CHAPTER 34
MISHTI'S POV
I sat looking at the full moon, that shined brightly amidst the blanket of darkness. I sneaked out of my home and reached our place earlier than usual tonight, since I couldn't sit in my room without thinking about everything. Even though I know that Abir wouldn't lie to all of us without a solid reason, I couldn't help but feel hurt at the fact that he didn't want to share whatever it was, with me.
Along with the gushing sound of the water, I heard a few footsteps and I immediately sat alert, awaiting his presence near me. After a few seconds, I felt him sit near me on our huge rock.
After a few minutes of silence, I decided to get straight to the point, "Tell me everything, Abir. No lies this time. I want to hear the entire truth."
He answered very softly, "It was my fifth birthday. My father passed away."
I sighed, because I knew that it was somehow connected to his father. I waited for him to continue, because I knew he was itching to tell me more.
His voice was very soft when he spoke, as if he was whispering, "Do you remember, when we were kids, you must have been around four years old... you had asked me where my father was. I didn't know what to tell you, so I told you what Parul Maasi kept telling me, that he went to meet God. When you asked me why, I told you that he went to complain about you to God, since you were refusing to eat food. Well, I lied."
I turned to face him to see him looking at the fast-flowing stream, as if deep in thought, "It was because of me.", he barely whispered.
I frowned. It did not make sense to me, "What do you mean?"
He replied as if in a trance, "I barely remember anything about my father anymore, but one thing I remember is ho- how happy we were. One of the few things that I remember about my father was that he was a chirpy man. Happy always. Even though we weren't well off back then, we were ha- happy with what we had. But I- I spoiled everything."
I could feel that it was very difficult for him to share whatever it was with me. So, I joined our hands together, interlaced our fingers and gently pressed his hand, as a form of reassurance.
He stared at our entwined fingers as he continued, "I- I had asked for a stupid car to play with, as my birthday gift. My mother warned. She freaking told me that we could buy it some other day. But no, I was adamant. I wanted to buy it on that freaking day. And- and when my dad was crossing the road after he bought it, a- a truck hit him. He- he didn't make it."
By now, fat tears were rolling down his eyes. My heart clenched hearing him and without a second thought, I reached for him, pulled him towards me and hugged him tightly. He clutched me tightly and I could hear his heart wrenching sobs break through the silent atmosphere.
He hugged me even tighter, if possible, "It- it was because of me, Mishti. Ha- had I not asked for it, h- he would have been with us now. He- he would be getting ready to wish m- my birthday now. My- my mother would have made sw- sweets for my bi- birthday. We would have been ha- happy. Everything happened because of me"
As soon as I heard what happened, my heart clenched at the pain he went through for all these years. What made me even sadder was the fact that he has kept all these emotions bottled up, without talking and expressing it to anyone else.
I rubbed his back and kept whispering sweet nothings, "Shh its okay, Abir. It wasn't because of you."
He replied with his muffled voice, "No Mishti. It was because of me. Everything happened because of me. Everything. I- I killed him, Mishtipie."
I was shocked hearing him blame himself for something that wasn't in his control. I pulled him back and gently wiped his tears, "No Abir. Listen to me. You aren't responsible for anything. Do you understand? You aren't. Whatever happened was an accident. You cannot and will not blame yourself for an accident that took place, merely because you witnessed it. Okay? You can never be. It was an accident, an unfortunate one. But you should not blame yourself for it, Abbi."
He cried silently for a few minutes before he put his head on my lap and snuggled in closer to my stomach. My hands threaded through his dark locks, caressing them with my hands.
He fiddled with my top as he spoke, "Mishtipie?"
"Hmm?"
He sniffed, "Why do the people I love so much always leave me?"
After a pause, he continued, "I loved my father a lot. He left all of us. Nanu doesn't want to stay here with us. I loved my mom a lot, but she doesn't want to talk to me anymore. She- she too believes that I killed dad. Why?"
I frowned, "Your mom believes that? Did she tell so herself?"
He shook his head, "She didn't tell me. But I know. She stopped talking to me ever since the accident."
I took a deep breath, "Your father didn't leave you, Abir. He still here, watching over you. He's been watching you every day. In fact, right now, he is heartbroken because you are still blaming yourself for his death. The last thing he did before he died was buy you a gift so that you would remain happy always. Imagine how sad he would be right now seeing you like this."
I could feel my top getting wet, "B- but mumma?"
I rolled my eyes, "Your mumma? She will come around, don't worry. I am pretty sure she doesn't blame you for uncle's death. Yeah, she did neglect you, did not treat you well, but I think she is rational enough to not blame you for something like this. Also, Abir, they aren't the only people in the world who love you."
I kept telling what came to my mind, to ease the pain in his heart, "Nanu loves you a lot. So so much! My parents love you, Kunal does too! And let me tell you, as a person who is in madly love with you, it hurts when you think nobody else loves you."
I stilled, once my words registered in my mind. Through his tear-stained eyes, he looked up at me with his mouth agape. He whispered, "You what?"
He got up and sat straight looking at me with shock and I immediately missed the warmth his body gave me, "I- um- Abir, I- "
He cut me off, "Let's finish this topic right here, right now. You love me?"
Knowing there is no way back, I sigh and look down, "Yeah, I do. I love you."
He lifted my face with his hands, making me look into his eyes, "Is it the way I think? I mean, you're not talking about the kind best friends have, right?"
I shook my head frantically, "No, no, no. Not at all. I love you, the forever kind."
His breathing got shallow, "No, no. You can't love me! You just can't, Mishti!"
I frowned, "And why not? Tell me one valid reason, Abir."
He looked everywhere but my eyes and shook his head, "You just can't Mishti! I- I am b- bad luck. I can't watch something happen to you because of me. I already lost my dad. I can't lose you too. Please Mishti, no. Don't. Just forget me, please. We- we can't be together, we just can't!"
I looked at him incredulously, "Because of you? Oh, so global warming is because of you, people dying due to Corona virus is also because of you, huh? Don't give yourself so much credit. People die every day, Abir. We don't live forever. But I want to live my forever with you and only you. Get that into your head."
He whispered, his voice shaking, "But why? Why do you love me?"
I cupped his face, "What do you not have? You have everything I ever wanted in my life partner. You're soft, kind, loving and caring. And most importantly, you are very understanding. You understand me like no one else does. I am so proud of you, Abbi. How you have handled yourself all alone, all these years. I am proud of you. But from now, I want to be there for that too. You have always shared your happy times with me. I want you to share your sad ones with me too. I want to be with you when you are in your most vulnerable. I want to be there to hold you every time you fall, just like you hold me. Will you let me in, Abir?"
He whispered hopefully, "You want to be with me?"
I smiled looking at tears pooling his eyes, "Yes."
His voice shook, "F- forever?"
I spoke strongly, "Forever and ever."
A hint of a smile played on his lips, "Really?"
I kissed the tip of his nose, "Really. Even if you don't love me now, I will wait forever for you to reciprocate my feelings. I will never go anywhere"
He grinned through his tears and shook his head, his dull mood from a few moments ago flying away, "No! You don't have to wait. Cause, I love you more, Mishtipie. The forever kind, too. It will take time for me to accept a relationship, but I do love you. A lot. B- but never give up on me, Mishtipie. Because if you leave me now, I'll break into smithereens. Please, Mishti."
I wiped the new tears that coursed down his cheeks, "Never. Never ever."
And with that, he kissed me. Softly and gently, as if trying to pour all his love into this kiss. I felt tingles spread through every inch of my body, making my toes curl. He pulled me closer to him by my waist and I could feel him smile through the kiss. I couldn't help but blush, as I wounded my hands around his neck, threading my hands through his hair.
As we pulled back, he held my face and our foreheads were interconnected, as we tried to regain our breaths. Abir had a giddy smile on his lips and I knew I would be smiling like an idiot right now.
Just as we were about to kiss once again, loud firecrackers burst through the dark sky, lighting the entire place with its colorful lights. I grinned and turned back to Abir, to see him already looking at me, "Happy New Year, Mishtipie."
I kissed his nose, "Happy birthday, love."
He grinned at me, "Mishtipie, why are you like this?"
I blushed and smiled, "Like what?"
"Like a Goddess."
With that, he pasted his lips on mine once again, hoping for not just a year full of togetherness, but a life-time full of it.
***
Hey guys! This is Chapter 34! Have a happy and a prosperous New Year!
Hope you guys loved this Chapter - the proper MishBir confession many had been waiting for. I don't know if I made justice to it, but I hope it was up to your expectations!
This is New Year gift number two from me. I've uploaded the synopsis of my second MishBir fanfiction, His Bride! Please do read it, send in your feedback and also add it to your library!
I will post it's first chapter soon, after which I will publish chapters only after this one gets completed. I don't want to keep both the books incomplete : )
Thank you for your love and support this year! Hope you guys will support me the same way in 2022 too!