"You know you really made me hate myself, had to stop before I break myself."
~ Omar Apollo, Evergreen
Loud banging from her front door had Sophie nearly flying out of bed. She groaned and rolled to her side to check the time. 7:00 am. Whoever it was must have something really important to disturb her sleep.
She threw on a robe, shoved her dresser she used to barricade herself in her room with aside, marched down the stairs, and yanked the door open with a huff. To her surprise, no one was there. Who ding dong ditches anymore, especially way out in no man's land where she lives?
Before she could slam the door shut, her gaze dropped to her front porch steps. In a pile was an envelope, a package, another package, and multiple boxes. "What the..." she drawled and crouched beside them to take a closer look. There was no address on any of it, not even her own name and address.
She turned to stand to get a knife to open the boxes, and nearly screamed at the giant man looming in her doorway. With a yelp, she lost her balance, and fell back onto her butt.
In her sleepy and grumpy daze to answer the door, she forgot Cillian was even here. As usual, he just stood there, waiting. Waiting for what? She still wasn't sure.
Not wanting to be vulnerable to him, she clambered to her feet and rushed past the brooding man to get back inside. She quickly ran back upstairs and changed into something more appropriate, a cozy sweatshirt and leggings, and jogged back down the stairs.
When she got back downstairs, Cillian of course was standing in the middle of the living room like he usually did. This time, with the boxes and packages at his feet.
"Oh," she mumbled, surprised he brought them in for her. "Thank you."
She knelt in front of the boxes, trying not to freak out how close they were for now, and focused on the packages. She opened the small package first, her jaw dropping at what she found. "A new iPhone?" She exasperated.
She set that aside and opened the next package. In it was wads and wads of money. "Oh my gosh..." she drawled, like she couldn't believe her eyes. There had to be hundreds of thousands of dollars in here.
It dawned on her then, this was all from ol' General Hoppers.
She tore open the envelope next and her stomach dropped. It was a copy of the contract she signed. When she first signed it, she didn't have the time, nor the right head space to read it. She had no idea everything she agreed to. Too scared to read it now, she set it aside.
Lastly, she opened the big boxes. In it, tons and tons of frozen raw meat. Not normal grocery store meat, but deer legs, chicken feet, cow ribs, and more.
Incredulously, she blinked at Cillian. "I'm gonna need to buy a bigger freezer."
Last night she briefly skimmed through the booklet and learned raw meat was very important to a lycanthrope's diet. While they can eat other food, meat needs to be prioritized in their diet.
Still, a few minutes later, she was plating pancakes for him. "Here's yours."
His eyes widened as he inspected the food further. It was hot, he realized, by the steam coming off of it. His head titled. His food was always cold and more... bloody. This... food was circular, tan, and appeared to be soft. Next to his plate was a bottle with brown liquid- syrup, it read.
Noticing his confusion, she prepped her own pancakes, dumped an ungodly amount of the syrup on them, and dug in. He did the same with the syrup, but didn't eat. Instead, he took his plate and headed towards the stairs.
"Where are you going'?" She asked, mid bite. "We eat in the kitchen."
That didn't quite make a lot of sense to him. He was always ordered to eat in his cell. He seemed to process that a moment before he lowered himself to the ground, his plate in his lap. He saw how Sophie picked the food up with the fork and put it in her mouth. The fork felt foreign in his hand, but he did his best to mimic what she did.
"What are you doing?" She asked before he took a bite. "Why are you on the floor?"
Panic seized his chest, but you'd never know by looking at him. His expression always remained passive despite his constant state of anxiety.
"We're supposed to eat up here."
He had never been allowed to before. Not wanting to face the consequences of giving into her lies, he remained seated on the floor.
She sighed, not in irritation towards him, but rather herself. She had to start being more clear. "At the table." She told him, softly. "Like I am."
His brows furrowed at the suggestion, not brave enough to ask why she'd tell him to do such a thing. He remained where he was on the floor and used the fork to stab the pancake like he saw Sophie do and popped it into his mouth. It tasted different then he was used to. Really different. He liked it enough to continue eating it, but decided he preferred his other food.
"You're not going to sit at the table?" She questioned.
He ignored her. Not out of rudeness, but because he simply couldn't bring himself to speak.
Though she continued to push him, he was adamant to eat his meal on the floor, no matter how much she tried to coax, convince, compromise, or bribe. Nothing would persuade him to sit on a chair.
With a sigh, Sophie dug into her own pancakes. She unlocked her new phone screen and opened an app. Did you know Amazon sold freezers? Sophie didn't know that either until just now. Thanks to all the money, she was able to order a huge freezer and get it delivered to her house all in the same day. Along with it, she ordered clothes and some necessities for Cillian as well.
Once again, there was pounding at the door. Cillian stood, alert and ready. Meanwhile, Sophie groaned and stomped to the door. "Now what?" She grumbled complaints under her breath the whole way, probably thinking he couldn't hear it. Thanks to his advanced hearing, he heard everything she grumbled, including something about it still only being the, "butt crack of dawn."
Before she could even open the door, it was ripped open, and the uninvited house guest shoved their way in.
"Darcy!" Sophie squeaked in surprise, making Cillian relax slightly since she knew who the intruder was. "What are you doing here?"
"What am I doing here?" The other woman snapped, pacing the living room. She didn't even bother taking off her snow covered boots, tracking the mud and snow into the house. She was so pissed at Sophie, she decided she deserved the mess. "More like what are you still doing here?"
She opened her mouth, but then snapped it shut at the realization. She missed work yesterday and forgot about going in today at 8:00 a.m. She should have been on her way already. "Listen, I know you're mad, but you can't be here right now." Sophie tried to convince her.
General Hoppers said that Cillian wouldn't hurt her. She wasn't sure what that meant for everyone else. Unfortunately, Darcy completely ignored her friend.
"I went into work yesterday without unlocking the door to get in!" Darcy exclaimed, her pacing continuing. "I thought, hmm. Weird. Sophie never forgets to lock the door, but I gave you the benefit of the doubt. Then, I slipped and fell flat on my back because I slid in a piss puddle! And I thought, hmm weird! Sophie never forgets to clean the floor before closing up for the night. And THEN you don't show up for work! Still, I gave you the benefit of the doubt! I called you, I texted you, for Pete's sake Sophia, I emailed you! No. Response." She ranted, close to burning a hole in her friend's floor from the pacing.
"I thought something happened to you! I thought you were kidnapped or dead! When I saw your truck in the driveway, I still gave you the benefit of the doubt, when clearly, the doubt has benefitted." Darcy cut herself off at the sight of the brooding man at the opposite side of the living room. She was too busy with her rant and pacing, she initially didn't even see him. "Who are you!?"
She whipped around to face Sophie for an explanation. With a wince and an awkward chuckle, she murmured, "Umm, I can explain..."
Darcy was having none of it and started to march up to the man himself. "Maybe he can tell me where you've been-"
"Darcy, wait!" Sophie exclaimed and grabbed her friend by the arm. "You're freaking him out, chill!"
Just the few steps she took was enough to make Cillian nearly plaster himself against the wall to get away. Thankfully, Sophie distracted her enough so she wouldn't notice. She was just relieved his fight or flight response seemed to be more flight. Well, at least with women so far. General Hoppers getting launched across the room the other day didn't seem to be much of a "flight" response.
Darcy scoffed and shrugged her off. "Please, he's a big boy. He can handle himself."
"Darcy, he's a veteran with severe PTSD." Sophie argued, which wasn't a total lie. "Babe, please go upstairs. I'll be up in a minute." She strongly suggested. It felt odd using the pet name, but she signed a contract to sell this relationship.
Hesitantly, he did as asked.
Darcy let out a long, dramatic gasp. "Baaaabe!?" She exasperated. "Is he your boyfriend?"
"About that..."
"Does he live here too?"
"Well, umm... yeah, he does."
She pointed a finger accusingly at Sophie. "You said you'd never live with a boyfriend. You'd only live with a man after you were married."
Sophie bit her lip and slowly nodded, making her friend's face drop.
"You're joking..."
Sophie sighed and shook her head. "He's my husband, but please, I can explain! It was a quick decision, just so last minute. We had to get married for his... his military benefits so wherever he went, I could go too." She decided on the lie.
"And when was this?"
She winced and awkwardly played with her fingers. "Yesterday?"
Her jaw dropped. "You got married yesterday and didn't tell me!?"
"Darcy, please!" She pleaded with her friend. "I didn't have a wedding, all we did was say our vows and sign the marriage contract. He just got home last night." What she was saying still wasn't a total lie.
"What does 'go where he goes' mean?" Darcy snapped, arms crossed defensively over her chest. "We have a business to run, Sophie."
She faltered. "I, umm... I'm sorry."
Darcy rose a brow. "I'm sorry? I'm sorry? What is that supposed to mean?"
"I can't do this anymore." She quietly admitted. "I can't run the company with you."
Her jaw dropped. "You're just going to tell me now that you're giving up on the business?"
"I'm not giving up, I just..." Sophie drawled, desperately trying to think of a lie. "I'm sorry, but I wasn't able to tell you about him because... because as I said, he's in the army and has a super secret job, which means a pretty secret life. He's home for at least the next six months, but I need to be home to help him. What he saw overseas really screwed him up."
Darcy flailed her arms and exclaimed, "what, so you're just not going to work for half a year? You have a money tree in the backyard I don't know about?"
"We have the money, his... his higher ups take care of us." She explained the best she could.
Darcy's face fell, her shoulders dropping as the reality of the situation sunk in. She remained quiet for a moment, processing. It felt as if her whole world had been flipped upside down. Not only did her best friend lie to her, but now she was left to run a business on her own.
"Do your parents even know?" She whispered, defeated.
Her eyes widened. "No, they don't. Please don't tell them yet."
Darcy scoffed and started to back away to the door. "Of course they don't. How can I trust you after this?"
Tears of frustration gathered in Sophie's eyes. "Please, you have to understand I had no choice."
"We always have a choice, Sophie." She whispered, harshly, her hand on the doorknob. "Especially when our choices effect those around us."
Boy, did she know that to be the truth. Tears fell down her cheeks and she wiped her tears with her sleeves. "Please, I'm so sorry."
With one last glance, she muttered, "me too, Sophie." The door closed behind her and she was gone.
Sophie's body dropped to the couch, utterly defeated. With her hands over her face, she struggled to process the past couple days. What in the world was she doing?
Her life, her loved ones lives, and her "mate's" life were all in her hands. While she didn't care as much for the latter, she still couldn't have it on her conscious that she was the reason for his death. He'd done nothing after since the first night they met to show he meant any harm, but that didn't mean he wasn't capable of it. He was more than capable of it. Yet something in the back of her head told her he'd never hurt her. Maybe all the cheesy werewolf books she read growing up were true about the stupid mate bond.
Nevertheless, he was a trained weapon, and a natural born predator on top of that. Oh, and he had PTSD. She had a mentally unstable veteran werewolf/potentially explosive military equipment for a mate.
On top of that, she was letting down her loved ones. Unbeknownst to them, she saved their lives. In doing so, she was betraying them all at the same time.
Sophie always told Darcy everything. She knew about every bad date she's ever been on, she knew her life story, she even knew about every little inconvenience in her life. Of course she'd tell Darcy if she got married and especially if she decided to give up the business! In fact, she'd tell her way in advance. But because of this, it was like she dropped two massive bombs in Darcy's life, all while saving her life.
Even her parents and brother knows everything about her life. Sophie lived quite a few hours from her childhood home now, and quite a few hours from her brother in NYC, but they talked daily. She could never keep something like getting married a secret. They'd be livid with her. Then to keep the threat upon their lives and the fact that her husband is a werewolf a secret?
All at once, the events of the past couple days caught up to Sophie. Hot tears pricked the back of her eyes and spilled down her cheeks. She sniffled and turned to lay on her side to get comfy while she wallowed in self pity, to find Cillian standing in his usual spot in the middle of the living room. "Geez, I have to get you a bell." She huffed as she sat up.
Frustrated, she grumbled, "you can sit down, you know. You're always standing, just sit down."
The moment "just sit down," got out of her mouth, he sat on the floor. She blinked, not believing what she was seeing. "I meant on the couch...."
He didn't look very sure of that and remained on the floor. She wiped the remaining tears on her face with the ends of her sleeve, studying the lycanthrope sitting on her floor. He never looked at her. He always stood, waiting for something. He didn't do much unless she said to, not suggested to.
Then, it clicked. He's constantly waiting for commands.
"Sit on the couch please, Cillian." She mumbled, tired.
He sat there, conflicted.
"Fine, sit on the floor. I don't care." She said, shortly.
However, the longer they sat in silence, her brain was anything but. Eventually, she felt guilty for getting angry at him. Then she was irritated that she felt guilty. He caused this whole mess, he was the one to blame. Nonetheless, he was also a victim of General Hoppers and God knows who else in the US Army.
She flopped back down onto the couch, sprawled across it, all defensives off. She pinched the bridge of her nose and whispered, "sorry, I don't want to be mean, even though I am rather mad at you..." her head lolled to the side to gaze at him, studying him.
After a beat, she whispered, "why did you do this to me?"
But of course, there was no response.
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Next chapter is alllll Cillian and Sophie! Pretty much every chapter from now on will be more focused on them. Can't wait for y'all to read it!
Question of the chapter: pancakes or waffles?
Also, anyone else that's reading this with black pages, did the picture look kind of 3D to you too?
Thank you for 850 reads!!