Song: 'New Rules' by Dua Lipa
One, one, one, one, one
Talkin' in my sleep at night, makin' myself crazy
(Out of my mind, out of my mind)
Wrote it down and read it out, hopin' it would save me
(Too many times, too many times)
My love
He makes me feel like nobody else, nobody else
But my love
He doesn't love me, so I tell myself, I tell myself
One: Don't pick up the phone
You know he's only callin' 'cause he's drunk and alone
Two: Don't let him in, you'll have to kick him out again
Three: Don't be his friend
You know you're gonna wake up in his bed in the mornin'
And if you're under him, you ain't gettin' over him
I got new rules, I count 'em
I got new rules, I count 'em
I gotta tell them to myself
I got new rules, I count 'em
I gotta tell them to myself
HANNAH'S POV
"He's an Ambrose!"
"What! No, he's not"
"Yeah, he totally is"
"Eww, no, not at all"
If you're confused about what is going on, let me put your mind to ease.
It's a conversation between two friends who are meeting each other almost after two months. And out of all the things they could talk about, this is what they stuck at.
After a long work week, it's finally the weekend and we're currently at Mila's place, lying in her bed with our feet on the wall.
Anyways, so the context of this 'argument' is that Mila thinks that Elijah Norman is like the character of Rickard Ambrose from the Wattpad story "Storm and Silence", to which I disagree wholeheartedly.
"Yeah, he is. He's tall, dark, and handsome, has a billion-dollar fortune, doesn't talk or smile, insults you at any given point, tests your patience, and thinks you're incompetent. Oh yeah, definitely an Ambrose." she counted the resemblance between both on her fingers.
"But Mr. Ambrose wasn't a toxic man, he didn't marry Lily just to ignore her or belittle her. They got married after an epic love story," I countered.
"Yeah, was he not?" putting her legs down, she now sat like a normal person with her back against the headboard, "All these fictional prince charmings that we fell in love with were toxic until they fell in love, and they are far from reality. We're grown-ups, we know better, now." I sighed agreeing with her.
"Yeah, I guess you're right. But this is not a Wattpad story, this is my life. And I'm stuck with a toxic man for the next two years and neither of us wants to." I said with dejection.
"Huh, to be honest, I don't know what to say either, I mean when it all happened I was so stupid to be excited, I guess I was hoping for fairytale results but obviously that's not happening."
"Yeah, and it won't happen either. Both of us can't stand each other and he never misses the chance to let me know about it. I on the other hand try to manage a civil relationship for the sake of work but that also blows back on me. I'm just stuck in that stupid secretarial work reading case studies and documenting all those ancient files, with almost zero connection with any other person in the office. Why? I don't know or maybe he intends to kill me with isolation."
"What?" she said with shock, "why secretarial work? You're a designer!"
"Oh, thank you for reminding me, you know, I almost forgot" I rolled my eyes at her.
"Oh dude, this shit is really messed up. Why didn't you tell me about all this before? We would've come back right away."
"Yeah, so that Jay could kill me for ruining his pre-honeymoon. Besides just because my life sucks, doesn't mean you guys can't enjoy it."
"Hey but why are you going along with it," She paused but started again, "I mean, why don't you tell him off? Your companies are merging, you're not his employee," she questioned with intrigue in her voice.
I then told her about how when he came back his dad took his secretary and how I ended up being a so-called assistant who assists with nothing but apparently I can't question his tactics since I know nothing.
"Oh my God, Hannah, what's wrong with you?" She shouted and throw a pillow at my face.
"Ow! Watch it" Sitting up opposite her, I threw the pillow back at her.
"Just shut up! Are you really that naive to once again let another man exploit you? God, Hannah, what is wrong with you?" I didn't answer.
"Stop sitting there like a dumb fuck and answer me back" Oh oh, this isn't going to end well.
"I don't know" I mumbled with my head down.
"You don't know? Of course, you do, what happened to Hannah who was ready to fight the world for her dreams? Who wanted to be the best interior designer the world will ever know? Are you going to let all this rip apart only because of one fucking decision your dad took"
"I can't do anything, Miles, you know the contract I..." she didn't let me complete.
"Oh, fuck the contract, you'll waste 2 crucial years of your life because of some bullshit contract?" I guess she saw me looking down playing with my fingers and in no mood to answer her back, so she stopped and took a deep breath, "Hans, come on, what's with this passive thinking, huh, talk to me, please?" she said holding my hand, her voice was much calmer now.
Both of us stayed quiet for a while, she was giving me space while I was searching for answers within.
"What's the point of it?" she looked up at me with confusion.
"I don't have the energy left in me, Mila, I just don't want to fight back. All my life I've fought for acceptance fought to prove my worth and competence, and look where it got me, it made no difference to what I wanted then and it won't make a difference now. It's just two years, I just want to be still, to not fight or to be strong, don't want to prove anything. I just want to be." Mila was crying by the end and I... was not.
I didn't feel like crying. I've pretended to be strong for so long that now my emotions are deeply buried inside me. I don't think anymore, I don't cry... I can't cry. I've just become numb to anything that can affect me.
"I love you, you know that right," she said now hugging me tightly. I smiled and just hugged her back. We stayed like that.
"But because I love you, doesn't mean I'll let you keep sulking in this depressed state of yours. YOU WILL NOT GIVE UP ON THIS!" She detached herself from me with a sly smile that made me question her intentions.
"Come on let's go," she held my hand in the firmest of grip and proceeded to descend from the bed, "Come on, hurry up!"
"Wait, wait, wait, relax, where are we going?" I asked while being dragged with one leg still on the bed.
"To your therapist, of course, it's been quite long, and long overdue," she said as if it's the most obvious thing.
"Huh?"
"Yeah, we're going to the therapist, you're getting counseling and then when you're back to your bitch mode then we'll kick anyone and everyone's butt who comes in your way. You didn't think I'll let you stay depressed, no? I'm back now, baby"
"But, I'm not depressed!" I tried telling her.
"Hannah, we're going and that's final!"
"Okay, okay, but wait, listen"
"What now?" she asked with her hands on the waist, a no-nonsense look on her face.
"It's one in the morning," I said stifling my laugh at her over ambition.
"Ha ha, so funny," she rolled her eye, "Whatever, in the morning then," she said not letting it go "And after that we'll think how to tackle that hottie" She smiled with a wink and I just shook my head.
"Hey, Miles" I called her.
"Yeah?"
"I love you, you know that right?" she nodded her head in affirmation.
"Yeah, yeah, I know" she put her hand around mine, "Now, Milady, the night is young and so are we, do you mind getting in bed with me?" She said with the most bizarre British accent.
"No, Milord, I don't, I shall await for you in my bedding chamber" Mine was even worse than hers.
We both broke out into a hysterical laugh. Getting into bed side by side we greeted each other good night.
Ah, I've missed her so much!
............................................................................................................
Author's note:
Don't we all deserve a best friend like Mila?
Depression is real, please be supportive of all the people around you who you think might be going through tough times. Let's be kind to everyone, who knows what they might be going through.
P.S. A shoutout to my favorite Wattpad Author @RobThier. If anyone hasn't read the "Storm and Silence" series, which I doubt very much, please give it a read as it's a Wattpad classic. It only felt right to put a little tribute to it. â¥ï¸
Don't forget to vote, and comment.
Much love â¥ï¸â¥ï¸