"Welcome back, Av." A woman, a little older than me greeted.
"H-hello...Q-Quinn?" I replied awkwardly, sounding more like a question than a salutation.
"Yes," she responded, smiling warmly yet sadly at me. "You take your time, okay? Derrick and I will help you whenever we can. Just focus on taking up lighter projects for now."
I nodded, recalling that Derrick was her husband as soon as I saw his face.
It has been a week since I was discharged from the hospital. It didn't help that the intense headaches would come attacking me during the midday while I was trying to recall what happened over the past five years. However, though it was an arduous process, bits and pieces of my memory were flowing back to me.
It still came as a huge shock that I would choose a profession as a jewelry designer as I was sure that I had my mind set on being in the healthcare industry. I wondered for days pertaining to this decision I made, only to be greeted with no answers. Furthermore, it had been a challenge to remember who that man was.
Nathan, was it?
I have yet to see him ever since that episode in the hospital. Mom kept telling me about how sweet and caring he was to me. But looking at how things are going, I beg to differ. If he truly was my boyfriend, why didn't he visit me when I was discharged?
I shook my head free from all the muddling questions as I reached my desk, only to see plenty of files that were piled up high. It was lucky that I have recalled the memories on how to settle these paperwork, as well as a few basic techniques on constructing various jewellery. However, looking at the number of folders, I was going to clock in for some additional overtime hours before I could start any tinkering.
Folding my sleeves, I jumped straight ahead, sifting through the sheets of documents and invoices as I typed vigorously over the keyboard. The noises around the office dulled as the only thing that I could focus on was the screen ahead of me. My persistence to clear at least three-quarters of this stack had led me to neglect my lunch hours. Yet, I didn't feel any hunger at all.
"Here, we got you a little something." Quinn said, passing me a sandwich and a cup of coffee. "You need to rest, Ava. You've been working nonstop for the past six hours."
"I'm alright," I replied, receiving the food gratefully. "By the way, how much is this?" I asked. Despite their act of kindness, I did not want to take anyone financially for granted; a part of me felt embarrassed and a little guilty.
"Oh! It's fine." She responded, fumbling her dress. "Most importantly is that if you're going to work through the night, it's best for you to take a little break." I smiled, tearing the clear plastic before biting on the sandwich, an indicator that I was complying with her instructions.
After a short ten-minute break, I resumed back to work for another three hours before I could hear the shuffling of feet and goodbyes being exchanged. Seeing the other colleagues leave their desks as they skipped towards the elevators made me clench in jealousy.
That would have been me if I didn't have my head cracked open.
It didn't take long before Quinn and Derrick left their desks, leaving me alone in this huge office. Sighing, I closed and rubbed my eyes, worn out from the hours of staring at the screen. Nonetheless, I was relieved.
What I thought would take two days to complete, was accomplished within nine hours. It was a grand achievement. But seeing the piles of blueprints I have left; I knew that I could only construct two simple-designed accessories.
I can do this!
Slapping myself on the cheeks in hopes that I'll possess newfound alertness, I made my way over to the pantry to get a cup of coffee before proceeding to the design area; switching on the machines before taking a big gulp of caffeine.
The hesitation to make the first move kicked in as the subtle shake of my hands gripped and instilled tension within me. Taking in a deep breath, I stared straight at the machine and the piece of metal in my hand; hoping that what comes next will be handled by my accumulated muscle memory.
Slowly, I pushed the thick piece of round wire through the machine, causing it to thin and lengthen into an object that is suitable for shaping.
This is going great.
Unfortunately, the momentum was cut off as I heard someone come through the door, prompting me to halt whatever I was doing.
It's him.
As soon as our gazes met, I gave him a quick nod, quickly recalling that though he was my 'boyfriend', mom said that he was also my boss.
He looked tired. And as compared to before, his cheeks looked sunken, and his eyes appeared as if they lacked life. As I felt a wave of worry wash over me, I couldn't help but wonder if he was alright.
"Good evening, Mr. Crosby." I greeted, deciding to call him by his surname as it would feel awkward if I were to address him by his first. "What are you doing here?" I asked.
It was indeed peculiar and utterly strange that him being here provided a profound sense of comfort that I was unable to comprehend. Yet, at the same time, it felt like we were strangers.
"This is my building. I can do whatever I want." He said coolly, before he took a seat in front of me. Somehow, I felt a little irritated at his reply that almost tempts me to slap him across the face. But of course, there was no way that I could do that, not unless I wanted this job. After all, it has been my dream to work in Estelle; or so I remembered.
As soon as I returned to my work, his question halted me once more.
"How have you been?" He asked while fumbling with his fingers.
"Why are you acting worried if you didn't even bother visiting me after that day?" I spat.
What?
In truth, I was shocked at my reply. Never did I expect that I would respond in such a manner. It felt as if an unknown anger had tugged and pulled upon my heartstrings, making it taut and threatening it to snap.
"Why? Do you remember anything?" He inquired, as I saw a small flicker of light in his eyes.
"No." I simply said, seeing the light die down. "But somehow, I feel anger. I don't know why. Mom says that I've brought you home a few times and that she has never seen me this happy ever since Adrian."
It was strange that the last thing I could remember from five years ago was the night when Adrian had cheated on me. After that, everything else was a blank. And for the past week, my memories about the conversations and friendships that I have built with others over the past 5 years seem to have returned; everyone except for Nathan.
"I'm sorry that I can't remember you." I added, "could you maybe...tell me more about us? And how we even got together? It may invoke some memories."
I was curious about my relationship with this man. Sure, he was handsome, but despite my memory loss, I felt a strong connection with him, as if we have been together for a long time.
"No."
"What?" The sudden pause led me to look at him in confusion.
What does 'no' mean?
"You are mistaken to think that we were ever happy. In fact, it was anything but happy." The weight in his words left a huge boulder stacked on my chest.
"Is it? What happened?" I pried, pressing for more answers; unable to ignore the pressure from his words.
"You don't have to know, because I've come to tell you that I'm breaking up with you."
"I-I see." The voice shook and wavered as I felt an unknown yet overwhelming sadness course through, while at the same time, for my eyes to start watering.
Quickly, I grabbed a plier that laid at the side before getting busy, in hopes to distract myself with the work in front of me as I proceeded to shape the metal into a circle of the desired ring size before cutting it off with a handheld hacksaw.
"C-can I know the reason for your decision?" I questioned, taking everything I had to remain calm and composed.
"I got tired of you, that's all." The simplicity in his reply led me to bite hard on my lip as I didn't dare to look at him; for fear that I would break down. I clutched onto the blowtorch before letting the flames melt the metal to fill the gap.
"I'm sorry if I was annoying or irritating you in this relationship that I could not remember. Afterall..." My chest grew heavier, as I felt my stomach drop while I thought of these words.
"Afterall...who needs a girlfriend that can't remember her lover? It would be waste of time trying to get her to remember everything from the past without any proof that she is even going to recall it one day."
I switched off the blow torch and made a painful mistake that an amateur designer would do. The sting and scalding heat of the metal burned the flesh of my fingers, sending the tears that I have been holding back to run free while I winced in pain.
"Shit!" Nathan pounced into action as he grabbed my finger to run it under the cold water. The heat from the affected area cooled considerably. Despite so, I found myself sobbing quietly, unsure if it was because of the pain of the flesh or of the heart. But one thing is for sure, I was heartbroken.
Just then, a recollection sprung forth as soon as his skin touched mine. The vision of him bandaging the deep cut on my hand. It was a short scene of when we sat in my office. The blackout.
"Are you feeling better?" His question cut me from my thoughts, a voice dripping with concern and distress. Even his eyes spoke of one that seemed to be struck with hurt.
"Yeah..." I croaked, attempting to soothe and bring all emotions under suppression.
"Wait here. I'll get the first aid kit." He informed, taking long strides towards the cabinet located at the exit.
"It's alright. I'm feeling much better." I quickly announced, not wanting to be a burden to him, nor did I want to appear pathetic in his eyes. Because at the end of the day, I was just a girl that he got tired of.
"Do not mistake this as me caring for you." He snapped. "I simply have no use for employees who can't look after themselves."
I have no need for employees who can't take care of themselves!
"What did you say?"
"I said..." The pause led him to hold a face of contemplation as a sense of familiarity whiffed across my mind. "Never mind."
I stared at Nathan, watching the same scene re-enact before my eyes as he gently clasped my fingers, blowing and dabbing the affected area dry with much care and caution, as if afraid that any subtle movements would bring forth immense pain.
Instinctively, I stretch out my left arm to trace his features; from his hair to his cheeks before cupping them, making him halt his actions.
With our gaze now holding each other, his hands reached up to envelop mine. That warmth that my body reacted to, felt so accustomed to his touch. It was something that I didn't know I had been craving for.
"Something like this happened before, didn't it?" I searched through his feelings, revealing it to be a burdened one. This man before me was in pain, and I hated it. I wanted to help him.
"I know that there are limited things that I can remember about you, but you can trust me with your problems."
Hastily, he pushed my hands away from his face and tied up the gauze. "There are no problems."
"Then why do you look like you're hurting?" I stood up, feeling a surge of urgency to obtain an answer as his figure approached the door.
"Good night, Miss. Winters."
As the doors closed, his absence stole the warmth and comfort; leaving the remnant cold to swallow me whole.
Don't go.