Angels At My Table

I was so jumpity and mad at the Mage Guild that I didn’t even get to enjoy Lilsa’s deep and attractive cleavage as she plunked our pies down and calmly set our table with appropriate cutlery.

By that, we got a spoon, a fork of dented copper, and a little chipped bowl of tomato sauce.

I wasn’t about to complain, and the girls didn’t seem to mind.

I was still scowling when Lilsa returned a few moments later with our drinks.

“Thank you, Lilsa,” I said, blinking myself out of my little temper and lifting the little glass to my lips. “Could you please get me another? I’ve had some frightfully distressing news and may need to calm down a little before eating. It’s not healthy to digest a meal when feeling moody and irritated.”

“Of course, Taran,” she said, her smile never wavering. “I’ll bring another shortly.”

I took a big gulp and shook my head at my three new companions. “It’s ridiculous,” I told them. “Absolutely ridiculous. I’ve never heard anything so outrageous. I feel like going all the way to the emperor and putting my foot down really hard until he does something about it.”

“But we can’t stay with you,” the tall one said, her voice stammering.

“Why not?”

“Because we… we just…” She looked to the other two for assistance, but they stared back at her. “We just can’t, that’s all.”

The middle girl nodded along. “We don’t want to cause trouble,” she said.

“Cause trouble?” I drained the last of my gin and tonic. “Impossible. Ladies don’t cause trouble. It’s just not a thing they can do. That’s not to say there aren’t burdens and obligations, but these are to be endured. No, as a gentleman, I resolve here and now not to let this travesty stand. You may lodge in my tower and I shall approach the Mage Guild tomorrow and sort it all out. Harassing young female students? Bah! Bah, I say. Void portals for the lot of them.”

I felt a slight pressure as the Old Twit perked up at that.

“No no no,” the tall girl reached out to pluck at my sleeve. “Please don’t! We really don’t want to cause you any trouble. They’ll harass you, too, if you do!”

Moved by her care, I gave her hand a gentle pat.

Oh, her skin was so soft! So smooth.

My heart did a little dance in my chest as I tried not to let my weakness for her show on my face.

“That’s very kind of you…” I paused, remembering something important. “You know, I don’t even know your names.”

“I’m Clover,” the middle girl said, reaching up and dropping her hood. “Please forgive my sisters. We’ve had a disappointing and stressful first few weeks in Waggenrook.”

As the hood fell away to reveal her face, I felt my blood drain completely from my own as it raced south.

She was… gorgeous! Soft bubblegum pink hair melted down to frame a face I would gladly go to war with the empire over. Again. Her lips stretched into a smile which threw dimples at me like daggers to my heart.

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And her cheeks!

They were so plump.

Like little chestnuts beneath skin so silk and smooth. My fingers twitched, wanting desperately to pinch them both!

She was…

“Cute,” I breathed, causing those cheeks to explode with bright red blush.

The tallest girl snapped her fingers in front of my face, but I couldn’t stop staring at Clover’s perfect face. I know it was very rude of me, but I can’t tell you just how affected my heart was in that moment.

“I think he’s gone,” the smallest giggled, making my ears shiver with delight. “Wow, Clover. What did you do?”

“Nothing! I just took my hood off so I could eat my pie!” She picked up her fork and stabbed at the pastry. “I’m so hungry!”

“I don’t see what all the fuss is about,” the tall girl grumped, throwing back her own hood. “My name is Violet.”

I swear to you, her beauty was so bright it hit me like the sun burns the undead to a crisp to leave a pile of dirty ashes.

Her unearthly skin was the colour of dainty marshmallows picked fresh from their shelf by moonlight! Her hair was spun from the goldest rays of morning sun to form a precious blonde waterfall cascading delicately around a face so similar, yet so different, to Clover’s.

Where Clover was like a cute little pixie, Violet possessed elegance and a regal tilt of her features which made me certain I was in the presence of true royalty!

I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.

She had to be…

“An angel,” I breathed.

“Don’t be silly,” she said with a little hiccup at the end. Her cheeks also flushed the softed pink. “I’m about to eat, Mister Taran.”

“Angel,” I repeated, a little more firmly. I admit to feeling slightly dazed. “Where are your wings?”

“Ooh!” The small one to my right grabbed my arm and jerked her hood down. “My turn! I’m Poppy! Do me next!”

I turned to her, unable to comprehend how two women of such unearthly beauty could exist in Waggenrook of all places. It shouldn’t be possib-

My jaw dropped open with an audible click.

My eyes smouldered with the burning heat of a thousand dying suns. And my heart pounded in my chest like it was being beaten flat by a Dwarven smith’s hammer.

Long milky green hair spilled from her hood like a lush canopy of mint icecream. Her skin was so milky and smooth I thought I could dive right inside her with a splash.

Then do backstroke.

Or die of heartstroke.

Either way, something was getting stroked.

She turned those eyes towards me and smiled wickedly.

“Adorable!” I cried, unable to stop myself from flailing my arms. I looked from her to Clover. Then to Violet. Back to Poppy. “You can’t be real. You are figments of my imagination. Yes, that’s what this is. The Old Twit’s whisperings have finally driven me mad.”

My hand snapped out before Poppy could react and seized her precious cheeks within my fingers and I squeeeeezed! My ears burned as she let out a happy laugh.

Letting her go, I fell back in my chair, slumping in awe.

It had been a long night.

“So adorable,” I murmured as Lilsa put another gin and tonic in my hand. She gave me a sympathetic smile and patted my head before strolling away like the professional barmaid she was.

I was so stricken by the avalanche of cuteness from my three guests that I couldn’t even muster the strength to wave goodbye to her buttocks.

“He’s really creepy,” Violet whispered, not soft enough to avoid my hearing.

“I don’t know,” Clover said. “I think he’s funny.”

“Funny in the head,” Violet snorted.

Poppy gasped, still rubbing her cheeks which were red from my squeezing them. “Don’t be mean, Violet!”

“I’m not! You have to agree, he’s a little weird. Why did he buy us pies for?”

“Hungry,” I wheezed, still battling to recover my senses. “Just came out for pies. That’s all. They’re nice pies. Try them.”

“See?” Poppy patted my shoulder. “He’s not weird. He just needs some food. We all get silly when we’re hungry.”

“I don’t,” Clover said.

Poppy looked at her.

“Alright, alright,” Clover muttered, turning back to her pie. “Point taken.”

I shrugged myself together, draining the last of my second gin and tonic in a single stressed gulp. Then I searched around for Lilsa, but she was already on her way with my third.

Bless her. She’s a saint, I tell you.

She put it down with a devious smile and gave the girls a shared wink. “Be gentle with him,” she said. “It’s his first time.”

I didn’t wave as she sauntered away this time.

I couldn’t. My mind was still reeling.

“What did she mean by that?” Poppy asked.

Violet made a strangled noise, her face bright red. Even her perfect round ears were red.

I took a big sip of gin and tonic.

“Hey, this is great,” Clover said suddenly, mouth full of pie. “Really! Try it, Poppy! Violet, how’s the chicken one?”