Chapter 69: Chapter 67

Song: ‘I keep coming back to you’ by Beth Nielsen Chapman

Seems like after all we've been through

We would have learned by now

Never to fight for gets the last word

It doesn't matter anyhow

But 'round and 'round we go in circles

Trying to work things through

And sometimes it feels like miles between us

But I keep coming back to you

And it's rough

And it's tough

And it's harder than anything I've ever tried to do

But I love you so much that in spite of the struggle

I keep coming back to you

………………………………………………………

Chapter 67

HANNAH’S POV

Once he left, I went back to sleep instantly, as my body felt drained of energy. My whole body aches with tiredness. I woke up a couple of hours later but stayed in bed, still having the same fever as before.

It got me thinking.

I think I saw concern in his eyes but couldn’t dwell on it or even comprehend it because of the past week's events. My body just gave up; the adrenaline rush was gone now, and I felt myself collapsing down.

I don’t know what I intended to achieve with the new design I made over the weekend, but I knew I needed to because it burdened my frail self-esteem. As much as my body kept telling me not to, of course, I didn’t listen and deprived myself of much-needed sleep to cope with the depression. And now, as a result, I’m lying down with no energy to get out of bed.

And, to be honest, I am kind of thankful for it. I don’t know how I could’ve gone back to the office and faced everyone. Everything is still very fresh in my head: the embarrassment, the insult, everyone’s looks, and most of all, his words.

When he came to my room that night to apologize, I couldn’t tell if he was sincere or not because of how drunk he was. I don’t think he was genuinely sorry anyway or at least that is what I believe.

And even if he was, I don’t think I’m ready to process it all yet and let it go. I can’t forgive him just yet, or maybe ever. I can’t find myself to even look at him and not be reminded of how he has treated me. He promised me a fall, and he delivered.

After all that he’s done, how can he say all those things to me about being lost? He seemed hurt and vulnerable. Was he actually honest, or was it just a ploy to trick me again?

I don’t know; I’ve learned the hard way not to trust him. I’ve lost all hope when it comes to the both of us.

Us, what a strange word.

And that is why it confuses me the most: how am I going to take this forward? Two years feels like an eternity of misery.

I don’t know where we’ll go from here, but after some hard thinking, I knew I couldn’t be around him or work with him again. I decided I could step aside from the project, and in the meantime, maybe I could work somewhere else. I wanted to leave the house too, but he stopped me from leaving, and I don’t know why I stopped.

It’s the contract that bothers me; this project will lead to the merger of both companies. As much as I want to break this contract and my marriage, the consequences are very high that I always stop to take any action.

Dad can go to jail, and we will lose company too. Is it worth it?

It’s taking a toll on my mental and physical health; I’m in a dilemma.

I’ve always prioritized everyone else more than myself, and as a result, I’m unable to make a decision.

Am I willing to not be a part of my parents’ legacy, no matter how small it is compared to his company? If I do this, would that make me selfish?

I’ve become such a pushover.

But more than that, I’m afraid of the regret that’ll come with it.

I know I’ve given up already, but have I done enough to do so? Is my reaction justified? Should I push myself a little further?

I can't, even if I wanted to.

He has shattered my confidence.

He has shattered all my hopes and left me in a mess of confusion and self-doubt.

He has shattered me.

I’ve become something I never was.

I’ve always been confident, independent, and fearless.

Now I’ve just become the opposite of what I used to stand for.

He won and I lost; the sooner I accept this, the better.

There’s no point in fighting him anymore.

I never stood a chance in front of him; he was determined from the start and true to his words. I was naive to not take him seriously, and hence, I bear the consequences. What was I thinking?

My phone rang suddenly, breaking the chain of my thoughts. I smiled seeing who it was.

“Hello, au…” I said it with drowsiness, despite trying not to.

“You have fever," she cut me off with a statement.

“Good morning, Aunt Claw,” I called her by her nickname.

“It’s noon, Hannah.” I can tell she’s rolling her eyes. “How are you feeling, sweetie?” she asked lovingly.

“How do you know I’ve got a fever? Superpowers!” I humored her, trying to ease her out.

“You very well know how I know it,” I told Nick, that snitch, “How long have you been sick for?” she inquired like a doctor.

“Since last night,” I said honestly.

“Did you eat anything? Did you take medicine?” She knew the answer, but I tried anyway.

“Of course, I feel much better,” I lied.

"No, you don’t; stop lying," she told me straight away, she could hear it in my voice. “Now tell me, where’s Elijah?”

“In the office?” I said I was not understanding what he's got to do with it.

“You’re sick, and he’s in the office?” she snickered.

“He came in to check on me a while ago,” I said truthfully. Whether it was to check on me or not, I don’t know. “Besides, I’m fine, Aunt Claudia; I can take care of myself,” I assured her.

“This is the problem that you can take care of yourself and downplay your health; please stop acting tough and let others take care of you. This is not right; he should’ve stayed home today to take care of you, unlike Zach,” she said with slight resentment.

“It’s no big deal,” I said earnestly pushing down the sadness at Dad's mention, as I’m used to it.

“It is a big deal, baby. Anyways, you’ve been canceling on me for almost two weeks. Now, pack your bags and get your ass here. You’ll stay with me while you’re sick,” she ordered. “I didn’t ask you before because it was the beginning of your marriage, and especially under the circumstances in which it happened, I wanted you to focus completely on it and work it out, but now we miss having you around.” Did I tell you I love her?

“I miss you guys, too, but I feel too exhausted right now with all the fever and everything.” It’s true, but I said it to avoid it, especially in the given circumstances. “I’ll visit you this weekend, I promise.” I made a desperate attempt to delay this meet-up.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m dying to meet my family, but at the moment, it’s not the right option. The less they know, the better. I don’t know for how long I can pretend in front of them; they will read right through me.

If she’ll get to know it, it’ll only complicate things; she doesn’t know that Dad can go to jail if I decide to step back for the breach of contract, and we’ll lose all rights to the company. Only Nick, Jason, and Mila know about it, and I had them swear off that they won’t tell anyone; no one can get a whiff of it.

My life is already ruined, and even though this marriage and contract were forced upon me, I still consented to them. It doesn’t make sense to evoke more havoc now than when they started.

“I’ll tell you what. How about we visit you and Elijah? Yeah, that’s a good idea. It’ll calm me to see you once myself,” I huffed. “It’s the end of the discussion unless you don’t want us to come,” she said sadly.

“Of course not; I’d love to have you over, Aunt Claudia; you’re always welcome in my home.” My home? It’s anything but that, “You know what? Dinner at my place tonight.”

“Oh no, honey, you’re already sick; I don’t want to burden you.”

“It’ll make me feel better if you’ll come, Aunt Claw,” I said genuinely. It’ll help me keep my mind off of things. “Besides, it’s not like I’ll be cooking or something,” I stated.

“Alright, then, I guess we’ll see you at night,” she gave in.

“You got it, dude,” I said, mimicking Michelle Tanner from Full House.

Once we hung up, I forced myself to get up. I am no better than I was this morning; I still feel cold, my head is throbbing, and I have a slightly runny nose and a couple of sneezes, but that’s not as bad as the fever itself.

After freshening up, I realized I needed to eat something so I could take medicine, though I didn’t feel hungry. I opened the door of my room and halted in my steps, a tray laid out on the front of my door with a bowl of soup and some medicine.

Was it him who left it here?

Of course, I know it was him since it’s just the two of us here, but what confuses me is why did he do it.

I contemplated whether to eat it or not; besides, no war with food, right?

It looks delicious, and you can really use some of it now.

No, thank you. I don’t want anything to do with him; I don’t need his favors.

I picked up the tray and put it on the kitchen counter, untouched, and proceeded to take out milk from the refrigerator for cereal when I felt a little dizzy and my body swayed.

I blinked and shook my head to stabilize myself, but as I straightened up and started walking towards the kitchen counter, my head spun again and my vision blacked out for a few seconds. Before my body could hit the floor, two strong hands gripped my arms tightly from behind, rescuing me from falling.

“Hey, hey, hey, watch out!" The intoxicating fragrance of spicy musk cologne hit my nostrils instantly, making me aware of who it was.

"Are you alright?” He said it in a rushed tone and put his left hand around my waist.

“I’m alright,” I answered a few seconds later as I rubbed my pounding head, his hands still supporting my weak body as it leaned back on his torso.

After all the trauma I’ve gone through with him, being so close to him still makes my heart go faster. I don’t want it, but I can’t deny it either.

“You’re not,” he said sternly. “Your fever has gone up since before; you’re having trouble just standing up, and you haven’t eaten anything either.”

“I said I’m alright; I can manage on my own,” I said as I tried straightening up, unable to let our nearness affect me. He didn’t budge one bit, failing all my plans to create some space between us.

“How are you planning on doing that when you clearly can’t even walk?” Despite my current state, the resonance of his heavy voice spread warmth to my body.

I don’t know why I’m feeling this way because I’m still furious at him; the hurt he caused is still very fresh, and in no way am I ready to let go of it.

I guess these are the side effects of fever; it’s going on in my brain and fogging all the rationality in my body.

“It’s not your concern; now, let go of me.” I lashed out in anger as much as I could at him and at myself too.

“If I did, you’ll collapse, Hannah,” his voice was low and husky.

“I think you’ve done that already.” I feebly turned my head upwards rather than backward because of how tall he is.

Our eyes met and we held each other's gazes for a long, mine unwillingly conveying the hurt he’s caused, while his were less intimidating; they weren’t angry as usual but laced with what could be signified as remorse and something else that I can’t pinpoint yet.

His gaze was not restless or agitated today, but his deep brown eyes were calm and soft; they didn’t hold the same iciness I’ve always seen for myself.

I could feel the thumping of my heart getting stronger. I was still having a fever and a headache, but it got overshadowed by his dominant presence.

His embrace provided much-needed warmth to my body but, at the same time, sent chills down my spine.

I saw his Adam’s apple move as I saw him gulp so up close that my eyes followed his action involuntarily. He blinked a couple of times, breaking eye contact, and huffed faintly.

Phew! That was intense and not something I wanted to happen.

The very next moment, a gasp of shock emerged out loud from within me as he caught me off guard when I felt his arms wrapping around my back and under my knee. It took my brain some time to process that my feet were no longer touching the ground, my arms wrapped around his neck as a reflex to not fall.

Did he just pick me up?

Bridal style?

What's he doing?

“What are you doing?” I voiced my inner turmoil. He started walking with evenly calm strides but didn’t answer.

“Hey, let go of me,” I tried wiggling out of his grip, but to no avail. “Put me down, right now,” I swatted his arm. Boy,  oh boy, now my hand hurts too, but the man didn’t even move a muscle.

Who is he, Thanos?

“Elijah, I swear to God if you didn’t...”

“Shh,” he plopped me down on the couch in the living room as he put a finger on my lips, and I shut up.

He stood too close, his tall figure leaning over me intimidatingly. My breathing has gone ragged, whereas he’s still unfazed like it was not a big deal and like I weighed nothing at all . We stayed like that, breathing into each other’s space.

I felt his eyes traveling down to my lips and lingering on them. His face moved closer, just inches away from mine. His eyes closed, and so did mine, of their own accord.

I panted when I felt his minty breath on mine, the distance between our lips closing in faster.

‘Tell me, what do you think is happening here? First, you fucked off doing God knows what, and then you’re bringing this shit here and wasting everyone’s time. I don’t need incompetent people on my team who are here to just fuck around and...’

The humiliation, the insults, and the abuse came crashing down on me with full force, bringing me back to my senses.

I moved my face to the other side as I sucked in a sharp breath, opened my eyes that I can tell are already tearing up, and pushed him away with all my might.

He opened his eyes with a startle. I can feel his gaze on me as I refuse to meet his eyes. He pulled back and straightened up; he raked his hands in his hair a couple of times and composed himself up again.

Meanwhile, I contemplated my pathetic state for allowing him to get so close to me.

“I’m… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that,” he said, sounding unsure for the first time. “I’ll... I’ll just,” he didn’t complete and turned to walk away.

“Who do you think you are?” I yelled as I finally looked back at him again with frustration.

“You know very well who I am,” he said, as he turned back to me.

“No, I don't, and I don’t want to either. Please stay away from me," I almost pleaded.

“And what if I don’t?” He folded his arms and stepped closer again, but maintained a significant distance this time.

“Stop playing with me, Elijah,” I said weekly, holding on to the tears that were on the brink of falling out. “I’ve given up already, just like you wanted; I don’t have it in me to fight you anymore. What more do you want from me?” I questioned him, not really needing an answer.

He stared at me for a while quietly, then said,

“Very well,” his unreadable expressions gave away nothing once again.

He left, and I closed my eyes again allowing the tears to flow out. I wiped them away rigorously. I leaned back and put my head on the arm of the sofa.

Now, away from his overwhelming and nerve-wracking presence, weariness started kicking back once again, and I felt no energy to move at all.

I would’ve definitely fallen down if he hadn’t come at the right time.

“Eat this,” his masculine voice echoed in the living room, forcing me to open my eyes.

There he stood again with a hot, steamy bowl of soup and medicine in his hands looking as hot as ever in his folded sleeves.

“I don’t want to,” I rejected; the stubbornness stayed intact.

“I don’t care what you want. Eat!” He said sternly stepped closer slowly.

“You can’t force me,” I said, straightening up.

“You don’t know what I can do,” he sat down next to me on the sofa, I scurried away instantly as a reflex, but still, it didn’t create much room between us.

“I don’t need your help.” I looked everywhere but at him.

“I’m not helping you. You can stay mad at me all you want, but after you’ve eaten,” he didn’t back down either and put the tray on my lap. “You can be angry at me, you can be scared of me, you can despise me all you want, but I can’t have you dying on me, Hannah,” his words held unknown reservations of fear.

“I just have a fever; I’m not dying.” I rolled my eyes at his exaggeration.

“You could’ve if I didn’t reach on time.” My eyes shot up at him, and I saw how serious he was.

I let it sink in to see if what he was saying was actually true.

“It would’ve made you happy if that happened, to finally get rid of me,” I said in a low voice, looking at the soup bowl and playing with the spoon absent-mindedly.

“It would’ve made me anything but that,” he said, looking shocked by his own confession, but his eyes didn’t waver one bit.

He stood up again, giving me space, I guess, and unknowingly, I was thankful for it.

Reluctantly, I took a bite of the soup. The hot liquid hit my senses like the first drop of water in the dried desert. I closed my eyes as I savored its delicious flavor; it instantly warmed up my body. I can sense my taste buds thanking me.

This is what a good orgasm must feel like. Eww, gross!

This has to be one of the best soups I’ve ever tried, if not the best. Perhaps if I wasn’t too stubborn, I could’ve eaten it before and avoided all this drama. As I said, there is no war with food.

I can tell he’s watching me, but I ignored his presence, or at least tried to.

He walked away but stopped after a few steps.

“I wasn’t playing, Hannah, not anymore,” he said in a whisper over his shoulder, leaving me in a confused ordeal.

…………………………………………………….

Author’s note:

Sparks are flying everywhere when these two are concerned, but they keep dodging them.

But recently, it’s becoming hard to survive what could be Cupid’s arrow.

Question: Was the soup hotter or their intimacy?

Elijah is coming to terms with his feelings, I guess, realizing that ultimately he’s the one losing at all ends.

Hannah, on the other hand, is oblivious to the fact that what the racing of her heart at his sight could potentially mean.

Both are unable to understand what love is.

Both are stubborn.

Both use their logic, too much of it, prioritizing brain over heart.

Both are fighting their feelings.

Both have their reasons.

But both are unaware of what fate has to offer.

Can the two design geniuses figure out that they are better off as one, or will they be successful in pushing each other away without even getting close?

Stay tuned to find out.

P.S My lovelies, I see a decline in votes and comments, which affects the reach of the story and the overall motivation to write.

Please, it’s a request to not walk away from the story without showering your love and feedback through comments and likes.

Much love