Chapter 74: CH 73

“And then, that obviously otaku guy said. Go out with me… It’s not funny, or rather, I want to laugh”

“Jeez… You can’t, Misaki-chan. After all, that person must’ve tried his best”

“Ah, Kosaki is a good girl. Showing compassion to such an otaku guy”

“Tha, that’s not the… case. Rei-chan too thinks so, right?”

I came to my senses at hearing my name called out.

A girl with short-cut hair dyed light brown and a girl with black hair cut in a shoulder-length bob were looking at me.

We’re in a classroom of Yurigaoka Academy Middle School.

As for me – Oohashi Rei, I was enjoying the usual trifling chat with the two girls I’m close with.

“Rei-chan?”

“Um, it’s nothing. Yeah. Well, Misaki is popular so you rate guys harshly”

“I know, right”

Saying so, Kosaki nodded many times.

Misaki is a child who plays the central role in the class, Kosaki and I are her followers… It might be too abject, but well, it’s such a position.

Misaki, who’s athletic and reasonably good at studying, is an expressive and unyielding child.

If I had to say, Kosaki is shy, she’s the type likely to be bullied, but because her name happened to resemble Misaki’s, they became close, since then they continued being friendly earning them a name of “SakiSaki Duo”.

If Misaki were a large-flowered rose, Kosaki would be a lone dandelion blooming on the side of a road.

Speaking of myself, I’m just an ordinary person whose only good point is being tall, I’m just a background character without particular traits.

I feel embarrassed to compare myself to a flower, but I think I’d be a Canadian goldenrod at best.

I don’t like feeling out of place in class, so I somehow belong to Misaki’s group.

However, recently that hasn’t been the only reason.

“I wonder. I mean, don’t those otaku fantasize about 2D women?”

“It, it’s just prejudice, Misaki-chan”

“No, it’s absolutely like this. I have an older brother who also owns manga. So, I’ve read some of them, and it’s really that awful”

Starting with that, Misaki talked about how manga read by otaku idolize and fetishize women.

I’m not into manga or anime much, but I thought what Misaki’s saying is quite prejudiced.

Of course, I didn’t say that.

I don’t know how exactly it’s in men’s world, but in women’s world, there’s a very innocent “air”.

Usually, a tragic end awaits those whose actions deviate from that “air”.

Specifically, bullying and ostracizing.

I’m a person who can’t read the air much, even so I’m not a slow person who can’t understand the danger of stating my opinion to Misaki.

Kosaki’s words from earlier were only met with light rebuttal because she’s Misaki’s favorite.

“Speaking of otaku, there are also women. What was it? Bee el? They are stimulated by relationship between men. Gross”

What I heard startled me.

I’m not really a fujoshi.

Rather, it’s the opposite.

I forcibly stopped myself from stealing glances at Kosaki like I’ve been doing since a while ago.

Recently, I can’t help but have Kosaki on my mind.

Her small animal-like sweetness is completely on my mind.

Even if I’m such a big woman, I’m still a woman, so I like cute things.

That’s why at first I thought it was an emotion like that, but it doesn’t seem like it.

The gesture of brushing up her hair, her juicy lips painted with lipstick, her bashful smile – every single Kosaki’s casual part makes my heart throb.

Because I’m old enough, I do have some knowledge.

There are things like lezzes and yuri.

I felt terrified of those distorted – at that time I still thought that – romantic feelings.

This heresy would be a simple way to become ostracized at school.

The first and foremost aim of abiding by the air I mentioned earlier is because people are like this.

While concealing the turmoil inside, I replied to Misaki with a yeah.

It would be awful if it somehow got exposed to her.

“For example, isn’t she that?”

Saying so, Misaki pointed at another girl.

She was a bespectacled girl with naturally curly hair.

“Speaking of Katano, isn’t she always drawing something? It looks like some gross manga”

“That’s not the case. She’s skilled?”

“Kosaki, don’t defend that girl”

Contrary to Kosaki’s quiet rebuke, Misaki’s voice is relatively loud.

Katano-san who certainly should’ve heard it, kept silently drawing without showing she minds it.

“Rei, what do you think? Isn’t that sort of thing gross?”

Misaki inquired.

While subtly implying I should agree.

“Umm… Well, I don’t understand it”

“I know, right. It’s impossible to understand. It’s truly gross”

I intended to give a neutral opinion, but Misaki took it as an affirmation.

While I was thinking that Katano-san isn’t really in the wrong, I couldn’t help but think of the person herself.

When I glanced at her, our eyes met.

I looked away in panic.

“What, Katano? Do you have a problem?”

“… Not really”

Noticing Katano-san looking here, Misaki threatened her.

Katano-san replied in a weak voice, and immediately returned to drawing.

“What’s with her. Feels gross”

“Misaki-chan! Jeez… Sorry, Katano-san”

Misaki spat out and Kosaki said to smooth it over.

I feel terribly uncomfortable, I can’t even explain what I meant by the words I said to Misaki at this point.

As a result, I’m complicit in shunning Katano-san.

Feelings of guilt made my chest heavy.

“That’s why otaku are hated. They can’t read the air at all”

“Now now… Katano-san is a type to do things her own way, surely”

Afterwards, Misaki kept talking how otaku, including Katano-san, are generally unpleasant.

I thought she didn’t have to go that far, but after all I couldn’t object.

Being excluded from the girl’s world at school was that terrifying.

Even if you don’t do anything, you might get ostracized.

But, on the other hand, I yearned for Katano-san’s situation.

The situation of being able to do what she likes in defiance of the “air”.

Katano-san clearly has a strength that I don’t.

I strongly envied that appearance of not fearing loneliness.

(If I became like her, Kosaki would also――)

I shook my head to drive out the dangerous thought that suddenly appeared.

“What’s wrong, Rei-chan?”

“Um, it’s nothing”

To Kosaki who slightly tilted her head, I responded with a smile meant to deceive her.

This feeling is not that.

I’m just slightly misunderstanding friendship.

Isn’t it often said.

That us girls tend to have feelings similar to romantic feelings for the same sex.

Surely when I grow up, I should also normally fall in love with a man.

That’s why, I’m not abnormal.

Back then, I was still a young girl afraid of various things.

But, a person cannot stay a child forever.

Soon after, I came to realize that.