19. A Bullet of Love

Numbness was all I had with me. I wasn't able to believe that this was the same person who I danced in the club with, who I got drunk with, who was there for me, who I was maybe falling in love with.

I didn't get up from my bed for the whole day. Luckily for me, it was a weekend so I didn't have to go to work. However, it was also the night I had to go out with Sanjana. I told her that I would go, I couldn't leave her all alone in a club with God knows how many gangsters in it.

I didn't feel like dressing up so I just put on my usual blue skinny jeans with a white sweater, I wore my usual black boots. I washed my face and moisturised, untangled my hair and put it in a loose side-braid.

When I stepped out, I saw Sanjana standing in the kitchen all dressed up. She wore my dress, which I wore at the party my father threw for me. She had put minimal make-up with a dark shade of lipstick.

"What kind of rubbish are you wearing? We are going to a club, not a poetry recital." She said when she saw me.

"I really don't feel like dressing up. Can we just go and get this over with?"

"Okay. But I still think you should change." She said with a shrug.

"I am not changing." I stated and walked out of the apartment with Sanjana trailing behind me lecturing me about how I needed to loosen up a bit and I totally ignored her.

I walked to my car and sat in the driver's seat; I turned the heat on as soon as I got inside; It was freezing outside. Sanjana got into the car and slammed the door shut, extra hard.

I gave her a look. She knew how I got when it came to cars.

"What? I am annoyed. You never listen to me." She said when she noticed me looking at her.

"I would listen to you if you talked about something sensible." I said with an eye-roll.

.

We got into the club. Sanjana's name was on the list and mine was listed as her plus one. She walked straight towards the bar and ordered two drinks.

"I am not going to drink." I reminded her.

"No, they are both for me." She told me and drank the first glass in one breath and went for the other glass till I snatched it from her.

"Slow down."

"I can't. I have to meet a particular dangerous person." She said trying to take the glass from my hand.

"Yeah, that's why we need you sober." I told her. She huffed and sat down on the bar stool. I took a seat right beside her.

"Hello bellissima." I heard a male voice say. He had a prominent Italian accent.

I turned around and saw a man in his late twenties standing there. He had blonde hair and brown eyes. His features were very sharp. He was hot.

Not as much as a certain someone. A voice in the back of my head spoke and I pushed it back.

"Hey, Lorenzo." Sanjana said. He took her hand and bent forward to kiss it.

"You look beautiful." He complimented her and she blushed. Actually blushed. I have never seen her blush. The scene in front of me was the cutest thing I had ever seen.

"Thank you. This is my friend, Naina." She said, pointing towards me. "Naina, this is Lorenzo."

"It is nice to meet you." I said to him with a smile.

"You too, bella." He said and then ducked forward to kiss my hand too. "Do you mind if I steal your beautiful friend away for a little while?" He asked me and I nodded.

"Go on. I will be fine here." I said to Sanjana.

.

After sitting for around fifteen minutes at the bar, I got bored. I took my phone out. There were around hundred messages and missed calls from Shiv.

Maybe I was thinking too much. I didn't even let him explain himself. But I felt like he didn't deserve it. Maybe he had changed but I was too blinded by the anger to try to think about his back story.

He did deserve to explain it to me. He had done nothing wrong to me, but to those women. I didn't know how old those pictures were. His father is sick in the head for stalking him and taking pictures of him with women. But I didn't think about anything but wanting to protect myself and my baby.

I thought about texting him that I wanted an explanation. Then those pictures flashed through my mind. I dreaded ever having to talk to him. But I needed to talk to him, he was the father of my child after all.

While I was contemplating all of the thoughts, I heard the music stop and the whole club was silenced. I stepped down from the stool and turned around to see what was happening. I saw a crowd form around a particular corner of the club. I walked over and made my way to the front.

I gasped a little too loud at the sight, in a totally silent room. Most of the eyes turned to me, even the ones I dreaded to look into.

Shiv.

He was standing there in front of Lorenzo, several feet away. Lorenzo had a revolver in his hand, pointing straight at Shiv who mirrored Lorenzo.

How did he get a gun? Why would he need a gun?

Then I saw Sanjana looking at me with fear in her eyes. She silently walked over to me.

"What is happening?" I whispered.

"There was supposed to be a deal in between them but Lorenzo broke the rules by making a deal with our company as well. Shiv was here for the meeting when he got to know that Lorenzo made a deal with us so he got mad but then Lorenzo pointed a gun at him out of the blue and Shiv pulled his gun out at the same time." She whispered very slowly in my ear as the people started to mutter.

"Oh shit."

"Mr. Bahl, I told you that our deal was over." Lorenzo started.

"I am aware, Mr. Morreti. But you didn't break the deal with us when you made a deal with another company. That is against the rules." Shiv replied to him.

"I did, I just didn't tell you." Lorenzo said with an evil smirk.

"Damn. He is so hot." I heard Sanjana whisper to me.

Really? I don't think so. He just seems stupid right now. I thought.

"Oh, I see. You do realise that for making or breaking a deal, both parties have to be informed about it?"  Shiv said.

"Yeah whatever." He shrugged.

"You aren't a very moral person, Mr. Morreti." Shiv said and his words really upset Lorenzo.

He pulled the trigger. A loud sound cut through the air as he did. All I thought then was about Shiv. I ran forwards towards him, not caring about anything else. I observed that the bullet had just grazed the side his arm and not went through. I sighed in relief.

"Are you okay?" He asked me.

He got shot and was asking if I was okay.

"You just got almost shot. I should be asking that to you." I said to him.

"I am fine, It just grazed through." He said.

Then I realised that the club had been emptied. Sanjana, Lorenzo, Shiv and I were the only ones left there.

"Come on, let's go home." I told him. "But that doesn't mean I forgave you."

"Okay. But please let me explain." He pleaded once again and I nodded.

I turned to Sanjana. "Come on, let's go home."

"I can't. You both go on. I will be fine." She replied.

"What do you mean you can't?" I asked her.

"I need to stay here. He had a deal with our company."

"So what? He just shot someone. Did you not see that?"

"I did but I have to stay. I will be fine." she said.

"You are stupid. Just please come home, I can't lose you." I told her.

"You won't. Trust me. I will be fine." She said.

"Promise you will come back?"

"I will. I promise. I am not leaving you alone." She said and I nodded before turning to leave.

.

I drove my car to Shiv's building. The car was filled with silence; none of us spoke anything. The only sound we heard was the sound of the engine and the music on the radio.

We made our way to his flat and he opened up the door. He then indicated me to sit on the couch when he started to walk to the kitchen to get some water.

"Wait. Sit here. I will bring the water. And tell me where the first aid kit is." I told him.

"Okay. It is in my closet, behind the door." I nodded and made my way over to his closet.

As I switched on the lights, I saw a huge pile of his sweatshirts in a cardboard box.

Why would he take them all out?

I left the thought and looked for the first aid kit. It was hung behind the door, a small red bag.

I then walked to the kitchen and filled up two glasses of water. I put them in a tray with the first aid kit and a bowl of water with a wash cloth. I walked out and saw him sitting on the sofa with his elbows on his thighs and his head in his palms. He looked up when I put the tray down on the table. I handed him a glass of water and took one for myself.

"Take off your shirt." I told him.

"What?"

"I need to clean that wound." I explained.

"Oh." he said and unbuttoned his light blue shirt which was ruined by a huge blood stain.

I would never get used to him being shirtless. I thought.

His abs, still the same and his strong biceps, just made me want to look at him forever.

I jumped when I heard him clear his throat and an amused expression crossed his features. He knew I always got lost in thought when I saw him shirtless. I rolled my eyes and put the wash cloth in the bowl of water and squeezed it a bit to get the excess water out.

I sat down beside him and cleaned up his wound. It was pretty big. I was surprised he handled the pain that well. I used some cotton to apply the antiseptic cream on the wound and then wrapped it up with a gauze. I felt his eyes on me while I did so.

"All done." I said after finishing up.

"Thank you." He said.

"It's fine."

"I guess I have some explaining to do."

"Yes, you do." I confirmed.

"So, let me start from the beginning. I was around 10 when my father started telling me that women were the dust in the feet of men. He said horrible things about women and I believed it all. I was young and looked up to my father, I didn't know much and my father was successful, I thought I needed to do whatever he was doing to be like him. He never let me talk to my mom properly. It went like that until I turned 18. I saw him beat my mother." He said and I winced.

"He told me that is what I needed to do to all women. He manipulated me. I never liked doing that. I told him but then he blackmailed me that he would beat my mother twice as hard. I wanted to move away from him but I couldn't leave my mother alone with him so I stayed. One day, I went to his office and saw him raping his secretary, who pleaded me to help her but I didn't. I couldn't. If I did, my mother was at stake." He said. I noticed he had tears in his eyes. I wiped them away and held his hand as he continued.

"Then just a day after my twentieth birthday, my mother killed herself." He said and I gasped. "She wasn't able to bear it anymore. It was also because I didn't help her. I could've helped her."

I hugged him and told him its okay.

"It was not your fault. You just wanted to keep her safe. You didn't know that would have happened. It is not your fault." I told him.

"But I didn't say anything."

"Because you didn't want your father to hurt her any more than he already did. She knew it too. I am sure. She loved you and she knew you loved her."

He didn't say anything, just cried into my lap as I soothed him by running my fingers through his hair.

.

"I am sorry." I said.

"Why are you sorry? It was my fault."

"No, I didn't give you a chance to explain. I am really sorry."

"It is not your fault. You were angry. It was justified. I was a horrible person; but I swear I am not the same person anymore. I would never even think of hurting you." He told me. "Please, give me another chance."

"Okay." I said.

"Really?" He said.

"Yes, really. But I don't want any more secrets between us." I said. Secrets lead to misunderstandings.

"Okay. I have another secret."

"What?" I asked.

"I love you."