The Moral Dilemma: Chapter 33

“THAT WAS THE LAST ONE,” Raf calls out from the back. I kick the body at my feet, looking for any signs of life.

“Nothing on my end,” I say with a sigh.

“Did we go too hard?” He comes towards me, scratching his head as he looks at the carnage around us.

“Unlikely. They had no idea who hired them and the communications are encrypted. I doubt we’re going to find anything here,” I sigh.

“Damn it. And here I thought we’d get at least a lead on whoever ordered us dead.”

“Us?” I raise a brow. “You forget yourself, my husband. They ordered dead. You’re the most wanted one in this room.” I bat my lashes at him.

He gives me a crooked smile as he adjusts the neckline of his shirt. He’s soaked in blood from head to toe—not that I’m in a better state—but the sight of him all red like this has my toes curling, tiny butterflies congregating in my stomach.

Although we found the base where the mercenaries had gathered, we haven’t been able to gather any new information—and not due to lack of trying, as can be witnessed by the state of the bodies on the floor.

“I think I spotted a shower in the back. Would you join me, my lady?” He leans forward in a mock bow, and I can’t help but giggle. Well, at least there’s a perk in our little conquering adventure. Since we’ve been stranded in the wilderness for a few days, a shower would prove heavenly.

“Why, yes, brave Sir. I would love to join you after you’ve so courageously proved your prowess on the battlefield,” I reply, continuing his game.

He smirks, his eyes covetously scanning my body.

“Does that mean that my lady approves of me?”

“What is there to not approve?” I ask as I walk in a circle around him, pretending to admire him. “You’d kill and maim for me, wouldn’t you?”

Taking me by surprise, he suddenly grabs me by the waist, bringing me close to his body.

He nuzzles his cheek against mine.

“I would,” he rasps, his voice sending a chill down my back. “For you, I’d lay my morals and principles to the ground. For you, I’d wreck this world. For you, I’d fight dirty—with no honor. For you, I’m capable of anything, Noelle.” He pauses. “Because I also trust you not to put me into a situation in which I’d hate myself. This goes both ways. There’s nothing I do if you asked me. But I also know you would never ask me something that would betray myself. You have full power over me, pretty girl.”

My lips pull up in a smile, a low hum of approval emerging from my throat.

“You’re right. I want you wild and free, but only with me. I want you raw and real, but with me. But it’s not because I want to change you—I would wish that. I’m merely encouraging you to embrace your true self, that part of you that you’ve locked away for so long—the part

know you have.” I take a deep breath. “But I respect you just as much as I love you, and for that reason, I would never use that power irresponsibly.”

Shifting around, I hook my arms around his neck, bringing his face close to mine.

“You have full power over me, too,” I whisper, blowing gently against his lips. “I’ll be your lover, your shield and your sword. Never doubt that.”

“I don’t want you to be my shield.” He shakes his head. “I don’t ever want to see you put yourself in front of me, only ever beside me.”

I smile slowly, taking in his intense gaze.

“You’re the only one who’d ever see me as an equal.”

“Oh, how wrong you are, pretty girl,” he chuckles. “How could you ever be my equal when I hold you in higher regard than anything and anyone in my life?”

Tipping my jaw up, he lays a lingering kiss on my lips.

“We’re not equal. We’ll be equal. But that’s okay. Because I was made to worship you,” he whispers, brushing his lips against mine in a slow and agonizing dance.

My heart is pounding in my chest, his words embedding deep into my soul. My gaze on his, it’s almost as if time stands still, both an eternity and a second passing at the same time.

“Then worship me,” I whisper, licking his lips with a swipe of my tongue. “Take me.”

He doesn’t need to be told twice.

His hands on my ass, he swoops me up in his arms, taking me to the shower.

The base is military in design, set up under an abandoned warehouse. From what we’ve scouted, it seems to be a regular gathering place for mercenaries when they have a job in the area.

There is a sprawling shower area that stretches into a locker room, which means we have all the space in the world.

My back meets the tiled wall. Raf doesn’t wait for me to remove my clothes, tearing at them with his bare hands. It’s not long before we are both naked, our clothes a messy pile on the ground.

With one hand, he starts the shower, the water cascading down on us and washing away the foreign blood.

I look up at him from beneath wet lashes, breathing hard as I take in his beautiful face.

“I love you,” I say, cupping his cheeks. “I love you so damn much, there aren’t enough days in my life to show it to you.”

His lips draw up into a blinding smile.

“Oh, I’ll know. I’ll always know, pretty girl. Because you’ll always be the mirror for love.”

His hands on my ass, he positions me on top of his cock before driving into me in one smooth thrust. We both moan at the sensation—at how our bodies become one.

I don’t think I’ll ever cease to marvel at the beauty of being with him; of feeling like I’m finally whole instead of just one half.

The water pours down our bodies, wiping away all the past misfortune, all the missed encounters. We might have lost so much time, loving, but not knowing whom. But it was all for this very moment—for when we meet with no more lies between us, no more secrets.

This time, it’s just us.

There might have been tragedy in our past. There might have been loss. But together we can move on from that pain.

Only together.

I tip my chin up, eagerly receiving his kiss. He drives himself inside me harder and harder each time, swallowing my moans and cries while giving me all of his.

He makes love to my soul while he fucks my body, and I swear to God I’ve never felt so fulfilled before.

Both his personas have merged; my best friend and my lover.

I hold onto him as my climax washes over me, feeling his release as it coats my insides. Even as we’re done, he’s reluctant to withdraw from my body, simply keeping me to his chest while he murmurs sweet words of love into my ear. Eventually, though, we take turns washing each other, but even that turns into a little game as he teases me while I splash water onto him.

“Maybe it wasn’t such a great idea to destroy the only clothes we had?” I add, amused, after we’ve finally turned the water off. That must have been the longest shower in the history of showers, but I’m not mad. Not as I meet his gaze, a carefree grin pulling at his lips.

“There are some clothes there. I checked. Although they might be a little big for you, but we’ll make do.”

He opens a few lockers, showing me the clothes he’d found. He has no issues with them as they fit him like a glove. In my case, however, I practically swim in the pair of trousers I try on.

“What if I just use this shirt as a dress?” I suggest. It’s already hanging to my knees.

“No,” Raf shakes his head. “You have no underwear on, pretty girl, and I won’t have you going anywhere outside this building like this.”

“Then I’m afraid we’re out of options.”

“Not quite,” he says, finding a pair of gym shorts.

He makes me step inside them, and when they’re all the way up, he pulls on the waistband, gathering the material to the back and tying it with a hair tie.

“Can you move?”

I take a few tentative steps, surprised to see they aren’t falling off.

“I think I’m good.” I nod at him.

We spend a little more time nosing around the locker rooms, curious about the identity of the men we’d killed. Although there are a few personal items here and there, it’s not enough to get a clear picture of who sent them. They all come from different backgrounds and have seemingly nothing in common.

Raf fishes out a basketball from one of the lockers, and while he’s studying it, I surprise him by slapping it out of his hands.

His eyes go wide for a moment before he gives chase.

“So you want to play rough, huh?” He raises a brow at me.

“Depends on what you’ve got,” I challenge.

Of course, while I might be fast because I’m smaller, I’m no match for Raf, who catches me in a matter of seconds, stealing the ball from me.

“You’re not playing fair.” I pout when he holds it above his head.

I jump once. Twice. But it’s in vain. No matter how high I jump, I’ll never reach his height.

He baits me by lowering it to my level before snatching it back up. He does this a couple of times, and as I recognize his pattern, I wait until I know he’s about to lower it before I jump as high as I can with my fist raised.

I manage to punch the ball out of his hand, although it turns out to be quite painful, especially considering my injured wrist.

“Auch,” I whimper in a low voice, though it’s enough for Raf to become alarmed. His expression switches in the blink of an eye. The playfulness from before is all but gone as he grabs both my arms to inspect my injuries.

“I need to dress these up again,” he notes pensively. “The bandages are wet.”

“It’s fine,” I try to tell him, but he doesn’t listen to a word I say as he takes me to a bench, bringing the first aid kit with him and working on patching my injuries again.

He’s so focused on what he’s doing that it takes him a moment to hear the noises from the other room.

My eyes grow wide in alarm.

“Shh,” he whispers, immediately reaching for a gun.

I do the same, trailing behind him, ready to shoot the newcomers.

Yet just as we round the corner, we come across the most unexpected pair.

“What the hell are doing here?” Raf demands.

My mouth is hanging open in shock.

“This is quite… the welcome,” my brother smiles as he scans the dead bodies.

Yuyu is behind him, dressed all in black.

“How did you find us?” I frown.

“By following the trail of bodies you left behind,” Cisco says, getting a handkerchief from his pocket and wiping a drop of blood from his shoe.

I roll my eyes. Typical Cisco.

“We intercepted your SOS signal and we found the site of the plane crash,” Yuyu interjects, giving Cisco a look that says .

He inclines his head at her, a smile playing at his lips.

“When we arrived there, you were already gone, and we found the bodies of the six men.”

“And you just happened to come across this place?” Raf asks, sharing my skepticism.

“No. We tracked it using old fashioned techniques. There aren’t many cars in the jungle to leave trails behind.” Cisco shrugs.

I narrow my eyes on him. Easy.

easy. But I don’t think this is the moment to pick a fight. Not when all I want is to get home, lay down in my comfy bed with my husband spooning me from behind. Yes, that comes first. I can pick a fight with Cisco later.

“Do you know who these guys are?” Yuyu asks.

I shake my head.

“We couldn’t find out who sent them.”

“We’ll have plenty of time to figure that out at home. We should leave before we invite more danger though. Not that it wouldn’t be fun,” he looks at Yuyu, smiling, before turning to us, suddenly sobering up. “But I think both of you should see a doctor as soon as possible.”

“We’re fine,” I say at the same time as Raf agrees with him, “We should.”

“Raf,” I whisper.

“What? I want someone to look at your arm to make sure everything’s fine.”

I purse my lips.

“Alright. But only if you’ll get a chest scan, deal?”

“Deal.” He winks, leaning in to kiss my cheek.

“Well, it seems someone’s back on good terms,” Cisco whistles suggestively.

“What can I say?” I shrug. “Facing death has a way of bringing people together.”

Cisco and Yuyu share a surprised look.

“Noelle told me everything that happened at the , and I believe her,” Raf interjects. “We’ve come to terms with our past and we’ve decided to leave it all behind. I love her and that’s all that matters,” he declares, and his features soften as he turns to me.

I smile bashfully, reaching with my finger to grab his hand.

“And I guess everyone here knows that I love him,” I chuckle.

“Oh, we know,” Cisco notes, while Yuyu nods.

In just a second, we’re all laughing. My antics when it comes to Raf are already legendary, and though at the time they were of utmost importance, now I can see how some of my actions might have been a little… silly.

“You should have seen her face when the condoms dropped out of her bag,” Cisco recounts that one embarrassing incident, and I do my best not to bury my head in the sand.

“So what?” I burst out. “I was in love with him, and that’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

“Except for the fact that you were underage,” Cisco mutters under his breath.

Yuyu swats him lightly, giving him a look that says He promptly shuts up.

My brother might not be the best interlocutor, but it seems he’s quite good at taking tacit orders—or at least he is when it comes to Yuyu.

We all leave the bunker, and Raf and I are surprised to be taken to a private jet not too far from here. It seems Cisco and Yuyu came fully prepared. There are craters full of weapons in the back of the plane.

“How the hell did you bring this all the way to Mexico? And how do you plan to take them out of the country?” I ask as I point to the craters.

“Oh, those?” Yuyu is the one who speaks this time. “We didn’t bring them from home. We bought them here. Some were for the rescue mission, in case we needed to use force, and the rest are souvenirs.”

“Souvenirs? For who?”

“For me.” She smiles brightly. “Cisco knows I like to collect a few weapons every now and then, and when he placed the order for the guns, he also asked for a little something for me.”

“Sorry to break it to you, Yuyu, but this is way more than ”

“He likes to spoil me,” she gushes, seemingly not realizing my sarcastic tone.

Whatever. They can be all mushy and weird together—not that I want to imagine my brother like that. Years later and it’s still impossible to reconcile the ruthless authoritarian that Cisco is as the head of the family with the doting husband he is to Yuyu.

It’s as if there are two completely different people residing in the same body. Of course, something similar could be said of me, too, since my soft spot only applies to Raf. But no matter how ruthless I am, I know my brother can be more so.

The truth is that he scares me. Now, and before. And what terrifies me the most is that I still don’t know the extent of his involvement in my life until now. Because some coincidences… let’s just say they are too coincident to be coincidences.