I have arrived at Khun Sam's house and I have told my mother so that you do not worry about me. But they still don't know that I slept over at my first girlfriend's house the first night.
Why do I feel guilty?
- What's happening? You are very quiet.
he asked as he drank juice in the fridge.
I jumped when I heard Khun Sam, who is now my girlfriend, ask me.
When our relationship has changed, everything seems different.
- I'm not thinking of anything.
- Let's go up.
- Yeah?
- Take a shower before going to bed.
I said it slowly. I'm so clumsy and shy.
Does she have the
intention to sleep and hold me all night
Actually? It's only 6 o'clock.
Too early to sleep.
When he sees that I haven't moved.
She comes to me and pulls my hand.
- Come on.
When we're in the bedroom, Khun Sam releases me and goes to shower as usual and I follow her. I have already
Said before, there are a lot of my clothes in her closet. Your house is already like my second home.
-Ahhhh!
- Why do you have to be surprised?
I walk out of the bathroom and confront Khun Sam in front of me at the door. She is leaning against the towel rail with her head bowed.
- Why are you standing here?
- Wait, why are you taking too much shower?
- I take my time to shower as usual.
- No. Sorry, it's too long. I smile because she is waiting.
- I'm just taking a shower, do you miss me?
- Why so quiet?
- I'm thinking, what should I answer? Because my answer will confuse you.
I laugh with satisfaction. It's so nice to see that she is trying to communicate with me. Sometimes it's so sad.
When he told me he liked me, I understood that he hated me.
But when he told me he hated me, I felt hurt.
It will be difficult for her.
- Let's have a deal, okay?
- Me?
- Now, we are in a relationship. I want to have more privileges than others.
- That?
- Now, if you have something, you have to tell me directly without hiding or being oblique, just say it.
She's pretty confused about our deal,
but it is not difficult. However, I have waited so long for your answer, so I have to push.
- Just say it directly, will you?
- It's not very hard.
- Well, I promise you, if you want something, just tell me you want it.
and I will do it for you.
- All?. Probably, she has something in mind.
- If you agree.
- Well.
- Then we should go to bed now.
I look at the clock on the wall. It's only 7:30 pm Why do you want to sleep so bad? I don't know what to do.
Are you being shy? Or just sleepy.
Today I feel as if the bed I have slept in before is not the same. But I try to do it as always lying under the blanket. Khun Sam does the same. We don't know what pose he sleeps in. We should lie on our backs or we should lie on our sides facing each other.
Just sleeping. I do not know what to think!
- Wow, your roof is so pretty.
- First, I will paint it with a gray color. But finally, white is the mesor.
I don't know what to say. So he asked me about the roof. And I feel a little uncomfortable afterwards. Hey,
- mon
- Yeah,
- Is the ceiling smaller than me? Why do you keep looking at the ceiling?
- I honestly confess to you, I don't know what to do. Should I face you or turn my back?
- Do what you want?
-...
When I have permission to do so. I move to lie on my side with my back to her. Khun Sam says something
grumpy
- What you want is to turn your back on me?
- I can't look at you.
- Because?
- I'm embarrassed, today you made my heart skip a beat all day and I can't believe you're my girlfriend, and
I'm your girlfriend.
- Can I hug you?
I nod though I dare not
I want my voice to come out, I feel his face around my neck and then he speaks.
- Not only are you uncomfortable, but I also keep wondering. I am dreaming?
-Khun Sam...
- The last few days, you were mad at me.
- I was so disappointed in you. There was not
prepared to face the fact that Khun Sam,
who had been good to me, became a
bad. I didn't know why you changed. I had no idea you did it because of me.
I'm so sorry I didn't tell you the truth.
- So that's why I asked you for an agreement to be honest with me
- Of course.
- You promised me.
- um.
I can feel every breath around my neck, even in my ears. It's like a kitten is smelling me.
She closed her eyes without thinking about the embarrassment, but she let it go.
continue.
But I want to know. What are you doing? This is the first trial to test our agreement.
- What are you doing, Khun Sam?
- What what?. Everything suddenly stops as if someone paused. Khun Sam, whose lips are touching the back of my neck, stops and lies on his stomach as if nothing happened.
- Any.
- You will see? You just told me you'd be honest with me.
- Just hold you while you sleep.
"Yes. He told her briefly." - If what you want is just hold me, I'll let you hold me... just hold me.
- Hugs only?
- Just say it directly, whatever you want.
- I didn't want to do anything else. Yawn - I'm so sleepy.
When he finishes, he immediately turns his back on me.
- Good night.
- Have a good night
Even she promised me that she would be honest with me, she didn't. And I don't know if it's because of anger or because I got up early, so I haven't fallen asleep. I don't know what time it is now I just want to get up to walk or do something to calm down when I get out of bed. She talks.
- Where are you going?
She said it clearly, proof that she faked falling asleep
- I'll drink some water and watch TV for a while.
- Well, I'll go with you.
- Didn't you say you wanted to sleep?
- I'm awake.
- YEAH.
- It seems you're mad at me.
- I'm not. I responded shortly before basing the stairs. Khun Sam follows me and turns on the TV to
Make noise.
- Let's sit together. even though i'm so
grumpy now I want to be with her.
- What program?
- Any.
She has the remote to find the tv show and she keeps asking for my idea but I answer silently. Can't you see I'm in a bad mood?
Please, are you interested in me or are you asking me how I feel?
One more time
- Don't have a favorite show?
- Ican see everything.
- So, let's watch a documentary.
Everything I've seen now is about animals. We navigate a world of animals and observe activities.
of animals.
- Look, you're not being honest with me. So why are you asking me to be honest with you? It's not fair.
I say it, then look at her offended.
- It's not a big deal.
- See, you're lying to me.
I'm sighing. She's trying to push me all over.
-Okay, I was. I agree. Frankly. Now is your turn.
- What do you want to know about me?
- A moment ago, in bed, what were you doing?
- I only ask you to show that you are sincere with me.
- I hugged you.
- Only a hug?
- Well, if you don't want to tell me, I'll assume it never happened and it won't.
- Something... Do I have to say it? Put it into words? is...
- I just want to know that you will tell me honestly. I want to be your exception, but you can't.
We are silent and we act as if we were
watching TV. In the documentary you can see the scene of how lions reproduce. male and female lions, both lick each other and ride. khun sam and i stand still with our hearts racing.
- IS...
He points to the television in an uncertain voice.
- That?
- I want to do that with you.
I'm looking at her, and my face is hot. Khun Sam, who pointed to the TV, she is looking at me.
hitting...
My heart is bouncing out of my chest, Finally,
- Well, if you don't want to tell me, I'll assume it never happened and it won't.
- Something... Do I have to say it? Put it into words? is...
- I just want to know that you will tell me honestly. I want to be your exception, but you can't.
We are silent and we act as if we were
watching TV. In the documentary you can see the
scene of how lions reproduce. male lions and
the females both lick each other and ride. khun sam and i stand still with our hearts racing.
she tells me honestly and when she did, I'm the one she's so embarrassed and uncomfortable with.
-Khun Sam...
- Do you want to lick my