Chapter 25: Chapter 25

I spent the following morning pacing from one room to another like a caged tiger. The conversation in the afternoon left me restless; it gnawed at me like a shadow that wouldn’t go away. No matter how much the Cullens tried to distract me and help me, it felt as if I were trapped in a whirlpool with no way out. I tried to occupy myself with a book, but the words blurred before my eyes like ink in water. After reading a page for the sixth time, I gave up in frustration.

In a desperate attempt to organize my thoughts, I turned to baking. But even here, the results were disheartening: I forgot the ingredients and missed the timer that was supposed to signal the perfect moment. Thank goodness Esme had a watchful eye on the situation and saved the kitchen by turning off the oven just in time.

When it finally became 2:30 PM, I made my way to the border with trembling hands. Just like with the conversation with Paul, I was uncertain about what to expect. Still, it reassured me that Sam had followed my wish to talk with me even after his conversation with Paul.

When I reached the border, Sam was already there, a familiar presence in this charged atmosphere. Behind him, I recognized a wolf—Leah. Her gaze was fixed on me, and I felt the tension in her posture. She was ready to intervene at any moment should I dare to come too close to Sam. I kept my distance; the warning was clear and unmistakable.

“I don’t know what you’re trying to accomplish. We’re far enough away from people, and we know what you are now,” Sam began the conversation bluntly. His voice was firm, and I felt as if I were under an interrogation light. Confused, I looked at him, my thoughts swirling. I wanted to go home, back to my family, back to the life I had known. It was as if I had missed an important point.

“I want to see my family. I want to go home,” I replied hesitantly, unsure of what Sam wanted to hear. At that moment, I heard a contemptuous snort from Leah that sliced through the silence like a sharp arrow. Sam’s hand began to tremble slightly, and I instinctively took a step back.

“You won’t be seeing your family for now,” he spat out the sentence as if it were a bitter taste on his tongue. “And contact lenses won’t change anything.” Contact lenses? Was he implying that my eyes weren’t red? The absurdity of the thought made me pause for a moment.

“This is all a big misunderstanding. Something went wrong during the transformation and…,” I started, but Sam sharply cut me off. The tremor in his hand grew stronger, and with each heartbeat, my nervousness escalated immensely.

“Misunderstanding?” His voice sounded sharp and crackling, as if every word were cutting through the air like an invisible blade. “What is there to misunderstand about turning into a vampire?”

“My transformation was shorter than planned. I don’t have red eyes, and I can still eat normal food, but I also need a small amount of blood. I sleep. I am slower than a vampire but faster than a human. I don’t want to betray you; it’s just how I am right now.” I rattled off the facts as tears welled in my eyes, blurring my vision. The last sentence slipped out in a whisper, as if I were trapped in a desperate prayer.

I don't know exactly what happened next. A crack pierced the tense silence, and as I tried to open my tear-filled eyes, I could only see blurred shadows. Reflexively, I took a step back, but then I felt a sharp pain in my left hand. The ground rushed up to meet me, and I fell into the soft moss and leaves of the forest, which cushioned my fall somewhat.

Confused, I wiped the tears from my eyes and looked at my hand. As soon as I saw the bloody grooves, I felt the pain burning inside me like a raging fire. But there was no time to focus on it. In front of me, the two wolves—Sam and Leah—were engaged in a heated argument that I couldn’t understand. Minutes passed as I improvised a bandage with my shirt while trying to grasp the situation.

For a moment, I considered returning to the Cullens' house. But the thought of being chased by the wolves quickly made me dismiss that idea. I was no match for their speed. I sat up and backed away until I felt the rough bark of a tree against my back. There, I lingered, waiting for the two wolves to finish their discussion.

Another moment passed before they both disappeared into the woods and soon returned, looking a bit disheveled. Unexpectedly, it was Leah who approached me first. Her expression was no longer annoyed as it had been in our previous encounters. Instead, her gaze seemed almost gentle as she stepped closer and knelt down in front of me.

I flinched, like a wounded animal caught in a trap. And if you looked closely, that’s exactly what I was. Leah unwrapped my makeshift bandage and inspected the wound, which had stopped bleeding. It was as if my injury was already several hours old. Leah growled, and I flinched again. I was about to apologize, even though I didn’t quite know why, when I noticed that she had growled at Sam, who had stepped closer.

“You’ve caused enough trouble, Sam,” her voice was cutting and cold, like the wind whistling through the trees. She rewrapped my arm with my shirt and helped me to my feet.

“She’s bleeding! She hardly smells like a bloodsucker. She doesn’t have red eyes. You can’t ignore these signs, Sam.” Leah’s voice was a sharp note against the oppressive silence of the forest, and her hand rested firmly but gently on my healthy arm. She trembled slightly, and I couldn’t tell if she was trying to calm me or herself. Her eyes, usually so full of anger and disdain, now shimmered with an unexpected light—a mix of concern and determination. I felt like a pawn between the two, and my heart raced as if it were struggling to find a way out of my chest.

“She’s a danger to La Push,” Sam explained, his voice sounding firm and unyielding, as if he were a judge passing sentence without considering the circumstances. His words cut through the air like a sharp knife.

“YOU DON’T KNOW THAT!” Leah shouted at him, her voice echoing through the trees and startling the birds. I was taken aback by the intensity of her anger, by the passion with which she stood up for me. Since when was Leah on my side? We weren’t really friends; we had exchanged barely more than fleeting words, and yet now she was ready to stand against Sam as if I were a precious treasure she needed to defend.

“It’s not her fault, Sam! She was ripped from her life. She’s lost everything she ever knew,” Leah continued, and I felt the chasm between me and the wolf in front of me begin to close. Her words were like a gentle wind that set the rigid branches of a tree in motion.

In that moment, I realized that Leah was fighting not just for me, but also for herself. I watched as the emotions in Sam changed; the expression in his eyes fluctuated between determination, sorrow, and a hint of uncertainty. It was as if he were wrestling with himself, chasing a truth that was slipping away from him.

“Leah, you know it’s not that simple,” Sam finally replied, his voice quieter, but the tension was still palpable. “There are rules, and we have to follow them. You should know that.”

“And what about the rules of humanity?” Leah countered, and I felt a spark of hope ignite within me. “She’s at least as much human as we are. Maybe she’s not a whole human anymore, but we aren’t either.”

I dared not take a breath as I glanced between them. The air was electrically charged, and I could feel the hissing of unspoken words between them. Sam closed his eyes for a moment, and I wondered if he was considering the possibility that I wasn’t the threat he believed me to be.

“I can’t risk her becoming a danger. Not to us and not to the people here,” Sam murmured finally, and I felt my heart break once more. The disappointment was like a cold shadow that settled over me. Was I really that dangerous? Was I truly the enemy they saw in me?

I lowered my gaze, unable to bear the intense looks from both of them. Inside me, a storm of confusion and sadness raged. I wasn’t here to fight, to sow enmity. I just wanted peace, a sense of normalcy, and to return to my old life.

“I… I don’t want to hurt anyone,” I finally mumbled, my voice barely more than a whisper, but it was enough to draw the attention of both. “I just want… I just want to live in peace with my family. Please.”

“Think about Paul too,” Leah added, and I felt my heart race at the thought of my wolf so far away. “What if you were separated from Emily? What if you could never see her again? All because of a decision none of you made.”

Sam looked thoughtful, as if weighing the words hanging in the air. His face was marked by an expression of inner turmoil, and I could see him grappling with the different possibilities before him. The decision lay with him, and I held my breath as I waited for his response.