Christopher
Alec is kissing me back! Kissing. Me. Back. Pulling me closer! Am I dreaming?
Did I die?
Alec's lips slowly soften against mine. Hesitantly, I try to mold my lips to his. The rush of his scent, sweet chocolate and cream, clouds my consciousness. The hands tugging on my shirt offer me encouragement.
His skin is a hot brand beneath my hands. I cup his face fully, tilting it to align my eager sips at his intoxicating taste.
The brush of his nose against my cheek, the moisture building on our lips, the pauses in between his breaths, each one more irregular and unsteady than the last; all driving me to madness.
My pulse beats frantically in my ears. Blood sings through my body. Adrenaline surging.
Tilting my head back, I suck at Alec's mouth, never wanting to lose contact with this taste, and I open my eyes. His eyelashes rest gently closed but visible heat is rising in his cheeks. The sight is enough to take my breath away.
Sliding one hand around the nape of his neck, I anchor his face towards mine. I reach around his waist to pull him even closer. His hands catch on my shoulders, our chests pressing closer together.
His eyes drift open, the red surging higher on his cheeks. Our eyes lock and his pupils are large and focused on me. Watching his reaction, I purposefully slide my tongue out, licking at his bottom lip, and I can feel a small shudder along his spine in time with the movement.
I trace over the same spot again with my tongue, pushing a little further, exploring and asking for more. His lips part on a small breath. Together we both push forward. His eyes shut tightly but his tongue welcomes me in, tangling and twisting with mine. I let myself get swept away in it.
Pulling him ever harder against me, his arms twine behind my neck, forcing him to arch towards me. I slide my foot forward, my leg presses against his body and he takes a smaller step back. His hands and mouth and heat still pull at me. Another step. His hips rise a little as he bumps into the desk.
Gripping him tighter, I continue to press towards his body. I want to line our bodies up with no separation. I want to push him down and taste every inch I can reach. I want more.
When his face pulls back from mine I blindly follow, trying to taste him more. Until I feel his hand settle against my chest, halting me. I have to open my eyes again and see him leaning back, one arm outstretched to me and the other holding him up against the desk. I can still feel our legs pressed against each other.
His brilliant red face is turned slightly away from mine, his eyes looking behind him. His mouth slightly swollen and red. Behind him, a mess of papers and office supplies are still settling on the floor. We must have knocked it off but I didn't even hear it.
Alec tries to push harder against me and I hurry to release him and step back. He falters a little before finding his balance and awkwardly pushes up from the desk.
A million different expressions seem to flutter over his face and he can't seem to bring his eyes to look at me. Stalking over behind the desk, I crouch down and start gathering up the mess, giving both of us some time. Slowly, the heat starts to dissipate from my own cheeks. Glancing up, Alec has his hands over his face.
"I was definitely not ready for that." My keen hearing picks up the words Alec whispers to himself.
Damn. I got carried away.
I practically flew here. Wolfing out as soon as our group reached the pack house coming home. Before the van had even come to a complete stop, I was racing here.
My body is no longer my own these days. The longer I was away from Alec I felt tight. Anxious. Nervous. Insane. My wolf instincts were starting to own me.
I was a mess as the trip got longer. I messed up at council meetings, forgetting things as soon as they were talked about. I could only gnaw at the thought of being with Alec again.
I'd long ago stored clothes before the edge of the woods leading to the vet's office, since Alec doesn't like it when I don't wear shoes. I struggled into the clothes today, too excited. The long, field grass might as well have been a fast running stream, pulling at every step trying to get here.
The familiar scents spurred me on, leading me forward. When I opened the door, Alec looked like an angel. His hair was slightly out of place. His shirt was tucked in but rumpled from working all day. And his scent! The breeze that through came the door with me, swirled it all around me. His rich scent set my every nerve on fire.
I tried. I tried to hold back. I don't really know what he said. I don't really know what I said. I had only the urge to put some claim on him.
"I'm sorry." I apologize to his back, still crouched on the floor. I apologize for the mess, for the kiss, for my raging hormones...the list goes on.
Standing up, I set the disturbed mess of papers back on the desk. Watching Alec, he never responds to me. Slowly, his shoulders relax. Even with how small and slim Alec is, he always looks so capable to me. He carries himself with a determined inner strength.
Alec takes his hands down from his face. From what I can see, most of the red has gone from his ears and neck. His shoulders rise on a deep breath before Alec turns around to face me. His eyes look at mine but they drift down to my lips before jerking to a point over one of my shoulders.
"Don't-don't worry about those." He gestures at the papers. "Let's, um, let's talk outside." Turning to the door, he immediately trips over his bag that must have fallen sometime during our kiss. Stepping around the desk, I put my hand out to steady him but he waves me off. "I'm fine! I'm fine."
Quickly snatching up the bag, Alec gathers the strap around it and places it on the desk with everything else. "L-let's go."
Without looking at me, Alec heads out the door. I follow at a slower pace. He takes quick steps down the path leading to the back of the clinic. The shadows are longer here, casting over the field with the last rays of sunlight filtering through the distant trees. The sky overhead is already turning a dark blue.
Alec stops, facing the woods, and I carefully walk up to stand next to him. He doesn't turn to face me, but I glance over enough to watch him try and calm down.
I'm not sure it's the right move but I slowly reach out and wrap my wrist around Alec's. Giving him plenty of time to pull back, I slide my fingers down his palm until his fingers are aligned with mine.
I can hear Alec take a deep breath but slowly, achingly slowly, he slides his fingers in between mine. Taking that for permission, I wrap my hand around his, our fingers intertwined. Alec still won't look at me but I see him glance down at our hands before looking back up to the darkening sky.
I could stand like this forever but even after Alec seems to calm down, he doesn't turn to look at me. And worse, he doesn't say anything.
Come on, Christopher. Are you a man or a mouse? You can speak up first!
"Are you mad at me?" I finally ask.
"Yes."
Shit. Alec looks at me and whatever form of panicked expression that's on my face right now.
"No." He sighs a little and changes his answer. "Not about...that...just now," nodding to the clinic.
The air starts moving through my lungs again. "Then...?"
"I answered like that because...I didn't know when you- when I was going to see- where- oh never mind!" Jaw tight, Alec looks away again.
"Because I was gone?" My question goes unanswered. "I'm sorry, Alec."
Rubbing my thumb over the back of Alec's hand, I try to soothe him. "I didn't really think about telling you in time. Plus, I'd already pushed you with my feelings. I was scared to-"
"Yeah." Alec cuts me off. After a pause, his fingers squeeze mine just a little. "I understand."
"Alec?" I wait for him to turn and face me fully. It takes some time, but he gets there. His eyes gleam in the faint light, his beautiful features accentuated in the shadows.
"Yeah?"
"Can we talk about...how involved...you'll let me be? I mean, with you?"
"Yes." He says firmly. "We need to do that. I know that, " he trails off hesitantly, "but I don't understand what you...want."
I want to love you forever.
"I want to date you! I want to take you out as my boyfriend and get to know all about you. I want to go as far as you'll let me." The words rush out, my heart pounding as if this is the only chance I'll have.
Alec's eyes widened slightly while the rest of his features seem to have frozen. Looking fazed, he nods slightly and slowly turns his face forward again. All I can do is try and calm myself down and wait for him to be ready.
Night drifts over us, the sky completely dark with stars starting to show, before Alec finally does talk again.
"I want to try it. For a little while."
"A little while?" That stings. Did he just get swept away in the moment earlier? Does he still not think I'm sincere with him?
"I just want to have a chance to evaluate this, before it gets too far. I want to know that I, that we, can step back if it's not right."
Without letting go of him, I step in front of Alec, blocking out everything in his sight but me. His face looks calm but I can see the worry in his eyes. I carefully lift the hand within mine and place it on my chest. Spreading Alec's fingers out, I let him feel my heart beat against his palm.
"If that's what you need. But I promise, Alec, I'll make sure you never want to step back from me. Not in a little while. Never."
Alec's eyes are hooked on me. Unblinking. Unsure.
Raising my other hand, I hold both of mine over his still covering my heart.
"I promise."
A/N: Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. I got another one donee!