"Come on, let's get some coffee or something, boss. You're always so tired." Leroy nudges me as we both walk out of the office.
"Ach," I mumble in disagreement. I just wanted to go home or the bar.
Life has been a never-ending cycle of going to work then either going home or getting a drink alone.
Women hit on me regularly, but I always decline them as respectfully as possible. I'm tired and groggy.
Every day just feels like a chore, getting my work done in order to finally be alone again.
I want to blame it on her leaving, leaving me.
But I can't.
Last time, she left me for 4 years, and I was fine.
Fine I was thriving. I had a girlfriend, for God's sake. This time, I don't know what's wrong.
I'm over it.
Over looking for her, over waiting for her, and definitely over loving her.
But filling her gap wasn't an easy task. She was an enigma is what I've come to learn. One moment I thought I knew her, only to have her completely change on me.
She loved me, she said it herself. But it was her tendency of self-punishment that kept her away.
but other times they scare her, how much she hurts you in them...and she never wants to do something like that in real life Jasmine's words rang in my mind. She dreams of
me.
Even when she was asleep, I was on her mind, and that...that's enough to keep me satisfied.
I wonder if she still dreams of me. If her leaving New York meant leaving everyone behind, or if it was just her attempt of an escape.
"So, coffee?" Leroy pulls me out of my thoughts. I stay silent, which makes him whine like a child. "Come on, boss."
I nod and give in. It might be refreshing to spend some non-work-related time with him.
We both get in his car, driving to the nearest coffee place. Bean.
I peer through the glass door. "There're no empty seats from the looks of it," I
comment, watching the full tables of chatty lunches. "Let me just get it to go."
"Fine." Leroy crosses his arms, obviously wanting to sit down inside. "Get me an orange juice."
I raise my eyebrow.
"I don't like coffee." He shrugs.
I don't question it, knowing I'll only go down his nonsensical spiral.
I ordered a black coffee for myself and an orange juice for Leroy.
"The juice will take some time. We're squeezing a new batch of oranges," the barista says, and she hands me my coffee.
I nod, waiting and watching my once hot coffee cool down to a lukewarm liquid.
A small, squeaky scream makes me turn my head to the side to see a child running, laughing carefree as her younger brother chased her around the shop.
Before I had time to move out the way of their games, she crashes into my leg, making my hands spread out as a reflex and tilting my coffee cup, which had no lid.
When I look back down the child had already run off, and in front of me was a mass of curls and clothes drenched in black coffee.
I groan-I knew I shouldn't have agreed to coffee with Leroy.
I quickly voice an apology, cringing and hoping that this wouldn't become a bigger deal than it needed to be.
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The figure froze for a moment after my apology, turning around to face me, so slowly it was painful.
"Xavier."
I shut my eyes for a second, hoping my eyes weren't playing a prank on me.
"Miss Davis." I clear my throat, taking a moment to drink up her presence.
She didn't look much different, granted it had only been 4 months since I had seen her. Her bottle green eyes stood out more against her skin, which had gotten noticeably darker in the California sun.
Her eyebrows furrow as she stares at me intently, processing my presence as I was doing with her.
"You're still getting coffee all over yourself." I smirk at the cruel reminder this moment brought.
"You're still blaming me for it?" she murmurs back. She was amused even if she didn't show it.
"You shouldn't have been so close to me," I say. I know it's my fault, but the situation is hilariously sad.
"This isn't my fault!" she says, a little riled up. When I don't reply, the silence between us gets awkward before it's broken by her faint but audible laughter. "This can't be happening." She pinched the bridge of her nose.
"Can I at least buy you a coffee?" I offer, hoping it'll make up for her ruined clothes.
"You paid for this one," she comments, pulling out the gift card I had given to her on her wedding. I don't say anything.
A worker walks between us, mopping up the mess on the floor. She gives me a small smile, taking her coat off and tying her hair into a bun with the hair tie around her hand in efforts to cover up the coffee stains.
The barista hands me Leroy's orange juice and I manage to catch up with her as she's leaving.
"Hey, boss. What's taking soâ" Leroy approaches us both outside the entrance of the café. "Oh. She's here."
I turn to face Amelia, who's face stiffens for a moment before she adorns a friendly smile. "Leroy," she greets him.
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He mumbles a hello, probably just out of respect for his wife who was friends with her. Amelia starts walking in the opposite direction. Before I can control it, my voice calls out to her.
"I'll see you around, Mr King...I have a feeling I'm going to be in New York for a while,"
she says.
Her words seem to calm me down a little, hoping I'll see her again.
"You can't still be after her," Leroy deadpans, disappointed and slurping on his juice.
"I didn't even say anything," I say defensively.
"I've told you time and time again," he says as we walk back to wherever he had parked his car. "She's. Not. Good. For. You." He emphasizes each word.
"You wouldn't do the same thing as me if that was Jodie instead of Amelia?" I pause and ask.
He looks surprised that I would even make that comparison. "It's not the same. Jodie never hurt me." There's a certain pride in his voice when he says that.
"You're lucky she didn't, but you would still love her the same if she did, right?" I ask, but I already know the answer. "I'm not doing anything you wouldn't do, Leroy." "You're being an idiot," he scoffs, trying to lighten the conversation a little with his jokey tone.
"Maybe I am."
I'm being an idiot. I know I am. But there's that tiny ray of hope, and it's enough to keep me going-for now, at least.
"Boss." He puts a friendly hand on my shoulder. "There's a difference between love and self-sabotage."
I stay frozen as he walks around to the driver seat of his car, I never expected something that makes sense, let alone be so mature, to come out of Leroy's mouth.
As soon as I locked eyes with her everything hit me all over again, twice as hard. Those
few months I had managed to suppress my feelings was all erased.
The only way to make this worth it was when I could finally call her mine again.