Chapter 48

And I was just worrying my mind out for him and he freaking stood me up? I can't believe I believed him. I knew it, things were too good to be true. Of course why will he choose me, just a freaking nerd.

I thought angrily as I wiped all my makeup off.

Stupid stupid stupid. I even tried to put makeup on for him. All this freaking for him and gods why am I so stupid.

I changed back into my pjs, and to distract myself, I binge watched Pretty Little Liars; but even binge watching my favorite show didn't get my mind off him.

Dinner was tensed, my parents knew and they were furious and disappointed in themselves for believing in him. I acted like it didn't affect me, like it was no big deal.

They were skeptical, but they didn't want to bring it up. As soon as I finished dinner, I hurried back into my room, mumbling that I wanted to finish binge watching Pretty Little Liars.

It was hard to ignore their sympathetic eyes that followed me until I was up the stairs. I tried to watch a few episodes but it was completely useless. I gave up soon after that and ended reading. Still my mind refused to shut up and I kept on replaying all the possibilities.

How am I ever going to be able to face him? Do I just pretend nothing happened? But how could I? Does this means he was playing me this whole freaking time? Was his confession nothing? The kisses?

But the worse thing was that despite all of this, I was glad he wasn't in an accident. And some part of me, deep down still hoped it was real and not some stupid joke.

But what else could have happened? Why? I don't understand.

Sleep finally found me after hours of torturing myself with the same thoughts over and over again, replaying in my head like a broken tape.

Buzz buzz buzz

Am I dreaming?

Slowly I blinked, trying to regain my eyesight, but the darkness didn't disappear. Squinting my eyes hard, the faint outline of my room appeared.

Buzz buzz buzz

"What is that freaking noise?" I muttered to myself, "whatever I'm going back to sleep."

Buzz buzz buzz

Buzz buzz buzz

Buzz buzz buzz

"URGH." I threw off my blanket and listened intensely for the source of it.

Buzz buzz buzz

It came from my nightstand, my brain couldn't work, then I finally realized it was my phone.

Who the fuck is messaging me this late at night. I'm going to murder them.

Scowling, I grabbed my phone and was almost blinded by my screen. After adjusting it, I finally saw what was on my phone.

5 missed calls from Asher

23 messages from Asher.

Asher? What Asher? Then the events of today rushed back to me and I was even more angry then before.

First he stood me up, then he wake me up, I am going to murder him.

I wanted to mute it, block him, turn off my phone, but curiosity got to the better of me and reluctantly I opened his messages.

12:57

Hey you are probably asleep but I'm sorry

I'm really sorry I know what I did was shitty but please let me explain

1:09

Hey

Hey

Hey

I can't wait till tomorrow I have to tell you now before I lose you

1:15

I'm sorry

I'm really really sorry

I really shouldn't be spamming you but please listen to me

Please give me a chance

1:34

I can't wait longer, I'm coming

1:47

Hey I'm outside right now

Like really outside

Please open the door I don't want to ring the doorbell to wake up anyone else

2:01

I will wait here till you come out

Please

Oh shit you are probably asleep

But still I will be here when you wake up

I need to explain myself

I don't want you going to sleep wondering why

It's not your fault

I will tell you everything

Please I'm so sorry

He wasn't actually outside right? No way he would actually do that.

But what if he really is?

My stupid, hopeless conscious asked.

There's no hurt in actually checking right?

So against my better judgement and common sense, I got off my bed and quietly went downstairs.

He wouldn't actually be here. This is so stupid. I thought as I opened the door, a gust of cold air greeted me and I shivered.

Why did I actually did this and believed him?

My eyes scanned the darkness, wait is that his car?

Is that him?

Sitting on the stairs of my porch, was Asher, shivering in his thin hoodie and jeans.

"Asher." I said, then I realized how loud I sounded in the dead silence of the night.

His head whipped back so fast, I thought I heard it crack, "Laura?"

"What are you doing here," I whispered furiously.

"I-I have to apologize." He whispered back, coming up the porch, both arms wrapped around himself.

"You could have done that tomorrow! Not in the middle of the night." I hissed at him, the cold was starting to sweep through my thin hoodie.

"I-I couldn't wait and I know this is not the best time and oh god I messed up again didn't I?" He gave me a humorless laugh.

"Come in, you are going to freeze to death if you stay out any longer." I said distastefully, noting his pink cheeks and shivering body.

He hesitated. Getting impatient and tired of the cold, I pulled him in and shut the door quietly. His hand was freezing, it was like holding ice.

I beckoned him to follow me upstairs, in my room, I forced him to go onto my bed and wrapped him up in my blankets. He finally stopped shivering, but his cheeks were still pink.

"Well?" I raised an eyebrow, waiting for his explanation.

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

I rolled my eyes.

"I'm sorry for standing you up like that but I really do have a reason." He exhaled slowly, "I was preparing for our date when my brother" there was so much venom in one simple word I was too stunned to form words, " barged in drunk and started picking a fight. I ignored him as usual but then he-he said something, and it provoked me so much I snapped back and the next thing I knew we were fighting."

I swallowed back a gasp, he didn't continued and was looking at me, but not really looking. He was staring at my direction but wasn't really looking at me, he had such a faraway look in his eyes; I wondered was he even here at all.

Silence eased between us as we both struggled to comprehend what had happened. At last, he spoke again, "We stopped when our father came back, but he didn't even care, he barely gave us a glance and went back into his room." There was a slightest crack that he tried to hide, "And my brother left the house after our father's door slammed shut."

"And then I was so angry, I started drinking again and I completely forgot about the date. And when I send that shitty text I was drunk. I'm-I'm just really sorry Laura, I didn't mean to stand you up."

Now I knew why his cheeks were still pink, my anger diminished and understanding replaced it, "Hey, it's okay, I get it. I forgive you."

It was like he didn't hear me, "I am really sorry, and once again my brother ruined my life. God I just- I- I am just really sorry. If only I could control myself then I-" he kept on rambling and I couldn't take it anymore so I shut him up.

A kiss was definitely an effective way to shut someone up. He was too startled to react when I leaned in, but his body knew before his mind did. He pulled me in so hard I fell on him and we ended up tangled in the blankets.

Then we were laughing, for no reason, maybe it was the ridiculous positions we were in; or the fact that he was drunk and I was sleep deprived; or we were just crazy. I think it was a mixture of all three. We laughed till no sound came out of us, till we were gasping for breath.

"Okay okay, stop," I took a deep breath, "we will wake my parents up." That sobered him up and we quiet down.

"I really am sorry Laura, I never meant to stand you up." He said serious, looking down at me because somehow I was sprawled on top of him with the blankets.

"I know, I forgive you."