrence continued.
â...I heard youâve been exiled from the Pryster family.â
â...Yes.â
â...Then, you cannot take the horse.â
At his words, I looked back at Storm. Yes, if it had come to thisâ¦
I held Stormâs head and pressed my forehead against his snout.
â...So, itâs goodbye for us too.â
Perhaps leaving everything clean-cut would be best - Leaving every trace of being a Pryster behind.
I let go of Stormâs reins and looked at Lawrence.
â...Can you let me go now?â
Lawrence pondered for a while longer. The agony was evident on his face.
A knight must remain loyal to his lord.
Itâs a saying Lawrence has heard countless times.
Yet, he was conflicted, looking at me, the one he had trained since childhood.
The saying âthe shrimp gets caught in the whaleâs fightâ seemed fitting. I only felt sorry for getting him involved in our quarrel.
If I had known it would come to this... I wouldâve left without letting Lawrence see me. But I couldnât have left without saying goodbye to Grandma either.
A young man whispered to Lawrence.
â...Sir Lawrence...â
His voice sounded as if he was pleading on my behalf.
Lawrence closed his eyes tight.
â...We saw nothing.â
He told his soldiers.
In unison, they nodded.
At the same moment, he made way.
I stood in the gap, looking at Lawrence.
Simultaneously, we embraced each other. It was a strong, solid hug.
â...Lawrence. Thank you.â
âLord Cayden... You must return someday.â
â...Haha, if itâs possible.â
And with that, carrying only my sword, I left the Pryster castle.
But before even reaching far, I stopped, tore off the snake emblem of the Pryster family clinging to my shoulder, and left without looking behind.
****
Asena was trapped in a mental prison. No matter how hard she tried to shake off her thoughts, her eyes couldnât see ahead - Her vision was constantly pulled back to that memory.
Cayden, who left without a word at the end.
She couldnât come to terms with that fact.
It felt as though she was bearing the weight of all the sorrow in the world. She writhed in bed, screamed, and even ordered Lawrence to be locked in solitary confinement for two days for failing to bring Cayden back. She broke and destroyed things, but nothing changed.
In her rampage, destroying everything in the room, the emotion that newly arose was... rage. A deep, burning rage.
She had warned him. Told him heâd regret his choice, that sheâd come to despise him, that sheâd never love him again.
And yet, he left, disregarding even that. She resented him. She was furious.
A feeling of wanting him to suffer kept growing within her.
Truly, sincerely, she wanted him to feel pain.
...And in that pain, she hoped heâd return to her. She wished he would realize that being away from her was unbearable.
She wanted him to regret, to miss her.
Thus, Asena roughly wiped away her tears. She sat down at her desk, opened the inkwell, and sharply dipped her quill into it.
She began writing letters fervently. These were letters to be sent to numerous noble families.
She wrote the news that Cayden was no longer a Pryster, that the Pryster family no longer had an eldest son, that he was now merely a commoner, and that there was no advantage in taking him in.
Once this letter spread throughout the kingdom... Cayden wouldnât be treated as a noble. In fact, he might face even harsher treatment. Having been excommunicated without explanation, the other noble families would deduce there was a rift between him and the Pryster family.
So, the families that didnât want to get on the bad side of the Pryster family would know to make way.
This, too, was Asenaâs plan. She wanted all the families to turn against him.
Then, in the end, he might come back, missing his home.
Of course, as much as she wanted that, she also wished for him to suffer. She hoped heâd feel even half the pain she was feeling. She resented him so much for leaving, despite her fervent pleas.
She drafted letters not only to powerful noble families but also to fallen nobles in remote regions. Anyone seeing her at that moment would likely have recognized a madness in her demeanor.
Eventually, she was running low on the sealing wax for the letters.
Even after sending off all the letters she had asked Helen to help draft, her anger didnât subside.
Just as her emotions began to settle, the realization that Cayden wasnât by her side caused them to flare up once more.
She pondered on what more she could do in her fury.
...The Hexter family.
She wanted to inflict harm on that detestable family.
â.........â
Preparing to give voice to her violent thoughts and deciding to call out for Helen, she stood⦠But, she couldnât bring herself to actually speak.
Cayden would soon be headed there.
If.
If she decided to annihilate the Hexter family... it would be inevitable for him, who was to become the eldest daughterâs husband, to enter the war.
And if he were to get seriously hurtâ¦
She did wish for him to suffer... but she also wished for him to return to her side. So, waging war was out of the question.
â.........â
Asena couldnât hide her contorted expression. After the long wave of anger passed... she, left all alone again, began to shed tears.
She caught sight of the Pryster emblem handed to her by Lawrence, which Cayden tore before leaving.
Asena tightly gripped the emblem, which had two snakes entwined.
With this emblem here, it truly felt as if all ties with him were severed. She had no idea how to reconnect. Until now, they were bound together by his status as a Pryster, but no more.
Would she truly never see him again in her lifetime?
Having parted this way, how could they possibly meet again?
Her mind became cluttered. The anger, which had subsided upon his departure, flared up again.
She made the same resolution again.
She will inflict pain upon him in some way or another.
...... So that he regrets his decision and comes back.
--- Â End Of The Chapter ---
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