Chapter Fifteen

It was a few days before Tristan was allowed home, and I think everyone had been expecting me to calm down by then.

They were wrong.

As soon Edwin and Gregory helped him into the house, he agitatedly pulled off the bandages covering his ribs and groaned quietly as his eyes blackened and he finally healed himself. Hovering his unbroken hand over the cast on his other, the plaster cracked and fell off, and the bones in his arm slid back into place as well.

I watched all this from the landing as everyone else stood in the foyer, gathered around to welcome him home. He glanced around as he chatted to them, his eyes meeting mine for a moment before I turned and walked back up the stairs, not stopping until I got to my room, where I stood and pressed the heels of my palms to my eyes in annoyance. For all the anger coursing through my veins, I’d still felt a jolt along my spine when he’d looked at me.

Things continued like this for much of the following couple of weeks. I walked around the house as freely as I had before The Incident, as I was now calling it in my mind, but whenever Tristan entered a room I was in, I calmly got up and left. I’m not sure what I was trying to achieve, I wasn’t trying to be a brat, I just knew I couldn’t be in a space with him without throwing myself at him in either anger or lust.

Midway through the second week, I was sitting in the living room with Annabelle. She was doing yet another of her interminable puzzles and I was flicking through the TV channels aimlessly, when the door opened and I looked up to see Tristan walking in. He stopped when he saw me and we gazed at each other for a moment, until I broke the connection impassively and stood up to leave through the kitchen.

‘Cody!’ he called agitatedly, and I could hear him move to follow me. ‘Come on, you can’t just avoid me all summer.’ I kept walking, shoving my hands into my pockets so he wouldn’t see them shaking. ‘You’re being childish!’ he shouted after me as I jogged up the stairs towards the safety of my room.

Luckily he didn’t follow me any further and once again I found myself hiding in the attic for the rest of the day, just avoid another confrontation. It felt bitterly unfair, since I hadn’t done anything wrong. I’d saved his life, for god’s sake. I shouldn’t have to tiptoe around the place in fear of running into him.

This time, I decided firmly, it really was time to leave.

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‘I’m leaving,’ I said, looking at the dubious faces of Gregory and Edwin expressionlessly.

‘I don’t think that’s a good idea,’ Edwin said eventually, glancing at Gregory. They’d returned to their respective jobs the week before, so Gregory looked tired in a well-tailored suit and Edwin still hadn’t changed out of his white paint-splattered overalls. I’d ambushed them as soon as they’d walked through the front door and I think they both wished they’d had a cup of coffee before entering into this conversation.

‘No,’ I said firmly, refusing to get drawn into a debate. ‘I’ve done everything you’ve ever asked of me; I helped rescue Kaley, I basically saved everyone’s ass from Aldrich, and I even-... Well, you know what I did,’ I finished quietly, still uncomfortable with the idea of bringing up sex in front of them. ‘I’m sick of being here, I’m unhappy here, and I want to leave. I’m not asking. I’m just giving you notice.’

There was silence as Edwin glanced again at Gregory and the latter sighed, running a hand through his hair.

‘Okay,’ he said eventually. ‘I suppose if you feel that strongly about it there’s not really anything we can do. When were you thinking of leaving?’

‘This weekend,’ I stated. ‘I’ll fly out Saturday night.’

There was a pause, then Gregory shrugged and said, ‘Okay,’ sounding none too pleased with the situation.

As it was Thursday and they wanted to give me Friday to rest and pack, the Darlingtons took me out to dinner that night, a sort of goodbye meal that reflected the one we’d had when I arrived, aside from the atmosphere. Edwin and Gregory were being faux cheerful, acting like there was nothing unusual about this situation, while Annabelle was noticeably distressed. Maya and Kaley were wary and watchful, but still mostly focused on each other, while the electricity between Tristan and I fizzled and popped across the table, putting everyone on edge.

I focused on Annabelle.

Ordering a massive plate of creamy pasta, I talked to her non-stop, surprised by how much of her inner six-year-old came to the fore when she was upset.

You’re only talking to me to avoid Tristan, she projected after an hour or so of my never-ending speech.

I faltered. What?

It’s the only reason you’re even leaving, she continued, and even in my head I could hear she was upset.

Annabelle... I started carefully. I was always going to have to leave eventually.

You’re supposed to be here for another month, she argued stubbornly. I know your job wasn’t actually to look after me, but you’re still supposed to be my friend

I’ll always be your friend, I said gently. You can visit me whenever you want.

Annabelle shot me a devastatingly sceptical look. I’m six.

Right. Well. I’ll visit you then. I can stay in a hotel or something.

Do you promise you’ll visit?

I put my hand over my heart solemnly. ‘Promise.’

‘Promise what?’ Kaley asked, glancing between Annabelle and I curiously. It was obvious we’d been having a silent conversation, but nobody knew what about.

‘It’s a secret,’ Annabelle said smugly. ‘It’s just for me and Cody.’

Kaley smiled amusedly. ‘Okay then.’

And with that one dumb mistake I found myself bound to coming back at some point. Awesome.

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Later that night I was sitting on the edge of my bed agitatedly. It was eleven o’ clock and I was wired with nervous energy, but I knew Tristan was in the living room so I couldn’t go downstairs. Finally sighing I stood up and pulled my suitcase out from under my bed, propped it open on the mattress and glancing around dispassionately at my belongings. Half-heartedly, I pulled some t-shirts from the wardrobe and started rolling them and putting them in the case.

Ten minutes later there was a knock on my door, and it opened before I could say anything. When I looked up, Tristan was standing in the doorway, his dark gaze taking in what I was doing.

I stared at him as he calmly walked further into the room, looking around, before bringing his eyes back to me.

‘I miss you,’ he said simply, and I felt my whole body start to melt.

‘I haven’t gone anywhere yet,’ I muttered, busying my hands by rolling some more t-shirts.

‘You know what I mean,’ he said darkly. There was a pause then, ‘Are you flying into LAX or straight to Long Beach?’

‘St Tropez, actually,’ I said quietly. ‘I thought I’d go to my friends in France and see what I can salvage from this wreckage of a summer.’

There was another pause as he sat down on the bed beside my suitcase, making it more difficult to avoid looking at him.

‘You really want to go?’ he asked quietly.

‘I have to.’ I picked up another t-shirt.

‘Would you stay if I asked you to?’

I clenched my hands around the material. ‘You know I would,’ I muttered.

‘Then... Stay.

I dropped the t-shirt and turned to look at him angrily. ‘Why?’ I demanded.

Tristan blinked up at me dispassionately.

‘See?’ I said, grabbing at my clothes again and angrily stuffing them into the suitcase. ‘You still can’t say it. I’ll be gone in just over twenty-four hours, completely gone from your life, and you still can’t tell me how you feel.’

‘It’s better this way,’ he muttered.

‘Great,’ I said angrily.

‘Don’t you think I’ve ruined your life enough already?’

I scoffed and turned on him angrily. ‘The only thing you did to ruin my life,’ I said quietly, ‘was not saying it back.’

‘Cody,’ Tristan said seriously, ‘you’re wrong. I took the essence of you and destroyed it. I changed you completely.’

‘God, do you constantly spout bullshit?!’ I demanded, throwing down the shirt I’d been holding. ‘You’re hiding behind these stupid excuses that aren’t even true! I’m still me, but I get it, okay? You regret it, you regret having sex with me, you regret ever meeting me!’

‘That’s not true!’ Tristan argued, standing up now and letting his own anger shine through.

‘Sure it is. I came along and made your life complicated and you regret knowing me!’

‘I don’t regret knowing you!’

‘Yeah? Why not?’ I demanded angrily, shouting.

‘Because I love you!’ he shouted back, then growled quietly when he realised what he’d done.

‘Funny way of showing it,’ I snapped, even though my heart was racing.

‘You’re impossible,’ he snapped back.

‘Me?’ I demanded. ‘I’m impossible?! You are the most stubborn, antagonising, arrogant asshole-’

‘I’m stubborn?!’ he shouted incredulously. ‘You’re the most pig-headed, irritating, frustrating-’

‘Oh just shut up!’ I shouted, throwing myself at him and crashing my lips to his.

He grabbed my body and pulled me closer, kissing me angrily as we clashed, all teeth and lips and tongue.

He reached out and threw the suitcase to the floor, pushing me onto the bed and leaning over me as I tugged at his hair, making sure he couldn’t pull back.

He slid his hands under my shirt, running his fingers over my ribs and abs as I groaned against his mouth and kissed him harder. I pulled at his shirt in frustration, eventually letting my eyes black over and just ripping it off altogether before letting my hands wander freely across his body as fireworks popped behind my eyelids.

Soon we were naked and the room was filled with the sounds so gasping and moaning and kissing.

‘This might change things,’ Tristan breathed, as he settled between my legs.

‘This will change things,’ I said firmly, before he pushed in and speech became a problem.

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The rest of the Darlington clan squinted at us suspiciously.

‘So you’re... Staying?’ Maya asked flatly, frowning at me.

‘Yes,’ I said simply.

‘For how long?’ Kaley asked.

‘’Til the end of the summer.’

‘And... You guys are...?’

‘Together,’ we said simultaneously.

‘And this happened...?’

‘Last night.’

So,’ Edwin clarified, ‘in between making us all really uncomfortable at dinner with your animosity, and making us all really uncomfortable at breakfast with your togetherness, you made up?’

‘Actually, we just fought more,’ I informed him. ‘But it works for us.’

Edwin shook his head. ‘I feel like we should be discouraging this, but in theory we got exactly what we wanted,’ he said, looking at Gregory, who shrugged.

‘They’re not exactly conventional,’ he admitted, ‘but they have all that tension. It has to come out somehow.’

Tristan and I smirked at each other; I think we’d found an effective new way to work out our tension aside from arguing.