Chapter 17: The Boars

The boar door groaned wide, spilling hot breath and squeals into the chamber.

Inside stretched a mud-slick arena, hoofprints gouged deep into the ground. The stench of dung and rot hit them like a wall.

The crystal pulsed smugly:

Encounter Initiated: The Boar Brigade (3). Difficulty: Medium+. Attempt: 24.

***

Three massive boars emerged from the muck.

The first was lean and restless, tusks gleaming every time it shifted — fast.

The second was hulking, shoulders like boulders, mud caked into its bristles — strong.

The third lingered at the back, head low, watching them with small, sharp eyes. It didn’t move. It only snorted once.

Leo’s quill twitched in his hand.

Harlada muttered under her breath, “Lazy programming.”

Bert grinned. “Bacon time.”

The boars charged.

They did not have time to react properly.

***

Attempt: 25.

Bert swung his cleaver and was flung backward like a child’s toy.

Harlada tried frost but was trampled flat before the ice even formed.

Leo webbed the air, then was bowled over as all three smashed through him.

The adventurers collapsed in the mud.

The crystal pulsed cheerfully:

Achievement Unlocked: Boar-dumb. Reward: None.

***

Attempt: 26.

This time they tried forming a triangle.

The fast boar darted through before they finished arguing about who was “the pointy end.”

The strong one smashed into Bert like a siege ram.

The third simply snorted once. The other two pivoted and cleaned up the mess.

The crystal pulsed smugly:

Achievement Unlocked: Formation Failed. Reward: None.

***

Attempt: 27.

Harlada insisted on ranged tactics. Leo webbed a tree. Bert threw a rock.

The fast boar ducked under it. The strong boar plowed straight through the web, dragging the tree with it. The adventurers were buried under branches.

The crystal pulsed:

Achievement Unlocked: Tree Hugged. Reward: None.

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***

Attempt: 28.

Bert suggested brute force. He charged headfirst at the strong boar.

The strong boar didn’t even flinch.

They died quickly.

The crystal didn’t bother awarding anything. It just pulsed once, smugger than ever.

***

Back in their cages, dripping mud, they slumped in silence.

Leo rubbed his temples. “Too fast. Too strong. And… possibly—”

Harlada cut him off. “Lazy programming. Nothing more.”

Bert’s stomach growled loudly enough to echo. “I’m hungry.”

***

Attempt 29.

Attempt 29 began with a new tactic.

Not weapons. Not webs. Not frost.

Dinner.

They took the charred remains of a bird and the crispy edge of a rat from their packs. Smoke still curled faintly from the meat.

The boars froze.

The fast one sniffed the air, twitching.

The strong one pawed the mud, drooling.

The third stayed perfectly still, eyes narrowed, then gave a low grunt.

The other two surged forward — not at the adventurers, but at the food.

The party tossed the remains into the mud. The boars tore into it instantly, squealing with delight. Bones cracked. Feathers scattered.

The crystal pulsed:

Encounter Cleared (Pacifist Route). Reward Generated.

***

A pedestal rose from the mud, glowing faintly.

Text scrolled into the air:

New Ability Unlocked: Boar Charge. Requirement: Strength-based class. Cooldown: 12 minutes.

Bert raised both fists. “YES. FINALLY. MY ABILITY.”

The gem dissolved… into Leo.

His eyes widened behind cracked glasses.

+Ability Assigned: Boar Charge (Strength-based). Warrior Leo Vince.

Bert froze. “WHAT?”

Harlada doubled over laughing. “Oh, this is too perfect.”

Leo stared down at his hands, trembling. “Statistically… this dungeon is mocking us.”

The crystal pulsed again, smug as ever:

Achievement Unlocked: Wrong Man for the Job. Reward: None.

The swamp below burbled, laughing in molten joy.

***

The pedestal sank back into the mud, leaving only the echo of contented squeals from the boars, still gnawing happily on roasted bird bones.

The adventurers stood in silence, dripping and bruised.

Bert flexed uselessly. “So. I didn’t get Boar Charge. But that just means my real ability is coming next. Obviously.”

Harlada smirked. “Yeah, sure. Maybe you’ll get Parcour Slide.”

Bert brightened. “That sounds awesome.”

Leo cleared his throat. “Statistically speaking… the dungeon rewards every encounter. If the boars granted an ability, then the parcours trial must hold one as well.”

Harlada crossed her arms. “Or it just holds broken bones and humiliation. We’ve already proven that.”

Leo pushed his cracked glasses higher, notebook trembling in his hands. “Correction: we failed with insufficient dexterity. Now, with my gem and new ability, probability of success is marginally improved.”

Bert raised a hand. “Translation?”

“He thinks he can jump now,” Harlada said flatly.

The crystal pulsed helpfully:

Reminder: Parcour Awaits. Loot Probability: Questionable. Entertainment Probability: High.

They glared up at it.

Finally, Harlada sighed. “Fine. One more try. If there’s a reward, we need it.”

Bert pumped his fists. “YES. JUMPING TIME.”

Leo nodded solemnly. “Parcour it is.”

The mist curled tighter as the twisting sigil flared once more.

They stepped toward it together.