Chapter 0201 âThank youâ I say We get back to work and eventually finish cooking. They both help me set the table and we sit down to eat..
With the three of us, or should I say four, we almost clean everything, but I put my foot down for some left overs. Calvin was probably going to come home tired and hungry. He wonât have time to cook something.
After dinner, I make them shower and then it is off to bed for them.
It was after they were asleep that the idea came to me. I had a five bedroom house. There was still an extra room even after turning one of them into a nursery. The last remaining bedroom could be Gunnerâs room.
He could sleep there anytime he was over and it could also be his safe space while he was here. I quickly get excited about the idea. Immediately I take a note pad and started scribbling down what I would need.
Iâll have to ask Calvin for permission, but I was sure heâd agree. Well I hoped he would. Plus heâll be helpful when it comes to the design of the room. He knows Gunner better than anyone. Heâll know what he likes.
I was just finishing up the list of essentials when the doorbell rang. I wiggle up and go to open it, pretty sure that it will Calvin on the door. I wasnât wrong âHiâ I tell him.
âHi to you tooâ he says, giving me a tired smile.
I step aside and he comes in. We move to the living room.
âItâs quiet. Are they asleep?â he asks âYesâ
I didnât know what to say. I had so many question, but I was afraid of stepping out of boundary.
âAbout today? Gunner was crying because of his motherâ I start slowly.
The moment I say those words, his face turns stone cold.
Donât mention that bitch to me again! She has done nothing, but hurt me and my son over and over again. What kind of woman abandons her son? I get and understand that she doesnât love me and she never will, it hurts, but I learned to accept that.
Turning her back on Gunner is something else. I will never Unrequited love. Wasnât it just a bitch? Iâve suffered through it since I first fell for Rowan. I didnât want my friend to go through it, but it looks like he has.
âEvery time i call and she refuses to come see Gunner kills me. He is amazing, yet his mother wants nothing to do with him. I tried hiding it from him, but as he got older he started to understand things. He started to understand that his mother doesnât want him and she wants nothing to do with him. Fuck I hate her so much, but I also canât stop loving herâ he says before continuing. Pain radiating from his eyes.
âI want to give Gunner the world, but the one thing he wants is totally out of my reach. I regret ever falling in love with her. Regret ever meeting her. But the thing is, regretting her means regretting Gunner and that is one thing I can never doâ
Where have I heard those words from? Yeah from my own l*ps. Didnât I tell Rowan the same thing? That as much as I want to regret him, I canât because it means regretting Noah.
âI donât have the right words for you. Hell. Our situations are the same, but different at the same time. All I can tell you is; be there for Gunner as best as you can. Love him so much that he doesnât miss the love of his mother. Show him that he is enough and that itâs his motherâs loss not hisâ
Those are the only words I can offer. I wanted to say more, but I didnât have the words to comfort him. He nods his head and we stay in silence.
âThank you, Ava. For being there for me and my sonâ he says after a while.
âYouâre welcomeâ
After, he leaves carring Gunnerâs sleeping form and the food I saved for h Hours after he leaves. Hours after I go to bed. Gunnerâs smile still haunts my mind. His smile and his mysterious mother invade my every thought.
There was something I was missing. If only I could piece the pieces together then maybe I could figure I out why this whole issue bothers me so F***ing much. Maybe I can figure out why my mind wonât give me piece concerning the matter.
Evelyn M.M