Song: 'Look What You Made Me Do' by Taylor Swift
I don't like your little games
Don't like your tilted stage
The role you made me play of the fool
No, I don't like you
I don't like your perfect crime
How you laugh when you lie
You said the gun was mine
Isn't cool, no, I don't like you (oh!)
But I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time
Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time
I got a list of names, and yours is in red, underlined
I check it once, then I check it twice, oh!
Ooh, look what you made me do
Look what you made me do
Look what you just made me do
Look what you just made me...
........................................................................
HANNAH'S POV
"Again."
Urgh, this is the same word I've been hearing for the last two days, and that too for the nth time.
"Now, what's wrong with this layout?" I finally questioned.
"I don't like it."
"It can't be a reason to reject a perfectly sound design," he's just getting on my nerves now. I've been changing designs back to back and so far all I've got is a no from him.
It takes a whole lot of time and effort to do this, dammit!
"It can be,"
"Alright," I took a deep breath, "Then tell me what you want and I'll do it accordingly,"
"Figure it out yourself. You're the designer,"
"Sir," I clenched my fist to stop myself from throwing my MacBook in his face, "It'll get easier for me to design if only I know your preferences," oh God, the patience I practice to even talk to him.
"Who said it'll be easier?" he finally looked up from his screen and met my eyes.
Eyes that are now so different from what they were that night.
Eyes that are so hard to not get lost in. His deep brown eyes are dead mostly but when looked into closely you realize how deep they are.
There's something about his stare that races up my heartbeat. It reminds me of that night when the intensity of his orbs forced me to close mine because of what they were saying.
I think I saw want in them.
Want for me.
I think I saw longing in them.
Longing for me.
And much more.
So much so that I feel endangered of drowning in them.
His eyes that day were so gentle and telling, so were his kisses.
His touch was so soft that day, it made me feel so fragile and expensive that if not handled with care, I might break.
His full luscious lips rendered me of my senses with their slightest touch.
To this day I can feel the tingling of his kisses in my skin. It still seizes my breath to think about that moment. The soft whispers of his words send shivers down my spine to this day.
But from the next morning, it changed.
Eyes that felt so close then now feel so distant and strange, like they did at the beginning.
And I don't blame him because I pushed him away.
And I don't regret it one bit.
Okay yeah, maybe I do.
But
The regret of stepping away from those few moments saved me from what would come later and stay much longer with me.
I can't take more of his insults and still cave in.
I'm not his bitch.
We're already four months down, 20 more and I'll be out of this.
Back to my old life.
Back to where I belong.
But where do I belong now?
Obviously, I can't stay here after we go our separate ways.
And neither can I go back to my father.
It's not like he would take me back in the first place when he doesn't even take my calls.
Despite being angry at him and cutting all ties, I still sometimes in my weak moments reach out to him but am only met with disappointment because he never picks up my calls.
I guess, he couldn't wait to get rid of me permanently.
This business is all I've got now that still connects me to my parents.
Dad might have signed us up for a merger but this is my mom's hard work. I can't let it be overshadowed by a bigger firm to take all the credit.
No matter how small we are, I still take pride in how we've come so far.
But fuck my luck that I have to answer back to this arrogant asshole with a handsome face.
Reminding me of that, he's still waiting for my answer while I'm busy jumping over thoughts.
"No, I didn't think so. But if you could just..." I looked at him but gave up in between, "You know what, forget it. I'll do it again," I shut my laptop and left.
But fuck my luck again, because before leaving his office I banged into Eva on the door.
"Oh Hey, Hannah," she said with her Vogue magazine smile, "How are you?"
"Hey Eva, I'm good. How are you?" I asked with a forced smile.
On top of her being the love interest of my husband, she's extremely fake as well.
And gorgeous, too.
She never misses a chance to taunt me but always does it in her sweetened voice.
It irks the hell out of me.
Like just be a bitch and move on, girl, you don't need to be friends with me.
And because of that, I can't say anything either because that'll make me come out as jealous.
Which I'm obviously not.
I would've been jealous if she had something that belonged to me but as real as those moments were this marriage is still very fake.
Yeah, I do get this unexplainable weird feeling like my heart drops when I see them together.
"Oh, I'm very fine. Or should I say El knows how to keep me fine," she winked at him. I unintentionally looked at him but he looked the other way, "Anyways, what were the husband and wife talking about alone? Come on, tell me, don't be shy, I'm already a part of it."
Ouch!
Though this marriage is in shambles and almost fake, still it's hard to digest the fact that my so-called husband is openly having an extramarital affair.
"You and probably many others," I said under my breath but loud enough for them to hear, "I should get going," I proceeded to move but she stopped me again.
"Hey, what's the hurry, come sit with us," she held my hand and dragged me back inside, "I'm sure your husband won't have an issue," her grip tightened a little around my arm.
"Eva, what are you doing?" he called her sternly, whereas, I couldn't say anything at all.
Oh God, this is so awkward.
"Hey, it's okay, I'm sure she doesn't mind," she shrugged and sat down. Not knowing what to do I just stood there dumbfounded until she said, "Sit down, Hannah," and I did.
"Good girl, isn't she too obedient, El?" she said with a fake giggle but when she saw neither of us laughing, she added, "I'm joking, guys."
Excuse me?
I'm not her pet. How dare she insult me like that?
I looked at Elijah one more time and found him unbothered.
Of course, what was I thinking looking at him to aid me?
He's probably rejoicing at her words.
He might be but I'm not, I have to retaliate. But before I could do so she started again.
"You know, it's so good to see three of us have such good understanding given the situation, there's no ugliness. It's almost like we're friends."
"We're all adults, Eva, and more over here to work. So I don't think the situation really applies here," I answered as sophisticatedly as I could. Her expressions changed for microseconds but she recovered them back with her signature smile.
"Oh, honey, we are adults, not sure about you, though," she looked at me from head to toe, "And as for work, Elijah told me you're struggling with that too? I mean, I don't blame you, it's not everyone's cup of tea, you know. You're lucky to have connections to be sitting here" she mocked but with sympathy.
"I think Elijah is very misinformed if he said that to you," I looked at him the third time and still not a spec of expression had changed on his face, he was as emotionless as a rock, "And as far as having connections is concerned, I just glad I didn't have to sleep my way through it," I answered her with the same smile as hers.
"What do you mean?" her façade broke down.
"I don't mean anything," I shrugged, "Oh, hey, you didn't take it personally, did you? I was just generally saying," If burning in flames and keeping your posture had a face it would be Eva at this moment, "Now, if you'll just excuse me. See you later, Eva" I smiled extra sweetly at her and walked away.
Two can play the game.
"Hey," she called from behind, "I almost forgot to tell you what I came for. We have a meeting on Friday and you have to present the first draft so we can leave for the site by next week. Good luck," she dropped the bomb on me.
The day after tomorrow is Friday. How am I supposed to do it by then if none of my blueprints have been approved by the man himself so far?
Stopping myself from giving any reaction, I simply nodded to not give her the satisfaction of seeing me shocked.
Once I was finally out of the room and away from their sight from the wall, I took a deep breath.
Every now and then I get to encounter her but this is the most direct she has ever been to rubbing it in my face.
And I didn't like it one bit.
Never have I had the urge to break someone's face this bad.
But right now I have more important tasks at hand.
Buckle up, Hannah, you have a presentation to prepare!
......................................................
ELIJAH'S POV
"Didn't you see what she did, how could you stay quiet, EL?" Eva burst out as soon as we were alone.
I diverted my attention from the screen where I could still see Hannah standing in the corridor with her hands tucking on her hair through CCTV.
"I saw what you did, Eva. That was uncalled for."
"I was marking my territory, she needed to know her place," she said bitterly, unlike the fake smile she had on before.
"I'm not your territory," I had to make it clear, "And you had no right to insult her like that. No matter what happens between us, still, she's my wife and any person whose name is connected to mine will not be humiliated by others, I will not tolerate that. Besides, she's not your headache, from now on refrain before throwing such childish tantrums and embarrassing yourself." it's true, what I do with her is another thing but no one else has a right to talk to her like that on my behalf. I don't need others to fight my battles.
I noticed her looking at me, probably wanting me to say something. But if I did speak up back then it would've only aggravated the situation further.
"Are you serious right now, she insulted me in front of you and I was the one throwing tantrums? I thought you'd like to see her get insulted."
"As I said, keep yourself out of it. Just because we fuck doesn't mean you are entitled or it means something. Before showing her her place, it's better that you know yours," it was important to call her out.
Getting rid of one problem doesn't mean I'd get stuck in another.
And Eva can't be that problem, it's been decided from the start.
We just have consensual sex and nothing else.
Eva knew it all along.
I never made any promises to her neither did I ever give as much as a hint that it could be anything more. If she still chose to stay it was her personal choice.
But in no way does it mean that I'm exploiting her or need to change my stance.
"You're getting fond of her, aren't you?" she threw a question out of the blue.
"Of course not," what is she talking about?
"I'm not blind Elijah, neither am I stupid. You've become so different since she's come into your life and now that you both live together, it's bound to happen, isn't it? Tell me are you fucking her, too?" her voice was filled with rage.
"How can I believe that you're not stupid when you clearly talk like one?" she's lost all her senses in envy.
"It's only a matter of time until she gets off her high horses and gives in because something about you tells me you're more than ready to replace me with her. It's not that easy!" after that she hurried out of my office.
Her words were more than a proclamation.
I pinched my head as I felt slight tension from all the drama that unfolded along with the amount of work that I'm flooded with.
Tell me are you fucking her, too?
This accusation brings back memories of that midnight that I'm trying my hardest to erase from my mind, but somehow they are etched in my memories like the back of my hand.
The more I try to suppress them the harder they come back.
Like a craving for the forbidden fruit.
The feel of her mild scent and feather-like skin almost like that of a baby, so vulnerable in my hands. Each shiver that passed through her body is like a sensation I can still experience. The movement of my lips on her exposed shoulder awoke parts of my heart that I didn't know existed.
The thirst of her trembling yet enticing lips still feels unquenched.
This and many other thoughts of having her so close and in ways that are only possible in my imagination run wild in my mind.
I have to remind myself of the reason she's here because other thoughts of her overcrowd my senses.
But I know her reality and despite what I've let happen in the past, I can't let it continue now.
Hence, I keep rejecting her work.
Her ideas aren't bad, perhaps they aren't hers. But surely needs more work.
But in any case, I will see to it personally that she gets exposed.