What Have We Become

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As we arrived, I saw my dad's car in the driveway. I felt a jolt of fear run through me as I ran to open the front door. I saw my father and Dennis furiously arguing with my mom nowhere to be seen.

Without thinking, I shoved myself in between them begging for them to stop. I needed to end this fight before it became violent.

With my body acting as a barrier in between them I exclaimed, "STOP," realizing my previous pleas weren't enough. They both looked at me, but my olive eyes were fixated on my dad.

"Leave our family alone." I declared to him strongly, but without raising my voice. To which he replied, "I just want to talk to your mother."

Denny gritted his teeth and retorted, "So you can hit her again. Trust me, she doesn't want to see you," and he pushed our father with me still amid them. I urged him to discontinue this argument and leave. I threatened him by saying if he didn't, I would call the police if it became necessary.

He answered back, "I'm your dad, I mean you no harm." I wanted to believe him, but I couldn't be sure.

Looking into my dad's eyes I knew that I couldn't risk it, "Maybe one day I'll believe that, but now I can't." I looked in the doorway and my eyes linked with Jay's. I finished by saying, "Jay, please call the police."

We watched as Jay pulled out his phone to dial those three life-changing numbers when we heard my mom say, "Wait!" She dashed down the stairs.

"You want to talk, I'll talk. Kids go upstairs." My mom pointed to our rooms.

Denny refused and so did I. "There is no way we're leaving you alone together."

My mom crossed the floor over to us. With a kiss on our foreheads, she reminded us that she can take care of herself. Adhering to her wish I ran upstairs, tears spilling onto my face. I heard Jay following me.

"Son please," was the last thing I heard before the sounds of my cries filled my head. Of course, it took Denny more persuasion, but I knew that eventually, he'll stomp up the stairs as well.

Jay held me as I cried, and I was so tired of crying. I didn't know what to do with myself or if I even could do anything. With time, my cries turned into a soft sniffle.

Bringing me out of my crappy thoughts, I heard Jay say, "Did you know that most American car horns honk in the key of F."

I giggled at his remark and answered, "Wow, thanks for the stupid car fact of the day. Let me guess, same time tomorrow," with a small smile on my lips.

"Hey, it's true," Jay, gushed with a laugh as he kissed the top of my head.

Jay made me smile like no one else could and I was so grateful for him. Through my laughs, I suddenly spat out, "I love you," not knowing or caring if I meant that as a friend or something else.

Taking my face in his hands he leaned in, making me tense up. I thought his lips were coming for mine, but instead, their destination was my forehead. I chuckled in relief and we cloaked ourselves around each other in a hug.

Deep in his loving touch, he whispered in my ear, "I love you, too," causing me to smile and wonder how he meant that. We sat for a few minutes and watched TV, but I was still hungry.

Jay, however, had a brilliant plan to sneak out and eat at his house. I gladly accepted. I needed to leave this house and all the emotional baggage of my day behind me. But first I needed to quench my suspicion over the conversation that was happening a mere 30 feet away from me.

Quietly as an angel in a graveyard, we stealthily crept into the hallway and eavesdropped on a conversation I knew could be detrimental to me. But I had to know. I wouldn't be able to slumber peacefully with an overbearing fear of the unknown surrounding me. We sat on the top step of the staircase and held onto the railing.

All I could hear were faint whispers and the ache of my heart pounding out of my chest from nervousness. I didn't know what to expect or if even my lowest expectations could have a decent outcome.

"Come on, we need to get closer," Jay told me in a hushed voice. Without being heard, we got down to the bottom of the stairs and those faint whispers turned into audible words right in front of me.

My mom pleaded. "No Samuel, I would love for you to start a new relationship with your children, but they need time to heal. It hasn't even been a day since they found out. You have to understand that."

"I know that Terra. You might not believe it, but I'm not an idiot. You can't keep me from my children," my dad expressed raising his whisper.

"The last thing I want to do is keep you from-," My mom tried to speak but she was rudely cut off by him banging his hand on the countertop.

"No, you want to keep them away from me so you don't have to see me! I won't t let you do this to me!" And with that he seized my mother's wrist, tightening his grip on her It was a final attempt to get his feelings across.

My mother questioned as she tried to relieve his grip, "Samuel, what've you become?"

I wanted to move, but I couldn't. Fear had overtaken me, and I was frozen in place. What has my life become?

"Day, we have to go," Jay whispered as he held my hand and directed me back to my room. My body was shaking, and my heart was pulsating. My fear did a 180 turn into anger.

I forced myself back up the stairs and into the safety of my bedroom but I wasn't anywhere safe. Jay locked the door behind me as I was gasping for breath and pacing around the room.

Everything was different now, I saw the abuse with my own eyes and there was no going back.

"I don't know what to do. What can I do? We have to help her, don't we? I would be a terrible daughter if I didn't. I can't believe he would do this. God, save me," I mumbled as I found myself still pacing, despite my want to sit down.

From behind me, I felt two comforting arms wrap around me to calm my rapid heartbeat.

"Day, I know you're upset, but we have to go," he glumly said to me as I felt my breathing calm.

Shaking, I said, "I can't leave her. She's my mom, Jay."

I turned around in his arms and as we made eye contact. I saw tears welling in his eyes that mirrored mine. In all the years of our friendship, I could count the number of times I've seen him cry on one hand. Of course, he's cried more than that, but never in front of me.

"One of us has to be the strong one," I recited. This hurt him; this hurt us both. "You're right; I want to be as far from here as possible."

I wasn't planning on coming back so I caught hold of my bag and grabbed his hand. I headed towards the outside world, the fear of the inside within me. We climbed over my daybed, out the window and the first thing I saw was the light of the full moon peering through the branches of the tree on the side of my house.

I wanted to move, but my body was compelled to stay in place by the magnificent sight I was beholden to.

It was the most beautiful moment I experienced that day. Being with him and the moon, these two things that have given me safety. At that moment, I knew I would rather be with no one else.

With my eyes on the silver pearl that floats in the sky, I was numb to everything else around me, even the fact that Jay's hand was gradually nearing mine.

The soft caress of his fingers lightly touching mine caused a genuine smile to form on my face. A smile that after the traumatizing event that was my day, surprised me to feel. His gentle touch was the only thing that could capture my attention from the glittering moon.

Hands intertwined, I leaned my head in the crook of his neck, never wanting to leave this second in time. Taking me out of my elation, I heard a knock on my door. My mother's soft voice said, "He's gone. Please come out and talk to me, dear."

Hearing those ten simple words made all thoughts disintegrate from my mind. Thoughtlessly, I felt myself slip off the roof. With a soft ooff, I fell face first into the blanket of snow.

I gathered myself and gave Jay a thumbs-up, to signal I was okay. From above I heard Jay say, "Good landing," causing me to giggle and reply, "Your turn."

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