xiii.

i remember, when i was five, you had kneeled before me so you could match my height and flashed that smile at me like i was the only princess in your fairytale. i remember how i was more interested in superheroes than kings and princes.

"are you a superhero?" i asked. "yes, love." you chuckled. "do you have any superpower?" "i can make you fly." you dramatically feigned proud in your voice. "make me fly."

you put your large hands around my small waist and lifted me as high as you could and kept running and moving in circles. i laughed as the air tickled me. i was flying. you made me fly. you were my superhero.

you finally pulled me down and kissed my forehead. "i love you, princess." i believed you. you did love me. "i love you too."

i remember, when i was seven, you had held my little finger in you hand and taught me how to cross roads.

i remember, when i was nine, i had bruised my knee. you ran your hand over it. you became a magician. you kissed my knee. "i love you, princess." the pain was gone. "i love you too." you kissed my tears away.

i remember, when i was ten, you had put your hand on my shoulder to calm me before my exam. "i love you, princess." "i love you too."

i remember, when i was twelve, you had accidentally touched my chest. i also remember that you had touched certain parts on my back a couple of years before that in the name of reassurance. i also remember that you had once breathed too close to me. so i looked up at you this time.

"i'm sorry, sweetheart." i remember how your eyes weren't sorry. i remember how your smile was anything but sorry.

your hand rested on my belly. "i love you, princess." your hand kept moving south.

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