Alec
Ahhh! That pervert picked out my underwear too!
Silently holding in my scream, I scrunch up the pair of boxers pulled from my bundle of clean clothes. I already feel like my skin is flayed off, after all the scrubbing to get rid of the dried sweat and blood. I just glare at the garment. In the end I have to put the clothes on, getting dressed in whatever Christopher had handed me back at my apartment.
The shower didn't calm me down so much as having the time in a room to myself did. I needed space alone without the presence of everyone who was causing me stress. I tried to let the steady stream pummel the remaining echo of Christopher's voice in my head, out of my head.
Pulling on the last of my clothes and buttoning my shirt, I feel as if I have to make a decision. Do I believe them all? Werewolves, talking into each other's minds, being a freaking pack of wolves? Or do I not believe it? Maybe I should just bide my time, pretend to play along, until I can get out of here?
Putting my hand on the doorknob, I hesitate. I stare blankly at the closed door in front of me. I take a deep breath. It's okay, I remind myself. I am going to hear Christopher out for now at least.
Leaving the bathroom, taking the small hallway to the living... area? I am not sure, Christopher's room looks more like a small apartment than a bedroom. When we first walked in the space was crowded with furniture pushed against furniture. I recognized it as the furniture that Christopher had purchased for me without my permission.
Huge recliner, dressers and a large, comfy looking mattress, all pushing up against a long sofa and matching end tables. The walls were crowded with bookshelves filled up from top to bottom with a stacked-together mess of books. I almost missed seeing the small kitchenette off to the side and the hallway leading to the bath and bedroom.
Christopher must have pushed the mattress and extra furniture off to one side while I was showering, leaving him room to now pace in front of the sofa. Stopping and turning when I join him, he is again wearing that annoying smile.
Except... Now that I'm not freaking out one hundred percent, his eyes look strained and worried. This must not be much easier for him either, me finding out.
Christopher clears his throat. "Um, how are you?"
Soundlessly my mouth opens but I don't know how to answer that, so I close my mouth with a shrug.
"Do you want to sit down?" He gestures to the sofa.
Nodding with more confidence than I feel, I sit down gingerly. Christopher also sits down opposite me. My eyes look at everything around the room except him.
"Do-" Christopher stops and clears his throat again. "Do you have any questions?"
I look over at him sitting lightly on the edge of the cushion. "Christopher, I'm here already. And I'm willing to listen. Why are you still so nervous? Is there something else worse going on?"
"No! No, it's just that..." Christopher's hands tighten on his lap. "Are you going to dump me!?"
Wide-eyed, I stare at him, once again without an answer. He silently watches me, determined to get an answer. "I, uh, I'm not going to make any decisions right now. About anything, I just, I just need to understand everything first."
Nodding slightly, Christopher takes a deep breath, after blowing it out he looks a little more like the Christopher I'm familiar with. "Okay, that's fair. Thank you."
"Mm-hmm."
"Is there something...that you want to know first?"
"Um, there were a lot of...people downstairs. Are they all, you know?"
"We just call ourselves werewolves. It's not quite right in the traditional sense but it is the simplest." Christopher sits back a little more against the back of the sofa while speaking. "Most of the people you saw, and most of us here, are werewolves. Some of the spouses are human."
Nodding, I take a steady breath in and out before asking, "Do you ALL live here?"
"No, a lot live in the pack house here but it's usually not full like this. The houses we passed earlier are homes to a lot of individual families. Some of us also live in town, if it's easier for them. We don't have strict rules but we all like and need to stay close together."
"Need to?"
"Hmm, it's not too serious but a single werewolf usually suffers without others around it. Might be a mental thing or not, you can ask Dr. Crane any of these questions if I don't answer them well enough, too." I remember that Dr. Crane told me that he did veterinary school after medical. I wonder if there was a werewolf specialty at university I was unaware of?
"And, when do you, um, when you all-" Deep breath. "When do all of you change into wolves!?" I manage to spit out.
"Um, about that, we can actually change, we call it shifting, anytime, all the time, I guess." Christopher rushed on, "it's not like we have to shift. We can pretty much keep either form for any amount of time."
"No full moon?"
"No full moon."
I worked on wrapping my head around that. I picture the large, wolf- Christopher laying in the field. It wasn't sunset yet and I have no idea where we are at in the moon's cycle anyway. I've seen Christopher on and off over the past couple of months, days, evenings, sometimes after dark, always in a human form. Like I would have considered him to be in any other form. But what he is saying is at least in-line with what I've seen, I suppose.
Wait! "Dee, too?" Reed...I can see it. But Dee?
Christopher chuckles a little. "Yes. Dee, too."
"But she, she seems so- so normal!" Christopher sits up a little, quirking an eyebrow at me. "Not- not that you're not normal!" I backpedal. "It's just that Dee is so sweet and...nurturing."
Christopher nods in understanding. His hand raises toward me, as if he was going to hold my hand or console me. He stops quickly and pulls his hand back, settling it back on his own knee before continuing. "I mean, we are human, too. Also, wolves are also nurturing. Any of our human qualities that are combined with our wolf traits are just going to make that stronger."
I consider that point for a little while. "Okay, I have a dumb question."
Christopher leans forward gesturing for me to go ahead. I can tell that he's more relaxed the more questions I am asking.
"Do wolves, like, actual, actual wolves do that- that talking thing, in their minds?" I point to my own head.
"Um," Christopher pauses to think. "I never really thought about it. I mean, we just think of wolves as, you know, animals."
Unbelievable. "Then what about you, what are werewolves?"
"Shifters?"
"What?" They like that term: shift. It seems too tame for what I've witnessed.
"Shifters are humans that turn into animals." It's not the first time Christopher mentioned that he considered them humans.
"Wait! Other animals, too?"
"Oh, sure. Wolf is the most common, there are even other werewolf packs that we interact with regularly. But depending on the region there would be other animals."
"'Oh, sure' he says." I mumble before remembering he can probably hear me. Leveling a look at Christopher, "Okay. Tell me now. What else is real?"
"What do you-"
"Vampires?"
"I- I don't kno-"
"Goblins? Leprechauns? Little garden fairies?"
"Alec," Christopher holds up a hand to stop me. "I have no idea. I don't believe any of those things are real. I just know about us."
"Okay, okay." Waving my hand at him. Blowing out a breath, I try to arrange my thoughts and find my next question.
"Are you disappointed?" Christopher asks, surprising me.
"Disappointed about what?"
"That little garden fairies aren't real-"
"No!" But Christopher still chuckles a little. "Okay, so fairies would be weird but people-wolves that can talk inside minds is normal? My whole understanding of what is possible changed today, let alone normal. Is that funny to you, too?"
"No, not at all. Alec," Christopher scoots a little closer, watching me. He lifts his hand and slowly moves it towards mine, clenched tight on my lap. I could pull away but I don't and his large hand slides over both of mine, gently squeezing. His hand is warm and familiar. "Alec, I am just glad that you are hearing me out and, more importantly, not dumping me."
He's really worried about that but I haven't even had time to think about it. I guess, that means I am dating a...werewolf? That doesn't sound right, but...
"For now." I qualify, after all, I still feel we just started our trial period. "It's only that- I think it's too early to make decisions like that."
Another squeeze on my hands. "Still, thank you."
"But, that- I can't wrap my head around the mind-talking thing."
"You can try talking to me that way, too?"
"What? How?"
"This is also something you'd have to ask Dr. Crane about for more detail but it's something about our DNA that gives us the ability to send and receive thought messages. Since we can send them, we can receive them from anyone."
"But how do you do it?"
"I just think about who I want to hear me and then say it in my mind." Christopher catches my skeptical glance. "It works, trust me."
"Don't you ever hear anything you aren't supposed to?"
"No more than any other verbal conversation. You have to intentionally send your thoughts, they won't just slip out. Like opening your mouth to talk."
"Huh." Maybe that's why werewolves can do it, since they can't use their mouths as wolves. Christopher said that wolf traits joined with human traits make them stronger but maybe it goes both ways?
"Do you want to try it?"
"Me? Now?"
"Only if you want to."
Blowing out a breath, "Okay." I turn to face Christopher, his hand falling away as he matches his body to face mine. "Uh, I have to look at you, right?"
Shaking his head, "No, it's a habit to do that because we usually talk out loud but you don't have to look at the person. We can even be apart, up to a couple of miles."
Damn. Okay, here goes. Thinking hard, I look into Christopher's patient eyes. In my mind I'm picturing us sitting like this but opening my mouth to speak instead. Like this?
Christopher's smile is instantaneous. Yes! Perfect, Alec! His voice booms in my brain, like there is someone else in there.
"Oh, my gosh." I drop my head into my hands, turning away and bracing myself on my knees. It really works! "Oh, no, no, no, no-"
"Alec!?" Christopher moves to crouch in front of me. "Hey, it's okay." His warm hands cover my own, slowly pulling them away from my temples. "Look at me. Are you alright?"
I bring my eyes up to him, reading the concern on his face. "Good," he says slowly, "just breathe. I know it was a lot to take in earlier, I'm sorry. Just breathe."
He breathes in and out slowly with me. It was a shock, I think I had half thought I was mistaken earlier. But, I realize, watching him encourage me with each breath, it's not really so bad. So he can talk in my mind. So he's a wolf. It just doesn't...seem so bad right now.
"I'm alright."
"Good. I'm sorry, why don't we stop and get some rest. You're exhausted."
I shook my head even though he's not wrong. "Actually, I have one more question."
"Anything."
"Can I see you...shift, again?"
Hesitating, Christopher asks, "Are you ready for that?"
Taking one last deep breath, I sit up straighter and meet his eyes. "I don't think I'll fully be comfortable until I see it myself and...understand what I'm seeing."
Christopher's look is covered in doubt but after a moment he agrees. "Okay. But if we need to stop, just tell me, there's no rush."
"I'll be fine." I fucking hope.
Well, then.." Christopher stands up, his hands going to the bottom edge of his tee shirt and starts to pull it up.
"Ahhh, wait," More surprised than anything, I cover my eyes and look away. "Do you have to be naked?"
"Well, we can't undress as wolves and the clothes would rip, so we always do it nude."
Oh, my lord. "Okay, um, I hadn't considered that. Um-" I don't know that I am ready to see Christopher in all his untogether, even without the whole wolf transformation. I mean, Christopher fully clothed is already...quite a sight.
"Oh, hang on." Looking past my fingers I see Christopher stretch out one side of his shirt's collar and glance down. "I should probably get cleaned up first." Christopher turns and hurries towards the bathroom.
Fully uncovering my eyes, I am left to wait. The muted sound of the shower turns on. Feeling unsettled, I stand and pace back and forth, following Christopher's earlier path. My thoughts keep circling around.
Werewolves. Shifting. Mind-reading. Before any of my thoughts can land, the shower turns off. In a short time, Christopher comes back out, a large towel wrapped around his waist, hair dripping damp.
Quite a bit of him is still left bare. I can feel my eyeballs staring but everywhere I move them there is more. More of Christopher's muscular arms and shoulders, his broad chest and thickly toned torso. I was shy to look before but now I can't seem to look away.
As he walks towards me, a wide patch of smooth skin stands starkly in the middle of his curling, blond chest hair. I take the last steps to stand in front of him, raising a hand, hesitantly hovering above the center of Christopher's chest. Above the smooth skin exposed in the same size and shape that I had shaved into the wolf for surgery.
"Um, Alec...?" I hear the question in Christopher's voice.
"Is this where it was?" I try to picture the wound I dealt with earlier but can't quite seem to imagine it here on Christopher's strong and healthy chest.
"Yes."
"But there's...no mark."
Christopher takes my hand and presses it to his chest, startling me to look up, his eyes warm and intense. "I heal fast." The skin underneath my hand is incredibly warm. Beneath my fingers beats a strong pulse. Flustered, I pull my hand away and look away, the loss of the heat makes my palm itch.
My throat is suddenly dry, all I can do is nod as I step back a little. When I settle my nerves a little and look back at Christopher he is waiting patiently for me. He gives me a small, encouraging smile. I see him take a deep breath, his eyes never leaving mine. And he begins to change.
It seems even faster this time. Fur takes over skin. Christopher's entire form bends eerily out of shape before snapping. He falls towards the floor and lands four paws. A wild and fierce wolf stands in that spot, still watching me.
It really happened!
The wolf takes a step forward, then another, bumping his wet nose into my limp hand. Kneeling slowly, I lower myself down until I am level with him. My hand reaches out on its own, lightly brushing the fur around his face. Around Christopher's face.
"How?" I breathe. Exploring the dark, rough fur, I run my hands in longer strokes. Some of the fur is damp still. Instead of answering, Christopher lightly pushes the top of his head against my forehead.
His scent is different, not Christopher's but an animal's. Everything, his ears, his muzzle, the sharp eyes, were all wolf. "It really is you."
Christopher patiently sits down in front of me, seemingly at ease while I pet him. Feeling my hand down his chest, I graze the shaved patch of fur with no sign of the earlier wound. His breathing is steady and the pulse, the same one I felt a few moments ago, beats strongly.
A healed, healthy Christopher sits here but my eyes can still see the shuddering mass that I found behind my clinic.
"I called you, you know, in the field. I tried to call you to come and help me."
Christopher's large wolf head leans into my chest, pushing close. I'm sorry.
His voice in my mind startles me but I wrap myself closer, stretching my arms around this new form. I shut my eyes tight as they start to sting and fill, I sink my face into his fur.
It's really you.
A/N: So. Much. Dialogue. But thought it was necessary. Alec still has a lot more questions...