Chapter 21: Chapter 20 - Seeing the Bigger Picture

Nym gnawed on a thumbnail, trying to figure out what was happening. Penny had been the first to drop, unceremoniously collapsing thirty seconds into the fight. Percy was next, losing his balance far quicker than usual and suffering a handful of heavy blows from the seminarians, knocking him to the ground and leaving him in a daze. Deb and Jenna, for all their skill and poise on the battlefield, were left outnumbered, and a moment later, the spar was over – a complete victory for the seminarians.

She sighed to herself, turning to Loria beside her. “It’s like this every time,” she said. The team of seminarians kept their celebration short, helping the members of team A back to their feet with kind words and smiles.

Loria nodded. “No matter how many times I see it, I can’t get a feel for Vincent’s Gift.” Vincent Reed was one of the seminarians who had just taken down team A. He was also a member of their advanced PMT class, and he had a powerful Gift – something invisible that left you delirious and open to attacks. Add that to his almost unparalleled skill with a PMT and he was one of the few members of their class that could consistently best Loria in a spar. She turned to Cliff. “Any idea what happened?” Loria asked the tall boy. He had a thoughtful frown on his face as he stared across the sparring ring, and Nym thought she could see his Gift racing through his mind.

“Maybe, but – hold on,” he said, jogging off towards team A. He immediately started pressing them with questions, pointing and flailing his arms like an overenthusiastic child.

Nym watched him go, an amused smile on her face. “Do you think he can figure it out?”

“Perhaps,” Loria said, furrowing her eyebrows, “though if he did, I admit it would be a little irritating.”

Nym nodded, grunting in agreement. Vince’s Gift was a hotly debated topic among the Advanced PMT kids. The seminarian himself remained tight-lipped about his Gift, but the others were rampant with speculation. At first, someone had suggested it involved eye contact, but that was thrown out after half a dozen losses with people forcing themselves to look away from the boy. Next, someone suggested it had to do with feeling and numbness – Nym herself had put that theory to the test, biting her lip through the entire spar, hoping the pain would keep her focused. It hadn’t. The best results had come when Loria proposed it had to do with movement – keep moving and his Gift wouldn’t take effect. Even that, though, had proven limited in its effectiveness, and so the mystery remained. If Cliff could figure it out this quickly – well, she wouldn’t be unhappy, but it would be a little anticlimactic.

“If anyone can do it, it’s Cliff,” Thalos said, “Though I wish he’d hurry up – there’s not that much time until our fight.” The schedule for the spars was rather dense, and they only had a short break before it was their turn to go against Vince’s team.

A moment later, Cliff returne, a conflicted frown on his face. “No luck?” Nym asked, feeling almost a little relieved that there was some limit to her teammate’s Gift. Sometimes his perception almost scared her, the way he could immediately deconstruct anything – he’d taken apart her and Penny’s gifts with little more than a few seconds of watching.

“What?” Cliff asked, “oh no, I figured out what he did in the spar, it’s just-” He paused to click his tongue, an annoying tic he had whenever he was lost in thought. “I can’t exactly figure out the limits of his Gift like this, and I have an itch it’s something more, but-” He shook his head, looking at Loria with a serious expression. “He’s doing something to the air.”

Nym’s eyes widened. “The air?”

Cliff nodded. “Yeah, I’m almost certain. A few things tipped me off. First, team A, when they went down, they were all gasping for breath.”

“Could that not be simply because they’d had their energy sapped somehow?” Loria asked.

Cliff scratched at the back of his neck, shaking his head. “It could be, but – I noticed some of the seminarians were holding their breath, but only when they got close to our folk. Either Percy smells absolutely ripe, or-”

“Or there’s something in the air,” Loria muttered with a thoughtful frown, “That tracks with our experiences with him in our advanced PMT class, too. Moving quickly works because you’re dodging the foul air, so to speak.”

“Exactly,” Cliff confirmed with a nod, “It’s some kind of localized change in the substance that makes up the air – something that is odorless and colorless but still makes you pass out.” He shook his head. “I’m fairly certain there’s more to it than that, but that’s all I could get from watching that spar.”

Loria smiled confidently. “Don’t apologize – that’s more than enough to get us started, tactically at least. Well done, Cliff – it turns out you can be useful for a fight, when you’re not throwing fireballs at my back.”

Cliff grinned toothily. “Oh, come on!” he said with feigned outrage, “I thought we were past that.”

Nym and Thalos shared a surprised look. Their bickering duo cooperating like this was the last thing she’d expected to see. She wondered if something had happened, or if they were simply growing as people. That thought made her frown, if only because she still couldn’t push past the problems she’d come to the academy with.

***

“If both teams are ready,” Sister Aster called, “three, two, one – start!” As one, team B took off at a full sprint. Nym felt a flicker of uncertainty in her stomach as she dashed across the ring, but if Loria said this was their best bet, Nym wasn’t about to second guess her. In front of her, she saw the seminarians’ eyes widen as team B barreled towards them with reckless abandon.

They hadn’t had long to strategize between Cliff’s discovery and their match, and the best they could come up with was a very un-Loria-like strategy. If they came at the seminarians with any sort of caution, Vince’s Gift would eventually take them down, no matter how much they tried to hold their breath. Plus, their use of ranged attackers put them at a disadvantage when he could just mess with the air around them. Thus, rough-and-tumble.

Cliff had the longest legs, and so he was the first to reach his target. With a yell and a swing of the barrel of his rifle, he slapped the seminarian’s sword aside, lowering his shoulder and knocking the other boy from his feet as they went down in a mass of flailing fists. Nym was next, leaning into a sideways swing of her quarterstaff, smashing into a girl’s shield and following up with a diving tackle. Her breath was squeezed from her lungs as they bounced off the ground, rolling to the side as she struggled to get leverage and constrain the other girl. After a moment she managed to slam a fist into the ground, using her Gift to wrap the girl’s legs in shackles of clay. The girl shouted a protest, somehow catching Nym in the stomach with her elbow, but by that point, Nym already had her wrapped up in a bear hug, completely immobilizing her.

A few seconds passed as Nym grinned angrily at the other girl, ignoring her shouts of protest. If she was shouting, Nym knew, she was breathing, and Loria’s strategy was working as intended – you can’t very well hold your breath when you’re rolling around on the ground.

“Enough!” Sister Aster screamed. Immediately, Nym released her still-furious opponent, using her Gift to unbind the girl’s legs and hopping to her feet. The other girl ignored Nym’s offered hand, and she couldn’t help but laugh - they weren’t nearly so gracious when they were the ones being helped up. She looked around the ring – Thalos and his target had separated, but Cliff and his were still going at it, rolling around and throwing fists as Roose tried to pull them apart. Loria was chatting amicably with a smiling Vince.

“What in Gaeon’s name was that?” Sister Aster barked when things were finally calmed. They’d been lined up for a scolding, the Magepriestess looking furious while Roose seemed barely able to contain his laughter.

“Our strategy, ma’am,” Loria said with perfect seriousness, her hands clasped behind her back.

“Your strategy?” The flustered woman replied, crossing her arms and glaring at Loria, “Your strategy was to – to wrestle like animals?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Loria said, the barest hint of a smile pulling up the corners of her mouth.

“Do you find this funny?” Sister Aster asked, “Must I remind you that this is a spar, not a brawl?”

“A spar we won, I reckon,” Cliff said. His lip was split and blood outlined his teeth, but he was grinning.

“Quiet, Everhart,” Sister Aster snapped, “Don’t forget that you did not listen when I called for an end to the spar.”

“It takes two to tumble, ma’am,” Cliff replied, and a sputtered laugh forced itself out of Nym. The angry woman turned her glare on Nym, and she bit her lip to stop the giggles from coming.

“I don’t see the problem, Sister,” Vince said, looking quietly amused at the whole situation, “sure, their strategy was a little unorthodox, but that’s the point of these spars, right?” He seemed to be the only one okay with the results, as the other seminarians were all glaring daggers at team B.

“You stay out of this, Vince,” Sister Aster said, “Why do you think I’m-”

“Now, now, Sister,” Roose said, stepping forward and placing a hand on her shoulder, “I believe young Vincent is correct here. This should serve as a lesson for everyone that sometimes its appropriate to forego propriety for the sake of a quick victory, no? You can’t expect every fight to follow conventions, can you?” The Sister did not look convinced, so Roose added. “Don’t worry, I’ll remind my students of proper sparring etiquette.” He turned towards team B, winking in a way that none of the seminarians or Sister Aster would see.

The Magepriestess’s lips pinched all the way to one side. “See that you do,” she grumbled before whirling to the seminarians. “Come now, Vince, the rest of you. We need to talk about why their little stunt succeeded.”

“Wait, hold on,” Cliff called, “did we win?”

Sister Aster fired an angry glare over her shoulder, and Roose stepped between the two. “Come on now, Cliff, we’re not trying to make enemies here,” their advisor said, spreading his arms to huddle them into a circle. He spoke again in a lower voice. “Yes, you won, and good thing, too – she’d been bragging all week that her seminarians were going to run circles around you guys.” He glanced around their team with an approving smile. “I take it Cliff had something to do with the plan? It’s got his fingerprints all over it.”

Cliff shook his head. “I cracked the nut of Vince’s Gift, but the rest was the brain-child of our commander.”

Roose nodded appreciatively. “I wouldn’t have expected Loria to come up with something so, well, crude, if you’ll forgive the description.”

Loria shrugged a shoulder with a surprisingly bashful smile. “I’ve seen how Vince fights – his team too. Very cautious and strategic. The thing is – strategy won’t get you very far when you get tackled to the dirt.”

Roose laughed brightly. “Astute,” he said, “very astute. Now go get some water – Cliff looks like something out of a horror story with his bloodstained smile, and I’d rather not have any nightmares tonight.”

***

“I haven’t heard of half of these monsters,” Percy complained, “and I’m from Clearspring.”

“I thought you were from Thatchtop,” Thalos said without looking up.

“Same thing, basically,” Percy muttered, resting his head on the desk in front of them.

“At least this list seems fairly comprehensive,” Nym said, underlining one of the monsters. The Branchrotter was little more than an overgrown slug, but its slime was highly valuable for some reason she couldn’t understand. It was a high priority ingredient on their foraging list. “I’ve seen some lists for high-level areas – they’re mostly question marks and big angry text that says ‘Avoid This!’.”

Their team had a good relationship with team A, and so on the lead up to the second Hands-on, they found themselves working together. The other team’s mission was a bit different – instead of repairing a bridge and foraging in the wilderness, they were completing a delivery circuit between some small villages – but the prep work was mostly the same. She looked up from the list towards Percy, the other team’s scout. “Did you guys get approval on your route, yet?”

Percy sat up, flipping through some pages before handing her a map. “Our mission meant we didn’t really have to chart a path at all – this is a well-traveled circuit of villages, so we just have to follow the same route everyone else uses. Most of my work has been studying the maps to schedule rest and delivery timings.”

“Speaking of which,” Penny added, frowning down at her page, “have you decided if we’ll be staying in town on the second night? I have to book lodging, if that’s the case.”

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Percy shook his head. “It just doesn’t make sense – I talked to Deb about it, and we decided to camp on the road.” Penny scrunched up her face, and Nym smiled. Her roommate was pretty particular about sleeping arrangements and hygiene – she’d been complaining nonstop about it since the second Hands-on had been announced.

“At least you’ll have a bed on some nights,” Nym said, “we’re stuck on the roadside the entire time.” Not that she particularly minded the camping – it reminded her of childhood trips with her father between cities.

“I know, I know,” Penny said with a pout, “I barely managed to convince Deb to take one night in a hotel – but it’s okay for a girl to have standards, right?”

“You are very lucky your commander is not Loria,” Thalos said dryly, “I believe you would offend that girl to her very core if you tried to argue for comfort over practicality.”

“Speaking of our commanders, any idea where they went?” Percy said, glancing around. Most of the apprentice couriers were spread about the room, but in the lead up to the next Hands-on, they’d been mostly let off the leash, and a handful were nowhere to be found.

“Loria went to argue some detail of our mission brief with Roose,” Nym said, “Apparently the language wasn’t specific enough for her.”

“Go figure,” Penny said wryly, adding, “I think Deb is searching for Jenna – off to interrupt her romantic time with Cliff, no doubt.” Nym winced at the thought of coming upon them in a private moment.

“Oh, come on,” Percy said, “no need to tease them – Cliff’s been all kinds of busy, you know, with the threat of transfer and everything else.”

“Plus he’s got that research project he’s been recruited into,” Thalos said.

“And he’s building his own nodes,” Penny added with a frown, “it’s no wonder he has to sneak off during class with Jenna – there’s not enough hours in a day.”

“Come to think of it, is he going to be ready in time?” Percy asked, tone suddenly concerned.

Thalos looked up from his paper, shrugging his shoulders. “I wouldn’t worry about it,” he said, “If worst comes to worst, he can still use the basic nodes he’s approved for – but I can’t see Cliff showing up with anything that’s not ridiculous.”

Nym nodded in agreement with Thalos. She wasn’t exactly close with Cliff, but she knew his lackadaisical demeanor was a cover for a surprisingly fierce work ethic. “What about you all?” Nym asked, glancing between Penny and Percy, “you think you’ll be ready?”

The pair looked between each other, expressions uneasy. “I think so,” Penny finally said, “but…” She trailed off.

“Deb is about to explode from stress,” Percy explained, “and it’s causing a bit of tension with Jenna.”

“They’re fighting?” Thalos asked.

Percy shook his head quickly. “No, not fighting – not really, at least. It’s just – Deb keeps bringing up what happened during the first Hands-on.” He looked over at Penny. “She’s being a little – uh, strict, you could say, with the rest of us because she doesn’t want to repeat any kind of mistakes. I mean, I get it, and she’s working herself even harder than she’s telling us to work, but Jenna is a bit annoyed at the constant questions.”

“Honestly, I am too,” Penny added with a little sardonic chuckle, “but when I see how stressed Deb is – I mean she’s just doing it for us, and – well, I understand.”

“You’re doing okay, though, Penny?” Nym asked, “I mean, you were the one who actually got hurt last time, right?”

Penny shrugged. “Honestly, I can hardly remember what happened. I’m more worried about sleeping on the road than anything else.” She paused for a second, looking over at Nym. “But what about you? Have you figured out your issues with your Gift?”

Nym’s stomach sunk. “No – I mean – not exactly. I think it’s getting better, but…”

“Issues with your Gift?” Percy said with a concerned expression, “what issues?”

Nym plastered an awkward smile on her face. “Well, it’s just – I’m not particularly good at using my Gift outside of certain situations. I can use it fine in the sparring circles, and with ice, and everything like that, but in the wilderness it’s a bit harder.”

Thalos frowned at her. “Why haven’t you told us this is still an issue?” he asked, an annoyed note in his voice. She could understand his frustration – they were teammates, after all, and her own shortcomings could lead to him getting hurt. She’d mentioned it during the first Hands-on, but she wasn’t exactly proud of airing out her weaknesses.

“Loria already knows,” she quickly explained, “and, well, I’m not particularly pleased that I can’t get my Gift working. It’s embarrassing.”

Percy and Thalos shared a look. “Is it?” Percy asked, “I don’t have a Gift, so I wouldn’t know.”

“It is,” Nym said emphatically, “A Gift is supposed to be part of you – if you can’t use it, that’s like, being unable to eat!”

“Don’t most Gifts have limitations?” Thalos asked.

“Well yeah, but – this is a control thing, not a limitation of my Gift.” Nym said, sighing heavily in frustration. It was hard to explain – impossible, really, because each Gift was unique. She knew it was some kind of mental block, something about the way she had learned or how she was thinking about it that stopped her from effectively using her Gift outside of a controlled environment. That’s what made it so frustrating – no matter how much she tried to ‘trust her instincts’ as her father always told her, she was stuck.

“You should talk to Roose,” Cliff said from behind her. As a group, they turned to see him approaching the table, Jenna and Deb behind him. The two girls were glaring at each other, and the way Cliff had separated himself from them, it seemed like he really didn’t want to get involved.

“Roose?” Nym asked incredulously.

“Yeah,” Cliff said with a nod. “He’s the one who helped me fix my PMT problem. I’ve asked him for advice, once or twice, and it’s always sound.”

“I think Cliff’s right,” Thalos said, “his lighthearted demeanor covers a lot of experience, and my – that is, he has to be pretty sharp for them to put him in charge of our class, right?”

“Roose,” Nym said again, considering. She hadn’t really thought about going to the Templar for advice. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust him, or anything like that, but her Gift problem – she wasn’t even sure what kind of advice he could give.

“What’s got the girls glaring at each other,” Percy asked as Cliff took a seat at the table.

“Don’t ask,” he said shortly.

“Deb has never heard of privacy, I learned today,” Jenna said with a glare for her commander.

“I thought you would be working – it is class-time after all, and we have the Hands-on coming up!”

“Oh? We’re going there? I already finished all of my prep work! We could leave tomorrow and I’d be completely fine!”

“I know, but-” Deb sputtered, the two spinning off into a quiet argument.

“I told you not to ask,” Cliff muttered with a wince.

***

With a deep breath, Nym extended her will through the ground, reaching, desperately towards the ball across the field. It felt good, for an instant, but then – she was suddenly lost. She growled, extending a hand, reaching upwards with her Gift. Earth sprung up, clasping the ball, and she fell backwards onto her rear, tears coming to her eyes.

Thirty-one. It had taken her thirty-one tries to grab the ball. She’d thought she was getting better, that it was just a matter of time before she figured it out, but – thirty-one.

She hugged her knees to her chest, trying to stop herself from sobbing. Hours of practice every day, and she had not improved in two months since coming to the academy. If anything, she thought she was getting worse. The tears threatened to come, and she dragged her wrist angrily across her face. The sun had long since set, but she’d promised, sworn, she wasn't going back until she made some improvement. As it was, she felt like she was throwing herself against a brick wall.

Sighing, she dragged herself to her feet, walking over to free the ball from where she’d grabbed it in earth. She kicked at the mound of dirt angrily, venting her frustration until the little red orb shot free, rolling away. With a hissed breath, she stomped over, grabbing it off the ground and tossing it to a good practice distance – in a better mood, she might line up the distance exactly, but her patience for that was long since frayed.

She breathed deeply, trying to to reclaim her focus, placing her palm on the ground. Like a phantom limb, she shot her Gift through the ground, reaching out, until – just next to the ball, earth shot up, knocking it to the side but failing to clasp it. This time, she couldn’t stop the tears.

“Nym?” a voice called a moment later. In a panic, she scrubbed at her eyes, blinking the tears away and rising shakily to her feet.

“Roose?” she said, squinting past the blurriness, “is that you?” Her voice was hoarse to her ears, and she felt an embarrassed flush rising in her face.

“Ah – yeah,” he said, coming closer, “it’s late, what are you doing out here?” He paused with a frown. “Not that you’re not allowed to be here, it’s just-” He cut off suddenly. “Are – are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” she lied, “did Cliff send you?” She recalled how her teammate had suggested she ask Roose for advice. Maybe his Gift had told him that the Templar would be useful. She laughed bitterly at the thought. At least someone could use their Gift.

“Cliff? No – I was just walking back, but – are you sure?” The teacher wore a rare concerned expression on his face, his normal smile completely gone. “Do you want to talk?”

“No,” she said, “Yes. I don’t know. Can you help me?”

He studied her for a moment. “Maybe,” he finally said, “here.” He walked over and sat on the ground a few steps to the side of her – far enough, she hoped, that he couldn’t see how tear-stained her face was. She collapsed back down to the ground, and they sat in silence for a moment while she considered what to say.

He spoke before she did. “You were practicing your Gift,” Roose observed, looking around at the various piles of dirt. He laughed lightly. “I know I told you not to worry about the landscaping at the beginning of the year, but – well, it doesn’t matter now. What seems to be the problem?”

She stared at the professor for a moment before responding. “I can’t seem to figure out how to get my Gift to work,” she said, “I try and I try, but-” She gestured around her. “Just piles of dirt.”

“Your gift,” Roose replied with a thoughtful hum, “that’s a hard one. What, exactly, is the problem you’re having?”

She rubbed a hand at her cheek, suddenly tired, and realized again how late it was. “Control,” she said, “I can get it to work whenever the material isn’t homogenous– it’s why I prefer to keep ice in my PMT. The crystalline structure makes it really easy to use my Gift. Clay is easy, and pure stone – things like that. Out here though-” She thumped a hand on the ground. “It’s roots, and bugs, and gaps, and pebbles.” She shook her head.

Roose frowned. “I – see,” he said, sounding a bit unsure, “so, when the material is inconsistent, it’s harder to aim your Gift?” She grunted agreement, and he continued, “Can you tell me your exact thought process, when you’re using your gift?”

“Well,” she said, thinking aloud, “Usually, I imagine the material – the ground, or ice, or whatever – as little rooms that I’m running my gift through. For regular material, every room is the same size, the same dimensions, right? Little square rooms, so it’s easy to keep track of where I am. With the ground here, it’s different – first there’s a triangle room, then a square, then an octagon, then a circle – and they’re not even the same size.” She looked over at him bitterly. “How am I supposed to keep track when it’s like that?”

The professor nodded, lost in thought. “That makes sense, I think.” He paused suddenly, frowning. “Did you ever bring this up to your father?” She nodded. “What did he say?”

She laughed mirthlessly. “He gave me some vague advice to ‘use my intuition’ or ‘trust myself’ – not especially helpful when my intuition is what’s tripping me up, is it?” Her father was a lot of things – a skillful Courier, a kind man, a good father, but he wasn’t a particularly skilled teacher. His own style relied largely on feelings and impressions, and trying to pull some lesson out of his words was like starting with the ending of a book and trying to guess the entire story.

Roose laughed. “I see even the Puppetmaster has his shortcomings.” He paused, a conflicted expression on his face. “Well, I’ve thought of something,” he said, “but are you sure you want my advice? Gifts are unique, individual things – I could throw off your progress if my advice is bad.”

She sighed. “I’ll take anything at this point – I haven’t made any progress since coming here. No matter what you say, it’s got to be better than that.”

“Maybe,” Roose said lightly. “Well, it’s like this-” He fished a pen and a notepad from one of his cassock’s deep pockets. “Have you ever drawn a circle?”

She blinked. “A circle?”

“When you draw a circle, it’s important not to focus on too small a part – narrow your focus too far, and it’s hard to keep the destination in mind.” He sketched on the notepad for a moment, chuckling to himself. “It’s much easier to just, well, draw a circle – otherwise you end up with this jagged imitation – you’ll almost never hit exactly where you want to. Here, take a look.” He said, tossing her the notepad and pen. “Try it for yourself, if you’d like.”

She stared down at the notepad, where there were two circles were drawn – or, two shapes. The top was less of a circle and more a collection of little line segments that were vaguely round, but completely missed the connection when the circle was complete. The bottom was a single, swift line – it wasn’t a perfect circle, but it was much better.

Following his advice, she flipped the pad to a new page, taking the pen and, as he said, drawing a circle not as a single shape, but focusing on each little part. Sure enough, by the time she got around, she’d completely misjudged where it was supposed to connect. Suddenly, she was laughing to herself.

“I think you’ve figured it out, but it’s like this – I think your method, as intuitive as it is, misses the bigger picture – I mean, try walking staring only at your feet. Sure, you’ll keep moving, step by step, but soon enough you’ll veer off your path, going who knows where.” She drew another circle, this time with a single line where she kept the larger image in mind. A nice, neat circle was the result.

She tossed him the notepad and pen, reaching down and pressing her palm on the ground. Again, she reached out with her Gift. This time, though, instead of imagining a maze of rooms, she stuck a mental flag in the ground at the ball, not worrying about how her Gift got there, but trusting it would.

An instant later, the ball was crushed in a fist of earth, and relief bloomed in her stomach.

She fell back on her rear, not crying this time, but laughing. After a moment of hysterics she turned to Roose, who was watching her with an amused smile. “Cliff was right,” she said, “you are good.”

“Well,” Roose said, pushing himself to his feet, “I am a teacher, after all.”

“Thank you, Templar Roose – really.”

He waved a hand in front of him. “Think nothing of it – just remember to come to me next time you’ve got a problem like this. It’s my job, after all.” He smiled at her a moment more before looking around. “Now come on, you should get some sleep – the Hands-on is coming up and I wouldn’t want you to ruin your sleep schedule.”

“You go ahead,” she said with a chuckle, “I’ll stay back, for just a few more minutes. I’ve got some circles to draw, you understand.”