I decided after the death of Mimsy that I would do better. I would be better. I would look after my demons as pets or housemates, not as burdens. Evil or not, I was the one who summoned them. They were my responsibility. I would find them a way home that didnât end in tragedy.
I went to the towel cupboard and unwrapped Storm - I had taken to calling them Storm despite no confirmation that this one was a sentient demon. It might just be another portal like the blood mug, but until proven otherwise, they deserved a name and a better home than a stuffy cupboard. The faint sound of wind still flowed from the vase. I held it before me, put my mouth close enough to feel the subtle breeze, and whispered. âHello, Iâm Charlotte. If thereâs someone in there, I sort of brought you here. If youâre in there, I would like to meet you.â
There was nothing obvious at first, but then there was a change in the wind pattern. It was reacting to my voice. I had felt some form of response before, but this was clearer, more definite.
âI felt your change, but Iâm sorry, I donât know what it means. Can you talk?â
A faint, airy, feminine voice replied, barely audibly, but she spoke words of some strange language. It didnât sound like anything Iâd heard on earth. Some kind of demon language, I suppose.
âDo you understand me? Blow cold for yes, warm for no.â
A distinctly mid-temperature gust hit me.
âUm. That was medium. Colder for yes. Warmer for no.â
A blast of freezing air shot out so hard that I nearly dropped the pot in surprise, and then the voice whispered again in long flowing words, âYour language confuses me. But I understand it. Sorry about the confusing temperature; by my homelandâs standards your medium is my bloody freezing.â
âAh, itâs all relative isnât it? I couldâve been clearer.â
âYou could.â
âDo you have a name?â
âNames are a foolish mortal concept.â
âIâll call you Storm. Is that okay?â
The wind in the vase seemed to circulate for a moment as if in thought, and then another medium temperature gust blew out at me. Well, close enough, then. She wasnât going to kill me over it.
âIâm sorry for shutting you in a towel cupboard so much. I didnât know you were sentient.â
âSentience is a silly mortal concept that does no justice to the complexities of thought and existence across time and space.â
âAre you annoyed about being shut away?â
âI have existed for all the aeons of your world and many worlds before it. I can survive a few of your so-called âweeksâ in a cupboard.â
âRight, fair enough. Have you been to Earth before?â
âEvery storm.â
âTheyâre all you? Even the ones that happen while youâre stuck inside this vase?â
Another medium breeze. âBoth yes and no. Youâre too mortal to understand.â
âIâve been feeling that way about a lot of things lately. Do you know about the place with the river of blood and the plants which think theyâre people?â
âI have been blood-storms there many times.â
âDo you know if one of those plants comes to earth, then dies in a blood-portal-explosion⦠is it really dead or does it just go back to that place?â
âDeath is a silly mortal concept. Youâre too mortal to understand how a demon-spirit flows between worlds.â
âI thought you might say that.â I sighed. I shouldnât judge so quickly, but on first impression, even Kazz was a better conversation partner.
A scorching breeze shot past my head. Evidently my sigh was unintentionally an offensive word in storm-language, but Storm calmed down again quickly.
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âSorry,â I said. âDo you want to get back home? Do you know how to?â
Two bursts of cold air. âBut you wonât like the answer.â
âGo on.â
âYou have to smash this vase.â
âIâve lost a lot of pots - some of those were your fault - one more wonât make a difference.â
âSmashing the vase will release me in the form of a mighty tempest the likes of which this realm has never suffered before.â
âI shouldâve known there would be a catch. But it would be nice to hear something else on the news for once⦠How big a storm? Are we talking storm, gale, hurricane, tornadoâ¦â
âBiblical Cataclysm.â
âOh.â
âI said you wouldnât like it.â
âWell there must be another way. What about back the way you came? How did you get here?â
âHow should I know? Youâre the one who summoned and unintentionally imprisoned me.â
âRight, Iâll think about things. Do you promise not to make a big wind and smash more pots if I put you somewhere else? Is it safe for you to be outside or will you mess with the weather patterns?â
âI promise I will try my best not to destroy your town in a merciless tempest.â
That was not reassuring, but I suppose it was the best I could reasonably expect from a personification of storms and destruction. I took the vase outside. If she broke the promise and created chaos and destruction, I expected she could do it from anywhere, so why risk having her inside next to my pots. It was a calm sunny day, which might be considered terrible weather for a storm. I hoped it would relax her instead of giving her the urge to ruin it. I tried to stop myself from thinking like that. Stop assuming she will break the promise. Treat her with trust and respect, even if she is a demon.
I went back to my room and explained the new situation to Kazz. He listened reluctantly, but at least he listened. I told him all about what happened with my astral projection into Hell and how I accidentally destroyed Mimsy and the Mug of Infinite Blood. He didnât seem very concerned. Empathy was never his strong point, but it was still a little bit reassuring that another demon seemed to think I didnât actually murder Mimsy.
Perhaps death really was a silly mortal concept like Storm said, though she did call nearly everything a silly mortal concept. Once Iâd filled Kazz in on everything that had happened, I moved on to the next problem.
âI know you hate Storm, but I need some advice.â
âStorm? You named a literal storm and the best name you could come up with was Storm? No wonder your dreams taste so chewy and bland.â
âSimple and effective. Better than having âthe Vileâ in your name. That must be like the John Smith of the demon world.â
He did that gurgling growl that Iâd come to understand as Iâm angry and want to argue but canât because youâre right, and then said, âBah! Point taken. What do you need my help for anyway after avoiding me all day?â
âStorm says the only way she knows how to return home is for me to smash the vase sheâs trapped inâ¦â
âSo do it. Get rid of her. Everyoneâs happy.â
âShush, Iâm not finished. The only way is to smash the vase, but and this is a pretty big but - donât you dare make a butt joke - if I do that, it will also cause a storm which she described as biblically cataclysmic.â
âHmm, demons donât throw around words like âbiblicalâ without really meaning it. I see your quandary. If you make a storm, it will be terrifying and everyone will have nightmares, which is good, but I might get blown away in the wind and not be able to eat any of those nightmares, which is bad.â
âYeah, thatâs the main issue here⦠No, obviously I donât want to make a giant storm and blow all the houses down and burst all the riverbanks. That would be awful! What I wanted you to advise me on is other routes to get something back to Hell, or the demon realm, or whatever you call it.â
âWe call it something that you wouldnât be able to pronounce⦠but then again⦠if you try to say it, it might haunt your dreams forever with the evil power of invoking its name. Go on, itâsâ¦â
The next sound he made was something I couldnât even imagine how to write down, but I did feel a lot of evil power in it, so I wouldnât risk it if I could.
I sighed. âStop thinking about nightmares for a second and help me out. Think of another way to get a storm demon back to Hell. Please, I need this.â
âThereâs a cave in Russia.â
âNo flights in lock-down.â
âThereâs a summoning chant⦠you could say it backwards?â
âSounds risky.â
âYou could just let the storm happen.â
âYouâd blow away.â
âYou could reverse the pottery timeline.â
âHumans experience time in a linear path of cause and effect.â
âThatâs a deal breaker on my next three ideas.â
âCome on! There must be something. Do you know how you got here in the first place?â
âNo, you somehow summoned me by mistake but I donât know when or how. It certainly didnât follow any of the normal rules. Usually I have to enter via a nightmare portal in someoneâs psychic aura.â
âBut if I can bring something here, I must be able to send something back, right?â
âI donât know, youâre the one who did it.â
It was yet another useless circular conversation. A nightmare⦠A storm⦠Infinite blood⦠a mimic⦠Why couldnât I have an academy-demon (an academon?) or something like that? Oh, how nice it would be to have one of the leading scholars of Hell, well-versed in the ancient forbidden lore of returning lost demons to the foul chaotic stormstruck wastelands beyond mortal ken. On the other hand, a demon scholar would probably be even more annoying than any of my demonic housemates. Perhaps if I hadnât lost poor Mimsy so suddenly I could have used the astral projection to locate their homes and drag them back that way somehow. It would probably have been a longshot, even if she was still around. There was no obvious answer. A small part of me thought of just leaving Storm. My lifetime would be no longer than a flash of lightning to her, but I wasnât so selfish. I didnât want the next generation to die horribly in an endless storm either.
After hours of thought, I had a strange idea. It probably wouldnât work, but I had the urge to try anyway. I slept on it. By morning neither I nor Kazz nor Storm had suggested anything better. I didnât talk it over with them - it might have more of a chance of success as a secret.