âYou mean that it is the fate of the Crown Prince to be unhappy?â
âOf course not. However, it is one of the many things that is expected of my position. You, Layla, probably will not know of this and I personally hope that you remain unaware of this reality for the rest of your life.â
Even while explaining his misfortune, the Crown Prince remained concerned for Layla. The kindness and consideration shown to Layla had in turn made her more sad for the Crown Prince.
âLayla, are you worried about me?â
âIâm not worriedâ¦â Layla began to deny out of habit but stopped when she raised up her head and saw his bittersweet smile. After a moment of hesitation, she admitted, âYes, Iâm worried.â
âThank you. Your warm heart remains a comfort for me,â Bioust replied before drinking the wine from his glass.
Layla watched as Bioust drank the wine. She was unable to turn away from the sight of his Adamâs apple bobbing up and down as he continued to drink the liquid.
âIf I had a choice in my marriageâ¦â
Bioust said with a face that was slightly flushed from the alcohol.
âIf I was able to marry the person I loveâ¦â
Bioust held up his glass as he stared at Layla. Although no further words were uttered, it was as if his eyes were explaining the remaining bit of his sentence.
At that moment, it seemed the same for Layla as she stared back into the depths of his eyes, unable to look away. For such a powerful man, there was a sense of sadness and desperation in his eyes.
Seeing that only made Layla want to do something about the whole situation. If possible, she wanted to put a stop to the Crown Princeâs unhappy marriage.
âI donât want him to have such a sad expression,â Layla thought to herself.
âBut there is nothing I can do. Iâm not a Dukeâs daughter like Elizabeth. Iâm just the daughter of a Baron and even then, Iâve been abandoned by my own family.â
âThere is nothing I can do for him; be it to cook, sew, or organize books⦠If I were a real witch, I can just cast a spell and use my black magic to help him out. But in reality, Iâm not a witch. Iâve neither powers nor abilities⦠All I can do is to look at the kind man with the unsaid affection I feel for him.â
* * *
After much consideration, Layla came to a decision and looked straight ahead only to see that Bioust had been watching her the entire time with the gentle smile he had always given to her.
âDo you have something to say?â
âYes, how did you know?â Layla asked.
âThatâs because you have a somewhat serious expression today,â Bioust replied as his smile widened, causing Laylaâs heart to beat faster.
âHe is the first person to ever show kindness to me⦠The first to ever smile at meâ¦â Layla thought to herself.
âI want to help you.â
It was natural to want to save a person from the depths of misery.
âLayla, youâre already helping me enough. Cecil has informed me that the library is now very clean. Iâm already thankful for that.â
âNo, not thatâ¦â Layla trailed off in a sad tone.
Noticing the change in Layla, Bioust watched her with a confused look.
âI⦠I donât want you to marry her.â
âAhâ¦â
Bioust exclaimed briefly and there was a moment of awkward silence.
âYou will be unhappy if you marry her.â
âThat is possible, but it may not be the case.â
âNo, it definitely will be.â
âHow do you know so well when it is something only a married person would know?â
As if not wanting to continue the conversation, Bioust attempted to make light of the situation.
âI know because Iâve lived with people who didnât like me,â Layla explained.
ââ¦â¦.â
âI know because Iâve lived with people who hated being in the same space with me. People who looked at me with disgust and refused to even make eye contact with me. The worst part is to be family with the people who hate me.â
âLaylaâ¦â
âI want you to be happy because⦠youâre a good person.â
Layla spoke with as much courage as she could muster. It was the first time she had ever explained her unhappy past, as well as to wish for someone elseâs happiness.
âI will not say that my heart pounded every time I see you and I wonât ask you to marry me so that we could live our lives like this. To just have meals together and enjoy each otherâs company⦠Iâve said all that Iâve dared to.â
âTo be honest, I wish I could marry the person I love,â Layla confessed.
Bioust looked at Layla with a solemn expression as if he knew who she was referring to. Layla trembled when she met his gaze.
âHowever, Elizabeth is already my fiancee. Moreover, she is no small or average aristocrat. She is the daughter of the powerful Remote Duchy.â
âI knowâ¦â
âI am nothing but a powerless, abandoned daughter of a Baron.â
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âUnless something happens, the engagement would be impossible to break.â
âUnless something happens like what?â
âFor example, if I dieâ¦â
âThereâs no point in breaking the engagement if you die!â
âThe only way for the Remote Duchy to give up on the engagement is if I were to become lame, blind, or disqualified to inherit the throne.â
âTo be disabledâ¦â Layla just said softly.
âA fate that can be changed at the cost of certain body parts⦠Iâd be willing to do that if it were to change all of my misfortunes⦠If it is to rid myself of this stench, Iâd willingly give away my feet, arms, or even eyes. Whatever it takes.â
âBut that will be my problem. It is different for Bioust. Unlike the ugly me, he is a very handsome man and has a perfect figure. Moreover, the process of making him disabled will obviously be very painful⦠I hope that Bioust will never fall ill or endure pain.â
âThat was just an example, Layla. I donât want you looking at me as if Iâm really going to harm myself.â
â⦠I didnât mean toâ¦â
âAnyway, what Iâm trying to say is that I will not tarnish Elizabethâs reputation as a means to break off the engagement. If it were to happen, the breakup should be due to my negligence.â
âCanât you break off the engagement if you donât love her?â
âIt is an engagement without love in the first place. The engagement wonât be broken simply over such an excuse.â
As if wanting the fact to be otherwise, Bioust smiled bitterly.
âThe Remote Duchy will never accept if the Imperial family were first to break off the engagement. The same goes for Elizabeth. Thus, I must have a good reason in order to break off the engagement.â
âThenâ¦â Layla looked at Bioust from top to bottom.
âShould I blind those sweet, golden eyes? If not, should I cut out an ear? I think it would be too inconvenient to cut off an arm⦠Maybe a leg? If it is too difficult to move about, would it be okay if I worked hard to help?â Layla pondered.
âIs there no other way?â
âWhatever I cut, it will be too painful for Bioust. Growing up as a precious prince, he would be unable to withstand pain⦠It would be better if he were to fall ill instead⦠Then again, if it were needed from me, I could easily cut off an arm or legâ¦â Layla frowned.
âWell, if I do have a flaw and it leads to Elizabeth proposing to break off the engagement, I would gladly accept it.â
âOh? What is the flaw?â Layla asked as her frown deepened.
âA flaw⦠Hmmâ¦â
For a short period, both Layla and Bioust were deep in thought as they tried to come up for a reasonable flaw. Although it was unintentional, it was Bioust who broke the silence.
âWhere and how should I sire an illegitimate childâ¦â Bioust spoke out loud to himself.
âWhat?â
âAh, pay no mind to it.â
âYou just said something.â
âI apologize. I was talking to myself.â
âSo, what did you say to yourself?â
âItâs not something an innocent lady should hear. I was just in a moment of desperation and inevitably spoke nonsense.â
âWhy are you saying that Iâm innocent?â Layla frowned.
âIn my opinion, he was the one who was more innocent. I mean⦠he is the kind of person to be ruthless and of the wilder side,â Layla thought to herself despite the fact that she has yet to experience much of the world.
âIâm a mature adult. I may have lived in the forest, but I know a lot.â
âWhat do you know?â
âI know everything except what I donât know,â Layla replied proudly.
âIn that case, I said âillegitimate childâ,â Bioust replied with a small sigh.
âIllegitimate child?â Layla tilted her head slightly. It was the first time she had heard the term.
ââ¦What is an âillegitimate childâ?â she asked.
âA child born out of wedlock is called an illegitimate child.â
âI remember this new phrase⦠Looks like it is a childâ¦â
âSo, I was wondering earlier that if I were to have an illegitimate child, Elizabeth may break off the engagement,â Bioust continued.
âWill she really give up on you if you do have an illegitimate child?â
âWell, it is possible. Elizabeth will not mind if the child was borned from royal concubines as an emperor is allowed to have one or two concubines. However, it will be a different situation altogether if I were to have an illegitimate child before even marrying Elizabeth. She will be more infuriated if the child were to be male with the rights of claiming the throne.â
âReally?â Layla asked and pondered for a moment.
âThen letâs have a baby.â
âPardon?â
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âLetâs have an illegitimate child,â Layla said as if it was nothing.
However, in truth, her heart was pounding, her legs were shaky, and she had sweaty hands. She was afraid that Bioust would refuse the gesture and not consider her fit for the role.