"All right, I want you to attack me." Ash said calmly, as they started their training for the day.
"No." Ellis said shaking her head.
"Excuse me?" Ash asked, his voice dangerously low. Adam watched them both carefully from the side. He knew better than to interfere, but that did not mean he was not worried. Especially since he knew what Ellis was planning.
"I want you to teach me how to get away from someone after they have grabbed me." Ellis stated calmly.
"No." Ash said coldly, deliberately, when he was done cursing.
"Why not?" Ellis challenged. "That's where I am weak. I can attack you head on. I can even fight you off. Teach me what I don't know."
"If you can land even one hit on me in a head on attack, then I will teach you." Ash told her, but his face was expressionless, all his usual teasing gone. His eyes glittered with a strange anger.
Ellis attacked. She tried everything she could, but he evaded her. She could not even land a single hit on him., until she was completely exhausted. She could feel tears of frustration pricking her eyes but she refused to let them fall as she glared at Ash.
"You're good for a civilian, but don't forget that I hold back with you. I need you to be able to fight me as an equal before I am teaching you anything else." Ash said, back in instructor mode.
"I need to learn, Ash." Ellis snapped, but she knew that in truth she was pleading. Ash knew it too.
He walked forward, and simply stood behind her. Ellis tried to turn to keep him in her sight, but he placed his palms on both sides of her head to keep it in place.
"How much can you force yourself to trust me?" he asked her, his voice harsh.
Ellis felt cold at his touch, hated the feeling of having him at her back like this. She swallowed but did not say anything.
Ash came to stand in front of her again.
"That's what I thought. You don't trust me one bit Ellis. You could not even recognize me last night. If I grab you, it would not serve any purpose, but scare you more. You're not ready for that. Adam can't teach you, coz either he won't scare you, or if he does, it would horrify you on an entirely different level. I just need a little bit more time to win some of your trust and then I will teach you whatever you want to learn." Ash said quietly.
Ellis looked at him, stunned by his brutal honesty, and she realized what she was seeing in his eyes. He truly cared for her.
"I do trust you. Just a little." Ellis muttered.
Ash chuckled. "Smart of you. I am an untrustworthy person and we both know it. Now enough for today." He turned around to leave, and Ellis landed a perfect kick on his back, making him sprawl face first on the floor. Ash rolled over to glare at her.
"What was that for?" he snapped.
"I landed a hit." she said quietly.
Ash just stared at her, before he jumped back to his feet.
"You stubborn fool." he snarled. Ellis just stared back at him, her mouth set in a mulish line.
Ash took a deep breath and when he let it out, it seemed as if all the anger went out with the air. He immediately became half as scary to Ellis as he was mere seconds ago. Then he advanced towards Ellis, purposely keeping himself non threatening.
"Don't try to soften it." Ellis said.
"Shut up." Ash told her pleasantly.
He did not move behind her, but rather came to stand right in front of her, and suddenly grabbed both her wrists in his hand.
"Free yourself." he commanded, yet his tone was oddly gentle.
Ellis tried to struggle, only to realize that he had positioned their bodies in such a way that she could barely use any strength. She fought, but it was no use, and a dull throbbing started in her already abused arm that had yet to heal completely from being broken. She was not even wearing her protector.
Ash could see her weakening physically, but it was her mental state that he was more worried about. Still he knew better than to think that she would give up.
He suddenly yanked her forward and twisted her around, so that her back was now pressed to his chest, and his arm was a steel band across her body, holding her wrists. He carefully cupped her face with his other hand, and made her look at Adam.
"Concentrate on Adam. Nothing else. Only him, and your breathing. Forget about breaking free for a moment. If you hyperventilate, you will never get free. Just breathe." he instructed. He could feel her struggling to do as she was told, and he could see the tension singing through Adam's body, but he never moved, and he never said a word.
Slowly, Ellis forced her breathing to a steadier pace. She leaned heer head back untl it was resting on Ash's shoulder, his cheek pressed to her temple.
"Good. Now do you feel stronger, since you are getting more oxygen?" Ash asked.
Ellis nodded, still not trusting herself to speak. She might have evened her breathing, but Ash was supporting a lot of her weight. Without him she would have collapsed right now. It was only in this moment she realized that she trusted him far more than she had initially thought.
"Okay. Now, if you struggle, or squirm, it'll be hard to get away from someone stronger than you. What attack points can you go for?" Ash asked, his voice calm, almost soothing.
"Groin if I can kick back, or face." Ellis answered.
"Yes. Try my face." Ash told her and she tried to smash her head back and hit his face.
He avoided it easily by moving his head to the side.
"It'll work, but only if it is unexpected. Now here is what you can do in this situation that ought to work most times." Ash said. Then he showed her how to twist around, and smash her knee up, and throw her opponent over her shoulder at the same time.
"With this, you should get out of the hold of whoever is dumb enough to be holding you. I am not taking one for the team, so you are not allowed to practice this one on me." Ash told her, before he carefully released her and stepped away. Ellis simply collapsed into a sitting position on the mats and stared up at him; then she smiled.
"Thanks Ash." She said brightly. Ash sighed.
"Right. Don't push me like this Ellis. I am not a very nice person." he told her seriously. Ellis shook her head.
"I know, but you won't lose your temper with me." she said with a confidence he did not feel.
Ash ran his hand through his hair, feeling frustrated, before he finally shrugged.
"I'm going home." he told her, and walked out of the basement, not even bothering to take a shower at their place today.
...
"C'mon, get up Ellis." Adam said as he came to stand in front of her, and extended his hand. Ellis placed her hand in his large one. She was shaking like a leaf in a storm.
Adam pulled her up.
"He's right. You are a stubborn fool." He told her, even as he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close into a hug.
"But he taught me." Ellis said quietly, pressing her face into his shirt and breathing him in.
Adam started to lead her out of the basement. "You left him no choice. He hated it Ell. Last night, he did not show it but he was devastated when you did not recognize him. I think he'd have been happier to get shot as Ash, rather than have been unharmed as some stranger to you. I believe seeing fear for himself in your eyes hurt him as much as it would have hurt me."
"Why didn't you tell me this before?" Ellis asked softly. They had reached the ground floor.
"Because this is what you wanted. You would still have done it, you would have just felt guiltier doing it." Adam answered simply.
"Yes." Ellis answered, and hating herself for it. "I also realized that I trust him far more than I thought. His voice managed to soothe me when he was holding me hostage. Seeing you helped a lot too."
Adam shook his head, and picked her up.
"You better talk to him later." he told her, carrying her to their bath.
Ellis lightly kissed his neck. "Later."
...
Ash ran on the treadmill, willing himself to go faster and faster. He needed to do something to get this feeling of restlessness out of his system. When the run did not help, he jumped off from the treadmill, and pulled off his sweat soaked t-shirt, throwing it on a chair.
He stalked over to his terrace garden and stared out at the city around him. He lived in one of the most expensive high rises in the city, and so although it was a one bedroom flat, it still had more than enough space for him.
There was always a breeze on the 20th floor, and Ash could not help but smile as he felt it's chill on his bare skin. It had been two hours since he had finished training with Ellis, and usually he would still be at their house, just finishing lunch. As it was, the very thought of food made him feel faintly sick.
He turned away from the view and decided to go for a swim in the common pool of the building. It was a weekday afternoon. He should have it to himself.
He dressed in a pair of swimming trunks, grabbed his house keys, phone and a towel, and headed downstairs.
Just as he had thought, there was no one in the pool. Ash did ten laps, before climbing out, and stretching out on one of the deck chairs, letting the hot sunlight soak into him. He did not want a tan. He already had one. He just felt cold, though he knew it had nothing to do with the water.
He closed his eyes and was almost asleep when his phone rang. He answered it without checking to see who it was. He should have checked.
"Hey." Ellis said in greeting.
Ash stilled. "Hello Ellis." he finally answered.
"Ummm..." Ellis started and then seemed to be at a loss for words. Ash sighed.
"You're forgiven." He told her.
"I know." she answered, and he chuckled.
"Arrogant brat."
"Can I come see you?" Ellis asked.
"You feel up to getting out of the house?" Ash asked, surprised.
"If it's you." Ellis replied, and Ash's heart started beating a painful rhythm.
"Do you know where I live?" he asked her.
"No."
"Do you feel like swimming? Or sun bathing?"
"Uhhh.. please tell me you don't live on the beach like a hippie." Ellis said, sounding worried.
"I don't. I do have a private pool though, with deck chairs. We can stay by the pool or go up, whichever you prefer when you get here. Adam can bring you." Ash told her, grinning now despite his earlier sour mood.
"Okay." Ellis said and hung up.
...
When Ellis showed up an hour later, Adam was nowhere in sight. Ash raised an eyebrow at her, even as she sat down on the deck chair next to his. She was wearing light brown cotton shorts and white cotton shirt. She promptly took off the shirt to reveal a white bikini top and lay back on the chair to sunbathe.
"No sunscreen?" Ash asked.
"I already put it on at home." she responded.
They were silent again for a while, until Ellis turned her head to look at him. He had his eyes closed, but his head was angled in her direction.
"Thanks Ash." she said quietly.
"You're gonna have to be more specific than that." He said, without opening his eyes. Ellis sighed. He was going to be difficult. She turned around until she was lying on her stomach, her head pillowed on her hands, staring at his face.
"For caring enough about me that you tried to come near me last night. Thanks for agreeing to my selfishness this morning. Thanks for being my friend." Ellis said.
"Idiot." Ash told her, and she chuckled, but he could feel an edge of sadness in it.
"I do trust you, you know." she murmured. "Even I didn't realize it, until you were holding me. It was not just seeing Adam that helped me calm down. It was also hearing your voice."
"You sure?" Ash asked quietly, and Ellis knew that it meant a lot to him that she answer truthfully.
"I think... that if I ever snap again, like I did yesterday, you might be able to bring me out of it. Physical presence is scary to me, even yours to some extent, but I trust your voice completely. So if you were to just talk to me, wearing something bullet proof, of course, then I will be able to recognize you." She answered honestly.
"Good." Ash said, finally opening his eyes and treating her to one of his dazzling grins. Then he sat up, and his grin vanished as if it had never been there, replaced by a grimace.
"Ash?" Ellis asked, starting to sit up, but he placed a hand on her shoulder.
He was staring at her back, and belatedly Ellis realized that she had bared it in the full glare of sunlight.
Ash switched spots, until he was sitting on her deck chair, his waist brushing hers, but he did not seem to notice.
He lightly ran his fingers over her back, and Ellis looked away. Adam had seen her at her worst. He had seen the wounds, so it had never occurred to her to hide the scars from him, but being so open with him was the reason she had made this mistake with Ash now. After all, he had never seen her wounded, and unless in direct sunlight, the scars on her body did not show, thanks to plastic surgery.
"I'm sorry. I forgot that even after plastic surgery they showed up in bright sunlight. I should not have taken the shirt off..." Ellis mumbled, trying again to sit up, but his grip on her shoulder tightened and he pushed her deeper into the chair.
"Stop, please." Ash said, and she stilled. "I thought I knew what you had gone through. I thought I had a right to be hurt last night when you did not recognize me. I'm sorry Ellis. After what those animals did to you, it's a miracle that you trust as much as you do. I will never again be as foolish as I have been." he said and his voice was ragged.
His fingers were still tracing the scars on her back, but she did not mind his touch, not anymore. There were no ulterior motives behind the butterfly touch, and she trusted him.
"It.." Ellis stopped. What was she going to say? It didmatter, and it was not okay. But she did not like hearing his voice like this.
"You've not been foolish." she finally said.
"No?" he asked, his fingers stilling for a moment, before continuing to stroke her.
"No." Ellis said firmly.
"All right." He answered, and she knew that this topic was now closed.
Then he tugged on the string of her bikini, and opened it.
"What are you doing?" Ellis growled, tensing.
"Giving you a massage. All your muscles are knotted." Ash answered nonchalantly.
Ellis forced herself to relax again, as his hands started working the muscles of her back. He had been right, the muscles were knotted, and even the bath earlier had not helped a lot.
"Adam should be doing this regularly." Ash said calmly, as he pressed her lower back.
"He used to." Ellis answered, too relaxed right now to care about much.
"Tell him to start again." Ash ordered.
"Mmm hummm. " Ellis mumbled, and he chuckled.
"You're like a kitten you know that? You have sunlight, and your fur is being petted. That's all you need." Ash teased. Ellis stared to turn to glare at him, only to realize that the bikini would slide off if she did. She squeaked and turned back, while Ash snickered.
"Jerk." Ellis grumbled.
Ash pressed his thumbs into her back, and she could not keep a sigh of pure pleasure from slipping out.
"You sure I am a jerk?"
"Useful jerk." she amended.
"Ah yes. Of course." Ash murmured, but then he was silent, and the sure strokes of his hands lulled Ellis into sleep. When he was done, Ash simply tied back her bikini strings, and turned her around. She looked so innocent when asleep. Also, she had given him irrefutable proof that she did indeed trust him. Before today, the only one she trusted enough to fall asleep around, was Adam.
He stroked the curve of her cheek, and smiled. She trusted him. She had no idea how much that meant to him, and she never would. He would be her friend, maybe even her closest friend, but that would be all he would ever allow himself to be.
Ash would be the best friend, Adam would be the lover, and all would be right in Ellis's world. He'd make damn sure of it.