Another week has passed since that night. My mind has been plagued with the never-ending visions of Nathan, replaying in my head like a broken recorder. There were times where I was looking forward to seeing him, while there were other instances that I felt as if our time as lovers were over, and that the less we were seen together, the better.
Yet, there was a raving hunger that compelled me to touch him once more. Just once, that I felt would be sufficient to quell that thirst for him. However, the thought of this tempted me to give myself a smack across the face.
I sound like a pervert.
"Hey, Ava!" Timothy greeted. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm doing great!"
No, I wasn't.
I was drowning in work. Since I was a liaise for the Crimson Solitaire, Timothy thought that it would be ideal for me to be part of the planning team.
Thoughts drifted back to the day when I felt immensely perturbed and vexed on the possibility of me losing those exorbitant accessories while I was getting my head cracked open by a bunch of hooligans. It would take a lifetime of working to pay off a teeny tiny gem, probably even to my grandchildren's generation.
Thankfully, my quiet and troubled mind was laid to rest when Timothy had explained that the jewelry was safely recovered, sitting securely and comfortably in the company's safe.
Nonetheless, the problem remains. A team of five for a huge event was surely, what you would deem as 'direly understaffed'. It has become a usual routine of mine to be the earliest bird in the office to an owl late at night.
And so here I was, possessing two plates that were unreasonably large for my hands to support. One, was to find myself immersed and overwhelmed in sorting the list of important guest names and VIPs, to make sure that each seat is carefully allocated based on past and present patronage to Estelle. Second, was the poor me, trying to fulfill the demands of my customers' orders.
I am definitely underpaid.
"So, how's the planning going?"
"It's going well. Just a few more names before I'll start sending out the personal invitations." I informed, basking in a hint of self-pride for accomplishing this enormous task within a short time frame.
"Good." Timothy gave me a warm smile, looking at me with appreciation in his eyes. "By the way, Mr. Crosby would like to see you. I was tasked to escort you to him for lunch. He should be done with his client."
"What for?" I inquired, feeling the nervousness and excitement mixed with the lingering sadness from our previous encounter.
I've come to tell you that I'm breaking up with you.
I got tired of you, that's all.
Those words of his did cut me deep, deeper than I thought it could be due to the lack of my memories. Nonetheless, work means work. And those personal feelings of mine are just something to be masked up and kept away.
"He has something to discuss about the upcoming exhibition." He notified. "Shall we?"
***
"That'll be all." Nathan announced, prompting the guy in a tuxedo to stand and reach for a handshake. It did not take long before Nathan signaled me over, gesturing to the seat before him before calling the waiter, who came running with two menus in his arm. A heavy silence descended as we glanced through the lists of cuisines; the occupancy of an uncanny awkwardness.
"Hey! Ava, right?" A voice called out the moment the waiter carried our orders to the kitchen. The hand that was pressed on my shoulder prompted me to look back, only to be greeted by the last person I wanted to see.
"Adrian..." I replied coldly, not bothering to give him a second glance while I pushed his hand away from my shoulder. Though it has been five years since the cheating, forgiveness is something that I have come to terms with, but to forget, was another individual factor that remains difficult.
Those perfectly puckered lips and wavy hair looked the same as before. The only thing that changed was my feelings for him. The right word to describe it would probably be 'exterminated' or 'extinct'.
"What are you doing here?" He asked, failing to read the atmosphere as I had my back towards him, taking everything that I had to not have my eyes rolling.
Just how thick-headed is this guy? Did he inherit that from Jessica?
"Business." The plainness in my reply was one that I had hoped he took a hint that it was time for him to scram. But unfortunately, that did not turn out the way I wanted it to.
"Wow, look at you! Looking all dolled up and professional." His chuckle sounding a little sarcastic while I took a sip from the glass of water to douse the fire. Peering over, Nathan looked like he was on the verge of his seat, staring intently at every action Adrian made, as if he was ready to call for security.
"Anyway, I was wondering if you would like to join me for a cup of coffee once your business is over? You know, for old times sake?"
Where did he get the gall...
"I apologize, but I would have to turn down on your invite," I responded as professionally as possible, drawing a visible line between us both.
"Oh, don't be such a party pooper." The heat from his palm warmed my shoulder once again, this time, giving it a soft squeeze; one that propelled me into disgust. "I'll make it up to you for what I did in the past..."
"Get your damn hands off her." The sound of the chair that was abruptly kicked backward, stunned both Adrian and I as our attention drew towards Nathan who was burning in fury.
"And who are you?" Adrian sneered while I struggled to push his hands away.
"He's my boss."
"I'm her boyfriend."
The both of us said in unison, plummeting me into a blushing state while Adrian on the other hand, jeered mockingly, amused at the scene that unfolded before him.
"So, which is it? Knowing Ava, she is not one to lie. In fact, she is terrible at it." Adrian proceeded to remove his hand before strolling over to Nathan. "So, which is it, big guy?"
"I am first her boyfriend, then her boss." Nathan replied in a challenging tone, glaring straight at him.
"Oh really? Then I guess you are one of a kind to tolerate this prude woman. After all, it took me months and I still couldn't shift our relationship to second base. A man can only tolerate that much, Ava." His attention shifted back to mine, revealing just how blind I was to have been dating this swine.
Then, the sound of a cracking bone broke the tension in the air as Nathan's fist collided into Adrian's jaw, causing the patrons to draw back huge gasps that were mixed with high-pitched screams and shrieks.
The force sent Adrian tumbling backward into the next table, pulling the tablecloth along with the dirty dishes to the carpeted floor.
"You stay away from her. Do you hear me?"
"And if I don't?" Adrian taunted. Nathan, who was now raging from anger to utter madness, dripped with violence; taking a few steps forward, ready to hurl another fist into his face. But before he could make a lunge forward, I threw myself in front of him, taking him into my arm. The tension in his muscle relaxed considerably as soon as we came in contact.
"Stop! He's not worth it-"
"If that's the case, I wouldn't mind getting down on one knee right now, babe."
"Then maybe you should."
The influx of visions swept in like a flood, prompting me to stumble backward as I felt my knees grow feeble. If it wasn't for Nathan who held me tightly, I would have made a fool out of myself.
"Are you alright, Ava?" He muttered in low breaths; anxiousness evidently written in his expression.
"I'm okay." I replied, massaging the dull ache on my temple, one that I had grown used to. "Just a little out of sorts."
"Surely you don't mean that, sweetheart?" Adrian continued, standing to his feet while wiping the blood from his cut lip. Nathan's muscles grew taut once more as he bit his lip in vexation.
That bastard.
"I'll handle this." I asserted, still feeling a little weak.
With my hand dropping to the side, I strolled over to Adrian, using my thumb to press against the joints of the fingers on my right hand; earning a soft crack before I proceeded to stretch the digital muscle.
"You'll handle this?" He goaded. "What are you going to do with that weak slap of yours? You couldn't eve-"
Exerting every ounce of strength from my back before channeling them to my knuckles, the feet that I planted firmly on the ground acted as a fulcrum as I shifted my weight forward, pummelling the swine with a heavy strike; the exact location where Nathan had landed his fist.
The movement of his head from the impact prompted my fists to extend forward and meet his nose before he was seen having his butt kiss the floor. This time, with the sight of blood freshly squeezed from his nose.
"You! You will pay for this!" He shouted while pinching his nose.
"And why should I? Weren't you the one who jeered on about that weak slap of mine?" I stared him down, as if I were a predator and he was my prey; with him resembling more towards an insect.
"But you know what? Do what you will. You are nothing but a man-child, a person who doesn't have the guts to own up to his mistake." I squatted in front of him before patting against his cheek, mockingly. "But truly, it pleases me to have the opportunity to see you in such a pitiful state."
The dull ache on my knuckles prompted me to conceal the pain; a pain that though was unpleasant, possessed much satisfaction. "So long, dickhead."
"Ava, wait up! Ava!" Nathan yelled louder before I was soon roughly tugged back, oblivious to the incoming bicycle that could have put me back in the hospital.
"Ah!" The dull ache that I felt intensified as I pounded a fist against my temple.
The memories were the same, except that instead of a bicycle, it was replaced by a horse.
What is going on?
Who is Fredricks?
The cusses from the angry cyclist were drowned out as I pondered if this was my delusion or reality. I could no longer recall what's real from naught.
"Are you okay?"
"Y-yeah..." Seeing how flustered and unsteady I was, Nathan whipped out his phone and dialed for Timothy who arrived within ten minutes to escort us back to the office.
"I'm sorry." Nathan said, sounding guilty and apologetic over the previous event.
"It's not your fault. I was just blind to even notice just how much of a loser he was. A loser that I nevertheless, dated."
"You are not blind." He stated, staring straight at me as we were seated on the couch in his office. "You just love a little too much, that's all."
"But that itself, is what I adore about you." He murmured. Though soft, the tingles from his words, spread like wildfire, lighting every crevice and corner of my body.
"Ahem- So, uhm... What did you want to tell me about the exhibition?" Shifting away from his intense gaze as I thought about his words from the other night.
"I got tired of you, that's all."
In truth, I was feeling a little confused and muddled by his sudden confession.
"Here," Nathan handed me a paper which I unfolded to reveal a map with a four-digit number at the bottom right corner.
3469.
"That's the number for the safe. The Crimson Solitaires are in the red casings; attached with a specific tracker. And you are to take this specific route to the auditorium in the next building. There will be escorts following you as well, to make sure that nothing is stolen and that...you are safe." The last few words came out as a mumble, yet, clear enough to be comprehended.
"But why me? I don't understand why this responsibility is given to me when I had lost it the last time." I asked, baffled at Nathan's decision.
"Because you are the liaise between Estelle and Hugo. And Hugo has made it clear that you are the only one for the task." I nodded knowingly. "By the way, Hugo sends his greetings. He won't be able to attend the exhibition due to a few overseas projects. Also... he feels at fault for what happened to you; for not being able to escort you to safety that day."
I was left at loss for words, unsure if I should feel thankful for his care or forgiving for his demise. Nonetheless, none was at fault. It was just pure bad luck.
"And...I am sorry for not being there for you." I could hear Nathan take loud gulps, seemingly nervous about this conversation. "I'd hope you would forgive me."
"There's nothing to forgive. It's not your fault." Giving a sad smile, I peered up at Nathan.
He sounded broken and exhausted. For whatever chains that were holding him down, I wished for nothing but his freedom, for his deliverance from the guilt and sorrow that were drowning him in entirety. It burnt a hole through my heart, instilling the desire in me to glue the broken shards back to what it once was.
"Nathan, I-"
"You may leave."
"What?"
"You may leave." He repeated, a little louder this time, sending me into a tumultuous confusion. Shaking my head, I walked towards the door, ready to admit defeat at the sudden and abrupt changes in his demeanor; a moment cold and distant, and another, hot with the display of much intimacy.
It frustrated me.
"Why don't you tell me about us? Hmm? Why are you making me confused with your actions?" My sudden outburst boomed within his office, catching Nathan off guard. "Why must I depend on myself to get snippets from a memory that I don't even know if it's a memory or an imagination?" I broke.
Tears pricked from my eyes, flowing freely to my chin as I trudged towards him.
"Here I am, trying to remember you. But there you are, ready to abandon me when I'm still feeling so lost. WHY?!"
With my fists clench and pounding against his chest, I was swooped into an embrace, crushing my arms between the both of us. This man before me made me alive. His touch, his scent; everything about him made me nuts.
"Why did you say that?" I spat, feeling a surge of confidence as I pushed away from him. It would have been difficult to say this before, but with these few pieces of recollection, it became clear that whatever I was about to say was worth a shot.
"What do you mean?"
"Why did you say that you were my boyfriend when you were clearly just someone who got tired of me?"
"I said it to make that prick leave."
"Bullshit!" I scoffed, knowing that Nathan would have used this as an excuse. "Then why do you always look at me in pain. Why do you look like..."
"Like you're still in love with me?" I muttered. Nathan remained silent as I had my head lowered, staring at his feet. I didn't dare to look at him. A part of me held hope that the feelings from our past relationship would retain in his heart; just as I have.
"Ava..." He proceeded to cup my cheeks, pulling my gaze back to him.
Again, his eyes were swallowed in grief, a look that makes me want to chase his fears and insecurities away. "I need you to trust me."
"Trust me, Ava. I'm yours."
Another scene surfaced in my head; a sweet moment shared between us.
"I won't let any harm come to you ever again. I promise." The desperation in his eyes told me that this was something bigger than the both of us, something that was beyond Nathan's control. But I did not care if it was one that would put my life in danger. All I yearned for was this man in front of me. I needed answers.
"And how do you know what is and isn't going to harm me?" I questioned. "How do you know that aren't doing that right now?"
If anything happens, I implore you to not keep me in the dark. Let me share your worries and pain. Let me be the shoulder that you can rely on. Even when nobody is on your side, I will remain. Okay?"
Nathan remained tight-lipped, appearing as if he was torn on the inside out, treading on a thin thread that was on the verge of snapping.
Sighing, I turned my back against him and headed for the door, knowing that it would be futile to push him any further.
"Even when you have given me nothing to trust, my confidence in you has never wavered. But just know that trust, works both ways. And it will come to a point where it will be difficult for me to do the same."
I exited the office, consumed with hurt and misery that weighed down on me. Despite so, I was certain, with the only acknowledgment that my heart was reserved for him, and him alone.
*******
Hello everyone!
Just a few more chapters before this book ends! How do think things are going to turn out for Ava and Nathan? Will they finally be together?