Chapter 11: Confessions

NADIA

I had just told Theo I liked him, and he was just staring at me.

“Did you not want me to say that?”

“Can I kiss you?”

“What?”

Theo stood up and walked over to me, cupping my face.

“Can. I. Kiss. You?” he said, enunciating each word.

“Yes.”

As soon as he registered that I’d given him permission, his lips were on mine.

Theo was an expert kisser. The kiss was soft, yet urgent.

He teased my lips with his tongue until I opened my mouth, allowing his tongue to dominate mine.

I didn’t have a lot of experience with guys. I never had the time to date, and I never wanted to bring them around with Nathan.

I had been kissed before, but not like this.

Theo moved his hands from my face without breaking the kiss. He placed one behind my neck while the other made its way to my hip.

His kiss was getting more dominant and rougher, and I liked it; I liked everything about it.

He pulled me to his body, and that’s when I felt him. He was hard, and I was embarrassed.

I had no intention of having sex with him; I had actually never had sex before.

I was embarrassed that I was in my mid-twenties and still a virgin.

I broke the kiss and took a step back.

“I’m sorry, I got carried away,” Theo said.

“It’s okay; I enjoyed it.”

Theo cleared his throat before speaking again.

“I’m going to take a shower.”

“That might be a good idea.”

As soon as he shut the bathroom door, I facepalmed myself.

~That might be a good idea?~ What the fuck, Nadia, get your shit together; guys get boners all the time; it’s nothing to be embarrassed by.

When Theo was done with his shower, I was already lying in bed with the light off.

Once he was in bed, I got up and headed to the bathroom to brush my teeth and wash my face.

I was hoping he was asleep, but he wasn’t.

“I’m sorry if I crossed a line,” he said.

“You didn’t. I freaked out a bit.”

I lay there chewing on my lip, debating if I should elaborate.

“I didn’t have a lot of experience with guys, and I got too far into my head.”

“You don’t have to be ashamed or anything about that. You’re a great kisser, sexy as hell, and the fact that you’re a writer turns me on even more. You just have to be yourself, so don’t worry about having to do anything.”

“Thanks.”

I rolled over and quickly kissed Theo on the cheek before turning over and going to sleep.

***

Subconsciously, I must have wanted Theo more than I knew, because when I woke up, I found myself entangled in him. My head was on his chest.

His arm was wrapped around me, and our legs were intertwined. It felt nice to wake up to him.

“Mmm, good morning,” Theo said. His voice was raspy, and his hair was a mess, and I felt my stomach flip when I looked up at him.

“So much for separate blankets, right?”

Theo didn’t give me a chance to respond before he quickly rolled us over.

I was now on my back while Theo hovered over me.

“I enjoyed waking up like this,” he said right before he kissed me.

The feeling that he had given me last night returned full force. My body was tingling; my core was aching, and I wanted him.

His kiss moved from my mouth to my collarbone.

Apparently, the collarbone was my spot because as he kissed and licked it, I broke out in goosebumps.

He slid the strap of my shirt down, exposing the top of my breast, where he placed small kisses across them before fully exposing them.

He wrapped his mouth around my nipple, and the sensation caused me to let out a moan.

His touches caused me to lose my thought process. It was easy to get lost in the way it made me feel.

My body was tingling, and I wanted his lips everywhere on me.

He continued to nip and lick at me, but when I felt his hand skim across my core, I was brought out of my lustful haze and pushed it away.

“I’m not ready, Theo.”

Theo sighed and moved his hand while removing his mouth from my breast.

He fixed my shirt and removed himself from the bed without saying a word.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. Never be sorry for not wanting to go any further. It’s your body; you held all the power, and you got to say what was okay and what wasn’t okay. I didn’t want you ever to feel guilty for telling me to stop. Do you understand?”

“Yes.”

“Good. I needed to take a cold shower, so I’d be out in a few minutes.”

“Were you mad at me?”

“I was mad at myself for giving in. You told me last night you weren’t comfortable, and I crossed the line again.”

“I wanted this; I enjoyed it, so it was okay. I was scared. I was…”

If I told him, would he think I was ridiculous? Would he not want to pursue me anymore?

I took a deep breath in and blurted it out.

“I’m a virgin.”

His reaction was what I expected. He started laughing.

“Is that all?” he asked.

“What do you mean, is that all?”

“There was nothing wrong with being a virgin. I respected that you had standards, and I wasn’t laughing at you; I was laughing at the fact you were nervous to tell me.”

“So, you didn’t care?”

“No, I didn’t care if you were inexperienced, and I would not force you to do anything you were not comfortable with.”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me for not being a prick. I was going to take a shower, and then, after you got ready, we could plan our day.”