Chapter 17: What Purpose Does a Clock Serve, if Not to Measure Time?

A long-held philosophy existed among humans and demons alike and it asserted that Fortune was a wheel. No one was immune to her pull. Given sufficient time, she would raise up the forsaken and overthrow the triumphant. Wrapped in this belief as though it were a cloak he was drawing tight on a cold evening, Lord Azanth felt comforted, even as his companions entered the Hostelry of Eternal Darkness by the servant entrance and not the great double doors at the top of the marble stairs.

In days past, Lord Azanth would arrive at this celebrated mountain palace by carriage, stagger merrily up the scarlet carpet with a band of party-goers around him, and be feted by the obsequious owner, the demon Quixin. The master suite was always made available to him and Lord Azanth had several times enjoyed arriving unexpectedly, so that some minor noble was obliged to vacate the luxury rooms in a hurry.

Entering by the humble side door, as befit Lord Azanth’s current circumstances, had the merit of being discreet. Behind the hundreds of black windows that overlooked the arrival courtyard, there was always a watcher or three. Up the servants’ stairs – pale, bare ash, worn through use to a polish ­– and Lord Azanth found himself carried into what must be a refectory. Warm air. Freshly baked bread. The clinking of glass and cutlery. Many voices, mostly convivial but two – one male, one female – terribly urgent. Then on again to a cool and soft office, that of the Second Butler. Here, the floor was carpet, the walls were covered with tapestry, and even the large desk between them and the room’s owner had a velvet inlay, like a card table.

The Second Butler was a bulb fiend, round in girth and affable in demeanour, like an enormous, overfed pet cat. Not that anyone should be taken in by the smiles and kind words of a bulb fiend. These minor demons were always jealous and competitive. They were useful if you were a lord with patronage to dispense since they were so eager to advance. Dangerous, though, if they saw you as a rival.

‘I am master of the purple shift,’ declared the Second Butler, ‘and therefore your manager, since adventurers are always assigned to the purple shift.’ He patted a bundle of purple robes with a taloned hand. ‘Wear these any time you are in an area where you might be seen by a guest of the hostelry.’

Bushy eyebrows raised, the Second Butler peered through a monocle at letter whose red wax seal had been broken. ‘Two mages and a monk is rather unusual a combination. You’ll forgive me if I query your effectiveness. Which is the monk?’

The youngest of the humans, Aengus, lifted his right hand and for a while gained the full attention of the Second Butler, before the demon returned his gaze to the letter. ‘This is your first time at the Hostelry of Eternal Light and Darkness. Your desire for rapid quest completions has been acknowledged by Lord Quixin and I will endeavour to facilitate you in return for your services. Additionally, you will each have a room; three meals a day; and a silver coin once a week. Any questions?’

‘When can we eat? The scents in that staff canteen we passed through have got my mouth watering.’ This was Aengus. ‘And it’s been a long day travelling from the portal.’

‘After I have shown you to your rooms, you may return to the purple refectory and ask a scullery worker for a pastry and a hot chocolate.’

‘Thank you,’ Aengus leaned back in his chair with very satisfied air.

The girl, Kate, whom to Lord Azanth’s surprise had agreed to run away with them, raised her hand and the Second Butler gave her permission to speak with a nod of his head.

‘Is there a map we can have? My book about the Hostelry said the tunnels can be a bit of a maze to the uninitiated.’

‘To a human perhaps.’ The Second Butler gave a patronising sigh and pushed himself up from his large chair, golden braid swaying from the shoulders of his purple jacket. That was another characteristic of a bulb fiend, they adored uniforms, medals, ribbons, sashes, and other marks of distinction. From a tall bookcase behind him, the bulb fiend took down a large, leather-bound book, The Memoirs of Baron Nawgle. ‘I can’t let you have this, but one of our guests of a former era drew a map that you might find helpful.’

A red ribbon bookmark was already in place to open the book at the page the demon wanted and although Lord Azanth could not discern the small details of the image, he could tell that it was a map of the mountain that the Hostelry of Eternal Light and Darkness was built upon. ‘We are here, of course.’ The Second Butler picked up a silver letter opener and tapped a sketch of the building on the south side of the mountain. ‘And there is the premises of our esteemed colleagues, on the daylight side.’ He tapped the north.

‘You will see that the author made an attempt at drawing the tunnels that connect the two.’ Now the tip of the letter opener slid along the paper. ‘And admittedly, they do become somewhat bewildering along the branches that descend into the centre of the mountain. You will not be troubled, however, since the main carriage tunnel is unmistakable and much of your effort will be expended in restoring it to proper use. For far too long we have been having to send our guests around the outside on a road that is much longer and rather weather-beaten in places.’

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‘What kinds of monsters have spawned in the tunnels?’ asked Kate.

‘Every kind, from giant arachnids of Level Seven and above in the carriage tunnel, to uroks of Level Twenty or more in the depths.’ The Second Butler had been examining the open page of the book through his monocle. He now lowered the glass lens and studied the three humans once more. ‘I remain concerned at the fact that you are of lower level than the creatures whose task it will be for you to slay. And at the poor composition of your group. Previous adventurers to take service here were at least Level Eight and had a healer.’

‘Don’t worry,’ Aengus reached across the desk and took one of the purple robes. ‘We are much tougher than we might seem.’

‘May your deeds match your words.’

Quest Received

Your group has been asked to restore the carriage tunnel that connects the Hostelry of Light to the Hostelry of darkness. To do so, you will have to eliminate the infestation of monsters that has spread from the depths of the mountain.

Quest Received

Your group has been asked to kill twenty tunnel spiders (repeatable)

Quest Received

Your group has been asked to kill twenty chrono-beetles (repeatable)

Quest Received

Your group has been asked to kill twenty glowpedes (repeatable)

Notifications kept appearing until a dozen new quests had flashed into view. Lord Azanth closed all the messages and if he were still a demon and not a crisp, he would have folded his arms and put his feet up on the desk with a triumphant flourish. To persuade the humans that it would serve their bests interests to take up residency in the employ of the Hostelry of Eternal Darkness, Lord Azanth had found it necessary to stake his reputation as a demon lord with deep knowledge of the planes on their being able to get ranking quests that were easily achievable. His reputation remained intact: these were exactly the kinds of quests he had anticipated, repeatable and straightforward.

Closing the book and putting it back on the shelf, the Second Butler remained on his feet. ‘Shall I take you to your rooms?’

‘Do please,’ said Liam, also standing up. ‘Is it really that late?’ He was pointing to a clock on the table that was under a glass, like a snow globe. The two metal hands displayed fourteen minutes to eight.

‘Haa, haa, not at all.’ The purple-jacketed demon rubbed his talons together. ‘We have not heard four bells yet.’

Even without the skill of Telepathy, Lord Azanth could tell a dissembler, be they human or demon.

If that clock is not for time to measure, then why should it rest there?

‘What do you use that clock for then?’ Had Lord Azanth said these words they would have sounded like an accusation; Liam’s mild tones, however, made it seem as though he were simply curious.

First looking from side to side, the bulb fiend leaned forward on the desk and in a low voice said, ‘our Hostelry is famous across the planes and our visitors come here with complete confidence that night and day are fixed and do not move. For some, this is a matter of life and death. Nothing that you do or say should in any way harm our reputation.’

His voice dropped lower still and his eyes looked down. ‘Chronos is shaking his chains and the tremors in time are causing some unusual perturbations in our otherwise static skies.’

My mind can barely believe this news, yet the quality of truth rings in his unhappy delivery. Chronos unleashed would threaten disaster to all.

‘I’m sure it’s just a temporary restlessness and the mountain will settle again soon. In the meantime, this,’ he tapped the tip of his talon against the glass of the clock, ‘shows the occasional jump forwards… or back.’

Back?

‘Now let me bring you upstairs. After you have refreshed yourselves, you may begin your quests.’

***

‘This is the life,’ Aengus was eating his second apple pastry. The other staff in the refectory, a mix of humans and demons, had greeted the adventurers with friendly cheer and even the chef – despite being busy with preparations for the evening meal – had come over to shake their hands. In equal measure, Lord Azanth had detected relief and expectation in her manner.

‘I still feel guilty for having ruined your future,’ said Liam.

‘I have a future. Just not the one our parents planned for us.’

‘You know what I mean.’

‘There’s always going to be work for a high level monk. I don’t need school and college. I can live according to my true nature: and my true nature is to travel and see the planes for myself.’

‘Well. That’s all right for you. But we can’t both galivant around the planes without breaking mum and dad’s hearts. I intend to go back to college. They might even let me into Senior Fresh without doing my exams if I’ve enough levels and ranks.’

‘I’m going back too.’ Kate put down her hot chocolate. ‘My dad’s arranged for me to start in UL next September.’

‘It’s not fair. You did nothing wrong. You shouldn’t have to move universities.’

‘I know, but I don’t mind. UL’s a lot closer to home.’

Impatience is my middle name.

‘Lord Azanth wants to get started.’

‘Suits me. Let’s go kill some spiders.’