when soap is not soap. . .

I remember when I used to be confused of how I cannot hold the soap properly. How it always slipped away from my little hands. How it always slide through my skin causing it to fall and drop.

That fallen soap looked so dirty and misshapen. I don't like how it carries all the dirt after being dropped. And then I would always wash it off with running water. That running water sheds off the visible dirt, however, the soap remains misshapen with its size becoming so little.

All of it cannot be undone. And so I ponder with all the decisions I made. What if I just hold it properly so it won't drop and fall? What if I've just been careful with the soap so it wouldn't be misshapen? What if I could've just catch it before the soap went damaged?

But then I would always come to a realization. If I kept pondering on how I could have watched my actions to avoid damage, I would miss seeing the soap gradually become so small that it gently washes away.

This is to say that the past remains the past, unchangeable and fixed. Our mistakes, too, will be washed away. Now we can laugh, having accepted our journey and processed our experiences. We've grown, and soon you'll realize, 'oh I can handle a big bar of soap.'

-xysaoirse-