Aftermath

It was early morning when I got home, not that it mattered much. I hadn’t seen the sun in two days.

I felt so much lighter, although tired as hell. I left my bag in the hallway and went straight to bed.

I fell asleep as soon as my head touched the pillow.

The next morning, I awoke to the smell of coffee. I smiled before I opened my eyes.

It was probably Erik fixing me breakfast. I put my white silk robe on and made my way into the kitchen.

Erik was standing by the stove, flipping pancakes. The sun was shining on him through my kitchen windows, reflecting in his black curls.

He smiled at me when he saw me. It felt like the most beautiful sight I had ever seen.

“Good morning, Gorgeous. I was planning on bringing you breakfast in bed, but I seem to have woken you up,” he said, and came over to give me a kiss.

I wrapped my arms around his waist and breathed in his scent. “I missed you,” I admitted, hugging him hard.

“You okay, Babe?” Erik asked, suddenly sounding worried.

“Are you okay? I killed your brother, Erik,” I almost whispered, placing my forehead against his chest and staring down at the floor.

He put his hand on the back of my head and stroked my hair.

The fire alarm suddenly started to ring.

“Shit!” Erik said and turned the stove off. He mumbled something that made the smoke disappear, and the alarm settled.

“We probably shouldn’t eat that pancake,” he chuckled, referring to the burned pancake in the pan.

I laughed at the accident, but it was short-lived as tears started to fall from my eyes, and my laughter turned into sobs. I couldn’t even remember the last time I cried, but I just felt so overwhelmed.

Erik instantly wrapped his arms around me, which just made me cry even harder.

“What’s wrong? You know I didn’t hold any love for my brother,” Erik said.

“It’s just a lot, and you are too amazing,” I sobbed.

He backed away and dried my tears. “I think you need to sit down, drink some coffee, and eat the pancakes I made you,” he said, now looking a little amused.

I nodded and sat down at the kitchen table, letting Erik serve me coffee and breakfast. I hadn’t realized how hungry I was until I started to eat.

I hadn’t eaten anything since we left the hotel the day before. Erik had put saffron in the pancakes, and they were truly delicious.

“I didn’t have dinner yesterday,” I admitted a little shamefully. “These are amazing,” I added.

Erik poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down with me.

“Really, though, Bella, I’m glad you were the one to do it,” he said.

“Did you already know it was me?” I asked.

My tears had dried, and I felt a little better with food in my tummy.

“Yes, Damion told me,” he said, smiling at me.

“I see. I guess the reaper told him,” I said and sipped on my coffee.

“So I’m guessing you already understand this, but I’m telling you just in case,” Erik started. “Damion doesn’t want anybody to know about his involvement. So the fact that he helped to create an antimagic zone that led to the massacre has to stay an absolute secret,” he explained.

“Yeah, I know,” I sighed in relief. I didn’t want anybody to dig for the truth either.

“I guess in a way, you’re lucky Marcus broke into his daughter’s crypt. There must, however, be something very special about you, for him to save you from the curse of the knife,” Erik said, looking very thoughtful.

“How so?” I asked, confused. Although I had a pretty good idea of why I received special treatment.

“Because the curse wouldn’t just have claimed your life. It would have also turned his daughter back to life,” Erik answered.

I dropped my fork. “Come again?” I said, questioning what I had just heard.

“He chose to save you instead of letting his daughter return to life,” Erik clarified.

I really needed to speak to Damion. I needed to know for sure if I was a reincarnation of Morgana.

I didn’t dare tell Erik about those dreams and flashes that I was sure were memories. I had a strong feeling I needed to keep this to myself.

“What do you know about Morgana? I don’t fully understand why Marcus was so desperate to return her to life. What did he think would happen if he’d succeeded?” I asked out of curiosity.

“I’m not sure how much I should tell you of what I know,” he said with a wink. “But she was a very powerful witch, and I know he hoped she’d seek revenge, and release her wrath, upon the umbra and luci,” he added.

“I see, because they murdered her?” I asked thoughtfully.

Erik nodded.

It wasn’t right, though. In the memory, I saw I was doing some kind of ritual, sacrificing myself, but they had slaughtered her coven.

“Well, anyway. I want to go out for drinks tonight. I miss Ellie and Alex!” I said, looking out over the snow-covered city.

“Are you sure about that? If you’re feeling conflicted, drinking is the last thing you should do,” Erik pointed out.

“Yeeees, I’m sure, I want to get wasted!” I said with a grumpy pout.

“All right, if you say so,” Erik chuckled. He patted me on the shoulder as he got up to go out for a smoke.

I saw I had gotten a text from Louisa as I flipped my phone up.

Louisa

I expect you to be here at the headquarters by six a.m. every day for the next week to help the archivist. I have to punish you in some way to satisfy the other squad leaders. Good job!

I sighed and laughed to myself. It wasn’t that bad of a punishment. She probably didn’t think I deserved punishment at all.

***

I wanted to speak to Damion without anybody knowing about it, and two days later I managed to sneak off when I was finally alone.

I was on the ferry again, on my way to visit Nord Manor. I had never been out in the archipelago in the winter.

But it was as beautiful and serene as always. I chuckled to myself when I approached the manor.

Aurora had decorated all the trees surrounding the building. It was beautiful, but a lot.

Damion was waiting for me as I drove up by the main entrance. I walked straight up to him and embraced him as soon as I’d gotten out of my car.

I felt really happy to see him again. He hugged me back.

“I’m a reincarnation of Morgana, aren’t I?” I asked straight away.

“Do you remember anything?” he asked, still embracing me.

“Yes, I remember you as a child, amongst other things,” I mumbled in reply, unsure of how he’d react.

“Then yes, you are. I could have ended Marcus myself for trying to kill you, but then others might have figured out who you are. Erik, for instance, would have known you are of my family,” Damion explained.

“Erik can’t know?” I asked, confused.

“No, you shouldn’t let anybody know,” Damion answered sternly.

“Are you behind these memories of my past life that have returned to me?” I asked, confused.

“What exactly is it that you remember?” Damion asked skeptically.

“Teaching you to write, celebrating Samhain with you, doing some kind of ritual, and…then the moment I sacrificed myself,” I answered, hesitating on the last bit.

There was more, but I wasn’t sure how much was smart to keep to myself.

“What do you mean you sacrificed yourself?” Damion asked, surprised.

“I wasn’t killed, I sacrificed myself in a ritual to protect you, I think. I told the umbra of the time they couldn’t have my son before I stabbed myself,” I explained with uncertainty.

“You weren’t killed by the umbra?” Damion asked.

I shook my head.

“That changes things,” Damion mumbled.

“So, you know why this is happening? I don’t quite know what to make of it,” I admitted.

Damion laughed.

“I do, but I’m sorry to say I can’t tell you,” he answered.

“Oh,” I said, disappointed.

“But rest assured, even though you only remember me faintly and you look slightly different, you are my mother, and I will always protect you,” Damion told me, looking amused.

He probably figured how strange this all felt for me. I knew the memories had changed me somewhat.

“When you’re eighteen, and learn that you have a thousand-year-old son,” I said while rubbing my temples.

Damion laughed at me again.

“Well, mother, would you like to come inside and join me and my wife for coffee?” Damion asked politely while holding the door open.

“Please just say Bella, it’s just too strange,” I said and chuckled as I entered his home.

The scent of pine and spices was cozy and welcoming. Aurora greeted me as soon as I entered.

She embraced me but said nothing. I guessed she and Damion traded glances.

“Do you prefer gingerbread coffee, or candy cane tea?” she asked as she let go.

“Why not candy cane coffee?” I asked, amused. I looked around.

She had finished decorating for Christmas and had truly outdone herself. I particularly liked the floating, glowing baubles above us.

“That can be arranged!” Aurora said. She wandered off.

“You don’t have to worry about this. Morgana Leroux is someone you were a very long time ago, in a very different life,” Damion said when we entered one of their sitting rooms.

“Yeah, I know. The few memories I’ve seen felt a little alien but still real.”

“Like, my love for you felt very real. It feels real. It’s very confusing,” I said with a sigh. I sat down.

Aurora entered, followed by one of their staff who served us coffee and put down a plate of saffron buns. I smiled at her in appreciation.

“Was it the ritual I did that made you immortal?” I asked when the staff had left.

“What ritual did you do? What did you remember about it?” Damion asked curiously.

“I’m not sure. I had carved runes all over my skin, and then I pretty much just prayed for your protection before I drove the knife through my heart,” I answered.

“What am I hearing?” Aurora asked, wide-eyed.

“Morgana wasn’t killed by the umbra. She ended herself,” Damion informed his wife.

“I’m not sure what kind of ritual it could have been. Carving runes is not common, and unless you can recreate them, it doesn’t tell me much,” he told me, looking troubled.

“Erik told me you chose to save me before your daughter. Why? Shouldn’t your daughter be more important?” I asked suspiciously.

“Erik shouldn’t have told you that, but I guess it’s because he is curious as to why, himself,” Aurora sighed.

“Because that knife shouldn’t exist, yet I haven’t had the heart to destroy it,” Damion explained. “Besides, it only gives her a week among the living. It would be better for her to move on and be reborn, but she’s stubborn. She doesn’t want to forget. Remembering an old life only happens to very few.”

“Am I just lucky or something?” I asked, even though I had a nasty feeling it was bigger than that.

“You shouldn’t ask more questions about the past. Just enjoy your future!” Aurora said, smiling, although her eyes looked a little sad.

“But I really want to know,” I protested, even though I wasn’t sure I really wanted to.

“No, you don’t,” Damion said.

“~Don’t ponder on it,~” he added in the arcane language, and the topic seemed to slip my mind again.

I still knew what I knew, but I couldn’t think about what I didn’t.

“This was some really good coffee,” I said instead.