Chapter 39

A/N: Hi there! I'm really sorry for late updates. I had to go through a few stuff and exams were popping up everywhere. But, I can assure you that from this week onwards, the story will be updated as usual. Thank you for all your support! Have a great day ahead!!

Continuing Rose's POV...

I was sinking. I was sinking in water. I was sinking in deep, dark water. I didn't move. I didn't want to move. I let all the water flow around me. Slowly, the water disappeared and left me hollow in a vacuum.

I stood up and glanced around me. Everything was dark. The empty void allowed me to stand in my own lonesome. For some reason, my nervousness left me.

A light flashed behind me. I turned around, carefully. A small frame stared into me. It's white eyes looked straight at mine. The white figure dissipated into a chubby girl. It was the 'childhood Rose'. I smiled warmly at her but she scowled at me.

Okay, that brat is a little intimidating!

But, the real question was;

Why?

"You robbed me!" She yelled in her tiny voice. What?

"You stole my future!" She kept talking. How could I...

"You took away my parents from me." Her voice faded a little. Oh...

"You took my soul." She murmured the last part and tears fell from her eyes. My heart constricted.

"I'm sorry but I don't understand." I tried to ease her. I didn't understand why this keeps coming back up again. I didn't feel sympathy but rather a more piercing emotion that ate away my conscience.

A few more figures appeared behind the tiny Rose. They were of my family. Father, Mum, and my brothers stood around 'Rose'.

My brothers were scowling at me. My Mum had a depressed look. Father had disappointment filling his eyes.

"You took our sister from us!" The twins yelled at me. Of course, I would have expected this reaction from their first impressions but I already learnt that there's much more than what's portrayed in the surface. But, that didn't lessen the hurt of their cruel words.

"We're disappointed in you. You are not our real daughter!" Mum and Father had contempt expressions. Is this what they'd feel when they find out the truth? My mind fell into a loophole of tragic incidents that have the possibility to occur.

A blaze of fire covered around me. What is this?! Why does it hurt so much???

The colour of the flame changed. Various colors with a vary of heat induction burned me. The fire stopped at a white colour. The heat of it was unbearable.

Chains! Hundreds of black chains wrapped around my arms and dragged me down to the invisible and involatile ground. They were rusty and old.

A rush of memories filled my head. My previous life flashed by me. One sudden memory jostled up my negative emotions. The memory displayed in front of me, clearly, though my head was screaming to let that memory stay buried forever.

I was once asked by a girl in my high school class to come to the ball room (A place used for storing sports equipment) afterschool. Little did I know what was going to happen to me.

I expected her to lash out at me for some reason. That's what always happened. She called out to one of her lackeys and brought up a bucket.

I knew she was going to dump water on me. It was raw bullying but I didn't have the motivation to fight back. I wanted to but then my hair won't be safe from the mean girls the next day. So, what did little young me do?

I decided to endure it.

Bad choice. I know.

She laughed a crazy smile at me and threw the bucket at my face. My lip bruised and bled.

Did it hurt?

No. I was numb to the pain.

My hair got wet from all the soda bottles she wasted. What a waste of money?

She didn't even bat an eye. I heard a girl slandering that I stole her crush or something. I looked at her clearly horrified but flashed her with my expressionless stare.

"Robot!" She shoved me and my head hit the wall of the room. They rushed off to their classes.

I looked around myself and took off my sweater. I used it as a towel and dried myself. Did I want revenge? No, it was too troublesome. It was best to ignore it!

Or that was what I thought would be the best.

My mindset back then created these chains and the pain. All that guilt of not standing up to what's right and mostly to myself came reverberating back in heavy chains. How did I even carry all this burden around this whole time.

I glanced at the memory before me and the 'me' now. I finally understood what Erebus meant by facing my fears. I was still dwelling on the past.

My past.

I carried around my pent up feelings this whole time.  I was guilty of acting like the 'Rose' of the story. I knew from the angel of my heart that I was stealing someone's else's place and the devil whispered how I should play the role without a hitch.

The figures in front of me weren't real. Why? Because I was the one who created them to strengthen my own walls and limit myself.

The figures of my family came back as the memory distorted from view. They pointed their fingers at me. The chains around me tightened. My body shivered from experience.

Silence filled the environment around me. The silence suddenly felt too loud.

There was one thing I realized. Something that made my hairs stand up.

I was inside my own mind. I never knew it was this dark inside.

I looked back up. The figures disappeared. I breathed a sigh of relief and immediately regretted how scared I was of my own past.

A familiar voice distracted me from my mind. It was Carlisa. A ghost of a smile appeared on my face.

"You think I was actually trying to be friends with you! How dumb can you be? I was pitying you." She sneered at me.

The void I was sitting on hardened a little. I felt myself becoming smaller.

The figure of Carlisa dissolved and blended with the darkness. I looked down at my knees. This was the same position I was in at the ball room. I feel pathetic!

"I thought you were different. But, I guess I was just fooling myself. " A male voice spoke.

Alvin?!

"You aren't strong. You are weak. You couldn't even take a joke. You are vulnerable and pathetic!" He laid it on me, thick. You too?

"Enough." I whispered out into the vision I was trapped in when I suddenly dawned in on what was happening.

Wait wait wait!

What?

Isn't this situation just too cliché?

Isn't this what all those male leads with trauma end themselves up in to break free and face their fears?

Ohhhhhh, now I get it! What a play!

"You robbed me! We are disappointed in you! How dumb can you be? You are weak!" All the voices rang in my ear at once. It was horrible. I was petrified. Well, I should have been.

Now, it all seemed...pitiful and funny. I actually ended up where these fantasy elements test the character. Actually, I'm glad that I'm here.

How many times have I failed in my past life? How many have criticized me before? How many have told me nicknames for their own entertainment? What is life, if one gets to be the social queen and the other the beggar on the street? Why do I keep trying so hard to fit in without seeing what's really in front of me?

Of course, that's right. I was scared out of my wits to accept that my new family will reject me too. But, the trust in my heart already said that it won't happen.

No, Blair, you should face this situation. Don't run away. After all, this is the chance that you get to face it like the warrior you are. Face it like the Dark Lord!

My conscience screamed at me. Come to think of it, many novels have this challenge where one's own self is being questioned and if so, I know just how to win this.

'Yes. Let's not run this time.' I told myself and stood up. One step at a time.

Let's play!