(A/N: Here you go, the much awaited second part of the story. It's gonna get more interesting from here as it's all what you guys been waiting for! So, enjoy!)
***
Part 2: Chapter 11
"Sorry, Ma'am for coming in right before you open up." Keishin apologized as he gave a smile to the owner of the restaurant, a kind lady.
"Don't worry. This used to happen all the time." She gave everyone in the room a smile, as though they were her children. Keishin smiled at the lady's retreating back once more before turning his attention to the group of high school students who were staring at him with innocent eyes, waiting for him to tell them what to do.
Keishin shifted his attention to you as you sat next to Tsukishima, your head downcast as your (h/c) hair hid your face from him. Your brother gave a sigh as he focused his attention once more on the group before him. Standing next to Takeda, Keishin began to speak as all eyes followed his movement.
"Running, jumping and anything else that stresses your muscles will cause the fibers to tear. Right after a match, like now, your muscle are at their limits, so you've got to repair them by eating. That's how you build muscle, and become stronger. So eat. Eat a proper meal."
Keishin took a seat as he finished his speech, turning to give you a smile small. Half way through your brother's speech, you have lifted your head as you followed his every words. You glanced at him, too tired to even force a smile. Keishin simply nodded at you and gestured to the dishes before you, silently asking you to eat.
You nodded in return before facing the front again, but your hands remained still on your lap, not moving an inch. Seating around you, the boys began digging into their food.
"Enjoy." The lady happily said as she continued to cook up food for her guests, a kind smile on her face.
However, you continued to sit there and stared at your bowl of rice as memories of the match against Aoba Johsai occupied your mind. Tears pricked at the corner of your (e/c) eyes as your friends around ate the dishes prepared for them.
You were about to excuse yourself from the table when a hand entered your line of sight. You followed the hand which belonged to Tsukishima who simply placed a meat into your bowl of rice. You continued to stare at the blonde with a blank look, not knowing what to do next. It's as though your brain no longer function properly.
Tsukishima simple raised his brows at you before resuming his eating. You turned your attention back to the bowl sitting before you with the meat on it. Slowly but surely, you let out a quiet "itadakimasu" before picking up your chopsticks and placing the meat in your mouth.
Your (e/c) eyes widen as the familiar taste of meat danced on your tongue. You began to eat dishes after dishes like the boys around you as everyone ate in silence, famished after the game.
Tsukishima looked at you as you took an octopus from a plate the lady just placed down on the table, his eyes not leaving you. Feeling the middle blocker's eyes on you, you turned to face him with your cheeks stuffed like a squirrel. Tsukishima gave you a small smile at the sight before returning his attention to the front, you doing the same.
You continued to eat as tears slowly began to slid down your face like raindrops. Stuffing your mouth with food to prevent from crying out, you left out muffled sounds. Your friends stopped eating to stare at the sight of you stuffing your mouth as tears continuously to fall like waterfalls.
The sight of their assistant coach silently crying while she ate caused tears to fill the volleyball players's eyes. Wanting to give you privacy, they faced the front and continued eating. One by one, tears began to slid down everyone's faces except Tsukishima who simply looked disheartened.
Keishin and Takeda looked at the students before, smiles on their faces despite the loss Karasuno faced. They knew that deep down, this group of teenagers were strong. They would get back on their feet very soon. But for now, it's okay for these students to cry over their loss.
***
Stars shone in the night sky as you stared at the moon glowing back at you, sitting on the swing. You were currently at the park on the playground as you sat there swinging back and forth, your earphones plucked into your ears. You softly hummed as music feel your ears, your (e/c) eyes fixated on the sky.
A gentle breeze blew, ruffling your (h/c) hair as the match against Aoba Johsai filled your mind. You closed your eyes as the sound of Hinata's spike being blocked resounded in your ears. You could see the look of horror on Hinata's face when his spike was being blocked. Your friends were so close, two more points and they could have won. Yet, they lost.
You couldn't stand the looks on the volleyball players' faces when they lost. The looks of horror, disappointment and grimaces still fresh on your mind. And those looks were all your fault. You saw it coming, you knew that Hinata's spike was going to be blocked and yet, you stood there frozen. You wanted to warn them, but the words were stuck in your throat.
You opened your eyes once more, the stars winking down at you. The park was silent except for the occasional chirping of the crickets, but your mind was roaring with thoughts. You wanted to cry, but all those tears was gone, all that's left was a numbing feeling.
You continued to sit that as time passed, the match not leaving your mind no matter how hard you tried to forget. Suddenly, you felt someone tapped you on the shoulder which caused you to jumped off the swing. You turned around to face whoever it was with wide eyes, your arms held up in front of you and ready to defend yourself. Like those kung-fu masters.
"Can you not do that? You look ridiculous." Came a very familiar voice that had you glowering at a certain string bean.
"Seriously? What is it with you and creeping up on me? And what are you doing here so late at night? Are you stalking me?" You questioned Tsukishima, suspicion could be heard in your voice.
Tsukishima rolled his eyes as he approached you, replying. "You don't owe this park, Munchkin. It's none of your business as to why I'm here."
You scowled at Tsukishima's reply before looking at him. The middle blocker was dressed warmly for the cold night, he was wearing jeans, a hoodie and white sneakers, his signature 'somy' headphones resting on his neck. Tsukishima looked like any other teenage male hanging out at a mall with their friends. Except, this is Tsukishima Kei. This is the boy who doesn't hang out at the mall with his friends.
"Take a picture, it will last longer."
"What?!" Your face begin to redden in embarrassment when you realized that you had been caught staring at Tsukishima.
"If you love staring at me, you should take a picture of me so that you can admire it forever." Tsukishima smirked at you.
Your cheeks redden even more at his words. Slapping your hands onto your cheeks, you turned your face away from Tsukishima "A-as if I find your face that good looking. I was just thinking that how could one's face be that ugly and distorted that I had a hard time trying to figure out where your facial features are."
Tsukishima scowled at your words as you smirked in satisfaction at managing to rile up string bean here. Despite being in a depressed mood earlier on, you felt slightly better with the presence of Tsukishima next to you. Not that you would admit it. You leaned against the pole of the swing set and raised your brows at Tsukishima, asking. "What are you doing at the park so late string bean?"
"The same could be said for you."
"Just answer my question will you?"
Tsukishima gave a sigh before turning his gaze to the full moon in the night sky, your eyes following him. The moon reminds you of the male standing next to you. Silent, mysterious and cold. Even his name, Tsukishima (æ島) which means moon in japanese kanji reminds you of the moon. Silence filled the air, before Tsukishima softly said. "I needed to clear my head."
You nodded your head in agreement as once again silence filled the air around you two. Your mind were alive with thoughts about today's match, the loss still affecting you deep to your core. Before Tsukishima came, you were thinking about something. You were thinking that if you only had warned your teammates about the impending doom early, would they have managed to save the ball? Or would they have failed like they did in the match earlier on?
Maybe it would have make a difference, maybe it would have not. However, at least you had warned them even if they couldn't saved the ball. That's where you feel like it was your fault. You were the assistant coach of Karasuno's boys' volleyball team. It was your job to help them in whatever means to win the match. It was your job to warn them. Yet, you failed.
This failure left a nasty taste in your tongue. It made you disgusted at the fact that you were their assistant coach whom they relied on and yet you failed them. Maybe you should have not joined as the assistant coach. This way you would not have been the reason for these boys' crushing defeat. They deserve so much better and with you there, you will just be holding them back.
You have made up your mind.
"What are you thinking about?" Tsukishima asked as he glanced down at you, curiosity filling his mind.
You faked a smile as you replied with a force cheer in your voice. "Nothing you have to worry about."
You can't tell Tsukishima that you were planning to quit the team and no longer be their assistant coach. After all, he is part of the team. Tsukishima gave you a pointed look, not believing what you were saying. "It can't be nothing with the way how you look like as though someone killed your puppy."
"Thanks for the very clear analogy there, string bean." You replied dryly.
"You're most welcome."
You glared at Tsukishima who simply smirked at you. You sighed before giving Tsukishima a grimace, the dimmed light in your usually bright (e/c) eyes causing Tsukishima to soften as he gently nudged you. "Seriously, what's the matter with you? You're usually not like this."
Maybe it was because of the crushing defeat that Karasuno faced made Tsukishima's icy wall to slightly crumble that made him less cold-hearted. After all, Tsukishima was a member of the Karasuno team who fought along with his teammates despite him not being interested in volleyball as much as Kageyama or Hinata does. That explains why you decided to pour out your feelings to Tsukishima, not because he made you warm and fuzzy.
Or so you tell yourself.
You gave Tsukishima a sad smile before you took a seat on the swing again and looked up at the moon, hoping that it will give you strength. Knowing that they would be at the park for a while, Tsukishima took a seat on the empty swing next to you, his feet touching the ground.
"Ne Tsukishima, have you ever want to do something that might hurt those around you but you know that it's for the best? Or at least because you want to protect them?"
Tsukishima raised a brow at your question before answering softly, understanding what you mean as he thought back to his older brother. "I might not have done what you mentioned before, but I do know of someone who did it to me. In the end, it caused a huge distance between that person and me."
You turned to Tsukishima with a curious look, but seeing the bittersweet smile on his face, you decided not to ask. Seeing the curious look your face, Tsukishima immediately hid his emotions behind the walls he had build all those years ago, a passive look on his face. You turned your gaze to your shoes, it would be a lie to say that you didn't felt slightly disappointed that Tsukishima didn't trust you enough to show his inner feeling around you.
Tsukishima looked at you with curiosity and slight concern, wondering what was wrong with you. He has an inkling as to why you weren't yourself tonight. He knows that the crushing defeat that Karasuno faced against Aoba Johsai had left you more upset than usual. The first year just can't figure out what has made you this quiet.
Tsukishima was about to tell you that if you didn't want to talk about it, it's fine. However before he could so, your soft voice reached his ears. "Before you came to the park and scared the shit out of me, I was thinking about today's match against Aoba Johsai. After thinking for a while, it got me thinking. Would you guys have won if I have not been there?"
Tsukishima gave you a confused look, not understanding where you were coming from. "I don't get it. Karasuno's loss has nothing got to do with you being there or not. It was just that we couldn't save the ball fast enough. Even if you weren't there during the match, we would have still lost."
You gave Tsukishima a bitter smile as you explained. "That's what you think. What you didn't know was, I saw it. I saw it coming. I knew that they were going to block Hinata's spike. I saw it even before Hinata spiked the ball. Yet, I didn't warn you guys fast enough. The words were at the back of my throat, but I couldn't say it. It got stuck in my throat. Before I knew it, the whistle blew and Karasuno had lost against Aoba Johsai."
Tsukishima's eyes widen slightly at your confession. So that what's had been on your mind the entire time. But what he didn't get it was, why were you so upset about it? Even if you had managed to warn them in time, Hinata's spike would have still been blocked. They would have still failed to save the ball. They would have still lost.
"So what if you didn't warn us in time? Hinata's spike would have still been blocked. The ball would have still touched the ground since we weren't fast enough. We would still have lost against Aoba Johsai. I don't get why you are so hung up on that. It was just one match that we lost. There's no point in crying over spill milk, what's done is done. Get over it."
Anger boiled in you as you clenched your hands into a fists, your nails digging into your skin. Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes as you stood up and fixed an angry look at the male sitting before you. Tsukishima's eyes widen even more, not expecting your reaction.
"You don't get it, do you?! And I thought you were supposed to be the smart one? It's true that Hinata's spike would have still been blocked. It's also true that the ball would have touched the ground and you guys would have still lost. Maybe it would have make a difference, maybe it would have not. But what you don't get is, I saw it coming and yet I didn't warn you guys. Even if I had said something, you guys would still have lost. However the thing is, I didn't warn you guys! I saw it coming and what did I do? I stood there like a freaking statue!"
At this point, you were shouting at Tsukishima as tears kept coming like rain. You glared at Tsukishima who simply blinked at you, not knowing what to say. You wiped your eyes, but the tears still kept falling. You stood there, your chest heaving at your earlier rant and Tsukishima remained quiet. You stood there for what felt like hours staring at Tsukishima who simply looked at you and not saying anything before you gave a sigh, sagging against the pole. You were tired and upset.
"It's fine if you don't understand. I get it. To you, it might not seemed like a big deal. After all, it was only one match like you said. But to me, it meant a lot. The reason why I feel so bitter was because I saw it coming and I didn't warned you guys. It might not have made a difference. We might still loose to Aoba Johsai. But at least, I warned you guys and that's what matters. The fact that I stood there like a bloody idiot disgust me. I was so stupid. This is all my fault."
Tsukishima looked at you, feeling lost. He wasn't expecting the outburst to be honest. And he honestly didn't know that you were feeling that way. The male simply thought it was childish of you to be so hung up over the fact that you didn't warned them despite seeing it. Now, he knew why you felt this way.
It was because you were their assistant coach. It was your duty to ensure that the volleyball players made it through no matter what. And you have felt that you have failed the team when they lost. You felt that you have failed in your job as an assistant coach. You were blaming yourself for their loss.
Tsukishima thought back to all those times where you work so hard for the team. Staying up late to come up with strategies for not only the team as a whole, but individually as well. Not to mention, the patience and kindness you exhibit as you guide or correct their techniques. You could have continued in volleyball as a player, but you chose to become their assistant coach.
It was because you wanted the best for everyone.
You wiped your tears away, sniffling as you stood there hugging yourself. You were stupid to think that Tsukishima cared for you. After all, this boy has a personality of an ice king. You were about to leave the park when suddenly you felt Tsukishima pulling you into a hug. You blinked your eyes in surprise as Tsukishima placed his chin on top of your head, his arms around you.
You looked up at Tsukishima who easily towered you as he smiled softly down at you. "I understand what you meant now. I'm sorry I made you cry. You might think that way, but no one blames you for the loss. In fact, the team would have scolded you for having such thoughts. Be honest with me, you were planning to quit the team, weren't you?"
Your eyes widen at what Tsukishima said. You didn't mentioned that you were planning to quit the team and yet, he figured it out all on his on. You stared at Tsukishima who went on with a sad smile. "I was right, aren't I? If you want to leave, I will support you. But I'm not sure about the others. I'm sure they will fight to ask you to stay, but eventually they will support you too. However, is this what you really want?"
Hearing those words, your minds began to fill with all those memories you had made with the Karasuno's volleyball team. Memories of you and Tsukishima always arguing, Kageyama and Hinata having lunch with you, discussing about volleyball strategies. Yamaguchi who never failed to make you smile. Tanaka and Nishinoya being idiots that always manages to make you laugh till you cry while poor Ennoshita tries to stop them. Meanwhile, Chikara and Kinoshita shaking their heads at the trio. The third years being the kind souls that they were as they guide and encourage their juniors. Your brother and Takeda scolding you guys.
If you were to leave them, you would definitely miss all those fun times you had with them. Heck, you might not even see Nekoma anymore. You turned to Tsukishima with a bright smile as you laughed, your eyes still glossy with tears. "Who knew that you can be such a gentleman string bean?"
Tsukishima immediately revered back to his tsundere mode as he glanced away with a blush on his face, his arms still around you as he said. "Tch. It would be troublesome if you were to suddenly quit the team without someone talking about it with you. I would have to deal with the idiots and their annoying cries about why their precious crow left the team. I was simply doing myself a favor. Don't get the wrong idea."
You giggled at the blush on Tsukishima's face. "Who knew you were such a tsundere? So cute."
Tsukishima simply replied with a shove of your face into his chest, so that you wouldn't see his face that has become redder. You smiled to yourself before burying your face into Tsukishima's chest, his warmth calming you down as he tightened his arms around you.
The two of you stood like that until it was time to go home as it was getting late. Tsukishima would be lying to himself if he wasn't upset at the fact that you might leave the team. He might not show it, but you have really grown on him and couldn't bear not seeing you at practice, shouting at him to not be lazy during training.
Besides, the blonde haired male preferred a smile on your face as compared to a frown. It suits you way better. After all, Tsukishima thinks that when you smile, it was the most beautiful things his eyes have ever come across. He would do anything for you as long as that smile remains.
***
As you were lying in bed, you thought back to what Tsukishima said. The beanpole was right about you being so stupid to blame yourself for Karasuno's loss. You were such an idiot to think that your teammates would blame you for their loss. In fact, they would beat your ass up for even having those thoughts, especially Suga and Daichi. You shuddered at the thought. With your mind made up, you drifted to sleep with a smile on your face.
Later that day...
"Kiyoko-san!" Tanaka's and Nishinoya's voices could be heard as they called out their beauty manager's name.
Hinata, Kageyama and Hinata turned to the direction of the two second years' voices where they stood at the entrance with joy in their eyes, the rest of the second years standing behind them.
"You're beautiful as ever, Kiyoko-san!" Tanaka complimented the black-haired third year.
"We've come to see you!" Nishinoya added with stars in his eyes.
"We'll follow you forever!" The duo ran with their arms crossed as they leaped over Kiyoko who simply ducked down, sending them flying out of the gym.
"Don't get hurt." Ennoshita warned the immature duo.
Hinata glanced to the second year as he said, confusion in his voice. "I thought you all had today off."
"Then why are you here?" Ennoshita laughed.
"Heya!" Yamaguchi greeted as he and Tsukishima entered the gym, the blonde saying a soft "hey".
"Now, we are just waiting for the third years." Nishinoya said.
"But there isn't club today in the first place." Ennoshita replied, the ever pessimist. (sorry ennoshita! ><)
"Hey, hey, hey. There's no way the third years are going to quit." Tanaka scolded Ennoshita.
Hearing the bald spiker's words, Hinata's eyes widen in horror as he questioned. "Huh? What do you mean the third years... The third years are staying, right? They are still going to spring tournament, right?"
Hinata directed his last sentence to Kiyoko who was approaching them. Before Kiyoko can reply, Hinata's and Kageyama's eyes widen as they heard footsteps outside the gym, followed by Suga's voice. "Crap. Hurry."
Their eyes lit up at the sight of the third years as Kiyoko nodded her head, a smile on a face. "Yeah, we are."
Happiness filled the first years and second years at the news of their seniors going with them to the spring tournament. However, it only lasted for a short while when Suga asked, glancing around for a certain (h/c) haired female.
"Wait, where's (name)-chan?"
At the mention of their assistant coach's name, everyone looked at one another and wondered where could the first year be. Daichi turned to Tsukishima and Yamaguchi to ask about her whereabouts. "Tsukishima, Yamaguchi. You are both in (name)-chan's class right? Do you know where is she?"
Yamaguchi shook his head as he replied his captain. "I'm sorry, I don't know where did (name)-chan went to. The moment class ended, she was out of the door. Maybe Tsukki knows where she went."
All eyes turned to the tall first year who have remained quiet all this time. Tsukishima glanced at all of his teammates, not sure what to say. Sure, he asked you last night to think about it before quitting the team for good. However, seeing that you were not here, Tsukishima assumed you have made your mind to quit the team. At that thought, a frown settled on his face.
Everyone's eyes widen at the frown on Tsukishima's face, disbelief coloring their faces. It couldn't be right. Tsukishima has to be joking. With a nervous smile, Tanaka asked Tsukishima. "You are just playing a joke on us right?"
When Tsukishima didn't answered him, Tanaka's face fell. Seeing the despondent looks on his teammates' faces, Suga tried to cheer them up. "Now, now, not let's jump to conclusion. (name)-chan could be busy that's why she is not here right?"
Tsukishima looked into the sliver-haired's eyes, his eyes telling the third year otherwise. Suga's eyes widen as he stammered. "It-it can't be. It's not like (nickname)-chan to just drop everything and run."
Silence filled the gym as despair filled the team. They couldn't believe. They couldn't believe that their assistant coach who they have come to acknowledge as friend to just simply quit just because they lost one match. Were they so bad that she felt disgusted and left them?
Tsukishima couldn't believe his mind either. This wasn't like you at all. He thought that you were going to stay after what happened last night at the park. Well, the way you seemed to smile convinced the male. Unless of course, you were a really good actor.
Everyone was about to accept the idea that you were leaving them when suddenly they heard the gym door slammed open. All heads turned towards that direction, hoping it was their friend. Lo and behold, there you were. You were bent over as you tried to catch your breath, having run all the way here.
"(name)-chan? You're not quitting the team, right?" Hinata asked, a hopeful look on his face.
Your (e/c) eyes widen at what Hinata said. You turned from left to right, seeing the hopeful looks in your friends' eyes. You smacked yourself in the face. You forgot to tell Tsukishima or Yamaguchi that you'll be late as your teacher asked you to bring the books down to the staff room.
"I'm so sorry everyone. I forgot to tell Tsukishima or Yamaguchi that I'll be late as I was helping Yukino-sensei to carry some stuffs to the staff room." You explained yourself to avoid misunderstanding.
All the players sagged their bodies in relief, glad that you were staying and not leaving the team. You simply smiled in amusement at your teammates' over imagination.
Daichi approached you as he slung an arm around your shoulders as he gave you a noogie, pretending to scold you. "You gave us a scare. We really thought you were planning to quit the team."
Everyone laughed at their captain's action, except you. With a serious look on your face, you turned to them and said. "I was actually planning to quit the team after the loss against Aoba Johsai."
Everyone was stunned into silence at your confession, not knowing how to respond. Until, Suga broke the silence as he softly asked. "But you are not really planning to quit right?"
Your face broke in a smile as you explained, reassuring your friends. "Not anymore. Thanks to a certain person who managed to talk me out of it."
With that, you glanced at Tsukishima who looked away, feigning innocence. Not before long, everyone broke into laughter and smiles as they all approached you.
"You scared the shit out of us you know?" Nishinoya complained as he smothered you against his chest.
"Gomensai, Noya-senpai! But I really can't breathe." You gasped for air as you pushed against the libero, trying to escape from him.
Thankfully Suga came to your rescue. Suga placed an arm on your shoulders as he glanced at you before looking at everyone else. With a bright smile on his face, the setter raised his fist into the air as he proclaimed loudly.
"Let's go to the spring tournament!"
Everyone glanced at one another with excited smiles as they threw their fists into the air, agreeing with the third year.
"ALL RIGHT!"
You smiled to yourself at the team you have come to love. Never again are you going to leave them or even think of leaving them. After all, you're right where you belong.