Chapter 22

𝕾𝖔𝖓𝖌 𝖙𝖔 𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖓 𝖙𝖔: 𝕿𝖎𝖒𝖊𝖑𝖊𝖘𝖘 𝖇𝖞 𝕿𝖆𝖞𝖑𝖔𝖗 𝕾𝖜𝖎𝖋𝖙

***

I looked at the letter from my hands and to the window from where I was. I would always have this warm cup of tea, and gaze on the farther places my sight could land.

The nostalgia of the past never leaves me, the darkness always hugs me but the pain always pierces my heart. The corners of my lips that would lift for no reason stayed adamant.

The soft whispers of the rays became painful to gaze at, and then my hand that started to caress the letter tightened its grip. I used to believe in the word forever until there was no more.

All these times, Henry was suffering and all I could do was tell him how I managed to befriend anyone around me while he was left all alone.

I didn't know he had these things curled up inside his box. If he only sought help, then he wouldn't be able to experience this.

What is Duke Vellitas' planning? I wanted to get an answer to those questions and even if I was eager, I knew my current standing was still useless.

While I trained to have this sword in my hands, despite earning such callouses, I didn't recognize enough power.

"If only I have enough power," I slam the table while I close my eyes. I wanted to feel the warmth of the sun again but no matter what I did, the coldness wouldn't go away.

"M-Milady?" I heard someone utter. I looked beside me. I couldn't see the person. Perhaps, my vision became so foggy that I needed to wipe the warm water when I felt a soft fabric caressing my face.

"Is there any problem?" I see Anna looking concerned over my well-being but I only shook my head with a sad smile.

"Could you stay here for a second and lend me your shoulders, Anna?" I asked and she never hesitated to do what I said without asking me.

For that briefest second, I felt peace, but I never knew that the peace would come short, after reminiscing about Henry. I cried on Anna's shoulders all day, and even though the invitation was ruined, I couldn't care less.

I knew Claudius would be the one offering me his handkerchief, but right now, Anna did because I just couldn't bear the thought of Henry being in more pain than before.

"Anna, why do people have to feel hurt?"

That day, I knew Anna was sincere with her words. Night came and Claudius was kneeling while I turned my back to look at the huge window from my room.

It would seem peaceful, and simple that a knight was only taking an oat for his lady, but we both know what was real.

"Vestia, I, swear upon my name that you bestowed, I would bring Henry back no matter what happens," he uttered those words without any regrets, but I did. I couldn't help biting my lower lip enough to stop the water from streaming down my face.

I held a knight's sword and said my words. When all was done, Claudius stood in front of me and wiped my tears away. He even chuckled as if he was only doing an easy mission

"Don't cry as if you're never going to see me again, Vestia..." he said in a matter-humming voice. I gulped and forced my head to nod only to be hugged by him as he patted my head in a slow manner

"Always remember my promise to you, Vestia, it will never be broken. Trust me, so stop crying and just believe in me," he said but in the blink of an eye, the warmth that I'd been feeling became colder and the cool breezes replaced him for me.

I didn't even realize that he had already left a few hours ago while I remained looking at the exit with such dull eyes.

"I believe in you, Claudius. I always have..."

"Milady, His Highness, the imperial crown prince requested for an audience in you," when Anna said those words, I stopped fiddling with my hands.

I looked in the mirror and saw how my eyes became void

"Also, young master Cain and young lady Celna sent you a letter, would you like to read them now?"

I looked at Anna who was looking at the letter from her tray and I sighed. I remembered her words from that day, and they made me feel sane in the dark moments I've been experiencing.

I felt like I had gotten back in time, where I would always have these dreary feelings and they wouldn't even let me go.

"In my own opinion Milady, people tend to be hurt because they need it for them to grow, be mature, and realize what's important to them, and not if there's no pain from their lives, they wouldn't be able to see the value of smaller things that gave them enough shelter of warmth..."

Her sweet voice echoed within my chamber and for that splitting second, there has been a tiny spark lighting my mind of the possibilities.

But seeing Claudius go that night, I felt like I was losing two of my very first friends.

"Milady, did something happen between you and his highness?" When I heard Anna ask, I looked at the one letter that stood out from the other two. It has indeed an imperial seal and is covered with gold glitters that overshadow the white hue.

I looked for that letter for the longest second before finally shaking my head. For now, let's just focus on the matters that need to be solved.

I have my faith in Claudius.

"Let's prepare then, Anna," I said with a smile. Anna smiled back and nodded as soon as she heard my agreement but I kind of feel sorry for her since I don't want her to be involved in this dangerous task.

It took us a few more whilst before having me looked in the mirror. Just like I suggested, I looked good in a plain dark blue dress. My hair was straightened down without any locks. I got to touch my bangs but I managed to smile.

The blue dress could hug my body, but it was too plain for the crown prince to notice it.

I remembered that I used to prepare a lot whenever I got a chance to see him in the past. I would always wear floral dresses and have as much jewelry on my hand as possible I can, and yet in the end, he wouldn't even come to our agreed meeting since the emperor would be the one to call me instead.

Then I couldn't help but compare myself to Liana who was also wearing floral dresses and had little jewelry and yet, she would always capture Caliere's heart. Thinking back then, if the old me saw me now, she would feel embarrassed.

But then, because I've changed, as I am no longer chasing Caliere's shadows, so has my heart also changed.

Right now, all I felt was nothing, I couldn't feel excited, remorse, sad, or happy like the ones in my previous life. Perhaps, I only felt dull.

The carriage ride from my household to the imperial household took an hour for me to finally land on the imperial grounds.

The servants guided me to where Caliere was, and I smiled at them. I let them lead me to the imperial garden, and see that Caliere prepared our conversation to be held.

I do remember what he said back then. I narrowed my eyes to look at the table and two chairs across each other. There were pastries lined up in the middle and tea on the sides.

There were no servants around and I could see how fluttering and nostalgic the scenery would be if only I was my old self.

"It was such a pleasure for me to finally meet my fiancé after those long years," his voice from behind me sent shivers down my spine and when I blinked, he was already in front of me leaning closer while kissing some strands of my hair in his hand.

"Y-Your H-Highness, I greet thee," I said. I didn't stutter for whatever reason other than being startled at his sudden actions.

I bowed in front of him and he only chuckled. I didn't know back then that I would feel disdain if I heard that voice or even his chuckle when they used to bring me summery vibes only when it was directed at Liana.

Setting those thoughts aside, he held my hand and led me to our table. When the cold wind passed us, I closed my eyes for a moment trying to stay focused on my situation.

However, when I opened them, I felt this lingering gaze from the crown prince that I hadn't seen in the past.

"I thought you would always want to wear floral dresses as they would always be the trend in the empire," he would be saying that I should have worn those to attract his attention.

I smiled, faking my best way just to get from him the main words of why he wanted me to come to his place.

"It's true of that Your Highness, but these days, I prefer to be simple like this," I uttered in a respectful manner to which I saw his eyes narrowed. He was eyeing me from the start.

"But I guess you just picked what I liked," he said and I widened my eyes. He looked at me and my reaction as I averted my gazes from him to drink the tea

"How could I, Your Highness," I only said while looking at the Ivy again.

I heard him chuckle, then silence became a deafening sound yet I somewhat liked it that way, until he came to his main words.

"I guess I should have been hearing your words about our engagement now, Lady Vestia. What do you think?"

"I think that we should annul our engagements, Your Highness"

"Why?" He said, I never thought he would stand from his seat but I managed to answer his words

"As I've said before, Your Highness----" I felt his presence leaning over me. He even held my hair twirling it around. I stopped talking to look at him but he was only smiling.

"Just call me Caliere, Lady Vestia and I will do the same. This time, it wasn't a request but it was a command from me. Besides, even if you want to annul our engagement, that could never happen..."

"Why?" I asked him this time

Yet he never answered, he only stepped backward before coming to his seat and drinking his tea.

"Your Highness I have warned you, that marriage was only for two people who were bound to love each other. Don't you want to feel that too?"

I heard him laugh but it was enough to know that it was venomous.

"There's no use to having that now, Vestia because as you said, I'm the crown prince..."

***

"I bestow my son and the Lady of the Monsiore household an official engagement by the end of this month..."